Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Fight Back II

Fight Back
My recent article about the "consultation" by Nanny, re what else she should do to target smokers, provoked some interesting and diverse expressions of opinions.

Therefore to add a little more fuel to the fire, let me give you an example of just how daft Nanny's anti smoking legislation really is.

Eva and I perchanced to visit our local pub, The Bedford, recently and observed that all the customers were sitting outside.

For why?

Many of the customers were smokers.

Fair enough you might say, because the legalisation was designed to also protect the bar staff from second hand fag fumes.

Aha...hoisted upon your own petard!

For you see, dear readers, the barmaid was also a smoker and she was outside too having a fag.

Call me a recidivist if you will (and if you can), but doesn't this make Nanny's anti smoking legislation (and Nanny herself) look a little ridiculous?

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Friday, August 29, 2008

Prats of The Week - The Home Orifice

Prats of The Week - The Home OrificeAh a cheerful, grey Friday morning; just the right time to award my prestigious, and world renowned, "Prats of The Week" Award.

This week it goes to the Home Orifice (so deserving, on so many occasions, I wonder if I should make this a lifetime "achievement award?).

Anyhoo, here is why I think they deserve this award.

The Home Orifice, in a naive and wasteful use of taxpayers' money have attempted to bring the "yoof" vote onto their side. They have set up a website (MyLifeMyId.org) for 16 to 25 year olds to express their views about identity cards.

I assume the "brains" in the Home Orifice thought that they would get a tidal wave of approval for the scheme; yet all they got in return is scorn, sneering and scepticism.

Eg:

"The NIS is an authoritarian imposition on this country and places the desires of the state above the rights of the people. It will entail threatening the public and extorting money from them until they comply.

The biggest effect it will have on my life is to completely redefine my relationship with the state. Now I'll have to tell them everything about myself and will be forced to keep it up to date and will be responsible for it's accuracy while having no power to control how it's used/stored/accessed.

The state has all of the rights and I have all of the responsibility.

Political language is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind
."

Good for the "yoof" of Britain!

Odd that the Home Orifice could make such a bad judgement call on "yoof" issues, given that our "respected" and "highly qualified" Home Secretary (Jacqui Smith) was a teacher (Home Econ was it?) herself.

Seemingly there was also a YouTube video featuring Jacqui Smith, which was meant to augment the website. However, it had its comments section disabled and now seems to have disappeared.

Fear not though, one individual resurrected it (and enabled comments):



Rest assured, because the responses have not been up to Jacqui's expectations, the government will ignore them and try to airbrush them from history.

The Home Orifice well deserving winners of the Lifetime Achievement Award for "Prats of The Week".

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Thursday, August 28, 2008

Nanny Bans Stairs

Nanny Bans Stairs
Here is a rather daft example of Nannyism from my beloved home town of Croydon.

I pooped into the bar of our local theatre (The Warehouse) the other day, it has been a couple of years since I had a drink in there, and saw that the upstairs bar had been closed down a while ago.

For why?

Aha, can you guess?

Yes, that's right, our old "friend" health and safety!

It seems that the health and safety officers of our council have deemed that the stairs were too steep, and they banned the stairs (the only access point to the rather cosy upstairs bar) from being used; hence the bar had to be closed at some expense.

Now here are a couple of points that kind of make that judgement look daft:

1 The stairs have been used for the last 20 years, without any form of injury

2 If the stairs were not so steep, how the hell would they reach the next floor?

Farking stupid!

However, as you can see from my fight with Croydon council over the arena project, Croydon council wanted The Warehouse shut down anyway. I suspect that this was one of their nasty little tricks to try to shut the place down.

Fortunately the council failed on both counts!

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Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Fight Back

Fight Back
Those of you who want to do something useful, and at least gum up the bureaucracy of the state, should pop over to the Forest site and fill in their e response to Nanny's consultation on the future of tobacco control.

You can rest assured that the anti smoking fascists will be doing the same.

The form can be accessed here.

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Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Plod Goes To The Chippie

Plod Goes To The ChippieIt does seem that Nanny's state police force is getting a little bit full of itself, as Andrew Carter discovered to his cost recently.

