Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Monday, September 01, 2014

Fatty Fatty Task Force

Oh dear, Nanny's chums in the medical profession are stressing themselves out again about how fat we have all become.

In an open letter to the chief medical officer for England, Prof Dame Sally Davies, the Royal College of General Practitioners and 11 other organisations say "an entire generation is being destroyed by a diet of junk food and sugary drinks".

They want an action group, made up of doctors, nurses, dieticians, dentists and schools, to be set up urgently. The want better co-ordination of obesity treatment services so that all children can be encouraged to eat healthily from a young age.

They also call for a raft of other measures, including:
  • increased support for the National Child Measurement Programme
  • improved investment in IT programmes for weight management
  • more training in malnutrition and obesity for GPs and other health professionals
  • outreach projects to educate families about the dangers of obesity
The letter's signatories recommend setting up a national Child Obesity Action Group to tackle the problem.

All of this would be all very well if it were not for the fact that we are already bombarded with information, advice and lectures from all manner of sources about how fat we are and how we should eat properly.

The reality is that some people really don't give a monkey's about their food intake and "lifestyle" (wrt exercise etc), short of enforcing exercise and rationing certain types of food Nanny is never going to change these people.

I have no doubt that some of Nanny's chums would love to directly intervene and enforce mandatory exercise and rationing (eg via "fat" taxes). The trouble is, the rest of us who are not obese and who are capable of leading a balanced lifestyle (wrt eating, drinking and exercise) will end up suffering from Nanny's interference.

In the not too distant future the global price of food staples (grains etc) will rise (due to an increase in demand from Asia Pacific and other developing areas). Thus the obesity issue in the West will be taken care of by the laws of supply and demand, as people will be forced to eat more healthily and cook more for themselves in order to make ends meet. Nanny doesn't need to distort the market, nature will take its own course and resolve the issue.

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Friday, August 29, 2014

Nanny Bans Vacuums and Other Devices

Euro Nanny is on the warpath again, this time she has fixed her gimlet eye upon the humble vacuum cleaner; and has decreed that as from 1 September vacuums with motors in excess of 1,600 watts will be banned.

For why?

Apparently, if you believe Nanny's dodgy science, these products contribute to climate change.

Euro Nanny will require vacuum cleaners to be sold with a new system of labels, which will show their cleaning performance and requires a minimum level of performance.

However, these labels will be bollocks; because they are self regulating (ie the manufacturers create them and test them etc).

Once she has banned powerful suckers, Euro Nanny will also be banning high wattage hair driers and kettles.

Why not just go the whole hog, and initiate mandatory power cuts everyday?

Let's face it Euro Nanny would really love to do that, given her dictatorial ambitions!

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Thursday, August 28, 2014

Nanny Bans E Fags


Oh dear, not content with trying to ban the smoking of fags indoors, Nanny (in the form of WHO) is trying to ban the use of e fags indoors as well.

For why?

WHO claims that the fumes are marginally toxic to bystanders.

Pish posh!

Short of using an e fag with a plastic bag over your head I doubt that these devices are anymore dangerous than aerosols or car fumes (sorry car fumes are way more dangerous, but WHO don't seem to be doing anything about banning cars!).

In fact, even the anti smoking lobby thinks that WHO is talking bollocks. Hazel Cheeseman, director of policy and research at Action on Smoking and Health, in the Telegraph said there was "no evidence of any harm to bystanders from use of these devices".

The WHO report is another example of bollocks science, used by single issue fetishists to support their political agenda.

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Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Nanny Hates Fags - But Loves Money

As loyal readers know, Nanny absolutely hates fags and does her level best to stop us smoking.

However, not all in Nanny's garden is as rosy or as clear cut as that. Ladies and Gentlemen I present HM Treasury's open consultation on Minimum Excise Tax.

In brief Nanny is worried that we are smoking less, and that when we do smoke we are smoking cheaper stuff (eg roll ups).

For why is she worried?

The less we smoke, and the cheaper we smoke, the less tax revenue she raises!

AHA!

The solution?

A minimum excise tax that would increase Nanny's profits from our smoking. The document then goes on to explain how that would work, and how much extra revenue it would generate.

Hypocrisy?

Nanny?

Never!

One amusing point though, despite the document covering all manner of fag type matters (eg roll ups and counterfeits etc), it fails to mention the effect on the market of e fags. Rather a serious omission I would say!

