Nanny's Sugar Tax High

The Commons' Health Committee (consisting of 11 MPs) claims that a tax on sugary drinks should be introduced as part of a "bold and urgent" set of measures to tackle child obesity.

The Committee claims that there was now "compelling evidence" a tax would reduce consumption.Its report also proposes a crackdown on marketing and advertising.

The committee's report said calls for a tax could "no longer be ignored".

Nanny is so desperately short of cash that she will tax anything that moves. In the event she taxes sugary drinks, she will also tax all other foods containing sugar and then move on to other "evil" foods (eg ones that contain fat, starch, cholesterol etc) ie all foods!

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Taking The Piss

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The Past Is Offensive and Should Be Banned

In a remarkable fuss over nothing that can only occur in a university, where seemingly students have too much time on their hands, colleges at the University of Oxford have been drawn into a 'race row' after advertising New Orleans and 1920s-themed balls, to be held in May 2016.

The problem?

According to some students the balls may cause offence to female and ethnic minority students.

For why?

Well, according to the complainers, the 1920's were a time when people of different ethnic origins and women were not largely present in colleges.
 

Magdalen College’s ball, inspired by "The Great Gatsby", promises to take students "back to 1926". It has been marketed using the quote:

"Can’t repeat the past? Why of course you can!"

Arushi Garg, a law student at the college, is quoted by the Telegraph:

"Obviously my demographic (woman of colour from a former colony that remains a developing country) makes me less likely than others to uncritically long for a past that privileged some more than others. 

But it would be nice if they cut down on the nostalgia a bit, because if we were re-living the past, the corridors of institutional spaces like Magdalen/Oxford is definitely not where you would find people of my gender, race and nationality. 

I wrote to the Magdalen organisers and they engaged quite respectfully with me, and are communicating with me to understand why I think this is problematic."

Lincoln college has faced criticism for "cultural appropriation" (what does that mean in English?) due to the marketing around its New Orleans-themed ball.

The co-chairmen of the student union’s Campaign for Racial Awareness and Equality and others have said that it promotes "nostalgia for an era steeped in racism."

As noted, only in a university would you find allegedly intelligent people getting hot under the collar over a fancy dress dance. Whatever era you look at, it would offend someone from somewhere. The present day isn't exactly heaven on earth either!

I am surprised they haven't complained about the word "balls" to describe the dances, given that it clearly has sexist connotations!


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Nanny Argues With Herself Over Health and Safety

The final Lido Nights Christmas charity show, scheduled to be performed in the Saltdean Lido, billed as the “last ever” has been cancelled.


Why?

Health and Safety!

Except that the show had been organised since June, and the outgoing trustees of the Lido claim that all licences, insurances and safety certificates are in place.

Former trustee Ethel Trigg is quoted by Brighton and Hove News:

“Before we handed over the building to the new trustees we had our own Risk Assessment carried out in the presence of Brighton and Hove City Council, and everything was up to standard. The new trustees individual Risk Assessment must obviously be contradictory to ours.”

Organiser Chris Mr Nieto says he offered to pay for any extra insurance, and believes that any health and safety issues raised by the new trustees, such as contractors’ equipment left by fire exits, can easily be overcome.

However,  new chair Cathy Gallagher said:

“We have also been reviewing health and safety matters and carrying out a risk assessment.

There has been an urgency about this as we were being asked to confirm that  the a Lido Night event scheduled for 28 November 2015 would be supported by the trustees.

Unfortunately in the short time available to us we were not able to recommend the event proceed based on the information available to us.

We realise that there will be a disappointment for all of those who were looking forward to the event and we are really sorry about that, but we hope you will understand that health and safety has to be our main priority at any event, no matter what the cause or beneficiary.

As trustees it is fair to say we are risk averse as we consider we have a duty of care to all visitors to the community centre.”

It sounds to me as though the new trustees don't trust the old trustees, wrt their health and safety review, and are using "lack of time" as an excuse to avoid making any effort to go ahead.

Is it any wonder that those of us who live and function in the real world don't respect health and safety "experts"?

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Climate Change Spawned ISIS

Oh dear, whoever is advising HRH Price Charles on what he should/shouldn't say to reporters has clearly fallen asleep at the wheel.

Climate change, whatever royal Nanny says, has not spawned terrorists such as ISIS!

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Farts Cure Cancer

According to research there is now finally one thing that doesn't cause cancer.

Hoozah!

In fact it cures it.

Can you guess what it is children?

Yes, that's right:

Farts!

