Nanny Bans Bin Liner

As we all know, Nanny is really cracking down on Muslim extremists; thought crime is going to be made an offence, beards will be banned and Mecca bingo sites will be closed until further notice.

In addition to the above, Nanny has also started to consider banning the actual terrorists themselves.

Now there's an innovation!

As such, Nanny was particularly perturbed when she heard reports that Osama Bin Liner was actually on holiday in Britain.

The reports said that Mr Bin Liner has been taking the sea air, along with Nanny's old chum Saddam Hussein, at Broadstairs.

Nanny did not waste anytime, and promptly banned them.

Unfortunately, as is the case with most of Nanny's actions, she did not bother to check the facts. It turns out that Osama and Saddam were in fact puppets, being used by a seaside Punch and Judy show (something that Nanny doesn't approve of either) to wrestle with Mr Punch for his sausages.

Well, facts have never got in the way of Nanny carrying our some daft idea of hers.

Poor old Professor Brent de Witt, owner of the show, was told that he could not use the figures by Nanny's chums in Thanet district council.

It seems that, in the spirit of Nanny's Britain, some underhand scum bags went to the council and informed on the good Professor.

That is the ugly new face of Britain these days; intolerance, no sense of humour and a nation of informers.

Thank you so much Nanny!