Mr Carter observed a police van reversing the wrong way up a one-way street in Bristol, in fact it almost knocked him over, and rather unwisely challenged it.

He was told by one of the cuntstables driving the van to:

"F*** off, this is police business."

What precisely was this urgent police business?

Errmm...they were on the way to the chip shop!

Mr Carter then photographed the police van outside the chip shop.

Can you guess what happened next?

Yes, that's right, PC Aqil Farooq told him he was under arrest for assault, resisting arrest and being drunk and disorderly.

Mr Carter was then handcuffed and bundled into the back of the van, locked in a police cell for five hours, forced to give a sample of his DNA and had his fingerprints taken. After his release he spent a week on bail, before he was he told he would not be charged.

PC Farooq and a woman officer claimed they needed to visit the takeaway shop to view CCTV footage.

Farooq was made to apologise in person to Mr Carter but he still has his job.

Avon and Somerset deputy chief constable Rob Beckley wrote to Mr Carter, apologising for the officer's 'totally unacceptable' behaviour.

Errmmm...is that it then?...a false arrest was made, ie the police lied, and all that happens is that an apology is made?

What kind of state are we living in?

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Saturday, August 23, 2008

The Home Orifice - Worse Than Worthless

The Home Orifice - Worse Than Worthless
Those of you who have been worried about what Nanny intends to do with all the data that she is collecting about us, and wants to collect on us, should not worry.

Nanny does not intend to keep it, or indeed use it, she intends to lose it!

Added to the list of shame of incompetent government departments is Nanny's Home Orifice. It has managed to lose a memory stick that contains details of thousands of criminals, informers, police officers etc.

Well done lads!

However, Nanny in the shape of our highly "qualified" (wasn't she a teacher or something?) Home Secretary (Jacqui Smith) has been quick to point out that Nanny didn't lose the data, but PA Consulting (a private firm) lost it.

So that's alright then!

Errrmmm...no not quite Jacqui, as you are the people who hired PA Consulting you are therefore responsible for ensuring that they are up to the job.

QED!

Let us be clear, this government is complete shite and could not be trusted to sit the right way on a lavatory let alone handle confidential data.

There is no way we should allow it to collect any more data about us, eg via ID cards, medical records etc etc.

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Friday, August 22, 2008

Fat Attack

Fat Attack
Nanny has two great obsessions:

1 Obesity

2 Children (her acolytes are forever shrilly screeching "think of the children!")

Combine the two obsessions, and you have a deadly and poisonous cocktail.

Nanny and her chums in from our much "respected" local authorities (The Local Government Association - LGA) have let it be known that "dangerously overweight" children will have to be taken from their parents and put into care.

Errmm...isn't that kind of a Nazi type of action? The Nazis in occupied countries took children of "Germanic appearance" back to Germany for "Germanification".

Didn't we send people to their deaths to fight against this sort of thing over 60 years ago?

The LGA has predicted that social services teams would have to take drastic action to improve the health of seriously overweight children. In the view of the Gestapo from the LGA, very "fat" children are victims of "parental neglect".

In the view of the LGA, based on their "logic", social services would have to intervene "more and more" with obese children. The LGA also stated that councils would have to take action against parents who put their children's health at risk, and take the fattest into "care".

David Rogers, the LGA spokesman on public health, said:

"Councils are increasingly having to consider taking action where parents are putting children's health in real danger.

Councils would step in to deal with an undernourished or neglected child, so should a case with a morbidly obese child be different?

If parents place children at risk through bad diet and lack of exercise is it right for a council to keep the child's health under review?

It is vital that councils, primary care trusts and the NHS work with parents to ensure children don't end up dangerously overweight in the first place.

There needs to be a national debate about the extent to which it is acceptable for local authorities to take action in cases where the children's welfare is in jeopardy
."

Precisely how will this help the children?

The psychological damage to the child, as he/she is forcefully removed from his/her parents, would massively outweigh any short term possible benefit of weight reduction.

The morbidly obese tend to use food as a "comfort", increase their stress levels by snatching them from their parents and they will simply eat more.

How can people who live in a democracy and claim to believe in a democracy, even contemplate such action?

