Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Thursday, December 31, 2015

Happy New Year!


Have it large tonight everyone!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Nanny Knows What You Are Up To


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Merry Christmas


Merry Christmas everyone, and a Peaceful and Happy New Year!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Nanny Bans Man Flu - It's Sexist!


As per the Telegraph:
"Jeremy Vine, the BBC radio presenter, has been reported under the broadcaster's "equality and diversity code" for saying he had man flu. 
The 50-year-old broadcaster revealed he was suffering from a persistent cough at night after falling ill a few days ago during a feature about Victorian ailments on his Radio 2 lunchtime show."
Are people farking stupid?

Do they have so much time on their hands, that they deliberately look for things to be offended about?
 
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Student Hypocrisy


How wonderful it is to be a student, and to be so morally sure of your views about the world and how it should be run.

Kudos to Ntokozo Qwabe, an Oxford student, who is leading a campaign to remove a statue of Cecil Rhodes from Oriel College because Rhodes is no longer regarded in quite the same light as he was back in Victorian times.

A truly moral outlook!

Whilst there can be a theoretical rationale for revisionism (eg were the college to have had a statue of Hitler or Jimmy Savile, it would be expected that these statues should be removed), sometimes revisionism doesn't quite stack up especially when the revisionist has a few issues himself.

You see dear reader, Mr Qwabe is a Rhodes' scholar (ie his education is being funded in part by money derived from a fund set up by Cecil Rhodes). In 2014 the fund spent £8M on 89 scholars.

There's irony for you!

Unperturbed by this apparent "irony" Mr Qwabe, and members of the Rhodes Must Fall movement, have said that paying homage to the British imperialist is at odds with the university’s “inclusive culture”.

Mr Qwabe is in fact adamant that the money wasn't Rhodes' in the first place. As per the Telegraph:
Rhodes did not have a scholarship. It was never his money. All that he looted must absolutely be returned immediately."
Mr Qwabegoes goes on to argue that he is simply taking back “tiny fractions” of what Rhodes looted during his time in Africa.
I’m no beneficiary of Rhodes. I’m a beneficiary of the resources and labour of my people which Rhodes pillaged and slaved.
Ah the certainty and moral high ground of youth!

Fortunately Mr Qwabe is still young enough not to be tainted by the "older person's" disease of hypocrisy.


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Monday, December 21, 2015

#economia50


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Thursday, December 17, 2015

#QualityStreetGate - Rationing


Following reports of the downsizing of Quality Street tins over the years, Nestle have responded saying it's not true.

As per the Telegraph a Nestlé spokesman said:
"This image does not compare like for like. 

As well as the 780g tub pictured, we also have a 1.3kg tin available which lovers of Quality Street might like to try this Christmas. 

We want to give the best possible value for money and we believe that this product is still extremely competitive." 
Comments?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Rationing In The Nanny State


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

Healthy Eating Is Mental Disorder


Ha Ha!

Now I have heard everything!

Having bombarded us with propaganda urging us to eat healthy food, and eschew processed shite, Nanny has now decreed that healthy eating (or rather the desire to eat healthy food) is in fact a mental disorder.

As per Living Traditionally:
"In an attempt to curb the mass rush for food change and reform, psychiatry has green lighted a public relations push to spread awareness about their new buzzword “orthorexia nervosa,” defined as “a pathological obsession for biologically pure and healthy nutrition.” In other words, experts are saying that our demand for nutrient-dense, healthful food is a mental disorder that must be treated."
Fear not, should you be diagnosed with this mental illness, the pharmaceutical companies and the psychiatrists (paid for by those very same companies) will sell you some tablets to "cure" you.

Now where did I put that couscous?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Monday, December 14, 2015

Global Warming Solved!


Those who believe in global warming must be really delighted that world leaders have manged to save the planet, in the climate change deal reached this weekend in Paris.

ROFLMAO!