According to researchers at Exeter University, the smell of flatulence has secret health benefits that could help stave off cancer, strokes, heart attacks and dementia.


Hydrogen sulfide helps protect cells and fight illness.

You now know what to do people!

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Send In The Clowns!

This is what happens when people and Prime Ministers are distracted and bedazzled by clowns!

Are we sure that fraud hasn't been committed in the Kids Company?

Where did the money go????


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Nanny Bans White Cane for Health and Safety Reasons

Nanny has plumbed new depths of stupidity by temporarily banning a seven year old blind schoolgirl from using her white cane in school due to health and safety concerns.

Lily-Grace Hooper was told she could not use her cane at Hambrook Primary School in Winterbourne Down near Bristol.

Lily-Grace has been using the lightweight cane in school since April without issue. However, thanks to a risk assessment (pass the sick bag someone) carried out by the school the cane is now regarded as a risk to others, lest they trip up over it.

The school's "solution" is for Lily-Grace to be guided everywhere she walks by adults, and for her to walk "carefully over all surfaces".

How the fuck does that help her learn to be independent?

The school insist that the measure is temporary.

Head teacher Jo Dent is quoted by the BBC:

"The pupil has not been banned from bringing in their cane, we have simply asked them to not use it around school as a temporary measure until we have the chance to meet with the parent and discuss the situation. 

It was initially hoped we would have this resolved within a day or two.

The school's mobility officer raised health and safety issues around the new cane following a recent risk assessment. 

We have to consider all of our pupils, so it is important that we have an opportunity to discuss the situation before we make any decisions. 

We are very keen to resolve this issue as soon as possible and have been actively seeking to engage with the parent to bring this to an agreeable conclusion."

Okay two things here:

1 What the fuck is a "mobility officer", and why does a school need one?

2 How does meeting with the parents change the situation wrt Lily-Grace being allowed to use the cane? Either the risk assessment is bollocks or it isn't, a discussion cannot change the validity or otherwise of a risk assessment.....or can it? In other words, the school regards the risk assessment as bollocks and needs a means to bin it.
 
Nanny and her risk assessments need to be binned!

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Barney Selfie Alert

Brits told not to take 'storm selfies' as Barney approaches https://t.co/5GhKI6gqAu pic.twitter.com/D27d0qCflh

— Mashable (@mashable) November 17, 2015

Proof that Nanny really does think that we are all slack jaw, dribbling imbeciles!

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Everything Gives You Cancer - Food Nazis Ban Toast and Roast Spuds

The food Nazis are currently having a field day identifying what foods they believe cause cancer. Added to the list of everything that kills us, are crisp roast potatoes and crunchy toast.

A study by the Food Standards Agency (FSA) measured the amount of acrylamide (an alleged cancer-causing toxin) in roast potatoes, chips and toast.

Guess what?

You are all going to die of cancer if you eat any of these foods!

The FSA’s chief scientific adviser said the new research showed the need for roast potatoes and chips to be cooked to only “a light golden colour”, and that bread should be toasted to “the lightest colour acceptable”.

Professor Guy Poppy, the FSA’s Chief Scientific Adviser, is quoted by the Telegraph:

"The risk assessment indicates that at the levels we are exposed to from food, acrylamide could be increasing the risk of cancer.”

Whenever I see the phrase "risk assessment" I instinctively reach for my sickbag.

 

The food Nazis decree the following:

1. Parboil potatoes first before roasting them - considered the best method for producing crispy ‘roasties’ anyway - because the process reduces the free sugars that generate acrylamides
2. Storing potatoes in a cupboard rather than fridge. Low temperatures can increase the amount of sugar and sweetness in the potato , leading to more acrylamide when cooked
3. Cooks should not ‘fluff up’ parboiled potatoes before roasting them because in doing so it increases the surface area which in turn increases levels of acrylamide

As I have noted before, we are all going to die at some point. 

 

The fact that we are living longer than our bodies/brains were designed for, increases the chances that we will develop some form of cancer (which is now used as the "tick box" excuse on the death certificate for a death, in place of the traditional "old age")

Please can these food Nazis just fuck off!

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Dog Shit Night Vision Goggles

Nanny's chums in Stafford Borough Council are so vexed at the amount of dog shit on the streets of Stafford, that they have given staff night vision goggles as a way to stop the ongoing battle against dog fouling.

I kid you not!

Undercover wardens will be equipped with the high-tech £200 devices, in a bid to catch out dog owners who fail to clean up after their pets during the winter months.