This proposal stinks!

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Thursday, August 21, 2008

Wasting My Money

Wasting My Money
As you know, I have a healthy dislike of local councils, actually I rather loath them.

Here is one very good example as to why I dislike them so much.

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Wednesday, August 20, 2008

True Grit - Yorkshire Style

True Grit - Yorkshire StyleMy compliments to the good people of Birks Road in Huddersfield, who showed some true Yorkshire grit and gave the rest of us a lesson in how to make our local councils sit up and take notice.

The residents have been having a spot of bother with their binmen recently (sound familiar?), industrial action had left them without a rubbish collection for a month.

Anyhoo, the dispute was settled and the Kirklees Council lorry finally arrived to take away one month's detritus etc.

Unfortunately there was one small fly in their oinkment, Nanny's binmen would only empty the households' wheelie bins, they would not take any loose bags which had piled up.

There was a stand off for two weeks, and the binmen still refused to take away all of the rubbish.

Householders complained to the Tory run council, it offered to send a "rapid response" vehicle to collect the extra rubbish.

Guess what?

It never arrived!

Could someone please tell me why we pay council tax and why we have local councils, if basic sanitation services such as refuse collection are not provided?

Patience finally snapped, the binmen arrived at 13:30 (they are scheduled to arrive at 7:15) and one man parked his car across the street, preventing the bin lorry from getting out. Other residents formed a human chain around the truck, while a group of children sat in front of it and refused to move.

The people won, and the rubbish was collected.

Community action for the people by the people, against the council!

I love it (it has warmed the cockles of my heart...can I say that?)!

It is time for others to take action against their inefficient, lazy, jobsworth, Nannyish councils.

True Grit!

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Tuesday, August 19, 2008

The Return of The Bottom Inspectors - Clench Your Buttocks!

The Return of The Bottom InspectorsOh dear, it looks as though Nanny's feared and hated Bottom Inspectors have returned.

Nanny is now so fearful about our level of fatness, funny how it is that so many MPs are real porkers isn't it?, that she is mounting (can I say mounting so early in the morning?) a campaign to have us exercise at bus stops.

Nanny believes that the time spent at bus stops could be better spent by standing on one leg, pointing our toes and clenching our buttocks.

I have to say it has been a fair while since I had a good old "clench"!

Nanny is handing out leaflets and posters setting out six Pilates-style exercise moves to do at the bus stops, for bus routes between Blackburn and Manchester.

The "Every Stop Helps" leaflet tells passengers:

"Healthy living is all about having a good diet and getting the right amount of physical exercise.

Make exercising on the X41 part of your everyday bus travel. The exercises are easy, fun to do and discreet
!"

Come on everyone, let's show Nanny what we think of her by engaging in a mass buttock clench!

The good news is that we are funding this scheme via Nanny's Higher Education Funding Council for England.

Errmmm...given that this is a health issue, shouldn't the money come out of the NHS?

Let's cut the crap shall we?

If Nanny wants to get us all slim again (quickly and cheaply) all she has to do is get us hooked on cocaine, an appetite suppressant favoured by the glitterati. It's cheap, readily available and provides thousands of people who deal it with a living.

Nanny should legalise it and tax it.

Problem sorted!

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Monday, August 18, 2008

Nanny Bans Balaclava

Nanny Bans Balaclava
Ermmm...has Nanny lost it completely?

Answers on a postcard please to "Nanny has lost it completely..."

I only ask because it seems that Nanny's "war" on terror has taken a bizarre, and almost hysterical new twist. Nanny's chums in Kent police have taken umbrage against a board game called "War On Terror", and have confiscated it.

For why?

It contains a balaclava...and as we all know, balaclavas can be used to hide one's face which in turn means they can be used by criminals and terrorists.

Brilliant logic isn't it?

The board game was confiscated from climate protesters during a series of raids near Kingsnorth power station, in Kent, the other week.

War on Terror involves creating empires that compete and wage war.

Each player starts as an empire with good intentions, and a determination to liberate the world from terrorists and from each other. Then reality kicks in.

The person designated as a member of "the axis of evil" has to wear a balaclava (included in the game) with the word "Evil" stitched on to it.