In the unlikely event that mankind (as opposed to nature/solar activity etc) has a major hand in climatic changes (eg warming or freezing) do people really think that countries such as China, India, USA etc are going to cut back on their emissions and stick to the agreement?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, December 11, 2015

Goodbye Sovereignty - All Hail The EU's New Border Force!

 
The FT reports that the European Commission will unveil plans next week to replace the Frontex border agency with a permanent border force and coastguard, this force will be deployed with the final say of the commission.
 
The commission will be handed the power to authorise a deployment to a frontier, on the recommendation of the management board of the newly formed European Border and Coast Guard. This would also apply to non-EU members of Schengen, such as Norway. Although member states would be consulted, they would not have the power to veto a deployment unilaterally.

If the plan is approved by EU states, Frontex’s replacement will have a slew of new powers, including the ability to hire and control its own border guards and buy its own equipment. It will also be allowed to operate in non-EU countries (such as Serbia and Macedonia, which have become transit countries for people trying to reach northern Europe) if requested.

We will all become vassal states of the commission!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, December 09, 2015

Nanny Trump To Close The Internet


Presidential hopeful Nanny Trump appears to be having some form of mental breakdown.

As per The Independent:
"Children in America are “watching the internet and they want to be masterminds”, Trump said in a speech.

"We're losing a lot of people because of the internet," Trump said. "We have to see Bill Gates and a lot of different people that really understand what's happening.

“We have to talk to them about, maybe in certain areas, closing that internet up in some ways. Somebody will say, 'Oh freedom of speech, freedom of speech.' These are foolish people."
Good luck to the good people of America if Trump ever becomes President!

Those whom the gods wish to destroy, they first make mad.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, December 08, 2015

Brighton Council's Plans To Ban Beach Smoking Thwarted


Loyal readers may recall that back in October I wrote about Brighton and Hove council's smoking survey, which tried to persuade everyone to ask for smoking to be banned on Brighton beach etc.

At the time, because of so many responses, the council said it would put back the discussion until 2016.

Well it appears they have decided not to keep it under wraps anymore, and will discuss it next week.

The result?

As per Pages 105-124:
"There is no majority support from smokers and non-smokers, residents or visitors, for smoke free beaches or parks."
It seems that:
"Opposition to extending smoke free outdoor spaces falls mainly in to three camps, the perception that, there is no evidence that second hand smoke is harmful, the perception, of negative effects on the local economy and human rights/big brother/Nanny State."
Suffice to say, Nanny hates it when she is overruled. Whilst she will probably drop her plans to ban beach smoking, she still wants to have other areas ban it.

As per Brighton and Hove News:
"The council encourages primary schools to implement a voluntary ban at their entrances, and continue its voluntary ban on smoking in playgrounds and at the entrances to children’s centres.

It also recommends the council work with restaurants and pubs to encourage smoke-free outdoor areas on a voluntary basis."
We must be forever vigilant in the ongoing war against the Nanny state!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, December 04, 2015

Kids Company Fallout - Another Clown Quits


Alan Yentob has weaseled out of censure over allegations that he interfered with the BBC's coverage of the collapse of Kids Company, after quitting his executive role before Auntie's governing body could launch an independent investigation into the claims.

Yentob, who chaired the failed charity, said that he had decided to step down from his £183,000 creative director post at the end of this year, because of the “serious distraction” caused by claims that he had tried to influence the output of the BBC’s news programmes. He will retain his position as host of Imagine, the arts strand, for which he thought to be paid around £150,000 a year.

The Telegraph understands that Yentob had been warned that the BBC Trust was on the brink of announcing an inquiry into his behaviour. 

This is not over yet, by any means!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Thursday, December 03, 2015

Newsnight Censors Hilary Benn


It was fascinating to see that last night's Newsnight completely failed to show or even mention one of the greatest parliamentary speeches made in recent times.

Namely the speech made by Hilary Benn urging that we "confront this evil".

Were the editors of Newsnight asleep during this speech, or did it not suit their political narrative?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, December 02, 2015

Nanny Starves The Elderly


It seems that once you have outlived your useful life in the UK, Nanny's soltuon is to starve you in the hope you just die.

