Now that Nanny has achieved something of a "success" with her campaign against fags (England will follow Scotland down the path of banning smoking in public places in July), she is turning her attention to booze.
Despite the fact that this nation was built on booze, the Romans wrote missives home complaining about the tendency of the local Brits to booze and fight every night, Nanny has now decided to try to alter our "mindset" towards drinking.
As we all know, Nanny hates the working classes and has for sometime been going on at them about their smoking, drinking and eating habits. She would do well to remember that it is these same people who have laid down their lives for this country, and kicked the shit out of our enemies.
As Wellington once said, with pride, of his army:
"They are the scum of the earth...
But they are our scum!"
Anyhoo, I digress.
Nanny is now widening her target, she recently told all pregnant women that they must not drink a single drop during their term. This is all well and good except for the following flies in Nanny's oinkment:
1 It is bollocks advice
2 People will ignore it
3 Many women can be pregnant for a wee while before discovering that they are. How are they meant to feel if, during the period of "grace", they downed a few?
4 There is no scientific basis for Nanny's advice
Not content with that, Nanny has now moved up a gear to target "middle class" drinkers...whoever they are?
Seemingly, Nanny is concerned that aside from those of us who down 25 pints in the pub, there are those who drink wine (both in the pub and worse still at home).
Why is Nanny so concerned about this?
Well, she says that it's because they may not know how many units they are drinking.
The real reason is that Nanny can't stand the fact that people are doing things in private, over which she has no control.
In Nanny's world, if she can't see it or control it...then it is wrong.
Therefore she intends to bore the entire country to death with a series of messages "targeted" at those who drink wine etc at home (even Newsnight fell into that trap last night and started to spread Nanny's poison), telling them that they must take care and that the limit (in Nanny's sad little world) for safe consumption is 21 unit for men and 14 for women per week.
I spit upon those units!
The average Brit can down that in one night for fark's sake!
Here is why this advice is bollocks:
1 The target "middle classes" will already be well aware as to the unit content of their booze.
2 We are all adults, so let us determine our own intake.
3 The average "middle class" dinner party these days, if you are to believe the reports, tends to be rather more focused on snorting "a recreational Cameron" rather than drinking yourself under the table.
4 The unit recommendations are aimed at those with the weakest systems, and have no bearing on the average healthy strong individual.
5 The damage that booze does to the system is related to genetics. Hence the fact that the Brits can take the booze, we are bred for it!
6 People will ignore the advice.
Nanny should use her little brain a bit more. She claims that the reason that she hates boozing and smoking so much, is the cost to the NHS of treating the damage that these pleasures take upon us.
The solution to this is simple, raise taxes on these products and stop wasting resources on pointless campaigns and enforcement measures.
1 The taxes will reduce consumption
2 The increase in tax revenue can be used to fund the NHS costs of treating people.
However, Nanny will not do this because she actually likes to interfere in people's lives. Her lectures and enforcement measures keep the population docile and under control, as well as giving her an army of snooping busybodies (eg council smoke spies) who will snoop on us in the guise of "merely doing their job".
By the way, what sort of sad person will volunteer to become a smoke spy?
What kind of individual will enjoy spending their day wandering around pubs and other public places looking for people having a crafty fag, and taking a photo of them doing so?
That's how Nazi Germany started.
Mark my words, Nanny will one day try to ban drinking as well!