Kent police said they had confiscated the game because the balaclava "could be used to conceal someone's identity or could be used in the course of a criminal act".

How bizarre!

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Saturday, August 16, 2008

C**TS of The Week

C**TS of The WeekIt has been a while since I have awarded my prestigious and internationally famous "Prats of The Week" Award, as such I am making another award today but in a special "Uber Prat" category "C**TS of The Week".

Well deserving of this award are those in Newark and Sherwood District Council who seek to prosecute children who play football in the street in Newark.

The Gestapo in the local council have sent letters warning that children face prosecution, and fines of up to £100, if they annoy neighbours with ball games.

The purge against street football (surely street football is far less harmful than street drug dealing, street mugging or street loitering?) is being led by Lynn Pallett the Orwellian named anti-social behaviour co-ordinator.

Whilst I can see that residents who have complained about flowerbeds being trampled by children retrieving balls have reason to be peeved, is it really the right way to go about this to threaten children with prosecution?

Do we really hate children so much in this country that we can't let them act like children once in a while?

Surely it is better that the kids play football than deal drugs, drink or loiter with menaces?

Pauline Heath 73, a mother of ten grown-up children, has a rather sensible view:

"I have 20-odd grandchildren and as long as they don't cause a nuisance, there is no problem with letting them play in the street.

Children should be allowed to be children. I've had lads kick the ball in my front garden. I just go out and tell them that if it happens again I'm happy for them to retrieve it, as long as they close my gate afterwards. I've never had any problems
."

Miss Pallett said that under section 161 of the Highways Act 1980, if a person plays football or any other game on a highway, to the annoyance of a user of the highway, he or she is guilty of an offence and liable to a fine of up to £100.

The police are ready and waiting. A spokesman for Nottinghamshire Police said the force plans to warn offenders in the first instance.

Quote:

"If they failed to move on or persisted to cause a problem, we would then consider arrests."

Are they as proactive about arresting drug dealers and others who cause problems on the streets?

Newark and Sherwood District Council well deserving C**TS of The Week.

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Friday, August 15, 2008

Length Matters

Length Matters
You know how it is sometimes said that "length doesn't matter"? (Not that I have ever heard that myself you understand).

Whilst that may be true for human relations, that is most certainly not the case when dealing with Nanny's local councils and their binmen.

Gordon Morris, from Southwick Wiltshire, found this out to his cost recently when his binmen refused to walk a staggering 18 inches to collect his green waste.

West Wiltshire District Council have issued an edict that states that wheelie bins must be within one metre of the kerb before they are collected. Mr Morris claims that his wheelie bin would block the pavement if he followed the rule. Therefore he places his bin 18 inches away on his driveway.

Herein lies Mr Morris's mistake, he has assumed that Nanny uses common sense.

She doesn't!

The brain dead people who set these rules do not have any ability to think laterally, "out of the box" or act with any form of imagination. The rules must be followed at all times, no matter what the cost.

You can guarantee that if he blocked the pavement with the bin, the council would then have sued him him.

Mr Morris though is not a man to give up, and had a bust up with his council (who in theory work for the council taxpayers). He has now been given "dispensation" to place the bin with only the wheels on the pavement.

Bin crews now only have to walk an extra nine inches to collect the bin!

The council though are not best pleased with his victory, and have warned (as they are a spiteful bunch of c**ts) that his bin was too heavy. They have ordered him to take some of the leaves and twigs out, because they may fall on operatives as it is being emptied onto the van "which was a health and safety issue".

It's a farking joke isn't it?

How dangerous is a leaf?

Mr Morris pays £1800 a year in council tax to be treated like this by petty minded Hitlers and jobsworths.

It is high time for a serious and nationwide council tax payers' strike, and to kick twats like these out of office asap.

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Thursday, August 14, 2008

Spy Hard

Spy Hard
Nanny's Interception of Communications Commissioner (I never knew there was such a person), Sir Paul Kennedy, has come up with a cracking wheeze. He wants local councils to spy on people more, using the Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act (RIPA).

A rather odd request I feel, given that spying requests from councils, police and other officials to phone and internet companies increased from 350,000 in 2006 to more than 500,000 last year.

