Screen Five Year Olds For Coordination Problems

It seems that as a result of certain issues, eg the reduction in time spent playing outside and crap parenting, large numbers of children nowadays apparently have lousy physical coordination (eg they cannot sit still, stand upright or hold a pencil).

Sally Goddard Blythe, director of the Institute for Neuro-Physiological Psychology in Chester, said that all infants should be given physical checks at the age of five, because large numbers of children with basic developmental problems were “slipping through the net”.

Fair enough, maybe.

However, once a problem has been identified what exactly will Nanny do to correct it?

Is this not an issue that the parents should be addressing?

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You Are A Fat Bastard!

Oh dear Nanny really can't stop from interfering in our lives, yet again she is fretting that we are a nation of fat bastards.

Thus Nanny intends to issue fat bastard warnings on till receipts, as and when we buy products that she doesn't approve of.

The plans are currently being developed by Nanny's chums from Public Health England, which apparently works on ways to improve the nation’s health and deal with inequalities. Errmm, I thought we have an NHS that is meant to deal with health matters, why do we need a quango doubtless subsidised by the taxpayer?

Duncan Selbie, the Public Health England’s chief executive, said the warnings on till receipts were a way of using behavioural techniques to nudge people towards choosing more healthy eating outcomes.

He is quoted by the Telegraph:

“We need to find four or five big corporates that are relevant to people – so Sainsbury’s, Tesco, Lidl have millions of people on their databases – to reach people.

So let’s say I went to Tesco on Sunday and I got a till receipt and it said I bought various things, and it said you’ve saved £2.21. I think Sainsbury’s do the same thing.”

Selbie said that Public Health England was considering giving supermarkets its algorithms or mathematical codes for working out sugar and fat content in people's shopping baskets.

“What if we gave Sainsbury’s the algorithms that they could personalise to their customer database, so they give their customer base advice about how they could improve their health?

It doesn’t have to cost customers anything more, but it may help them make choices that are better for their health.”

Doubtless Nanny will start accessing the supermarkets' databases in order to "help" her design these algorithms.

I have a simple message for Nanny:

Fuck Off!

We are fed up with you sticking your nose into our lives.

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Knobheadery

As loyal readers know I have written several times about the daft rule introduced last year by Nanny, that forbids parents to take their kids out of school during term time, lest they be punished by a fine and possible criminal record.

As I have noted, when was a wee nipper it was a simple matter of common sense and a discussion between the parents and the school as to whether it would be permitted.

However, under the iron rod of Nanny (can I say "rod" before the watershed?), common sense has long since been abandoned. Sadly there is yet another case of absolute buffoonery caused by Nanny's daft rule, as Maxine Ingrouille-Kidd has found to her and her son's cost.

Ms Ingrouille-Kidd has been threatened with a fine of up to £120 and possible prosecution if she takes her son Curtis (13, who is a blind quadriplegic and has cerebral palsy) out of school during term time.

Doctors have given Curtis a few years to live, and warned he may only survive until his late teens.

Ms Ingrouille-Kidd is quoted by the Telegraph:

“My son is 14 in October and this may well be his last holiday.

I asked for a holiday request form and was absolutely flabbergasted and shocked when the response was ‘no’.”

Unsurprisingly, following media pressure and a campaign on Facebook, Somerset Council has now said it would speak to the school regarding the case.

It is quite ridiculous that this issue has arisen in the first place, common sense dictates that this should be a simple matter of a discussion between the school and the parents.

It is knobheadery in the extreme!

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The Heroism Bill

Chris Grayling, the Justice Secretary, is putting forward a bill before Parliament today entitled "Social Action, Responsibility and Heroism Bill".

Grayling is of the view that that society has become “too inclined to blame someone else”, and wants to (as per the Telegraph) "slay the health and safety culture".

The Bill will protect people from being sued if something goes wrong when they try help in an emergency. It is also intended to give teachers confidence that they will not face legal action if they have taken reasonable safety steps when organising a school trip.

Grayling said:

“This is a Bill that’s out to try and slay the health and safety culture.

It is about trying to restore common sense to the kind of situations which happen all too often and very seldom get to court - where somebody has an accident at work, it’s entirely their own fault, they have got a perfectly responsible employer who has the normal health and safety procedures in place but that person does something dumb, hurts themselves and sues the employer anyway. 

For responsible small businesses it is a real headache and most of the time they just pay up because it is less hassle to do so. This is meant to be a big message to them because if you do the right thing, we are making sure that the balance of the law is in your favour.”

I wish him well, if the Bill  does what he claims it will do. However, it is "ironic" to say the least that legislation has to be used to restore "common sense".

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Booze Makes You Forget

I see that Nanny is having another pop at people who drink. This time she is trying to scare middle aged people into reducing their alcohol consumption, lest they be stricken with Alzheimer's.

New draft guidance from the National Institute of Health and Care Excellence (Nice) wants lifestyle advice to be included in NHS health checks currently offered to all patients aged between 40 and 74.

It says middle-aged patients should be warned that “there is no safe level of alcohol consumption” when it comes to their future dementia risk.

That of course is the most absurd piece of advice ever, as by definition it means that Nice want you to stop drinking completely. Hence no one will follow their advice, and ignore everything else they say as well.

Well done Nice, another botched piece of advice!

Draft recommendations also propose an expansion of “smoke-free” policies to ban smoking in parks, in order to reduce the risk of dementia.

Please, get a grip, how the fark is second hand smoke in a park going to increase someone's chances of suffering from dementia?

The more dodgy research and absurd advice Nanny inflicts upon us, the more we ignore it!

The only way to get Nanny out of our lives is to drink more, so that we can forget her.

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Heatwave II

Are we all surviving the heatwave?

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Nanny's Heatwave Curfew

A couple of days of warmish weather and Nanny, as per usual, has gone into hyperventilation mode and issued a series of heatwave alerts and curfews.

We are instructed, if we live in the South East, East and Midlands, to keep out of the sun between 11am and 3pm.

We are also advised to turn off non-essential lights and electrical equipment, to avoid generating excess heat, and wear a hat or light scarf if venturing outdoors.

Public Health England said people should keep curtains closed, move to a cooler room to sleep, and should eat salad, drink plenty of water and avoid extreme physical exertion.

Schools have been advised to monitor overweight children and encourage youngsters to play in the shade. They have also been asked to avoid leaving computers and printers on standby mode.

Oh and if your Muslim and fasting during Ramadan, Nanny is fearful that you have no idea how to cope with heat.

Dr Paul Cosford, of Public Health England, is quoted in the Telegraph:

“While many people enjoy hot weather, high temperatures can be dangerous, especially for people who may be particularly vulnerable, such as older people, young children and those with serious illnesses. 

Many members of the Muslim community may be fasting during the current period of Ramadan. During hot weather it’s important to balance food and fluid intake between fasts and especially to drink enough water.” 

I am old enough to remember the drought and heatwave of 1976, we didn't have any of this bollocks then and managed to live through it!

For those of you who can't make it to the beach today, here is a picture of Brighton Beach.

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Criminal Family Holiday

As I noted recently, Nanny now takes a dim view of parents taking their kids out of school for a short break during term time.

In my day it was a simple matter of a commonsense discussion between parents and teachers as to whether this could be allowed. Anyhoo, moving forward to the present day and Nanny has forbidden it.

My commiserations to the parents (unidentified to protect their children) who took their kids on holiday during term time.

Can you guess what happened next children?

Yes, that's right, they were put on trial at Nuneaton Magistrates Court and given conditional discharges (12 and 10 months respectively).

What does this mean?

It means they have a criminal record!

Absolutely potty!

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