The Dangers of Chests

My thanks to the good people of IKEA for their "clear", "easy to follow" and risk averse instructions booklet showing me how to assemble a chest of drawers.

I was particularly grateful for the pictogram warning that advised me against using the completed chest of drawers as a staircase/ladder (by pulling the drawers out to form a staircase).

Good risk averse advice indeed!

However, why on earth would I want to use the chest of drawers as a staircase/ladder in the first place?

Oh, and if anyone is wondering, I didn't complete a risk assessment before assembling the product and, owing to the absence of a hammer, used a log of wood to bang in the nails.

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Nanny Bans Stairs

Here is a rather daft example of Nannyism from my beloved home town of Croydon.

I pooped into the bar of our local theatre (The Warehouse) the other day, it has been a couple of years since I had a drink in there, and saw that the upstairs bar had been closed down a while ago.

For why?

Aha, can you guess?

Yes, that's right, our old "friend" health and safety!

It seems that the health and safety officers of our council have deemed that the stairs were too steep, and they banned the stairs (the only access point to the rather cosy upstairs bar) from being used; hence the bar had to be closed at some expense.

Now here are a couple of points that kind of make that judgement look daft:

1 The stairs have been used for the last 20 years, without any form of injury

2 If the stairs were not so steep, how the hell would they reach the next floor?

Farking stupid!

However, as you can see from my fight with Croydon council over the arena project, Croydon council wanted The Warehouse shut down anyway. I suspect that this was one of their nasty little tricks to try to shut the place down.

Fortunately the council failed on both counts!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

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