Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

The Dangers of Eggs

The Dangers of EggsThose of you with long memories may well recall that fine old series of adverts (featuring Tony Hancock) "Go to Work on an Egg".

However, times change, and since then Nanny in her many guises (the rot set in with Eggwina Currie) has been lecturing us about the evils of eggs (aside from their "binding qualities", they are harmless).

I don't know why she has got such an antipathy towards them, they are:

1 An excellent source of protein

2 Cheap

3 Versatile

4 Tasty

5 Easy to store and cook

Nanny would have us believe that they are a dangerous source of cholesterol.

This is of course bollocks.

Anyhoo, Nanny has got herself into a right old state over a proposed advert for eggs by Noble Foods that uses children's voices.

The advertisers want to use the children's song, "Chick, chick, chick, chick, chicken, lay a little egg for me".

Nothing wrong with that is there?

WRONG!!!!!

Nanny's trolls in the advertising watchdog Broadcasting Advertising Clearance Centre (a little known body, that is only notable for having banned last year's revival of the Hancock egg adverts...can you see a pattern here folks?) are very upset about the whole thing and have banned it.

Their rationale?

Using children's voices was outside the television standards code, even though no children actually appear in the advert.

What the Fuck!

Kristoffer Hammer, from BACC, said that BACC allowed children under some circumstances to feature in egg adverts, but their voices could not be used to "promote" omega 3 eggs, a concept that most children would not be interested in.

Noble Foods spokesman, Finn Cottle, said:

"We're beginning to suspect that the BACC has a vendetta against eggs."

Indeed she has Mr Cottle!

I can only assume that when she was a child Nanny suffered some form of egg related trauma, which has left her scarred for life. If not, she should have done!

Last year, you will recall, BACC banned the Tony Hancock advert.

Why?

It featured him eating two eggs for breakfast.

BACC said that this promoted an unbalanced diet.

My message to BACC is simple:

FARK OFF!!!

Breeda McBrearty, a nutritionist, quite rightly thinks that BACC is talking out of it own backside. She said that it was "ridiculous" to suggest that children should not enjoy eggs as part of a healthy diet.

Those of you wishing to drop Kristoffer Hammer of BACC a line, with your thoughts on the matter, can email him here kristoffer.hammer@clearcast.co.uk

Take a trip down memory lane and watch BACC's banned Tony Hancock adverts here:

-Housekeeper

-Soul

-Burst Pipe

-Crossword

-Bill

-Englishman

-Star

-Violin

Maybe BACC will try and ban this site too?

11 comments:

  1. "using childrens voices is outside the television standards code"Well there is another currently running on tv,concerning persil washing up liquid? i think,where the little welsh children state that they have a right to a greener environment,is this not also illegal?

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  2. number 610:34 AM

    Ah, I remember the Hancock ads very well. Must have worked as I had two fried eggs this morning and regularly feed my kids with boiled eggs and soldiers.

    Sadly, Mr Hancock became an alcoholic depressive who finally killed himself via an overdose.

    I am sure Nanny will say it was the boiled eggs for breakfast that made him so.

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  3. number 610:42 AM

    Englishman,

    You should know that Nanny approves of all things 'green' regardless of their actual merit to people or the environment.

    Perhaps the egg ads could have run if they were reworded along the lines of "Go to your place of employment(on your bicycle or by highly efficient public transport) on a sustainably produced, eco friendly organic egg, from the lesbian-transgendered single parent farming cooperative."

    Must apply for one of Nanny's non-jobs promoting eco/diversity/tolerance issues someday as I feel I have a talent for it.

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  4. Number 6 said:

    'Perhaps the egg ads could have run if they were reworded along the lines of "Go to your place of employment(on your bicycle or by highly efficient public transport) on a sustainably produced, eco friendly organic egg, from the lesbian-transgendered single parent farming cooperative."'

    There is no way that would be approved...you forgot to add 'ethnic religious minority' in that description.

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  5. So, let me get this straight....It is not right to use children's voices on adverts for eggs....however, it is fine to use kid's voices to emotionally blackmail adults when promoting Nanny's climate change agenda or eco friendly commercial products.

    OK I've got that Nanny.

    Makes you proud to be British doesn't it.

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  6. Grant1:09 PM

    Anonymous number 6 said...

    "Sadly, Mr Hancock became an alcoholic depressive who finally killed himself via an overdose."

    Careful number 6. The phrasing here might be misquoted by others to suggest that Mr. Hancock turned that way BECAUSE he ate 2 eggs for breakfast (in the ads ...)


    However the clear cause of Mr. Hancock's illness was undoubtedly that he lived in East Cheam in the 40's and 50's when rampant pollution from coal fires and uncontrolled chemical use could be linked to both physical and mental health issues. That and living in bed-sits.

    Of course the pressure of public recognition, though desired by all comics, would have led to enormous pressures in the early days of TV availability before the full media management industry become comprehensively developed. Even so there seem to be plenty of similar cases today, though few directly of indirectly linked to eggs.

    Such illnesses are no yolk to the sufferers whose first wish might well be to lose the limelight by withdrawing into their shells.

    Grant

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  7. Jamie5:36 PM

    Oh for fuck sake!!! Listen Nanny, you old bitch. I will decied what I put in MY mouth. Leave us the hell alone.

    What's wrong with the free market? If you want an egg, have one. If you don't want one, don't have one. It really is that simple.

    Just like Ken says egg whites are an excellent sorce of protein and taste nice.

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  8. Oh my goodness. How wrong.

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  9. number 610:36 AM

    The dangers of eggs cannot be understated. Look at what happened to Mr John Lennon, who clearly took a lot of eggs in his youth as he went on to write songs such as "I am the Warlrus" with such damaging lyrics as "I am the warlrus I am the egg man go go go ju bo"

    Clearly eggs unhinged his mind and made him become a mega rich rock star idolised by people all over the world, with houses in NY and England, and gazillons of dollars in the bank before he was murdered by a well know egg abuser Mark Chapman. Yes, Chapman was know to order "eggs over easy" regularly at diners in America, proving that Nanny was right about the very real dangers of egg consumption.

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  10. number 610:45 AM

    Herr Kaptain,

    It would go without saying that no eggs that were not 'halal approved' and ritually boiled facing mecca would be used in any such ad.

    To do otherwise would leave one open to the charge of 'eggislamaphobia' and as such would leave the ad agency and anyone viewing such an ad facing a very lengthy sentence in jail.

    Naturally, stating ones intent to kill, torture, burn alive gays/women/Americans/British/ Europeans'non belivers'and well anyone who does not agree with your medieval theocracy is acceptable to 'inclusive' Nanny.

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  11. BooHoo5:18 PM

    What kind of sick fuck eats chicken menses anyway?

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