As per STV's report about Langlands Unit at the Queen Elizabeth University Hospital (QEU) in Glasgow (a new hospital!):
"Another patient was not fed for an entire eight-day period while at the hospital. They were not to be fed by mouth and instead through tubes but staff failed to provide any nutrition to them at all."
"God" forbid I ever become old in the UK, it seems that it is hell on earth to be placed in the clutches of Nanny.

Please "God" that I die before I become too old!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, December 01, 2015

Overweight Haters


As loyal readers know, Nanny has been bombarding us with anti obesity propaganda (via the media and NHS) for yonks.

As such it should come as no surprise to learn that Nanny's actions has spawned a group of people (self styled "Overweight Haters Ltd") who use their energies to vilify those who are not in their view the "correct" shape.

The BBC reports that commuters on the London Underground are being handed cards telling them they are a "fat, ugly human" by a group that claims to "hate and resent fat people".

NHS worker Kara Florish posted a message on social media after being handed a card while travelling on the Tube on Saturday.

British Transport Police said they had been made aware of the campaign.

The force has also had an incident reported in which a person was given a card.

This is the consequence of Nanny bombarding us with daily propaganda, singling out people who don't fit in with Nanny's idealised physical form.

You should not single people out because they are different to you. We all have "back stories" and "issues", bullying one group of people to make us feel better about our own failings is wrong.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Monday, November 30, 2015

Nanny's Sugar Tax High


The Commons' Health Committee (consisting of 11 MPs) claims that a tax on sugary drinks should be introduced as part of a "bold and urgent" set of measures to tackle child obesity.

The Committee claims that there was now "compelling evidence" a tax would reduce consumption.Its report also proposes a crackdown on marketing and advertising.

The committee's report said calls for a tax could "no longer be ignored".

Nanny is so desperately short of cash that she will tax anything that moves. In the event she taxes sugary drinks, she will also tax all other foods containing sugar and then move on to other "evil" foods (eg ones that contain fat, starch, cholesterol etc) ie all foods!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, November 27, 2015

Taking The Piss


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

The Past Is Offensive and Should Be Banned


In a remarkable fuss over nothing that can only occur in a university, where seemingly students have too much time on their hands, colleges at the University of Oxford have been drawn into a 'race row' after advertising New Orleans and 1920s-themed balls, to be held in May 2016.

The problem?

According to some students the balls may cause offence to female and ethnic minority students.

For why?

Well, according to the complainers, the 1920's were a time when people of different ethnic origins and women were not largely present in colleges.
 
Magdalen College’s ball, inspired by "The Great Gatsby", promises to take students "back to 1926". It has been marketed using the quote:
"Can’t repeat the past? Why of course you can!"
Arushi Garg, a law student at the college, is quoted by the Telegraph:

"Obviously my demographic (woman of colour from a former colony that remains a developing country) makes me less likely than others to uncritically long for a past that privileged some more than others. 

But it would be nice if they cut down on the nostalgia a bit, because if we were re-living the past, the corridors of institutional spaces like Magdalen/Oxford is definitely not where you would find people of my gender, race and nationality. 

I wrote to the Magdalen organisers and they engaged quite respectfully with me, and are communicating with me to understand why I think this is problematic."
Lincoln college has faced criticism for "cultural appropriation" (what does that mean in English?) due to the marketing around its New Orleans-themed ball.

The co-chairmen of the student union’s Campaign for Racial Awareness and Equality and others have said that it promotes "nostalgia for an era steeped in racism."

As noted, only in a university would you find allegedly intelligent people getting hot under the collar over a fancy dress dance. Whatever era you look at, it would offend someone from somewhere. The present day isn't exactly heaven on earth either!

I am surprised they haven't complained about the word "balls" to describe the dances, given that it clearly has sexist connotations!


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Nanny Argues With Herself Over Health and Safety


The final Lido Nights Christmas charity show, scheduled to be performed in the Saltdean Lido, billed as the “last ever” has been cancelled.


