It was to be expected, I suppose, that Nanny would finally set her gimlet eye upon the cultural icon of Britain...the bagpipes.The pipes that have been used in war and peace over the centuries, to promote Britain and its interests throughout the world, have now been deemed by Nanny chums in Brussels to be a health and safety hazard.
Pipers must now adhere to strict volume limits, or run the risk of breaking European Union health and safety laws. Pipe bands have been ordered to tone down or wear earplugs to limit noise exposure to 85 decibels.
A pipe band played at full volume peaks at 122 decibels outdoors, noisier than the sound of either a nightclub or a chainsaw, which rises to 116 decibels.
The last time there was a pipe ban was after the Jacobite rising of 1745, and the defeat of Bonnie Prince Charlie's clansmen at the battle of Culloden.
The rules, part of the control of noise at work regulations introduced by the Health and Safety Executive (HSE) following a Brussels directive, are of course bollocks.
You cannot play the pipes quietly!
An HSE spokesman said:
"If an employer discovers an employee has been exposed above the exposure defined in the regulations they must take action."
I find the use of the word "must" by Nanny's troglodytes to be offensive.
Pass the sick bag someone!
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