I have been writing articles for this site since September 2004 and, on occasions, one can be a tad "sensitised" to the nonsense of Nanny and not react with the full vigour, righteous indignation and ire that this old witch should provoke.
However, fear not, in this particular case my indignation is righteous, my ire is inflamed and my dander is up.
So incensed am I about this, that I am forgoing my prestigious "Prats of The Week" award and presenting the miscreants with my "Knobheads of The Year" award.
What has caused such a response in my normally mild mannered persona?
I shall tell you.
Yes, that's right, EGGS!
Harmless enough, you would have thought?
A nice meal or snack; fried, boiled, poached, scrambled raw etc...it's all good.
Not if you are Nanny's chums in the Broadcast Advertising Clearance Centre (BACC). They have decided that eggs are evil, and have banned the advertising of them.
The story begins 50 years ago, when eggs were advertised by Tony Hancock with the slogan:
"Go to work on an egg".
The British Egg Information Service (BEIS) had planned to re-broadcast these adverts to mark the 50th anniversary, and to get us to eat more eggs.
That is until Nanny's knobheads in the BACC, which vets television advertisements before they are screened, stuck their gnarled old noses into to the yolk and said that the campaign breached current Ofcom rules on promoting a varied diet.
Kristoffer Hammer, a BACC spokesman, whined that the issue was not whether a daily egg with your breakfast would be harmful; only that it should be served with fruit juice or toast.
"We are not questioning the effect
it would have on your health.
Our role is to ensure that advertising
that goes on television is in compliance
with the [Communications] act.
It's quite clear from the act that they should
be presented as part of a balanced diet."
What a bunch of knobheads!
As can be clearly seen in the adverts, Tony is eating the eggs with bacon, soldiers and tea. Why do we have to see juice and muesli as well?
Not everyone wants juice and muesli.
Also, do we not have other meals in the day?
The adverts are quite clearly not telling us to eat only eggs throughout the day for fark's sake!
The BEIS thinks this is a load of old bollocks:
"We have been shocked by this ruling,
as eggs are a healthy,
natural food which are recommended by nutritionists.
What's more, there are no restrictions
on the number of eggs people can eat,
which was recently confirmed by the Food Standards Agency,
and between five and seven eggs a week
would be totally acceptable for most people.
In addition, many other advertisers clearly
promote their products to be eaten every day,
such as breakfast cereals, so we are very surprised
that eggs have been singled out in this way."
FACTOID: I can eat 4 eggs in one sitting when having my multi component fry up!
Fay Weldon, who created the slogan, thinks the ban is bollocks as well:
"When you think of what can be run
and what is being run, like low-cost airlines
and cars ... Cars kill,
eggs aren't actually likely to do so."
As said, BACC well deserving the "Knobheads of The Year" award!
Take a trip down memory lane and watch Nanny's banned adverts here, careful that Nanny doesn't arrest you:
Sign the petition, asking for the adverts to be shown, here: Petition
Tell BACC that they are Knobheads here email@example.com