Why?

Health and Safety!

Except that the show had been organised since June, and the outgoing trustees of the Lido claim that all licences, insurances and safety certificates are in place.

Former trustee Ethel Trigg is quoted by Brighton and Hove News:
Before we handed over the building to the new trustees we had our own Risk Assessment carried out in the presence of Brighton and Hove City Council, and everything was up to standard. The new trustees individual Risk Assessment must obviously be contradictory to ours.

Organiser Chris Mr Nieto says he offered to pay for any extra insurance, and believes that any health and safety issues raised by the new trustees, such as contractors’ equipment left by fire exits, can easily be overcome.

However,  new chair Cathy Gallagher said:
We have also been reviewing health and safety matters and carrying out a risk assessment.

There has been an urgency about this as we were being asked to confirm that  the a Lido Night event scheduled for 28 November 2015 would be supported by the trustees.

Unfortunately in the short time available to us we were not able to recommend the event proceed based on the information available to us.

We realise that there will be a disappointment for all of those who were looking forward to the event and we are really sorry about that, but we hope you will understand that health and safety has to be our main priority at any event, no matter what the cause or beneficiary.

As trustees it is fair to say we are risk averse as we consider we have a duty of care to all visitors to the community centre.”
It sounds to me as though the new trustees don't trust the old trustees, wrt their health and safety review, and are using "lack of time" as an excuse to avoid making any effort to go ahead.

Is it any wonder that those of us who live and function in the real world don't respect health and safety "experts"?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Monday, November 23, 2015

Climate Change Spawned ISIS


Oh dear, whoever is advising HRH Price Charles on what he should/shouldn't say to reporters has clearly fallen asleep at the wheel.

Climate change, whatever royal Nanny says, has not spawned terrorists such as ISIS!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, November 20, 2015

Farts Cure Cancer


According to research there is now finally one thing that doesn't cause cancer.

Hoozah!

In fact it cures it.

Can you guess what it is children?

Yes, that's right:

Farts!

According to researchers at Exeter University, the smell of flatulence has secret health benefits that could help stave off cancer, strokes, heart attacks and dementia.


Hydrogen sulfide helps protect cells and fight illness.

You now know what to do people!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Thursday, November 19, 2015

Send In The Clowns!



This is what happens when people and Prime Ministers are distracted and bedazzled by clowns!

Are we sure that fraud hasn't been committed in the Kids Company?

Where did the money go????


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Nanny Bans White Cane for Health and Safety Reasons


Nanny has plumbed new depths of stupidity by temporarily banning a seven year old blind schoolgirl from using her white cane in school due to health and safety concerns.

Lily-Grace Hooper was told she could not use her cane at Hambrook Primary School in Winterbourne Down near Bristol.

Lily-Grace has been using the lightweight cane in school since April without issue. However, thanks to a risk assessment (pass the sick bag someone) carried out by the school the cane is now regarded as a risk to others, lest they trip up over it.

The school's "solution" is for Lily-Grace to be guided everywhere she walks by adults, and for her to walk "carefully over all surfaces".

How the fuck does that help her learn to be independent?

The school insist that the measure is temporary.

Head teacher Jo Dent is quoted by the BBC:
"The pupil has not been banned from bringing in their cane, we have simply asked them to not use it around school as a temporary measure until we have the chance to meet with the parent and discuss the situation. 

It was initially hoped we would have this resolved within a day or two.

The school's mobility officer raised health and safety issues around the new cane following a recent risk assessment. 

We have to consider all of our pupils, so it is important that we have an opportunity to discuss the situation before we make any decisions. 

We are very keen to resolve this issue as soon as possible and have been actively seeking to engage with the parent to bring this to an agreeable conclusion."
Okay two things here:

1 What the fuck is a "mobility officer", and why does a school need one?

2 How does meeting with the parents change the situation wrt Lily-Grace being allowed to use the cane? Either the risk assessment is bollocks or it isn't, a discussion cannot change the validity or otherwise of a risk assessment.....or can it? In other words, the school regards the risk assessment as bollocks and needs a means to bin it.
 