The equipment comes with a built in laser illuminator to improve viewing in the dark, and council staff will patrol dog fouling "hot-spots" across the town.

Wardens will be able to spy on residents using covert tactics and issue them with £75 on-the-spot fines if they are caught in the act.

Whilst dog shit is indeed a scourge, I am a tad wary of giving "enforcers" night vision goggles to spy on all and sundry. Aside from being overkill, does it not give rise to privacy concerns amongst the good people of Stafford?


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Hampshire County Council Refuses To Fess Up To High Earners

Council won't say how many staff are on over £100k a year https://t.co/7WjXIRNSS3 pic.twitter.com/9xYzUp9Twz

— Daily Echo (@dailyecho) November 10, 2015

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Ker Farking Ching - The Great Speed Course Con

Last Friday I wrote that police have more than doubled the amount they collect from running speed awareness courses since 2010.

It also appears that police are so keen to sell these courses, that they are conning motorists by failing to make clear how drivers could inadvertently leave themselves uninsured by taking part in them.

The Telegraph reports that insurers have admitted they treat speed awareness courses the same as penalty points, and it is now feared that failing to declare taking part in course could invalidate drivers' policies.

The courses, which cost between £80 and £150, allow drivers to avoid penalty points on their licences. However, campaigners claim that this lulls many motorists into a false sense of security that they do not have to declare the course to insurers, in the hope their premiums will not rocket for a speeding-related offence.

However, insurers usually operate a “catch all” clause in their policies about keeping them informed about factors which may affect your driving, and failing to declare a course could lead them to cancel cover in the event of an accident, experts said.

Ian Belchamber, a campaigner who runs an anti-speed camera campaign in Dorset, said:

“The police’s actions are potentially resulting in people driving uninsured because they haven’t told motorists to tell their insurers about the speed awareness course. 

I would make sure your insurer knows you’ve been on a course regardless of whether they specifically ask for that information. 

If you are involved in an accident and the insurer looks into your history and sees you’ve been on a speeding course they could say ‘You didn’t tell us about this, you’re not covered’.

The police don’t want people to know this because they make a lot of money out of the courses.”

The Telegraph can confirm that two companies set up with close links to the now-defunct Association of Chief Police Officers are now entwined with the organisation’s successor, the National Police Chiefs Council (NPCC).

An NPCC spokesman said Suzette Davenport, the chief constable of Gloucestershire Police, sits on the board of the National Driver Offender Retraining Scheme (NDORS), which registered a £44 million turnover last year for providing safety awareness courses.

A director of NDORS is Meredydd Hughes, the former chief constable of South Yorkshire, who was responsible for road policing at Acpo until he was caught speeding at 90mph in a 60mph zone in 2007, and stepped down from the role.

He is also a director of another company in the sector, Road Safety Support.

Ker Farking Ching!

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Everything Causes Cancer - Frying and BBQ

Adding to the list of things that might kill you, researchers from the University of Texas say that certain cooking techniques, such as frying and barbecuing, may increase the risk of cancer further.

The study, published this week in the journal Cancer, also claims that individuals with specific genetic mutations are more susceptible to the harmful compounds created when cooking at high temperatures.

However, the researchers say they cannot make specific recommendations regarding acceptable amounts of meat intake based on the current study.

The solution?

Either ignore Nanny's hysteria and eat/drink a balanced diet and enjoy your life, or eat dust and be miserable.

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Lard Is Good For You

I was hugely gemused to read that some "experts" have now decided that vegetable oils are dangerous for you (yet another cancer causing product), and that they recommend that we should be using olive oil, butter and lard to cook with as they are healthier.

This is what I have been saying all along!

Martin Grootveld, a professor of bioanalytical chemistry and chemical pathology, said that his research showed “a typical meal of fish and chips”, fried in vegetable oil, contained as much as 100 to 200 times more toxic aldehydes than the safe daily limit set by the World Health Organisation.

In contrast, heating up butter, olive oil and lard in tests produced much lower levels of aldehydes.

How interesting that Nanny's NHS advice is to replace “foods high in saturated fat with lower-fat versions” and warns against frying food in butter or lard, recommending instead corn oil, sunflower oil and rapeseed oil. Saturated fats raise cholesterol levels, increasing the risk of heart disease.

Prof Grootveld, of De Montfort University in Leicester, who carried out a series of experiments, is quoted by the Telegraph:

“For decades, the authorities have been warning us how bad butter and lard was. But we have found butter is very, very good for frying purposes and so is lard.