In fact in June the chairman of the Local Government Association, Sir Simon Milton, wrote to every council in England telling them not to use the law for trivial matters.

Sir Paul doesn't give a stuff about that, he says in his annual report:

"Very few local authorities have used their powers to acquire itemised call records in relation to the investigations which they have conducted.

Indeed, our inspections have shown that, generally, the local authorities could make much more use of communications data as a powerful tool to investigate crime
."

The fact that this law was meant to be used for tracking terrorists, not petty crime and littering etc seems to have escaped him. Another small point that he seems to have missed is that the responsibility for tracking petty criminals etc surely rests with the police, not the local councils?

Doesn't it?

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Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Nanny Bans Cards

Nanny Bans Cards
Those of you who enjoy a quiet game of cards with your friends may soon find Nanny breathing down your neck, in the same way as 14 pensioners who live in sheltered accommodation at Neville Court (Heacham, Norfolk).

It seems that Freebridge Community Housing, the housing association that runs Neville Court, have decreed that cards present a health and safety risk, and as such the game has been banned.

The housing association does not have £2M public liability insurance to cover players who were not residents.

Unless they were prepared to pay an annual premium of £250, on top of the £1.50 they each pay for room hire every week, they were told they would have to stop.

The players used five tables in a small corner of the communal room at a housing scheme of 20 flats at Neville Court, in the village of Heacham, Norfolk. There has not been an accident since the residents and their guests started their game.

However, the group was sent a letter by the housing association saying that the insurance was necessary.

Our old friends in the insurance world trying it on, without anyone ever standing up to them and making them justify their charges.

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Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The Organ Grinder's Monkey

The Organ Grinder's Monkey
In the good old days, long before I graced this planet with my presence, you could not walk down a street in Britain without bumping into a man grinding his organ whilst a monkey gayly (spelling? should it be gayley?) played atop it.

Ah yes, halcyon days!

Sadly, in Nanny's Britain, public organ grinding (the technical term for playing with one's organ) is somewhat frowned upon.

Paddy Cooke discovered this to his cost recently, when he attempted a bit of organ grinding in Ripley recently with his ape "Simon".

Ripley Town Council have banned Mr Cooke from public grinding until a risk assessment is carried out (pass the sick bag someone!).

For your information, Ripley also banned a Punch and Judy show because they worried about the dangers it presented to the public!

What are these people smoking?

Anyhoo, Mr Cooke's act is harmless enough (to those of us who live in the real world); he wears Victorian costume as he walks around playing his organ, a replica of an instrument used more than 150 years ago.

Interestingly Ripley Council claim that they are only acting "under orders", as the requirement for a risk assessment (applicable to clowns, brass bands and the Salvation Army) comes down from Amber Valley Borough Council.

So that's alright then!

By the way, I guess some of you may be thinking that maybe the monkey could escape and bite someone, or that the act may be cruel to the monkey.

At this stage I must point out one wee extra piece of information, "Simon" is in fact an animatronic monkey (it ain't alive!).

Mr Cooke (who has been grinding his organ for 15 years, and has two sons who also grind their organs) expresses it rather wryly:

"It's not as if I have a live monkey which might jump at people.

Mine is a battery-operated interactive toy and the best I have ever had.

He says things like 'I want a banana' and even once offered to tell me the sum of pi squared."

Simon is sometimes quiet and sometimes chatty. He's very realistic but is no danger to anyone.

I suppose someone might trip over a paving slab when listening to the music and blame me but I have been doing this for years without a problem
."

Madness!

Ho hum, it looks as though I will have to continue to grind my organ in the privacy of my own home then!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

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Monday, August 11, 2008

Fire and Brimstone

Fire and BrimstoneIn the "old days", when God was an Englishman who loved to watch cricket, those who attended church could be sure of a robust sermon promising "fire and brimstone" delivered from the pulpit by a crusty old vicar.

However, in Nanny's Britain, such a verbal ear bashing is now rather unlikely.

For why?

Nanny's chums from the local council's health and safety orifice have decreed that the pulpit in the Church of All Saints, in Wyke Regis Weymouth, presents a clear and present danger to the health of the vicar.

