Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Nanny Bans Birds
I see that Nanny is a tad concerned about the health and safety threat posed to us by our feathered friends and their droppings.
Nanny's chums at North Devon Council have come up with a "terrific wheeze" on how to solve the problems and threat of bird droppings on the street near St Peter's church Barnstaple.
Can you guess what Nanny is doing?
Yes, that's right, the council has ordered the trees and foliage to be cut down (note, they gave no forewarning of what they were going to do).
For why is the council so worried about the birds (starlings)?
The council is of the view that the starlings' droppings were potentially poisonous, and could contain salmonella and toxoplasmosis, bacteria which can cause food poisoning.
Maybe so, but often do people go round licking bird shit off the street?
Oh one other small point, the problem would resolve itself when the starlings migrate in March!
Councils are not only the enemies of the people, but also of life on this planet!
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If they don’t have a problem with destroying the habitat of what they consider to be pests, then the general public should have the same rights.
ReplyDeleteLet’s go and blow up all the council buildings in North Devon, preferably when the entire council ‘workforce’ is inside.
Wokingham is the capital of silly bird stories....
ReplyDeleteSome years ago, Wokingham council removed all the nice paving slabs/sets from the town centre. These were replaced with block paving. Many buildings in the town had many pigeons living about them. These birds crapped on the new block paving and, when it rained, this new paving became as slippery as an ice rink.
The council then got a man to fly a falcon inorder to drive the pigeons off. The council then decided that this was too expensive so they decided to broadcast bird seed in the town center are, laced with a pigeon contraceptive. We pay for this out of our council tax......You couldn't make it up!
I have never seen anyone eat bird shit however, I am concerned with the proverbial shit Nanny is dropping on us all from a great height -
ReplyDeleteI thought that trees were considered sacrosanct by the green lobby, and chopping them down was a heinous crime? Why not get rid of the real parasites, politiciams and council 'officers'?
ReplyDeleteKen - I'm shocked (Nay, appalled) that you forgot to mention the Councils 'reserve excuse' - clearing these (20-30ft high) shrubs would prevent 'Anti-Social Behavourists' from congregating in the area.
ReplyDeleteNothing indicates that these undesirables had suffered from higher-than-expected levels of 'toxoplasmosis (won't anyone think of the Kiddies) &c - despite the frequent & severe risks they had been exposed to.
LOL:)
DeleteI saw that "excuse", but considered it so ridiculous that if I added it to the article it would detract credibility from the piece.:)
As it's the 1st March, I'll put on my Conspiracy-theorists tinfoil hat and suggest that there's a hidden agenda here. Have you noticed how many Councils are mutilating trees, and some time later, cutting them down because they're suddenly deemed to be an eyesore? This has recently happened in Woking, and my old home town, and in parts of London. It may just be coincidence, but it seems to be happening rather a lot.
ReplyDeleteAnd as Tonk says, bird contraceptive seems to be the order of the day in Woking too - I wondered which kind soul had scattered so much bird food in January..