Nanny Knows Best
Tuesday, January 06, 2015
Nanny Bans Kids Playing
Thusfar thus good!
Needless to say Nanny is never quite satisfied with losing a battle, as such Nanny will spend £12K of taxpayers' money on erecting (may I say "erecting" before the watershed?) a sound barrier (seemingly ONE person complained again, and the council was "forced" to conduct noise tests). The sound tests showed that the noise level was 10dB higher (to a peak of 59dB) when the kids were playing, as opposed to when the facility was shut.
Is a 10dB increase really that much?
Here is a handy chart, showing how noisy 59dB really is (less than a normal conversation).
Anyhoo, the barrier will measure two metres high and be 13.5 metres long.
Ironically, the recreation area has been there for years and, as far as I am aware, kids have been in existence for hundreds of thousands of years. Therefore quite why this has now become such an urgent problem is beyond my limited intelligence!
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Friday, November 14, 2014
Single Adults Banned From Puxton Park
It is a very sad reflection on the paranoias of a society wherein single adults (ie physically on their own) are banned from public areas, lest they be paedophiles.
Such is the case of Puxton Park bird sanctuary, which has a policy of banning lone adults from admission, as Matthew Richards found to his cost.
Visited the park before with his three grandchildren, and wanted to return on his own to watch the falconry display. To no avail, he was banned on the grounds of "child protection"!
The managers of the park claim, according to the Mirror, that this rule is “in line with other parks”.
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Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Nanny Bans Stakes
My thanks to a loyal reader who pointed me in the direction of some Nanny nonsense going on in Worcester, involving some 8 inch wooden stakes and a health and safety ruling.
Power Park in Worcester is a Civil War themed park, created to commemorate a local battle.
In 2011 8 foot 8 inch thick wooden stakes were erected (there's that word again) on a fence as part of a revamp of the childrens' play area, to commemorate English pikemen.
Now fast forward 2 years and the local council have decreed that the stake erections pose a health and safety threat to children, in the council's view the children might snap the 8 inch stakes in twain.
Really!!??
An 8 inch thick wooden stake can be snapped in twain by a child?
Now whilst the park is run by St Peter’s Parish Council, the £50K funding for the revamp in 2011 came from....any guesses?
Yes, that's right, the council!
The same council that now deems the stakes to be a health and safety hazard.
A Worcester City Council spokesman is quoted by the Mail:
"The concern was that the poles were not wide enough in diameter to withstand children swinging on them.The stakes have been hacked off and are now waist height, doubtless they now pose a trip hazard!
The poles were in danger of snapping when children played on them.
The play area was installed and run by St Peter's Parish Council. The work to cut back the posts was also carried out by them.
Worcester City Council's only involvement was as the landowner, and in that role we advised the parish council that the poles were not wide enough for their purpose and therefore were a potential danger to children playing there."
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Friday, September 14, 2012
Nanny Hates Fags - Blackpool Bans Smoking
As loyal readers know, Nanny really hates smoking.
This is of course rather odd, given that she derives a rather large amount of revenue from the duties imposed on fags and the taxes raised on the profits of the fag companies and the shops and supermarkets that sell them.
Anyhoo, despite the fact that we are in a major recession and (according to the media) the NHS is falling apart, Nanny's NHS in Blackpool has decided to spend some money erecting (there's that pre watershed word again folks!) signs in and around various parks and playing fields in the Blackpool area designating them "smoke free zones".
LOL:)
What a farking waste of money!
According to an article in last month's Blackpool Gazette, signs are already being installed in council-owned playgrounds, and now town hall chiefs are seeking to extend the policy to parks in full.
For why?
Some dodgy "research" has Nanny believing that second hand smoke in a public open space poses a serious health risk to.....yes, you've guessed it.....children!
WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?
How I loath that expression.
