I assume that on reading the above title, you would naturally think that I had imbibed a tad too much of "falling down water".
However, I can confirm that this is not the case.
Nanny's chums in health and safety have cast their beady little eyes on the activities of a Gloucestershire firm of meals on wheels, which provides pensioners' meals.
The hapless company had tried to do a good deed, by providing free of charge paper napkins to their customers. These napkins would have safety information printed on them, such as; warnings about thieves and bogus traders.
However, Nanny is having none of this; only she is allowed to issue safety warnings.
The matter was raised at a meeting of the "crime and disorder reduction partnership", and duly huffed and puffed about.
Nanny banned the company from issuing napkins.
The old folks might eat them...Obvious really isn't it?
The pensioners it seems were not impressed by this piece of Nanny nonsense; and insisted that they were capable of eating their meals without eating the napkins, or for that matter, the cutlery.
Unfortunately Nanny was having none of this, the napkins it seems were put through a rigorous risk assessment before being unleashed on the public at large.
Oddly enough, and how unsurprising, the napkins passed the risk assessment (no doubt conducted at great cost to the taxpayer); they are now freely available in the public domain.
Maybe this problem could have been avoided if the napkins had been printed with a warning:
DO NOT EAT THE NAPKINS