"Rolling Back The Frontiers of The State" - Not!

Oh dear I see that our "Roll Back The Frontiers of The State" government has decided to award local authorities extra funds if they can demonstrate that they have improved our health by tackling air pollution, domestic violence and truancy etc.

Andrew Lansley, Nanny's Health Secretary, will announce that data on over 60 factors that influence health will be collected.

Councils will be expected to boost rates of breastfeeding, tackle school attendance, homelessness, tooth decay and the numbers of young people in the criminal justice system etc.

Lansley is of the view:

“We all want to be healthy. No one wants an unhealthy existence. And the job of the Government – and my responsibility – is to help people live healthier lives."

The question, whenever Nanny is involved, is when does "helping" become "enforcing"?

Anyhoo, rest assured this plan will go tits up:

1 Councils will manipulate data to ensure they win more money.

2 It will be used as an excuse by councils to intrude ever more into our lives, and to collect more information about us.

3 It will cost more than it saves.

4 It will be used by councils to promote whatever "harebrained scheme" single issue agendas they have.

In short, it will benefit us not one jot!

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Abstinence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

Ugh I see that the cretinous element of the Tory party (ie Nadine Dorries) is seeking to involve the state in the sex lives of teenagers.

Dorries has proposed a bill that would require schools to offer girls between the ages of 13 and 16 lessons on the "benefits of abstinence" from sex.

Dorries herself though seems happy enough to not abstain from sex with family friends (In January 2011, Dorries stated that, since December 2010, she had been in a relationship with John Butler, a married man who had been a family friend for 13 years previously and whom, she claimed, had separated from his wife shortly before.)

Here's why her bill is bollocks:

1 MPs are the last people on the planet who should lecture others about morals and sex.

2 Should not boys also be given these lessons? Why are only girls being targeted?

3 Telling a teenager to abstain form sex is as productive as trying to herd cats. Teenagers are hormonally programmed to bonk. A far better use of time and resources would be to ensure that the teenagers are fully cognisant about contraception, stds and the costs (financial and emotional) of having a baby at a young age.

Moralistic preaching about abstinence will fail, and will turn the teenagers off from listening to relevant advice about contraception etc etc. It will of course also make sex even more exciting, as it will be "forbidden".

Why is this cretinous woman an elected representative for fark's sake?


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Educashun - The GCSE In Skydiving

I am glad to see that reports about Nanny's educashun system making exams easier have been proven to be incorrect.

That at least is the conclusion one "might" draw from the fact that Sian Spence (15) is taking the first ever GCSE to include indoor skydiving, after the WJEC exam board agreed to assess her hobby as part of the PE course.

Skydiving will account for 66% of her PE marks.

The exam board is now trying to work out how to asses her.

Hmm, let's see how this all pans out then!

Personally speaking I am in favour of introducing the ancient Chinese civil service exam, whereby candidates were locked in a room for 24 hours with all the paper and ink they needed and were told to write down everything they knew.

Now that's an exam that separates the "men from the boys"!

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The Joy Of Vegetables

I am gemused to see that Euro Nanny has chosen to lecture us about our fruit and vegetable eating habits.

Seemingly, if "scientific research" (carried out by the European Food Information Council - EUFIC) is to be believed, the average Brit does not eat enough vegetables. In fact Euro Nanny places us 14th in a league table of 19 vegetable eating EU nations.

Britons eat 258g  of fruit and vegetables a day, compared with a European average of 386g.

EUFIC then go on to bemoan the fact that we are placing ourselves at a greater risk of caner, diabetes and all the other modern plagues that Nanny likes to frighten us with.

So, should we be worried?

Errmm..no not at all, for you see EUFIC then go on to admit that there are a few problems with the data that it used for its "research":

1 The definition of fruit and vegetables varies between countries, eg some nations do not include potatoes or fruit juice.

2 EUFIC used data from various governments to compile its report, therefore the data itself cannot be comparable or necessarily reliable.

In other words the "research" is bollocks.

Given the above caveat, why precisely did they bother to conduct the "research" and publish their "findings" in the first place?

Another fine example of Nanny using dodgy "research" to justify her prejudices and policies!

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Taking The Piss

Oh dear I see that Aberystwyth and Newcastle researchers have come up with a "dip stick" test for urine, that shows what and how much you have eaten.

They call it a "lie diet-tector," allegedly it will become a vital tool for identifying the causes of disease.

I dread to think what Nanny will try to do with this.

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Prats of The Week - Lincolnshire County Council

Ooh Err Missus, 'tis a bright and cheerful Monday morning and time once again for me to award my prestigious and internationally renowned "Prats of The Week" Award.

This week it goes to Lincolnshire County Council.

For why?

Their batty plan to replace the "wait for the green man" signs on pelican crossings in Boston, with a "non sexist" sign that asks pedestrian to "cross with the green figure".

Why?

Seemingly the use of the word "man" is deemed to be sexist as it implies male domination over when people can and can't cross the road.

Sigh!!!

What a spectacularly idiotic waste of money!

Lincolnshire County Council, well deserving Prats of The Week!

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