Now further bans are planned for Anchorsholme, GeorgeBancroft, Boundary, Claremont, Crossland Road, East Pines, Highfield Road, Kingscote, and Watson Road parks; Central Drive Recreation Ground, Fishers Field, Gynn Square and Whiteholme playing fields.
The park signs will be inscribed with the message:
“To protect children this is a designated smokefree site.”The initiative is part of the “Altogether Now – a Legacy for Blackpool” health promotion campaign, which is a partnership between Blackpool Council, NHS Blackpool and Blackpool Football Club.
Pass the sick bag someone.
Coun Ivan Taylor, chairman of Blackpool’s Health and Wellbeing Board, said:
“The idea is to protect the children who are on the playgrounds.What a load of nauseating crap!
I don’t think it is reasonable for children who are playing to be suffering from inhaling smoke and to being influenced by seeing adults also smoking.
We’ll have to wait and see what the reaction is but I think most people would welcome the reason for it.
Smoking is a killer and we need to do all we can to discourage it.”
How about using the money to improve the quality of the parks by removing the drunks, addicts and other assorted scumbags who pose a far greater danger to the people who use them?
Has this guy never walked down Blackpool's Golden Mile, at around midnight on a Friday, where he can see some real "health issues" that need more urgent attention?
This is money being wasted on a non existent issue!
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Thursday, January 12, 2012
Birmingham Council's Greed
I see that our much "respected" councils are continuing to do their bit to screw us for as much money as possible, in order to maintain themselves in the lifestyle to which they have become accustomed.
Birmingham council are trying to scam people with charges (£25-£50) for taking wedding photographs in Birmingham parks:
“You are welcome to use our parks or green open spaces as backdrops for your wedding photographs and/or film recordings of your Wedding day for personal use only, with prior permission from us.
Use service specific Parks form to make your request providing dates, times and the name of the site where you want to take your photographs.
There is a charge of £50 for commercial photographs and £25 for non-commercial photographs.”
Parks are open spaces owned by (we pay council tax for them) and used by the public, they are not the private fiefdoms of local councils!
Councils are the enemies of the people!
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Tuesday, May 03, 2011
Got To Pick a Pocket or Two...
As austerity continues to bite, Nanny is faced with a shortfall between her tax revenues and her expenditures.
Now in the real world, inhabited by real people such as you and I, when we face a shortfall such as this we attempt to cut back on our expenditure.
Nanny, as we all know, doesn't live in the real world and therefore would not dream of cutting back on expenditure.
Her solution, during times of fiscal tightness, is simple she applies the well worn principle of:
Ker Farking Ching!
It should therefore come as no surprise to learn that local councils, instead of cutting back, are devising new ways to bleed ever more money from their overtaxed residents.
One "wheeze" dreamt up by Hammersmith and Fulham council (Tory run) is to charge people who use parks for their business; eg personal trainers, nannies, dog walkers, teachers leading children through the park etc.
Bills of between £350-£1200 per annum are on the cards for "business use" of the parks.
Funny that, as I assumed that the parks were already paid for via council tax?
On this basis, why not also charge "business" people for walking along the pavement?
Ker Farking Ching!
Councils have become the enemy of the people!
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Thursday, March 03, 2011
Prats of The Week - Lambeth Council
Therefore without blowing further on my trumpet, I will award it this week to Lambeth Council.
For why?
Their attitude to Mulberry trees, instead of wishing to go round the Mulberry bushes the council wishes to obliterate them; as the residents who live near Vauxhall Pleasure Gardens have recently found out.
Two mulberry trees that mark one of the entrances to the park are to be chopped down by the council.
For why?
In order to "improve" the park.
Eh??
Jeff Raggett, the Cultural Arts Development Manager at Lambeth Council, explains all:
"The mulberry trees have red berries that will stain the new granite sets which will therefore require additional cleaning to maintain the newly paved surface."
Meanwhile, thanks to a private donation, plans are afoot to erect a £250K statue of Guru Basavanna in the vicinity, who lived between 1134 and 1196 (not in Lambeth though).