Nanny and her risk assessments need to be binned!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Barney Selfie Alert



Proof that Nanny really does think that we are all slack jaw, dribbling imbeciles!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Monday, November 16, 2015

Everything Gives You Cancer - Food Nazis Ban Toast and Roast Spuds


The food Nazis are currently having a field day identifying what foods they believe cause cancer. Added to the list of everything that kills us, are crisp roast potatoes and crunchy toast.

A study by the Food Standards Agency (FSA) measured the amount of acrylamide (an alleged cancer-causing toxin) in roast potatoes, chips and toast.

Guess what?

You are all going to die of cancer if you eat any of these foods!

The FSA’s chief scientific adviser said the new research showed the need for roast potatoes and chips to be cooked to only “a light golden colour”, and that bread should be toasted to “the lightest colour acceptable”.

Professor Guy Poppy, the FSA’s Chief Scientific Adviser, is quoted by the Telegraph:
"The risk assessment indicates that at the levels we are exposed to from food, acrylamide could be increasing the risk of cancer.
Whenever I see the phrase "risk assessment" I instinctively reach for my sickbag.
 
The food Nazis decree the following:
  1. Parboil potatoes first before roasting them - considered the best method for producing crispy ‘roasties’ anyway - because the process reduces the free sugars that generate acrylamides
  2. Storing potatoes in a cupboard rather than fridge. Low temperatures can increase the amount of sugar and sweetness in the potato , leading to more acrylamide when cooked
  3. Cooks should not ‘fluff up’ parboiled potatoes before roasting them because in doing so it increases the surface area which in turn increases levels of acrylamide
As I have noted before, we are all going to die at some point. 
 
The fact that we are living longer than our bodies/brains were designed for, increases the chances that we will develop some form of cancer (which is now used as the "tick box" excuse on the death certificate for a death, in place of the traditional "old age")

Please can these food Nazis just fuck off!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, November 13, 2015

Dog Shit Night Vision Goggles


Nanny's chums in Stafford Borough Council are so vexed at the amount of dog shit on the streets of Stafford, that they have given staff night vision goggles as a way to stop the ongoing battle against dog fouling.

I kid you not!

Undercover wardens will be equipped with the high-tech £200 devices, in a bid to catch out dog owners who fail to clean up after their pets during the winter months.

The equipment comes with a built in laser illuminator to improve viewing in the dark, and council staff will patrol dog fouling "hot-spots" across the town.

Wardens will be able to spy on residents using covert tactics and issue them with £75 on-the-spot fines if they are caught in the act.

Whilst dog shit is indeed a scourge, I am a tad wary of giving "enforcers" night vision goggles to spy on all and sundry. Aside from being overkill, does it not give rise to privacy concerns amongst the good people of Stafford?


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Hampshire County Council Refuses To Fess Up To High Earners



Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Ker Farking Ching - The Great Speed Course Con


Last Friday I wrote that police have more than doubled the amount they collect from running speed awareness courses since 2010.

It also appears that police are so keen to sell these courses, that they are conning motorists by failing to make clear how drivers could inadvertently leave themselves uninsured by taking part in them.

The Telegraph reports that insurers have admitted they treat speed awareness courses the same as penalty points, and it is now feared that failing to declare taking part in course could invalidate drivers' policies.
The courses, which cost between £80 and £150, allow drivers to avoid penalty points on their licences. However, campaigners claim that this lulls many motorists into a false sense of security that they do not have to declare the course to insurers, in the hope their premiums will not rocket for a speeding-related offence.

However, insurers usually operate a “catch all” clause in their policies about keeping them informed about factors which may affect your driving, and failing to declare a course could lead them to cancel cover in the event of an accident, experts said.

Ian Belchamber, a campaigner who runs an anti-speed camera campaign in Dorset, said:
The police’s actions are potentially resulting in people driving uninsured because they haven’t told motorists to tell their insurers about the speed awareness course. 

