Swine Flu

I see that our media are really getting worked up over this swine flu "epidemic", so much so in fact that they have stopped placing the "financial meltdown" at the top of the headlines.

I also see that Nanny, in order to be seen to be doing something, has now decided to send every household in the UK a leaflet explaining what to do.



Here is my advice (I am not a doctor), but it is common sense which you should already be doing anyway:

1 Don't waste your money on those masks, they don't work.

2 Wash your hands regularly and thoroughly (something that staff in some of Nanny's hospitals seem to have lost the habit of); especially when coming back inside the house, having handled money, before food and after a loo visit.

3 Eat properly.

4 Avoid touching your eyes, nose or mouth with your hands (or indeed any other organ of your body).

5 Don't live, eat, or sleep with pigs.

6 Continue to enjoy roast pork and pork sausages.

7 Avoid having sex with human beings and pigs.

That's it in a nutshell. I am now going to have a couple of Wall's finest!

BTW, now is a good time to buy hog futures, as when the swine flu "epidemic" turns out to be a storm in a teacup they will rebound.

Please do remember though, I am an accountant not a doctor:)

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BBC Twats

Oh dear, such is the stupidity of this Nannyism that the perpetrators are destined to be awarded my ultra prestigious "Prats of The Week" Award - Twats of The Week.

Our old friends from Auntie (the BBC) have put themselves up for this award as a result of their recent actions, or rather "inactions", wrt changing a wheel.

Under normal circumstances it takes one person to change the wheel of a car. However, under Auntie's strict health and safety guidelines it takes:

- Two presenters
- Their producer
- A car mechanic
- A first aid expert
- A paramedic

Plus a few procedures, namely a risk assessment and a ream of health and safety forms.



In theory all that was required for the BBC Radio Essex show "Big Skill" (29 March) was that the two presenters change the wheel...unfortunately once Nanny had stuck her oar in, all of the above bells and whistles were required.

Big Skill?

I don't think so!

Nice to see our licence fees are being well utilised!

The BBC, well deserving Twats of The Week!

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The Dangers of Flags

I see that St George's Day last week was not able to pass without some Nannyism.

Liverpool Council (much "respected" by the residents of Liverpool) decided to remove St George's flags erected (can I say "erected"?) across the main road of Walton.

Seemingly the council was worried that they might fly off and obscure the windscreens of passing cars. Nanny's chums on the council sent out a workman in a truck with a cherry-picker to take all the flags down, accompanied by policemen in an unmarked van.

Nice to see that during times of economic crisis the council is still happy to waste taxpayers' money on a piffling health and safety "issue".

I am pleased to say that Nanny and the council got a sound kicking from the citizens of Liverpool, hundreds of whom inundated local radio stations with phone calls to complain.

The council was forced to reattach many of the flags.

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Odious!

Not content with taking children into care, Nanny has now started snatching elderly people as well.

This story, reproduced in full from The Telegraph, highlights the plight of Betty Figg the 86 year old mother of Rosalind Figg. Betty was snatched from her daughter's home by Nanny's social services and police, just two days after Rosalind took her mother out of a care home in order to better look after her at home.

Whether the care home was providing better care than Rosalind could do is one issue. However, the manner of Nanny's snatch and grab raid was odious to say the least. Police arrived with a battering ram, and Betty was taken out in a distressed state in a wheelchair with a blanket over her head.

Would Nanny care to explain to us how she thinks that this snatch and grab raid, and the manner in which it was performed, was in the best interests of an 86 year old woman?

This is, to my view, one of the most odious actions that Nanny has taken that has ever been reported on this site.

Here is the article in full:

"Rosalind Figg had removed her 86-year-old mother Betty, who has dementia, from the care home she had lived in since August.

She hoped to look after her at her own house in Coventry and spent months adapting it for her needs, creating a downstairs bedroom complete with an alarm that would go off if she got up in the night and wheelchair ramps outside.

However as The Daily Telegraph reported, just two days after bringing her home on Saturday, social services backed up by police officers with a battering ram took her back to the care home over fears that her daughter would not be able to support her adequately.

Mrs Figg was taken from her daughter's house in a wheelchair and is now back in her room at Butts Croft House, which costs her family £2,000 a month.

Her daughter, 55, will visit solicitors to find out what her legal rights are and find out how she can bring her mother home again.

