It is nice to know that Nanny's educashun system, so prized in presenting us with 100% pass rates, is now recognised by those in higher education as producing illiterates.
It seems that British students are struggling to win places at university because of competition from European applicants, who have "better English".
Malcolm Grant, the provost of University College London, said that the reputation of higher education in Britain made it a beacon for highly qualified English-speaking students from across Europe, including those from the European Union's new member states.
Speaking at a seminar organised by the think-tank Politeia, Professor Grant said admission tutors were offering places to highly motivated French, German and east European students.
"Often, people who have studied a foreign language formally are better at it."
To make matters worse, EU students must repay the £3,000 a year top-up fees when their annual earnings exceed £15,000. However, Nanny has not yet worked out how to keep tabs on their salaries.