The good people of Helston (Cornwall) must consider themselves very fortunate that for over 200 years they have not suffered a serious, clock related disaster.
For you see my loyal readers Nanny has come along just in the nick of time to save these good people from a very nasty occurrence, lest the church clock of St Michael's injures someone.
Since 1793 a volunteer warden has wound the clock up. Nanny very wisely has decreed that this presents a health and safety risk, and as such has banned it.
The church will now have to spend £5,000 to buy a machine to do the job.
The warden, Mr Nott, was given the health and safety advice from the clock's maintenance manager who said that:
"Unfortunately many people who wind clocks up aren't getting any younger and their safety is important."
As ever with Nanny she ignores the reality. Mr Nott's predecessor did the job for 40 years without having an accident, and retired at 80.
Surely there are more important safety issues that Nanny can apply her "brain" to?
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I am certainly not getting any younger - I shall be 82 in a few days time.
ReplyDeleteMust I really spend £5,000 to buy a machine to wind up the 18th century grandfather clock in my hall?
'Elf'n'Safety overkill.....Does anyone see a pattern emerging here?
ReplyDeleteI suspect, as is often the case, there are two factors at play here;
1) The jobsworth is trying to justify his position...These "specialist" departments never say that everything is just fine because, if they did, we would soon realise the department/officer was not needed and could be replaced with commonsense....Now what happened to that?
2) It is the "cover ones arse" card, almost a necessity since everyone in this country has become so compensation focussed aided and abetted by the industry that has grown up in its wake.
What troubles me more is that adult people actually allow this sort of thing to happen without questioning the validity of such diktats....Truly bonkers!!
Isn't Helston where the Furry Dance/Floral Dance takes place? Surely this must be banned for 'elf 'n safety reasons - we can't have the whole population dancing promiscuously hand in hand down the street: what a bad example to set the children!
ReplyDelete"..Furry Dance/Floral Dance"
ReplyDeleteBanned?? Yes! I'm sure Elf'n'Safety would have something to say about the allergy risk!! Won't someone think of the children??
Anticant, you can purchase exemption from the obligation to buy a clock winding machine by paying Nanny the amount she would have received in VAT. You will, of course, have to pay each time she deems the machine to be due for replacement as "avoiding" the tax by winding your own clock is something that cannot be tolerated.
ReplyDeleteIt strikes me as pretty amazing the 'eft'n'safe-T are so absurdly protective - "can't take a chance" being the byword. A completely healthy, beautiful tree in the centre of my village's cemetery was cut down to a hideous centerpiece stump on this principle.
ReplyDeleteYet cars whistle by on the road outside the cemetery, the main route between one small village and the main one. The pavement is maybe 2 foot wide, with a 6 foot stone wall on one side, and traffic hurtling by at up to 60 mph on the other.
One tiny mistake, by traffic in either direction or the pedestrians, and you're toast. How come 'elf'n'safe-T just shrugs at this sort of thing, preferring to concentrate on passenger safety?
How is ok that around 3500 die on the roads each year, and ten times that number crippled, while we treat marginal risks as if they meant certain catastrophe in rarified fields ? Where is any sense of proportion about all this?
Jobs for bureaucrats!
ReplyDeleteFor the psychology behind all this, see Frank Furedi: "The Culture of Fear" and "The Politics of Fear".
anticant said...
ReplyDelete"I am certainly not getting any younger - I shall be 82 in a few days time.
Must I really spend £5,000 to buy a machine to wind up the 18th century grandfather clock in my hall?"
According to the brave new world of the Nanny state, yes you must: pay up, chum, or else!
John B Stryge said...
"Anticant, you can purchase exemption from the obligation to buy a clock winding machine by paying Nanny the amount she would have received in VAT. You will, of course, have to pay each time she deems the machine to be due for replacement as "avoiding" the tax by winding your own clock is something that cannot be tolerated"
That would be about right!
The best thing the good people of Helston could do, would be to take the parasitic jobsworth who came up with this pathetic idea up to the top of the tower, and then push him off. Trouble is, the dustmen would refuse to take away the remains, as they would almost certainly claim they had been put in the 'wrong' bin!