Anyhoo, those of you who want to help Nanny out of a financial hole should do the decent thing and start smoking 20 cigars a day; for Queen and country!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

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Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

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Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Nanny's Heart Attack on a Plate

I was gemused, and heartened, to read that at least one of Nanny's hospitals still allows people (staff, patients and visitors etc) a degree of choice wrt what they can purchase to eat within its confines.

Ninewells Hospital in Dundee, where doctors treat stroke and heart attack victims, has within its boundary an establishment that sells a “fry-up” pie (a pie with bacon, sausage, black pudding and beans, with an egg on top) for £1.50.

Unsurprisingly, one of Nanny's chums (Prof Mike Lean, former government adviser, and chair of human nutrition at Glasgow University) wants it banned because he regards it as a heart attack on a plate.

Maybe so, if one ate these pies everyday. However, as an occasional indulgence it will do no more harm than stuffing many other types of food down the gullet. Additionally, given how depressing hospitals are, the hapless patients/visitors/staff need something comforting to eat once in a while.

Professor Lean hates it, and is quoted by the Telegraph:
It should never be anywhere near a hospital. It is laden with fat, salt and without a vegetable in sight. There should be strict guidelines for all food sold in hospitals.” 
It is not compulsory to buy one, and there is ample choice of fruit and low fat foods within the walls of the hospital.

We should be allowed some freedom of choice!

FYI, Professor Lean is wrong about a pie being a heart attack on a plate. The photo at the beginning of this article is of one of my Saturday night fry ups (accompanied by Red Stripe and bread and butter), that I indulge in every so often (now that's a heart attack on a plate!); I haven't keeled over yet!
 
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, August 22, 2014

Nanny Bans Brighton Station Piano


In February of this year I wrote a cynical piece about a proposal by Peter Kyle (prospective Labour candidate for Hove) to install a piano in Brighton station.

I noted that commuters would be better pleased with an improvement to services etc.

However, time moved on and a piano was indeed installed. I was proved wrong and commuters, it seems, really rather enjoyed tinkling the ivories etc.

Sadly Nanny, in the shape of Brighton station bosses, has now decided that the piano isn't quite right.

For why?

This I find to be rather odd because it's a farking railway station in one of Britain's leading seaside resorts, does Nanny not know that the station is rather farking noisy anyway?

Methinks the decision is more to do with the crap, and widely ridiculed, queuing system that was created when new ticket machines were installed.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Auntie Vexed Over Tattoo Discrimination


Oh dear I see that Auntie has got herself into a tizzy over tattoos and people's prejudices about them.

In a very lengthy and worthy article, Auntie asks if anti tattoo discrimination should be illegal.

In a perfect universe mankind would not have any prejudices at all, and we could all worship what we wanted, wear what we like etc.

However, in the real world like it or not people (both consciously and subconsciously) form judgements of others based on appearances, behaviour etc etc. Whilst some of these prejudices have been legislated against, it is nigh on impossible to legislate against every form of prejudice as there are simply too many of them.

Given the current state of the world, surely Auntie has more important things to fret about than tattoos?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Prats of The Week - Sainsburys

Congratulations to a Sainsbury's store in Holborn, that thrust itself into the maelstrom of the Middle Eastern conflict on Saturday.

Fearing an attack by anti Israeli protesters, the store manager removed all the kosher products.
Colin Appleby, a customer was quoted by the Telegraph claiming that a staff member defended the decision, saying:
"We support Free Gaza."
All very well, maybe....except not all kosher products come from Israel; indeed many in that store were from Poland.

The removal of kosher products therefore does not target Israel, but targets people of the Jewish faith (who doubtless have a broad spectrum of views about what is happening in Gaza at the moment).

Were Sainsbury's to follow through on its own "logic" and "moral" stand, it would also presumably remove all Halal food as a protest against ISIS.

Suffice to say, once this nonsense appeared on Facebook, Sainsbury's backtracked and put the food back up on the shelves.

A spokesman for Sainsbury's said:
"It was an isolated decision made by in a very challenging situation. It was chilled food and he was simply trying to preserve it.

It was the manager's decision there and then – not company policy at all. A decision was taken by a store manager faced with a challenging situation outside the store.
Prats!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries