Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Friday, November 26, 2004

Resistance Is Futile

Resistance is FutileNanny is getting a little testy these days, about people constantly criticising her for interfering in their lives.

What a shame!

In fact she has become so annoyed that she has sent her “well respected” apparatchik, Enver Hodge, to tell the British people to “shut up”.

Enver Hodge went on the airwaves today to defend Nanny, and to speak up for the "unsung virtues" of the nanny state.

Dear old Enver has had, you may recall, quite a colourful past life; running a bankrupt and corrupt council.

Enver and friends at Islington council

In the glory days of the 80’s and 90’s Enver was involved with Islington Council, and its childcare policy. In Islington a number of children, in Nanny’s care, were abused by some 32 members of staff; yet Hodge did not act. Indeed when the Evening Standard started to report the issue in 1992, she accused it of “gutter journalism”.

She then managed to further pour salt in the wounds, by writing to the BBC in 2003; claiming that one of the victims, Demetrious Panton, was “extremely disturbed”. Needless to say this dim-witted outburst backfired, and Enver had to apologise and pay £10K to a charity.

In addition to allowing systematic abuse to occur, whilst under her “watch”, Enver managed to bankrupt Islington council. During her period in office she made sure that her own children were kept well out of the clutches of Nanny, by sending them to fee paying schools.

Her nickname, coined by her own staff, during this period was “Enver Hodge”; a reference to the Stalinist dictator of Albania.

With credentials like that, Nanny knew that Enver was the ideal person to lecture parents on how to bring up their children. Indeed Nanny lived in the same street in Islington as Enver Hodge, they were special friends.

Now Enver is back, and has unveiled her “splendid” new plan to tell parents how to bring up their children.

Enver’s department has published a booklet today, which will be given to all new parents, outlining Nanny’s preferred child rearing techniques.

Nanny offers some very worthy advice, such as; how to read a book with a child, and warning parents not to let children watch too much TV.

Enver became rather testy during her media appearance; noting that Nanny is tired of the barrage of attacks over her moves to restrict the right to smack children, smoke in public and eat fatty foods.

Quote:

"I want to celebrate the unsung virtues of state intervention on behalf of families, and I want to expose the contradictions in the position of the Right. There's an element of 'nimbyism' in our attitude to the nanny state. It's all right to put speed bumps outside our front doors to slow down traffic and enhance our property values..

..But we resent the nanny state speed camera catching us as we are late for work and breaking the speed limit..

..The Right, who relish attacks on the nanny state, are very ready to impose their moral values. It is the Right who are constantly telling people how to live their lives
.."

Destruction of the BorgShe finished her tirade by noting that eventually everyone will agree with Nanny; ie Nanny will simply wear us down, until all opposition is extinguished.

Sounds like the refrain of the Borg “resistance is futile”, and we all know what happened to them don’t we children?

Thursday, November 25, 2004

The Politics of Fear

Nanny's Reich Propaganda Minister HainNanny’s special friend and chief propaganda minister, Peter Hain, has rather bizarrely claimed that Britain is safer under the “protection” of Nanny than it would be if there were a Conservative or Liberal government.

Reich Propaganda Minister Hain went on to say that the likelihood of a British September 11 was greatly reduced by the fact that Nanny was keeping a “watchful and protective” eye over us.

I am so relieved that Nanny is here to take care of us!

As if by magic a report appeared, on the very day that the Queen’s speech outlined Nanny’s proposals for increased powers over her “charges”, of a thwarted attempt by terrorists to fly a plane into Canary Wharf.

The one problem with this little scare story is that it is bollocks; the claim, in fact, refers to an alleged attempt over two years ago.

Do you not find it a little odd that Nanny and her Propaganda Minister chose to publish this story now?

The politics of fear is a very nasty and dangerous game; those that seek to rule by fear are morally and intellectually bankrupt.

So be it, since Nanny wishes to play the fear game; let us ask this simple question:

Do you feel safer in Britain now, during Gulf war II, than you did during Gulf War I (when Nanny was not in power)?

Please send your answers to Reich Propaganda Minister Hain at Leader@CommonsLeader.x.gsi.gov.uk

Happy Thanksgiving

ThanksgivingI would like to wish my American visitors a happy, and peaceful, Thanksgiving.

Unfortunately the US Ambassador here in London has, yet again, left me off the invitation list for his Thanksgiving party in Grosvenor Square.

Maybe next year!

I am pleased to say that this site has won plaudits in the USA, in particular "A Nation of Riflemen" has written a very robust article recommending this site to its readers.

My thanks to Kim du Toit, the owner and author of "A Nation of Riflemen", for his article.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Nanny to Reintroduce Food Rationing

Nanny Rations FoodNanny, as we know, hates the way that we live our lives. We are fat, lazy and we eat too much of the wrong food.

Nanny feels that she has done her best to try to persuade us to change our lifestyles, yet we seem to be ignoring her. This inattention to her lectures really annoys her.

Well, Nanny is fed up with being ignored, she does “know best”; and has decided that action will be taken.

One of her special friends, Dr Rachel Davey of Staffordshire University, has been thinking about the problem; and has presented Nanny with a special paper that makes a few radical proposals.

Davey’s paper correctly identifies that the more we eat, and the less that we do, the more weight we will gain.

No problems with her most excellent analysis so far.

Now here is where it becomes a little more worrying; she says that when we are confronted with food we are weak willed, and that we will not voluntarily change our habits.

