Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Plodding Along

Plodding AlongIn case you are wondering why you never see a policeman when you need one, it's because the poor chap/chapess is processing Nanny's paperwork.

The average time taken by police to process a single arrest is now a stonking 10 hours and six minutes.

It seems that officers are now spending more than their standard eight hour shift filling out forms and waiting for lawyers to arrive.

These figures were released mid November, in a written answer to a question to the Metropolitan Police Service by Labour London Assembly member Joanne McCartney, and are based on a survey taken by Scotland Yard in January 2006.

Other studies indicate that up to 33 forms need to be completed to process a single mugging suspect.

Nobody knows the true number of forms in circulation, as each force produces its own paperwork.

That's clever eh?

Nanny's Home Office claims it has made 7,700 forms across the 43 police forces obsolete over the past two years.

This begs the question, as to how many other forms there are still out there?

In the good old days a suspect would simply trip up on the police station steps, and sustain a mild concussion and a broken nose.

No need for paperwork then.

Ah, the good old days!:)


  1. "We knew how to be nice to the nice people, and nasty to the nasty people."

    -A remembered quotation from a retired police officer explaining how and why British policing was once so much more efficient.

  2. Anonymous10:59 AM

    Ken observed;

    "Nanny's Home Office claims it has made 7,700 forms across the 43 police forces obsolete over the past two years."

    Ah! yes, but an obsolete form is not the same as a reduced form burden. This would be especially so when the 43 forces create their own forms, presumably in response to someone's need to record and count things.

    And of course 7700 forms sounds impressive, but divide that by 43, since forces will have their own versions of the same 'form' (The concept of suggesting a police force has form is mildly amusing) and you get 180 or thereabouts.

    Not so impressive.

    No doubt there will be an army of clerical workers somewhere doing something in triplicate with all these forms. If Nanny is 'smart' they will be people who may vote for her for providing jobs.

    If she is not they will probably be outsource workers in India or China with no votes.

    The great thing about forms is that they provide a means of measurement for things that might otherwise be unmeasurable, even if that measurement only provides information about the number of forms filled in.

    Nanny knows that once you have numbers they suddenly become incontrovertible truth. Nanny has been told this by her chum Gordon who knows just how to make the most of numbers - especially repetitive numbers that might, for example, be the same number popping up in several different forms.

  3. Some of these forms will probably be needed but I don't see why they can't just hire administrators to do most of it. It will probably cost a lot of money but it will get the police back on the streets and not stuck filling in forms.

  4. Anonymous3:02 AM

    Youdon'tknowme said:

    .."It will probably cost a lot of money but it will get the police back on the streets and not stuck filling in forms..."

    You have missed the point of nanny's police these days.

    The Police are basically Tax Collectors, not crime fighters.

    No Bobby in his or her right mind would take on a criminal.

    It's much safer to harras mini-van Mommies for not wearing a seatbelt correctly, or to pull over a suspected "Drunk Driver" than to take on a possibly armed gangster.

    The British police are the most useless form of life on the planet.

    The Bobbies are safe in the station filling out forms.

    The rest of the once Great Brits have to deal with the gangsters and criminals.

  5. Well what we need is a government that will get back to policing properly. if the police won't do it sack the lot of them and use the army. bad idea but it will tell the police that they are expendable and may get them to do their job.

    The police should be allowed guns to. If you are told to stop by the police and you keep running it should be legal for them to shoot you unless you actually stop and then make the criminal pay for the hospital bill.