People have been telling us how healthy polyunsaturates are in corn oil and sunflower oil. But when you start messing around with them, subjecting them to high amounts of energy in the frying pan or the oven, they undergo a complex series of chemical reactions which results in the accumulation of large amounts of toxic compounds.”

What should we conclude form this volte farce in what we should/should not eat?

Simple, Nanny's advice should always be ignored as it is bollocks!

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Ker Farking Ching - Speed Awareness Courses Fund The Police

Following on from yesterday's article about Bedfordshire's Police and Crime Commissioner (Olly Martins) wanting all drivers who travel at more than 70 miles per hour to be fined in order to raise money for the police, the Telegraph reports that police have more than doubled the amount they collect from running speed awareness courses since 2010, despite a warning from ministers to stop raising revenue from speeding offences.

While the money collected from speeding fines goes to the Treasury, police forces are able to keep what they charge for running speed awareness courses, around £100 a time.

The vast majority of motorists prefer this option over a fine, because they avoid having points added to their licence and thereby keep their insurance premiums down.

In recent years, there has been a huge increase in the number of people attending such courses, as forces across the country recognise the financial benefits. In 2010 the number of people attending National Speed Awareness courses was 447,724, but by last year that figure had more than doubled to 1.19 million.

Ker Farking Ching!

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Ker Farking Ching - Speeding Fines Used To Raise Revenue

As loyal readers know, Nanny and her chums love to use fines as means of raising revenues.

Hence it should come as no surprise at all to learn that Nanny's chum, in the form of Bedfordshire's Police and Crime Commissioner (Olly Martins), wants all drivers who travel at more than 70 miles per hour to be fined.

Olly proposes turning on speed cameras permanently across stretches of the M1 motorway network, catching everyone who exceeded the limit.

Motorists would then be forced to pay a £100 fine as well as having points added to their licence, or could opt instead to attend a speed awareness course, costing £90.

Is this concern about speeding driven (pardon the pun) by a desire to improve road safety?

Is it fark! 

It is in fact being used as a means of raising millions of pounds in revenue for the police.

Olly is quoted by the Telegraph: 

“If motorists do not like it then they can always stick to the speed limit.”

The catch all phrase of those who are blind to reality, and who use the law to drive their own personal agendas.

Olly claims that he had been forced into suggesting the scheme, because his force was at financial breaking point and fining speeding drivers could help Bedfordshire retain 25 officers it would otherwise be forced to lose.

It will raise £1M!

When the police, council or government use fines as a means of raising revenue to pay for themselves the concept of impartial law enforcement, innocent until proven guilty and commonsense fairness is thrown out of the window.

The police will now be incentivised to use other means of raising revenue, and for new laws to to be passed that people can break and be fined for!

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Everything Causes Cancer!

As loyal readers know, the World Health Organisation (WHO) recently added processed meats to its list of ‘known’ carcinogens.

Here, courtesy of the Spectator, here is list of a few of the other things which have been claimed to be linked to cancer in the past fortnight:

• Make-up in Halloween outfits (blamed by a laser surgery centre in New York)
• Chocolate (blamed by a colorectal surgeon at St George’s Hospital, Tooting)
• Deodorants (tabloid article — no source given)
• Hormone-replacement therapy (tabloid article — no source given)
• ‘Roundup’ herbicide (named in US lawsuit)
• Sand used in fracking, which is to say, sand (Friends of the Earth)
• Nail polish (tabloid article — no source given)
• Shampoo (US gynaecologist)

In other words, if we look hard enough everything we eat, drink and come into contact with can increase the chances of some people developing cancer.

However, is not the reality that we are simply living much longer than we were designed to?

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Sugar Sugar - Brighton Council Hates Sugar

Are you Sugar Smart? Find out about our #sugarsmartcity debate & fill out the survey to win prizes at https://t.co/IIynJx7mmc #Brighton

— BrightonHoveCouncil (@BrightonHoveCC) October 29, 2015

Those of you who want to give Brighton coumncil (worshippers of Saint Jamie of Oliver) your views on the "dangers", or otherwise, of sugar should complete the survey via the above link.

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Supporting Theresa May

At the end of each day I send Theresa May a copy of all my internet browsing history. Everyone should do the same.

— Carl Maxim (@carlmaxim) November 2, 2015

With all this data (raw unprocessed information) being gathered (eg Project Stellar Wind) I wonder how Nanny will have the time or resources to process it into meaningful information that will enable her to protect us?

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