Maybe some of that money could be used to save the trees as well, if Lambeth are so determined to be pig headed about this?
Lambeth Council, well deserving Prats of The Week!
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Friday, July 17, 2009
A Nation of Paedophiles
It is official, Nanny has decreed that all British adults are paedophiles unless they can prove otherwise.
That is the conclusion that we must draw from the absurd rules being imposed by Reigate and Banstead Council, which insists that all football players in the local park (Woodmansterne Recreation Grounds in Banstead) have a criminal records check.
Now why is this such an idiotic rule?
Just ask Darren Chapman, who was trying to play football with his children and their 7 year old friends.
Can you guess what happened children?
Yes, that's right, because Mr Chapman refused to have a CRB check he was arrested when trying to play football with his own family. He spent 5 hours in jail for his "crime" of not obeying the council.
The council demands that all players must undergo a criminal records check, pay for insurance (aha...kerching!!!!) and apply for formal permission for the game.
Mr Chapman, who was eventually released without charge, said:
"All we want to do is have a kickabout with the lads twice a week so they can keep sharp for when their league's training starts again, and we can't."
The troubles began when Mr Chapman began staging regular games for his children and their seven-year-old friends at Woodmansterne Recreation Grounds in Banstead, Surrey.
The local council, Reigate and Banstead Council, told him in February to stop the activity immediately and demanded proof of a Criminal Records Bureau check, insurance and that he make a formal request to use the park area for organised training activities.
Mr Chapman ignored the knobheads in the council, and continued the games regardless. On July 1 Mr Chapman organised a protest picnic, the police arrived at the grounds and arrested him.
Seemingly the police had it in their minds that Mr Chapman was threatening to cause "criminal damage".
A jobsworth from the local council said:
"Unfortunately, although Mr Chapman has been advised on how he can work with the council to obtain the authorised use of the designated areas, to date he has failed to comply with the council's usual procedure."
There you are folks, if you don't obey your local council's rules and regulations you will be arrested!
The enemy of the people is the state and its local lickspittles the councils.
A Surrey Police spokesman gave a meaningless response, saying that their "actions were proportionate throughout the arrest procedure" and subsequent enquiry.
Brain dead bureaucrats who choose not to think about what they are doing always trot out the line that "procedures were followed". They ignore the bleeding obvious point that the procedures may well be bollocks, and that people should use their brains and take the initiative when dealing with the "real world".
Sadly the wrong people are employed by Nanny in the wrong jobs, and the people of Britain are suffering as a result of this.
There will be a reckoning though, as those who live and work in the real world react against the increased taxes and demands being made upon them by Nanny to support her ever burgeoning public sector.
Nanny's child centric policies assume that all adults are paedophiles, unless they pay to prove otherwise. This creates a very nasty and unhealthy divide between children and adults, which is contributing to the feral nature of some of Britain's streets; as adults and children split off into their own little self contained worlds.
Nanny is the child abuser here, not the British public.
BTW, it's a Tory council of course.
Here's David Cameron's email to tell him what you think: camerond@parliament.uk
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Saturday, September 20, 2008
Nanny's Park Rangers III - The Sweet Smell of Bullshit
Dixon of Dock Green posted the following comment yesterday, re Nanny's Park Rangers:
"I got the same reply from DC but received the following reply from Telford Council:
'Thank you for registering your concerns about the Town Park and the recent publicity about our child protection policy.
I would like to reassure you that there is absolutely no suggestion whatsoever that people who visit our park, with or without children, are routinely approached by our staff for no apparent reason.
Unfortunately a letter sent last month to a resident incorrectly stated the situation and has mistakenly led people to conclude that the Council stops adults in Telford Town Park. This is most certainly not the case.
The Town Park is an extremely popular destination for residents and visitors and we attract over 1 million visitors each year. We work hard to create a safe and enjoyable experience and as always everyone is most welcome.
