Nanny Bans Bacon and Booze

Nanny's chums from The World Cancer Research Fund (WRCF) have conducted a study into cancer and have determined that, if we follow a strict no booze no bacon diet, then we can live to a ripe old age and feel thoroughly miserable.

For good measure WRCF say that all sugary drinks should also be shunned, people should “stick to water” as part of efforts to cut their risk by up to 40%.

They have issued a 10 point plan (diktat) that Nanny will doubtless try to enforce.

Cutting cancer risks | 10 recommendations

1. Be a healthy weight. Keep your weight within the healthy range and avoid weight gain in adult life
2. Be physically active. Be physically active as part of everyday life – walk more and sit less
3. Eat a diet rich in wholegrains, vegetables, fruit and beans. Make wholegrains, vegetables, fruit, and pulses (legumes) such as beans and lentils a major part of your usual daily diet
4. Limit consumption of ‘fast foods’ and other processed foods high in fat, starches or sugars. Limiting these foods helps control calorie intake and maintain a healthy weight
5. Limit consumption of red and processed meat. Eat no more than moderate amounts of red meat, such as beef, pork and lamb. Eat little, if any, processed meat
6. Limit consumption of sugar-sweetened drinks. Drink mostly water and unsweetened drinks
7. Limit alcohol consumption. For cancer prevention, it’s best not to drink alcohol
8. Do not use supplements for cancer prevention. Aim to meet nutritional needs through diet alone
9. For mothers: breastfeed your baby, if you can. Breastfeeding is good for both mother and baby
10. After a cancer diagnosis: follow our recommendations, if you can. Check with your health professional what is right for you.

I for one will do exactly what I have always done when it conmes to Nanny's advice, ignore it.

The more strident and restrictive her advice, the less likely people are going to follow it!

There is absolutely no point living to a ripe old age, if you are going to have to live a life of misery to get to that old age.

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Reality Check - If You Are Bright Enough You Will Get In!

Do a Twitter search for "Oxford my college" to find people who are eager for you to know that (a) they are concerned about this story and (b) they went to Oxford University. https://t.co/AE4VTGzLtj

— Christopher Snowdon (@cjsnowdon) May 23, 2018

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Childhood Obesity Figures Are Bollocks!

As per Christopher Snowdon:

"I argued last month that Britain’s childhood obesity statistics are worthless. They are based on an unjustifiable assumption about the scale of child obesity in 1990 and that error has plagued every subsequent measurement. A flawed methodology has led to the number of obese children being greatly exaggerated.

I suggested that the true number is less than half that suggested by the official statistics. We are told that one in five children are obese by the time they leave primary school. I believe that the true figure is closer to one in twenty and I have the evidence to back me up.

To recap, the normal body mass index (BMI) cut-off of 30+ does not work for children so we have to improvise. The current British system defines children as obese if they have a BMI that would have put them in the heaviest five per cent of their age group in 1990.

Were five per cent of children obese in 1990? No. How many children were obese in 1990? We don’t know, but we do know that barely one per cent of 18 year olds were obese and we know that obesity tends to increase with age, so it seems certain that fewer than two per cent of children were obese in 1990."

Nanny's figures are bollocks.

The reason that she still uses them is because they suit her purposes, and they enable her to bully people!

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Question for Nicola Sturgeon

Given that you and St Jamie of Oliver are so keen to stop Scottish people enjoying "two for one " and discount deals on pizzas etc, will you also be banning GroupOn from offering a discount deal on meals at St Jamie's?

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Scottish Nanny Bans Two For One Pizzas

Scotland, the land that gave the world deep fried Mars bars and deep fried pizza in batter, is to face a major culinary upheaval.

Nicola Sturgeon has met St Jamie of Oliver, and he has told her to ban two for one deals on pizzas etc.

This is kind of ironic, given that St Jamie has happily told the press that he lets his kids eat burgers etc at home and that his recipes contain high levels of sugar, fat and salt.


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Nanny Ivy Bans Flaming Sambucas

Eva and I dined in the recently opened Ivy in Brighton on Friday, nice meal etc (a review of which can be seen here).

However, on ordering some flaming Sambucas (the flaming process helps the coffee beans add their flavour) I was told that they could not be flamed.

For why?

Health and safety!

Which was kind of ironic, given that one of the Ivy's special desserts is flambéed!

Anyhoo, I did attempt to ignite them myself with Eva's cigarette lighter but failed dismally, which was probably just as well as I understand from Eva that the bar staff were looking alarmed that I might succeed.

The Ivy is the only restaurant I have ever been to, thusfar, where Sambucas won't be flamed due to health and safety.

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Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries