Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Wednesday, June 01, 2011


I am gemused to see that Nanny not only likes telling ordinary citizens how to live their lives, but has also now taken to telling her friends and helpers how to live their lives.

Nanny is now issuing the police with "lifestyle guides", these guides include "helpful" suggestions on bedtime routines and healthy eating options.

Nanny is telling the police to help spouses with the housework, do some gardening and take up dancing lessons.

There is also a helpful section, in some guides, on what filling to put in a police sandwich.

A guide issued to Northamptonshire Police takes top prize for patronising its readers:

"There can be few things more frustrating than just drifting off to sleep then having to get up to visit the toilet.

You should avoid liquid towards the end of a night shift – otherwise your full bladder will respond in the correct fashion

A sad farewell then to the bottle of whisky and pack of fags in the bottom draw.

Jack Regan must be turning in his grave!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

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  1. Lord of Atlantis10:32 AM

    If the police aren't capable of making these kind of commonsense decisions for themselves, without someone holding their hands, I would question their ability to perform the duties of police officers! What a load of tosh! These are all matters they are perfectly capable of attending to correctly, without this bs! What really makes my blood boil about this is that proper police jobs, officers with many years experience, forensic experts and office staff are being compulsorily made redundant, in order to cut costs, yet money is always available for this kind of crap! The criminals must be rejoicing!

  2. My Lord, I completely agree with you.

    Has our once great nation; a nation that led the world in so many fields, really been so dumbed down that we need this kind of guidance?
    Had my employer sent me such a thing, I would have been rather insulted and told them so.

    If only we had a proper education system in this country again!!!

  3. MerkinOnParis6:42 PM


  4. What filling to put in a sandwich???? Six rashers of dead pig and a couple of runny eggs...and if anyone turns up in my office with anything else I'll staple their knackers to the desk!

  5. Mjolinir4:06 AM

    The one I really liked had a link to an official NHS leaflet on - how to sit on the toilet!

  6. Anonymous9:14 PM

    Actually chaps, this guidance may not be out of place.

    Have you had anything to do with our brilliant boys in blue lately?

    Top of the Form they ain't.