We deeply regret any confusion that may have been caused, in particular to the many people who use and enjoy Telford Town Park.
Ron Odunaiya
Corporate Director
Community Services' "
Hands up all those of you who believe that the letter "incorrectly stated the situation and has mistakenly led people to conclude that the Council stops adults in Telford Town Park".?
How can they have written a letter that contained such misleading information?
The reality is that they have made themselves look such fools over this issue that they have had to backtrack. Instead of being honest, and admitting that they got it wrong, they are pretending it was all just a misunderstanding.
Ah the sweet smell of bullshit!
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Friday, September 19, 2008
Nanny's Park Rangers II
Further to my article about Nanny's Park Rangers who are tasked with questioning unaccompanied adults who walk around Telford Town Park, lest they be child molesters, I dropped an email to David Cameron the very same day.
Here is an extract of the reply that I received yesterday (the speed of response was interesting, as they normally take a week or so to write back. I suspect I hit a nerve!):
"I am writing on behalf of David Cameron to thank you for your recent email.
We are grateful to you for taking the time to get in touch and for bringing your concerns to our attention. Your comments have been noted. As I am sure you can appreciate, even in his position as Leader of the Opposition, David has no influence in local matters taken outside of his constituency and by locally elected councillors. I have however, passed you email on to the Party Chairman, so that she is aware of your views."
All very well, but if Cameron has no influence over "local matters" what is the point of electing a Tory government?
It is at local level that Nanny's malign influence is most keenly felt, because she has empowered (both by statute, and by "blind eye") local councils with powers and responsibilities that they have never had before nor should they have.
Local councils are being used by Nanny to exert control.
The Tory party needs to come up with a coherent plan to curtail the power of both central and local government, otherwise it will be pointless voting for them.
Get that message across to Cameron via this link: Cameron
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Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Nanny's Park Rangers
Nanny's child centric policy has taken another step forward.
She has decreed that all unaccompanied adults walking in Telford Town Park are potential paedophiles. As such, park wardens have been ordered to stop and interrogate anyone who is not accompanied by children.
For fark's sake!
Evidently visitors who are quizzed have to explain their presence and risk being thrown out, or reported to police if their answers are not satisfactory.
"I want to go for a walk"
How the hell can they judge as to whether that answer is "satisfactory" or not???
Nanny's local council (Telford and Wrekin Council) claims that this is a "commonsense approach", aimed at safeguarding children.
It is nothing of the kind, and clearly oversteps the boundaries as to what a council is meant to do.
I guarantee that the local residents have issues wrt refuse collection, and basic amenities being poorly maintained; yet the council meanders off into areas of policy that are outwith its remit.
The local "parkies" have taken to their new Gestapo role with great relish. Evidently two environmental campaigners, dressed as penguins (don't ask!), were thrown out of the park last month when caught handing out leaflets on climate change.
Telford and Wrekin Council said Rachel Whittaker and Neil Donaldson were ejected because they had not undergone Criminal Records Bureau checks or risk assessments before entering the park.
Seemingly this is a requirement under the Child Protection Act.
Errmm...am I drunk?
Have I just read that correctly?
Are they saying that in order to enter a park we now need a risk assessment and criminal records check?
By the way, in case you think that this is another example of Nu labour madness...it is not.
Telford and Wrekin Council is run by the Tories!
David Ottley, recreation manager, said:
"Our town park staff approach adults that are not associated with any children in the park and request the reason for them being there.
In particular, this applies to those areas where children or more vulnerable groups gather."
By this "logic" all adults accompanied by a child are not paedophiles and are perfectly harmless.
Vent your spleen to the council via this link contact@telford.gov.uk
Tell Cameron what you think of the idiots in his local council via this link: Prats!
Don't vote Tory unless they put forward detailed plans for ridding us of the Nanny state.
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