Oh to have Nanny’s moral backbone!

However, do not despair, this is where Nanny will help us.

Dr Davey, who views our current eating habits as “insidious” and likes to use the word "enforce" (let’s not mince words here doctor), proposes a number of “helpful” measures designed to make us fit Nanny’s ideal:
  • She proposes taxing certain food items, that Nanny dislikes, much like tobacco and drink are taxed


  • She proposes that the advertising of certain food stuff be controlled; in the same way that tobacco and drink advertising is controlled


  • She proposes, and this is the real killer, that certain foodstuffs be rationed; just like they were in the war!
Quote:

“..It is not inconceivable that some form of food rationing and portion size control may be required in future if the dramatic rise in obesity continues. This could be done via supermarkets since most of the food we consume in the home is purchased at a relatively small number of food outlets. Obesity is virtually impossible to treat by conventional methods so efforts need to be directed towards prevention. To change social attitudes and challenge social norms, governments must implement radical policy changes which will enforce an environment in which food production, marketing and consumption are controlled…”

Ration bookDuring the last war, the British government rationed food via a points system. Everyone was allocated 16 points a month, which they could “spend” on food of their choice. Once the points were used up, they could buy no more.

Dr Davey argues that people were fitter and healthier then; therefore it is the right solution for the “obesity” war that Nanny is fighting on our behalf.

Dare I inject a note of reality into Nanny’s view of history here?
  • Rationing was introduced because Britain was at war, people had no choice but to live in this manner; the country was facing starvation, as the U boats cut our supply lines.


  • The war lasted 1939-45, rationing persisted until the 1950’s; by which time people were heartily sick of it. The then labour government had to abolish it, or face a mini “revolution”. Oddly enough people don’t like being restricted in their choices, when there is no war to fight.


  • During rationing there was a thriving “black market”. Nanny’s attempt to introduce rationing will merely produce the same result. An affluent criminal element in society, which will control the supply of burgers and chips.
By the way regarding the current lard shortage, that is threatening to ruin Christmas for many a British household, I have a pack of lard in my fridge; and am open to offers.

Ken's Lard

Please submit your bids to lardbid@kenfrost.com, marking them "I love lard".

As ever, with Nanny’s “solutions” to problems, she has not thought through the consequences of her actions; and blatantly disregards the right of people to choose how they wish to live their lives.

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Weblog Nominations

Nominations for the Best Blog of 2004 are now being taken by www.2004weblogawards.com.

If you like this blog, and think that it deserves an award, then please nominate it via this link Weblog Nomination 2004.

Many thanks.

The Sly Old Fox

Sly Old FoxThose of you reading the British newspapers, and watching the news bulletins, over the last month or so may be forgiven for thinking that Nanny has become obsessed with fox hunting.

She certainly has kicked up quite a fuss over the issue; professing, as she does, to have the best interests of animals at heart.

Oddly enough I see no legislation coming forward to ban shooting or fishing. Doubtless that will come.

In fact Peter Bradley, the parliamentary private secretary to Alun Michael, admitted that Nanny’s friends in Labour don’t “give a stuff” over the fox hunting issue at all:

“We ought at last to own up to it: the struggle over the Bill was not just about animal welfare and personal freedom: it was class war…

This was not about the politics of envy but the polities of power. Ultimately it's about who governs Britain
..”

Nanny meanwhile has stayed above the fray, in fact she has been almost invisible.

Maybe I am tad cynical, “surely not!” I hear you cry, but maybe Nanny has other fish to fry?

Does it not strike you as a little odd that a government so obsessed with media manipulation and spin has allowed, what in theory is a minority sport, to dominate the domestic agenda and media headlines?

The truth is that Nanny does not give a stuff about foxes, one way or the other. However, she has studied their wily ways, and is a sly old fox herself.

You see, ladies and gentlemen, whilst the media, the public and the “opposition” parties’ attentions have been diverted by the hunting issue; Nanny has quietly introduced, and passed, a most dangerous piece of legislation.

The Civil Contingencies Bill became law last Thursday, oddly enough the same day as the fox hunting ban went through with all that fuss.

The Civil Contingencies Bill allows Nanny, at the drop of a hat, to suspend the constitution and impose whatever restrictions on individual liberties and civil rights that she chooses.

Nanny can invoke her right to suspend liberties whenever there is an emergency.

Now, dear reader, what is an emergency?

Simple, anything Nanny says is an emergency is in fact an emergency.

This includes an event or situation, which threatens serious damage to:
  • Human welfare in a place in the United Kingdom


  • The environment of a place in the United Kingdom


  • The security of the United Kingdom or of a place in the United Kingdom
Damage includes:
  • Loss of human life


  • Human illness or injury


  • Homelessness


  • Damage to property


  • Disruption of a supply of money, food, water, energy or fuel


  • Disruption of an electronic or other system of communication


  • Disruption of facilities for transport


  • Disruption of services relating to health
In short, Nanny can now do whatever she likes when she likes.

You should now be afraid, be very afraid!

You may well ask where the media and the “opposition” parties were, when this “rule by dictat” bill was being put through parliament.

Ermm, that’s simple, they were chasing Nanny’s fox.

In truth the media and the "oppositon" parties failed the people of the United Kingdom, I trust that they will hang their heads in shame!

Nanny, I have to hand it to you; you are a sly old fox!