Hip hip hooray it's new parking rules day today!
Under Nanny's overhaul of parking regulations, a new era of "remote enforcement" is being imposed upon her hapless subjects.
As from today, Nanny's "beloved" and "respected" local councils will be allowed to use CCTV cameras to detect parking offences.
Drivers will not even know that they have been caught until a letter arrives up to 14 days later, by which time they may be unable to gather evidence to defend themselves.
Guilty by default!
How nice that Nanny has been able to overturn centuries of British jurisprudence at the stroke of a pen, without the slightest whimper from anyone.
Have we all gone to sleep?
Cameras can be used only in areas where it is too "difficult or sensitive" for an attendant to operate, ie a fast-flowing road (are there any?) or a busy junction.
Nanny is even renaming the "Parking Attendants".
Can you guess what her new, "non sinister" "non Orwellian" name for them will be?
Civil Enforcement Officers!
I don't like that at all...give a little man a big title (and uniform) and he will act like a right git.
The Civil Enforcement Officers will be given powers to post tickets that they do not have time to finish writing before motorists drive off.
The AA quite rightly has noted that thousands of innocent drivers will receive penalties from attendants seeking an easy way to meet performance targets.
Nanny's councils make over £1BN out of this little scam (a surrogate council tax).
Some councils are planning to require simply that the attendant record the number plate and tax disc number, no evidence whatsoever will be required for a fine to be issued.
Rosie Winterton, the Transport Minister, said:
"Parking enforcement must be fair, clear, consistent and based on robust evidence. We want to increase public confidence in parking. Parking rules exist to help beat congestion and improve road safety.
With more than 30 million vehicles on Britain's roads, just one vehicle parked in the wrong place can cause traffic jams. It can also put other road users in danger."
I agree, unfortunately Nanny's local councils use parking fines to supplement their council tax take. Fines should not be issued by the same organ of the state that then utilises the revenue.
That principle was was worked out, and agreed upon, back in the 17th century; it would appear that Nanny is now seeking to abandon it.
Why not eliminate the need for officers and simply fine us all up front, given that in Nanny's Britain we are guilty until proven innocent?
Happy New Parking Rules Day!