Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Friday, October 19, 2018

Nanny Bans "Mansize" Tissues



Kleenex is scrapping "Mansize" branding from its tissue boxes after 60 years on the shelves as consumers called it out for being sexist. 

The company said the tissues would now be called "Extra Large".

What utter fuckwittery!

However, since Nanny is on the lookout for "sexist" names etc here are some that should be banned as per Liz Kershaw:

- Woman's Hours

-Woman's Own

-Woman's Weekly etc

Feel free to add your own!

Utter crap!

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Thursday, October 18, 2018

Nanny Bans Dangerous Dahlias



Nanny has donned her jackboots again and have ordered a couple to remove a bed of dahlias from in front of their house because they are a ‘danger’ to drivers.

Brian and Sally Williams have been tending to the dahlias and shrubs on the narrow Hollin House Lane in Loxley, near Sheffield, for the last 28 years. They originally planted the blooms to encourage wildlife and bring colour to the area.

However, Sheffield council have sent them a letter telling them they have just a week to remove them or pay for it to be done by the authority. P

The couple’s daughter, Elizabeth Williams, said they were ‘absolutely devastated’ and that the flowers had been the only thing that helped her father through ill health.

Sheffield council told the BBC:
We have sympathy with the nearby homeowner who has attempted to stop cars driving over the highway verge on what is a very narrow, single-track lane. 

Unfortunately the placing of flower beds, as well as stones and water barrels, on the highway outside the property, could be a danger to other road users."
Why take action now, after 28 years?

One single anonymous complaint!

The Metro reports that neighbours have set up a petition to get the council to change their mind and it already has more than 3,000 signatures.

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Wednesday, October 17, 2018

Childrens' Remembrance Parade Ditched, Lest They Be Cold and Hungry



Saltash's annual Remembrance Day Parade has hit some turbulence after the mayor decided to stop it lest the children taking part were cold and hungry.

Councillor John Brady (ironically an ex serviceman) said there was already plenty happening to honour the military on the day already, and noted that the service had had been timed for 2pm to accommodate youngsters taking part in a planned pebble laying event commemorating the First World War earlier in the day.

Cllr Brady said any parade would have had to be squeezed in late afternoon - which wouldn't have been fair on families and asked why a parade had not been planned, he is quoted by the Telegraph:
"Lots of events are going on during the day.

We have to take into consideration the children that will be out for most of the day there will be lots of children around it could be a very long and cold day."
Why not simply schedule the parade for the morning, and ditch the pebble laying?

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Monday, October 15, 2018

Minimum Pricing Causes Increase In Boozing!


Splendid!


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Friday, October 12, 2018

Nanny's Calorie Cap



It seems that Nanny is now abandoning any pretence that we have a right to choose what and how much we eat, as she proposes to introduce a mandatory calorie cap on food.

The fascists in Public Health England insist that pizzas must shrink or lose their toppings, and pies, ready meals and sandwiches will also be subject to the new proposed calorie limits.


Under the draft proposals, a standard pizza for one should contain no more than 928 calories - far less than many sold by takeaways, restaurants and shops.  And the recommendations suggest that a savoury pie should contain no more than 695 calories.

Public Health England (PHE) said “drastic” measures were needed to combat Britain’s obesity crisis.

Dr Alison Tedstone, PHE chief nutritionist, told the Telegraph:
It could mean less meat on a pizza, it could mean less cheese, it could mean a smaller size. Consumers are saying they want smaller portions and healthier options.

We know that just having healthy options on the menu won’t change the nation’s habits - we need the default option to have fewer calories. The default options for pizzas are margherita and pepperoni pizzas, so we need them to get healthier.
Here's why this is bollocks:

1 It's not the state's business how much shit we eat or drink, we are all going to die one way or another; let us choose the manner of our death!

2  Consumers have the right to choose the size of pizza, pie etc and then (if they are full) leave some of it for a doggy bag.

3 Restaurants and takeaways will simply flout this nonsense by offering two "government regulation mini" pizzas for the price of one.

All in all this is a disgrace, Nanny should "go away"!

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Thursday, October 11, 2018

Nanny Wants Us To Hate Fat People

Once she's done with the fat people, she will train us to hate drinkers, smokers and those who eat the "wrong" sort of food!

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True Brit!


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Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, October 10, 2018

Nanny's Boozing Bollocks



As loyal readers know, Nanny has being doing her best to vilify alcohol and those who drink it. This is kind of ironic given how much booze politicians, health professionals and the "socialist pretending" middle classes put away!

Anyhoo, the ONS has published a report on the boozing habits of adults in the UK in 2017:
  • In Great Britain, 57.0% of Opinions and Lifestyle Survey respondents aged 16 years and over in 2017 drank alcohol, which equates to 29.2 million people in the population.
  • Young people aged 16 to 24 years in Great Britain are less likely to drink than any other age group; when they do drink, consumption on their heaviest drinking day tends to be higher than other ages.
  • 20.4% of survey respondents reported that they did not drink alcohol at all.
Disregarding the fact that people's memories and responses are highly "suspect", when it comes to surveys such as this, it is noteworthy to see that the percentage of  16-24 years olds who claim to be teetotal has risen from 19% in 2005 to 22.8% in 2017.

Needless to say Nanny and her tame media are quick to ignore this:

1 Nanny keeps banging on about increasing the number of "nudge" campaigns and health awareness projects targeting young drinkers.

2 The Times happily reports that a "third of under 25s now drink now alcohol (22.8% is not a third!).

In other words, whatever the reality, Nanny and her lackeys will continue to force her narrative and poisonous views down our throats!

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Tuesday, October 09, 2018

Obesity Cure


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Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, October 05, 2018

BBC Scotland Indulges In Some Fuckwittery


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Thursday, October 04, 2018

Scottish Nanny Bans Then Unbans Poppadoms



Scottish Nanny has, as per usual, made something of a fool of herself.

Scottish Nanny, fearful of the alleged obesity of her subjects, had decided that free poppadoms and prawn crackers (often accompany takeaways) would be banned.

24 hours later, having been justifiably ridiculed by all and sundry, Scottish Nanny has backtracked and the SNP has said that free traditional extras with Chinese and Indian meals, which are often included if a customer spends above a set amount, would not be under threat as part of its anti-obesity strategy.

Prats!

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Wednesday, October 03, 2018

Nanny Loves Avocados


My sympathies to the good people of Costa Coffee, who have unwittingly annoyed the avocado eating classes.

Nanny's chums from ASA have banned an advert for Costa Coffee, which urged customers to buy a bacon roll rather than avocados.

The radio ad featured a voiceover which said there was "a great deal on ripen-at-home avocados" but they will only "be ready to eat for about 10 minutes then they'll go off".

The voice told people to choose the "better deal" of a roll or egg muffin.

A grand total of TWO listeners (who evidently do not have a life) complained that the ad, which aired in June, discouraged people from opting for fresh fruit.

The advertising watchdog agreed with the complaints and upheld them.

Costa said their ad played on the "frustration and unpredictability of the avocado".

The chain claimed it was not suggesting that listeners must choose between the two breakfast options, but that it was instead telling people about their promotional offer.

ASA said:
"We considered that, although the ad was light-hearted, it nevertheless suggested avocados were a poor breakfast choice, and that a bacon roll or egg muffin would be a better alternative, and in doing so discouraged the selection of avocados."
I am surprised that Nanny is so fond of avocados, given their high saturated fat and calorie content!

As I noted in January, an avocado contains more calories than a can of coke!

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Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

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Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, October 02, 2018

Middle Class Drugs Crackdown


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

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Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

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Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries