Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Booze Matters - Supermarkets Want Their Cut


Nanny, as we know, has long hated the working classes (people who don't live in Islington, non Guardian readers and who buy food based on what they can afford rather than overpriced trendy organic shit).

She hates the fact that the working classes (allegedly) drink more, eat more unhealthy stuff, and smoke more than the rest of the population. Nanny also really hates the fact that the working classes are more willing to stick the finger to Nanny and her minions.

Well now, it would appear that Nanny is broadening her perspective and spewing forth her bile at the middle class as well.

In yet another media headline grabbing attempt, some tedious part of the NHS (NHS Information Centre) has warned that the middle classes are now drinking more than the working classes.

Also, for good measure, Nanny warns that married couples are also more likely to drink more often than singletons.

Seemingly sales of wine have increased more than that of any other type of alcohol over the last two decades, up by more than 50% since 1992.

Are "working class" people not allowed to drink wine then?

Why does this mean that "middle class" people alone are drinking wine?

Nanny warns that more than 10 million people are drinking at hazardous levels.

That would include our "beloved" MPs and members of the medical profession (who are no mean slouches themselves when it comes to downing a few, in between a few puffs on a fag and a couple of lines of Bolivian marching powder).

Needless to say, health "experts" are using these "findings" to call for a minimum price for a unit of alcohol.

Golly gosh, hot into the fray comes Sir Terry Leahy, the chief executive of Tesco, who is also calling for...can you guess?...yes, that's right...a minimum price on alcohol.

Could that call be possibly connected to the fact that he wants to increase his profit margins?

No one is stopping him from raising the price of booze in his stores now, if he is really so concerned about our health.

Ah, but wait a minute, that would mean that he would lose market share. Far better he gets the government to legislate allowing him and his competitors to form a government backed price fixing cartel (which is actually not allowed under current laws).

In the event that the prices are raised, given Nanny's statement that the middle classes are in fact the ones drinking more, how exactly will raised prices lower the rate of drinking amongst the middle classes (whom we assume can more likely afford the increase)?

Have we not, until recently, been bombarded with shite from Nanny telling us that drink is responsible for all crime in Britain?

After all after a few drinks we all have the urge to go out and beat someone senseless, don't we?

Are we to assume from these anti middle class findings that it is in fact the drunken middle classes who are responsible for all crime in the UK?

Are married people more likely to be drunken criminals, rather than singletons?

It seems to me that Nanny is very selective when it comes to presenting and using the "facts" that claims to have "researched".

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  1. Would a minimum price on alcohol also increase the VAT take?
    I assume there is VAT on booze and therefore, a tax (vat) on a tax(duty)
    I suppose the supermarkets would also make more profit and thus pay more tax on that profit.....Oh I get it, it's nothing to do with health, its all about raising revenue.

    Incidently, Tesco does appear to be Nanny's prefered grocer in my opinion, she does seem to follow every diktat with glee, often, as in checking ID, adding their own little extra rule to Nanny's....What good yes sheep they are, Nanny will reward them no doubt.

  2. Mr Kipling11:07 AM

    Seeing as obesity apparently costs the NHS billions of pounds a year too, shouldn’t there also be a minimum Price for cakes?

    I think that would be an exceedingly good idea.

  3. You are quite right Ken. All Tesco want to do is raise their profits, but cant do it alone as folk would just shop elswhere.
    If the government said ok then but you must keep your prices the same, we will just add a tax on top, would they be as enthusiastic then. I doubt it.

    As it happens, Tesco were advertising 3 cases of booze for £20 on Tuesday evening.

    Bloody hypocites

  4. Hippo Cities?
    Sorry, I meant hypocrites.

  5. "Are we to assume from these anti middle class findings that it is in fact the drunken middle classes who are responsible for all crime in the UK?"

    Of course. Who do you think it is that steals all the post-it-notes from the stationary cupboard?


  6. Number 62:55 PM

    I am a qualified alcohol counsellor. When running a clinic at the local GP, all the docs did the BMA severity of alcohol test for a laugh. They grinningly stated that all four of them would have to book in to see me. Mind you, I scored on the top end too.

    Booze is a universal lubricant. Just get tough on the drunken chavs who run riot on it every weekend but then nanny does not like to go after people who tell her minions to go fuck themselves before giving them a good kicking. Best to targe the law abiding by making their alcohol 'units' consumed a crime to be taxed for their own good of course.

  7. Speenzman5:04 PM

    I know, why doesn't the government ban fatty foods, smoking and drinking entirely, in fact everything that enables people to relax and unwind, a huge Nanny version of prohibition if you like...

    and then see how much crime there is!