The church has been forced to draw up guidelines after being warned by council officials that the pulpit is "dangerous", and that preachers might be injured while climbing its seven spiral stone steps.

In case you are wondering about the safety record of the church, it was built in 1172and the pulpit was added in the 16th century; there have been no recorded injuries to any member of the clergy mounting the pulpit during this time.

One wonders quite how mankind has survived before Nanny's health and safety Gestapo were created!

Notwithstanding the unblemished safety record, Nanny insists that a modern handrail be added to the pulpit.

As an alternative, churchwarden Gary Hepburn drew up his own safety guidelines.

These state that no one under the influence of drink or drugs will be allowed to use the pulpit. The steps shall not be approached in dim lighting, by anyone with poor vision or wearing bifocals, or by anyone feeling unwell.

Those entering or leaving the pulpit are advised to make maximum use of the structure itself, and the stone column supporting it to steady themselves.

You will be pleased to know that the inspectors from the environmental health department of Weymouth and Portland Borough Council have been mollified by these guidelines, Mr Hepburn happens to be a health and safety consultant.

He said:

"The issues were raised when a visit was carried out by council officials on behalf of the Health and Safety Executive. They were looking at the building and its use in relation to the dangers that might be present in a workplace, which is not comparing like with like, in my humble opinion.

The most contentious item was the pulpit and there was no way the church authorities were going to allow a horrible plastic and metal handrail to be installed, so we had to try an alternative tack.

In my professional capacity, I knew the type of things that needed to be said to reassure the inspectors and the way in which they should be expressed.

Fortunately my Safe System Of Work pamphlet was successful and normal service has been resumed – although I must admit even my faith was sorely tested at one stage
."

What a waste of time and money!

Nanny is determined to destroy our cultural heritage, and the fabric of our society.

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Saturday, August 09, 2008

Power - A Failure

Given that we live in a Nanny state, where we are all protected from all forms of risk and threat, how is it Frost Towers is without power this morning?

EDF inform me that they don't know why, and don't know when it will be back.

How the fark am I meant to keep my beer, tonic and other mixers chilled or indeed maintain a stock of firm ice cubes for my tinctures?

Who do I sue?

FYI, this was published using a laptop and piggy backing off soemone else's wifi.

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Friday, August 08, 2008

The Dangers of Hills

The Dangers of Hills
Oh dear, poor old Nanny seems to be getting rather confused in her old age. On the one hand she is exhorting us to take more exercise (eg walk upstairs, go for long walks etc), yet on the other she is worried about the risk involved in walking up slopes.

The good citizens of Booze in Yorkshire (yes it really is called Booze!) have for decades had a decent postal service, whereby Postman Pat has driven/walked up the twisting lane to Booze to deliver the mail.

However, under Nanny's regime the Royal Mail has deemed that the road is too dangerous for its vans and that the postman cannot walk the road because he has a bad back!

The residents must now make a 45 minute drive to the sorting office in Richmond to collect their post.

Royal Mail delivery office manager, Colin Appleby, wrote to residents saying:

"The road is extremely narrow, and if you have to reverse down, this is potentially an accident waiting to happen."

Farmer's wife Hazel Harker, whose family has lived in the hamlet since 1945, is unimpressed:

"I know the road's steep and I know it's narrow, but there are lots of little roads like that. You just have to drive carefully. There have been no accidents on that hill."

A spokesman for Royal Mail said:

"A health and safety assessment was undertaken and the report confirmed that access to a number of premises is a risk to our staff and, as a result, deliveries were suspended."

Pass the sick bag someone!

No one has been injured in the last few decades of mail deliveries.

Maybe the name "Booze" has also put Nanny off?

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Thursday, August 07, 2008

Nanny Bans Photos - Love Croydon

Nanny Bans Photos - Love Croydon
Here is an amusing little tale from my "beloved" hometown of Croydonia (recently voted Chav Town of the Year!), as told to me by a fellow citizen of PRC (People's Republic of Croydonia).

He told me that he walking around Croydon taking photos for a competition, when he was suddenly stopped and searched by three plain clothed policemen enforcing the anti-terrorist act.

