Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Friday, June 10, 2005

Is Your Horse Gay?

Is Your Horse Gay?Common sense has deserted Nanny yet again.

One night in May, Sam Brown a student celebrating the end of his finals at Oxford happened upon a mounted police officer.

For reasons best known to himself, he asked as to whether the horse was gay.

Being a good student, when not receiving a satisfactory answer, he repeated the question a few times.

The police were not amused, and despite trying to apologise Brown found himself "nicked".

It seems that it required 6 officers to take track him down, he boldly tried to make a run for it, and bring him to justice.

A spokesman for Thames Valley Police said that the "homophobic comments" were offensive to the policeman and his horse.

Nicky Ellis, the VP (Welfare and Equal Opportunities) said:

"Obviously it's very hard to judge without having been there, but if the comments were made in a certain way, they may well have come across as homophobic, and if so, it is important that the police take this seriously".

Nanny is concerned that we don't take the issue of animal homophobia seriously enough. As such she is instigating a public awareness campaign, called "Gay Horses".

This is based on the classic TV show from the sixties "White Horses".

Remember that show?

It was made in 1965 as a collaboration between RTS (Radio Television Serbia) of Belgrade and BR-TV of Munich.

It followed the adventures of Julia, a fifteen-year old girl, played by Helga Anders, who leaves Belgrade to spend a holiday with her uncle Dimitri, on his stud farm where, with the help of head groom Hugo, he trains valuable white Lappizaners.

In the opening story, Boris, one of the horses is stolen by gypsies who dye his white coat brown so that no one will recognise him. Julia and Hugo set off to find Boris and upon his recovery an affinity is formed between girl and horse thus setting the scene for the 12 hour-long adventures that followed.

Anyhoo, the show had a fine theme tune called "White Horses".

It went something like this:

"On white horses let me ride away

To my world of dreams so far away

Let me run

To the sun

Nanny will use this tune and song in her campaign, the word white will be substituted by the word gay.

Try it for yourselves, sing along now, it's very catchy.

You can play the music via this link "Gay Horses".

I predict that Nanny will have something of a hit on her hands!


  1. Anonymous11:03 AM

    "one of the horses is stolen by gypsies"

    Nasty bit of racial stereotyping here Ken. Better watch out or you'll be receiving a visit from Thames Valley's finest.

  2. Yes, I'm afraid "stolen by gypsies" is out to be replaced with "Temporarily acquired for other usage by non-gender specific members of the travelling community of Irish/Roma ethnic origin.". As for "White horses"...a whole new minefield :)

  3. Anonymous12:02 PM

    Surely this guy should have opted for a jury trial so he could call the horse as a witness.

    Defence brief: Mr horse, were you offended by the defendant's choice of words?

    Horse: Ney..

    Defence brief: The defence rests, m'lud.....