She said: "I haven't had any contact with the council since this happened and I am still determined to bring my mother home."

Miss Figg insisted she did not regret her decision to remove her mother from the care home.

She said: "She was sitting there like a cabbage, there was no interaction and she wasn't doing anything.

"You could see in two days living with me how much better she was."

Staff at the care home in Corley, Coventry, refused to comment and its owner was unavailable.

Its registered directors are Dr Koneru Prasad, 59, and his wife Dr Usha Koneru , 52.

The married couple are also GPs at a surgery in Peterborough, and run a charity, called Heal, that provides medical care to poor children in India.

Colin Green, director of community services at Coventry City Council, said the local authority, in conjunction with the University Hospitals Coventry and Warwickshire NHS Trust, invoked its powers under the Mental Health Act to obtain a warrant to take Mrs Figg back into care.

Social services decided she needed to be in a specialist home because they were concerned that the high level of care she required might not be met by her daughter and her partner.

He said: "If someone needs caring for 24 hours a day, seven days a week, we have to look at what additional support is there and whether one person can realistically offer that level of care.

"There is a lot of personal care management as well as the dispensation of often complex medication.

"We were never satisfied that it was in Mrs Figg's best interests to live with her daughter."

He said Butts Croft was a "very good care home" and said the appointment of an independent advocate for Mrs Figg would ensure that her needs and her desire where to live would be fully catered for.

He added that Mrs Figg's situation would continue to be assessed, adding: "We certainly hope there would be continued dialogue with the family."

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Happy St George's Day!

Happy St George's Day everyone!

As we take today to celebrate being English, we can also take a little time to digest yesterday's budget.

A remarkable piece of engineering by Darling and Brown, based on the fantasy that growth will shoot back to 3.5% by 2011. They did what every amateur schoolboy physicist does, make the results fit the theory.

Regrettably for us, living in the real world, growth will not hit 3.5% in 2011 and Darling's "budget" will fall apart.

Aside from the fact that Treasury forecasts are always bollocks, even if they were for once accurate we find ourselves facing a debt of £1 Trillion.

Yes, read that figure again, £1 Trillion!



Given that we are now facing the worst economic situation in living memory, thanks to Brown's debt boom and unwillingness to put something away for a rainy day during the boom times, Nanny's expenditure will have to be cut.

Factoid: I warned about this in July 2003 "The Road To Nowhere - The Delusion of the Burgeoning Public Sector"

The question is will she cut areas that genuinely add no value; eg diversity awareness roles, non jobs in local councils, spin departments, government misinformation films on smoking/eating/boozing, the ego massaging Olympics etc?

This financial disaster, brought to us by ZaNuLabour, does offer an opportunity to roll back the frontiers of the state.

However, the short term effects will be very unpleasant, as all those people who have had their livelihoods paid for by Nanny start to experience the real world. We can expect some very unpleasant confrontations in the coming months, as the reality hits home.

Happy St George's Day!

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Prats of The Week - Brighton and Hove Council

Aha nice to see that my own local council, Brighton and Hove, have earned themselves one of my renowned and internationally desired "Prats of The Week" awards.

Anton Cataldo a local artist recently lost a couple of his paintings, and decided to ask the public to help him find them.

His method?

He pinned some simple notices (similar to "lost cat/dog" notices) to a few trees (six to be precise), to make a direct appeal to the public.

Can you guess what happened next?

Yes, that's right, the local council contacted him and fined him £75.

Kerching!!!

For why?

Seemingly the notices were deemed by the prats in our local council as harmful to the trees!

Here is part of the text of the council's email sent to Mr Cataldo, were it not serious I would have assumed it was just taking the piss:

"Some of these posters had been stapled to trees. You appear to have little understanding that trees are living things.

Wounding the bark of a tree in any way can lead to attack by airborne fungal spores which, in the worst-case scenario, could lead to the loss of the tree."

Needless to say, once Mr Cataldo made a public fuss over the issue, the prats in the council cancelled the fine.

Treemendous!

(The above joke is copyright to the Ken Frost).

Wasting all that time, effort and our taxes on an irrelevancy proves how out of touch and useless local councils really are.

As I have noted before on this site, when dealing with local councils intent on screwing you out of as much money as possible, the only way to deal with them is to stand up to them and create as much fuss as possible.

They are a waste of space and resources.

Brighton and Hove council, well deserving Prats of The Week.

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