Educashun

Congratulations to David Smith, Nanny's headmaster at Darfield Upperwood Primary School, who proved his value for money by paying cash to his wife and son, going on holiday courtesy of the taxpayer and authorising overtime payments and consultancy fees for himself.

On one trip to London he even bought a suit for himself and his deputy with taxpayers' money.

Nanny's chums in Barnsley council published a report on his conduct, and council chiefs took him "very seriously to task" and expressed their "extreme displeasure".

However, the good news is Smith kept his job; because his motives were "totally honourable".

Such honourable actions included:

• A trip to Salzburg in Austria by Mr Smith and his deputy, to "find out how foreign schools teach foreign languages", cost £2,625, including £1,276 on 'bed and breakfast accommodation' and £270 on taxi fares to and from Stansted airport.



• In May 2003, 16 members of staff attended a 'training event' over three days at the four-star De Vere Belton Woods Hotel in Grantham, Lincolnshire.



• Mr Smith claimed £6,150, which he authorised himself, out of the £9,780 paid for overtime on Beacon projects over three years.

It was only taxpayers' money though.