I would make sure your insurer knows you’ve been on a course regardless of whether they specifically ask for that information. 

If you are involved in an accident and the insurer looks into your history and sees you’ve been on a speeding course they could say ‘You didn’t tell us about this, you’re not covered’.

The police don’t want people to know this because they make a lot of money out of the courses.
The Telegraph can confirm that two companies set up with close links to the now-defunct Association of Chief Police Officers are now entwined with the organisation’s successor, the National Police Chiefs Council (NPCC).

An NPCC spokesman said Suzette Davenport, the chief constable of Gloucestershire Police, sits on the board of the National Driver Offender Retraining Scheme (NDORS), which registered a £44 million turnover last year for providing safety awareness courses.

A director of NDORS is Meredydd Hughes, the former chief constable of South Yorkshire, who was responsible for road policing at Acpo until he was caught speeding at 90mph in a 60mph zone in 2007, and stepped down from the role.

He is also a director of another company in the sector, Road Safety Support.

Ker Farking Ching!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Everything Causes Cancer - Frying and BBQ


Adding to the list of things that might kill you, researchers from the University of Texas say that certain cooking techniques, such as frying and barbecuing, may increase the risk of cancer further.

The study, published this week in the journal Cancer, also claims that individuals with specific genetic mutations are more susceptible to the harmful compounds created when cooking at high temperatures.

However, the researchers say they cannot make specific recommendations regarding acceptable amounts of meat intake based on the current study.

The solution?

Either ignore Nanny's hysteria and eat/drink a balanced diet and enjoy your life, or eat dust and be miserable.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Monday, November 09, 2015

Lard Is Good For You


I was hugely gemused to read that some "experts" have now decided that vegetable oils are dangerous for you (yet another cancer causing product), and that they recommend that we should be using olive oil, butter and lard to cook with as they are healthier.

This is what I have been saying all along!

Martin Grootveld, a professor of bioanalytical chemistry and chemical pathology, said that his research showed “a typical meal of fish and chips”, fried in vegetable oil, contained as much as 100 to 200 times more toxic aldehydes than the safe daily limit set by the World Health Organisation.

In contrast, heating up butter, olive oil and lard in tests produced much lower levels of aldehydes.

How interesting that Nanny's NHS advice is to replace “foods high in saturated fat with lower-fat versions” and warns against frying food in butter or lard, recommending instead corn oil, sunflower oil and rapeseed oil. Saturated fats raise cholesterol levels, increasing the risk of heart disease.

Prof Grootveld, of De Montfort University in Leicester, who carried out a series of experiments, is quoted by the Telegraph:
For decades, the authorities have been warning us how bad butter and lard was. But we have found butter is very, very good for frying purposes and so is lard.

People have been telling us how healthy polyunsaturates are in corn oil and sunflower oil. But when you start messing around with them, subjecting them to high amounts of energy in the frying pan or the oven, they undergo a complex series of chemical reactions which results in the accumulation of large amounts of toxic compounds.
What should we conclude form this volte farce in what we should/should not eat?

Simple, Nanny's advice should always be ignored as it is bollocks!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, November 06, 2015

Ker Farking Ching - Speed Awareness Courses Fund The Police



Following on from yesterday's article about Bedfordshire's Police and Crime Commissioner (Olly Martins) wanting all drivers who travel at more than 70 miles per hour to be fined in order to raise money for the police, the Telegraph reports that police have more than doubled the amount they collect from running speed awareness courses since 2010, despite a warning from ministers to stop raising revenue from speeding offences.

While the money collected from speeding fines goes to the Treasury, police forces are able to keep what they charge for running speed awareness courses, around £100 a time.

The vast majority of motorists prefer this option over a fine, because they avoid having points added to their licence and thereby keep their insurance premiums down.
In recent years, there has been a huge increase in the number of people attending such courses, as forces across the country recognise the financial benefits. In 2010 the number of people attending National Speed Awareness courses was 447,724, but by last year that figure had more than doubled to 1.19 million.

Ker Farking Ching!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries