As we know, Nanny's "educashun system" and her "wipe your arse" approach to self responsibility has created a nation of morons.
My thanks therefore to a loyal reader of my HMRC site who, within a comment about an article I wrote, included the following examples of how moronic as a nation we have become:
"I stopped at Mc Donalds and ordered some fries.
The girl behind the counter said would you like some fries with that?
One day I was walking down the beach with
some friends when someone shouted....
'Look at that dead bird!'
Someone looked up at the sky and said...'where?'
They walk among us!"
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Yes, I have seen many examples of how dumbed down our society has become however, the thing that annoys me more at the moment, is the number of adults, including grown men, that come onto our TVs and cry......Where is their pride?
ReplyDeleteI also get annoyed by the use of "Prat speak" examples of which include;-
Doing everything we can,
Ticking all the boxes,
Working together,
Celebrating diversity,
Enviromentally friendly,
Climate change
Arghhhhhhhhhhhh....I'm getting wound up just writing them down!
I quite agree with you Tonk! I would add to your list, 'your call is important to us' as used by various call centres. No it's not! If it were important, they wouldn't keep people waiting for 20minutes, half an hour or more, listening to inane music, with an irritating voice every minute or so informing us that all their operators are busy!
ReplyDeleteAnonymous, as a fellow anonymous, I feel I must correct you on what is truly an important mistake in your post.
ReplyDeletePeople do not pronounce it "Strictly", they pronounce it "Strickly"
*takes some time to remove his tongue from his cheek*
Thank you for correcting my error.
ReplyDeleteIf any BASTARD was to say ‘strickly’ to me they would end up with my fist in their stupid face.
I would like to get hold of one of these retards, rub them all over with a cheese grater, soak them in vinegar and then jab them ‘repeatdly’ with a pitch-fork.
I shall go and have a lie down now.
I witnessed a shop assistant who could not add up 2x99p.
ReplyDeleteAlso overheard
customer " Can you check I got those 2 for £1 each "
checkout operator " You got the two of them for £1.97"
customer "I got them for £1 each then?"
checkout operator "They were less than £1 each"
I've calmed down now....Some more;-
ReplyDeleteRandomly inserting the word "like" in to sentences......"I was like upset and I said like I'm bothered....."
People that keep saying seemples (simples) because they've watched an advert with some daft meercats puppets in it.
Using the word "challenge" to describe anything difficult or anything that requires a bit of effort or thought.
People that have never contributed but still insist on saying; "I'm entitled."
Newsreaders that say;
"The BBC/Sky News, ITV have learned."
I'm sure there are more.....I'm off to calm down again!
"Randomly inserting the word "like" in to sentences......"I was like upset and I said like I'm bothered....."
ReplyDeleteThat encompasses most people under the age of 25...
@Tonk - I robustly agree - lessons must be learned.
ReplyDelete"Here is tomorrows weather from the Meat-illogical Office - today was fine and dry..."
ReplyDeleteWithin the last couple of years, someone on here mentioned the strange language and sentence construction used by members of the emergency services,(it may have been Microdave but I'm not sure) since then, I have listened carefully to the Hi-Viz clad spokesmen and have several phrases that annoy; The building was well alight......Surely the building is alight or it's not?
ReplyDelete"Come forward so that you can be eliminated from our enquiries.".....As long as you don't mind being banged up for five hours until they can be bothered to interview you and of course, they then still have your DNA and prints in their database.
May I add my personal dislikes:
ReplyDelete1. Excessive use of the word "absolutely".
2. Incorrect usage of "me" and "I".
3. Incorrect usage of "complimentary" and "complementary".
4. Incorrect use of the plural form rather than singular of Latin words, i.e. "bacteria" when it should be "bacterium".
5. People why can't say "deteriorate" but say "deteriate".
I know, I know - I ordered a black coffee & was asked "do you want milk, or cream with that?" Neither - I want it black. It was served with a small jug of milk! ffs.
ReplyDeleteBefore news reports;
ReplyDeleteThis report contains scenes some people may find upsetting.
This report contains flash photography.
"Moving forward" = the professional (with a small 'p') equivalent of 'innit';
ReplyDelete"They were sat" when it SHOULD be "They were sitting"
With nothing else to read I looked at a Sleb Goss Mag and saw that Kate and Pippa Middlton were referred to as K-Middy and P-Middy :)
Oh, God, I'm turning into Miss Jean Brodie :>
Jay