Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Friday, November 10, 2006

The Firework Code

The Firework CodeAs you all know, we have recently celebrated Guy Fawkes night here in Nanny's Britain. Despite Nanny's attempts to stamp this out, it still seems to be going strong (even if some have to resort to "virtual bonfires", because of health and safety concerns).

However, as much as I am anti Nanny, I must raise an official complaint about a shortcoming in the "Firework Code". This is a simple list of do's and don'ts that try to help people avoid injury when using fireworks eg:

"Don't throw fireworks"

Regrettably Nanny has failed, this year, to make the list suitably "idiot proof". It seems that a 22 year old man had to be carted off to hospital for severe burns.

Why?

He was at a fireworks party in Sunderland, dropped his trousers and attempted to launch a rocket from his own backside!

Seemingly the rocket (a Black Cat Thunderbolt Rocket) got stuck, as it were, and then exploded "in situ"...er..so to speak.

The man is suffering from, unsurprisingly, burnt arse syndrome.

He will make a full recovery.

So there you go folks, Nanny let herself down this year by not including the following in the Firework Code:

"Do not attempt to launch rockets from your own arse"

That being said, no matter how many rules and regulations you have you will never be able to fully protect the moronic and stupid from themselves.

10 comments:

  1. Anonymous1:18 PM

    Ken,

    Would it be fair to say that this "Guy" was a complete arsehole?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous1:18 PM

    Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently determined fool.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous3:03 PM

    ahh someone else following the jackass
    training video.The world would be a very boring place with out people like these.

    ReplyDelete
  4. To top it off he should sue the manufacturer for not putting a warning on the rocket.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Has guy falkes finnished?where i live its all year round, it never stops ,we even have them for Christmas,all hours of the day and night,what are these halfwits celebrating?thier power to keep us all awake?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous7:49 PM

    Surely, Darwinism in action...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous8:28 PM

    Bag said...
    "To top it off he should sue the manufacturer for not putting a warning on the rocket."

    It says that they guy used a "Black Cat Thunderbolt Rocket", I’m from the U.S.A. and used thoughts things. They actually do have a warning on them, at least over here. I can't remember it word for word, but its along the lines of not to it light near your body and to run once it is lighten, along with the bit about adult supervision. Given the regulations you poor people go through I'd be supprised if your own fireworks don't have warnings that cover the whole lable.

    LitlePepito@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous11:32 AM

    Talking of blowing one's arse off, you don't need a firework.

    The ancient and noble art of lighting one's farts is also very risky. There have been instances of flashback resulting in a small explosion inside the rectum. Makes one's eyes water just thinking about it.

    Needless to say this is not conducive to continuing good health for the person concerned. So we obviously need a law preventing shopkeepers from selling boxes of matches together with tins of baked beans.

    I'm joking, Nanny! Honest!

    Pete

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous11:00 AM

    I NO THIS LAD BUT IF ANY 1 NO'S HOW TA DOWNLOAD THIS VIDEO OF HIM CAN THEY LET ME NO BY E-MAILIN ME AT MACKEMMADDOG@HOTMAIL.CO.UK

    ReplyDelete
  10. I say the chap should have been nominated for a Darwin award, as carrying on like that he is going to get one one day

    ReplyDelete