Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Monday, October 17, 2005

Nanny Bans Bond

Nanny Bans BondThe new James Bond has been selected, it will be Daniel Craig. The media report that Craig will give Bond a darker edge.

However, Nanny couldn't let something as important as the new Bond go by without sticking her nose in.

It seems that Nanny has forbidden Bond from smoking in his next film, this despite the fact that Ian Flemming's character smoked 70 a day.

Nanny is worried that the sight of Bond smoking may set a bad example to people.

However, the good news is that Bond will still be able to kill people in a variety of imaginative and violent ways.

A tad hypocritical don't you think?

4 comments:

  1. Anonymous10:16 AM

    I could be wrong, but I don't think I've seen Bond personally light up in a movie since the days of Sean Connery. Plenty of 'offer the henchman a light to distract him before punching his lights out' ploys, but no actual smoking action.

    I'd love to see a 70-a-day Bond wheeze his way through the average 007 blockbuster, but they seem to be veering away from the humorous elements. Another classic example of New Labour legislation to fight a non-existent problem.

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  2. Nanny must have had a fit when watching Sunday nights ITV drama 'Jericho' then. Almost every character was portrayed smoking at some point, even down to the duty sergeant at the police station walking into an interrogation room with cigarette in hand. Maybe this series is the media equivalent of two fingers to Nanny as not only was there excessive smoking but the hero of the piece rather liked his Scotch too and at one point the three main detectives were reeling through the streets of Soho in rather a state. Nice to see some reality in TV :)

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  3. I recall that in the novel Thunderball, when Bond trains for his assualt on the island fortress of Mr. Big, he stops drinking and cuts down on cigarettes, but not much!

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  4. Anonymous2:41 PM

    Bond has certainly sparked up over the course of the series, but mostly cigars, e.g. think of Mr. Brosnan at the beach bar in Cuba in Die Another Day just about to observe the divine Ms. Berry rise from the sea - with a big old stogey in hand (not a euphemism, though it could well be).

    However, in what way could Nanny ban Bond from lighting up? The rights are owned by some consortium of MGM, Sony and Eon and the movie will be fully funded by the private sector (albeit perhaps with some tax incentives to shoot at Pinewood or Elstree). The BBFC have recently updated their guidelines (due to public demand - yeah, right) to take exception to smoking scenes in films aimed at a younger audience and hence there might be an opportunity for Nanny to leverage her censorship department to impose a higher certificate than normal (with potential revenue impact).

    Having said that it's all too easy to imagine the hordes of interfering busybodies, beaurocrats and single-issue fanatics crowding out a compliant media marketplace with their incessant moaning, wailing, lecturing, hectoring and haranguing on the next Bond film's release if he, or any of his co-stars, so much as dares to look at a cigarette.

    Or, indeed, treat a woman with anything other than total respect while practicing safe sex. Or, indeed, enjoy a particularly fine vodka martini, brandy, whisky or any alcoholic drink. Or, indeed, dine on anything that isn't low-fat, low-salt, organic, fair trade and free range. Or, indeed, use violence to resolve a situation. Or, indeed, etc., etc., etc.

    Who needs Blofeld or Scaramanga these days?

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