Apparently taking photographs is viewed as a suspicious activity, because we are still at threat level severe.

Nice to see, for once, Nanny didn't use the excuse that children might be present!

The competition?

Oh yes, it is called "Love Croydon".

Were it not for the fact that these restrictions are the thin end of a nasty wedge, this would be highly amusing!

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Wednesday, August 06, 2008

21st Century Witchburning

21st Century Witchburning
Nanny's obsession and with paedophiles and her hysterical campaign to heighten parents' feelings of fear for the safety of their children, aided and abetted by a weak and intellectually/morally bankrupt media, are having their desired results on people's behaviour.

Witness this story about a mini riot on a tram in the Croydon area, after a man was spotted allegedly taking a photo inside the tram on his mobile of two children.

The mini riot broke out at Waddon Marsh tram stop when Dimitri Petrov, in his early 20s, was called a paedophile after taking a photo. He was chased on to the track, and was was punched by Terrence Crawford, 18, who broke his jaw.

Crawford pleaded guilty to causing grievous bodily harm at Croydon Crown Court last Friday.

John Gardner, prosecuting, said that Mr Petrov was on a tram travelling from Croydon when it happened.

He said:

"There were a couple of children on board and some passengers seemed to think he had taken a picture of one of them on his mobile.

He later admitted he had taken a picture of a child.

The word 'paedophile' was bandied about
."

A number of youths started to hit him as he was chased off the tram at Waddon Marsh.

Mr Gardener said:

"He found himself still being confronted and he took some form of sanctuary on the rails.

He stood in front of the tram and he started throwing stones at those pursuing him.

Crawford walked towards him and, in a haymaker movement, he punched Mr Petrov in the face.

Mr Petrov fell to the ground, and Crawford also fell over
."

An off-duty police officer who had been on the tram was later able to identify Crawford and he was arrested in March this year.

Errmmm...couldn't he kind tried to intervene earlier to calm things down a bit???

Police had decided there should be no proceedings against Mr Petrov. Crawford will also have to pay £500 compensation to his victim.

Nanny, by whipping the general public up into a state of fear and anxiety, exercises her control over us by making people turn on each other. This is exactly the same way that the church and state used people's fear of witchcraft, in the 16th and 17th centuries, to control the masses.

Nothing changes!

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Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Governmentium

Governmentium
Not my own work, but it tickled my fancy:)

Governmentium

New element discovered


Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years; It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

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Monday, August 04, 2008

A Nation of Suspects

A Nation of Suspects
Nanny's obsession with registering us all on some form of database is not abating.

In her view if she can't do it openly, via her much ridiculed id card scheme, then she will do it by sleight of hand via other more nefarious means. Her solution is elegant and simple.

Prescribed occupations!

These are occupations that, in Nanny's view, will require the volunteer/employee to register on a database for vetting by an Orwellian named "Committee of Public Safety". This committee would have absolute power of veto over anyone attempting to work in the "prescribed occupation".

The government estimate that their plans for this will affect over 11 million people, The Register estimates the figure is over 14 million.

The prescribed occupations cover both formal volunteers (eg anyone working with kids or the vulnerable) and many types employees (eg teachers, school caretakers etc). I would note that the default mechanism (ie mission creep) on many job adverts now is for a CRB check to be performed, therefore the net for prescribed occupations is growing larger.

You have been warned, one way or another Nanny will have her database!

We are all suspects now!

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Saturday, August 02, 2008

Bin Brother - Branch Detectives

Bin Brother - Branch Detectives
Oh dear Nanny really is a confused old witch, on the one hand she keeps pumping up our council taxes (on the pretext of providing us with services) yet on the other she refuses to provide these services if we "infringe" the very smallest of her rules and diktats.

This was the case for Jack Hebblethwaite, 70, from Leeds who recently tried to dispose of a small branch in his garden waste bin (specially designated for the disposal of garden waste).

The council Gestapo ruled that, because it was a staggering 5mm too thick, it was forbidden refuse.

The council then proposed to order a multi-tonne bulk waste carrier to dispose of the 35mm branch.

There's value for money for you!

Local councils really do have our interests at heart, don't they?

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