Guy Fawkes night has just been and gone for another year; most of us managed to survive it unscathed, despite Nanny's warnings of doom and disaster.Nonetheless, Nanny's chums in Test Valley Council Hampshire tried their very best to dampen the local residents' attempts to enjoy themselves on the 5th.
The residents were told by Nanny to spend their evening more constructively, composting their garden waste!
In a leaflet, the Test Valley Council, claimed that smoke from bonfires annoyed neighbours, made people ill and drifted over roads.
The council went on to warn that smoke, ash and smell polluted the environment and damaged people's health, especially those suffering from asthma, bronchitis or heart conditions.
It also warned of the dangers posed by bonfires spreading to surrounding fences and shrubs, as well as smoke causing traffic hazards.
The British people have been organising bonfires for the last 400 years, since the Gunpowder Plot was uncovered; we have managed to survive, and the country has yet to be engulfed in flames.
Nanny should really find something better to do with her time.
"The council went on to warn that smoke, ash and smell polluted the environment and damaged people's health, especially those suffering from asthma, bronchitis or heart conditions."
ReplyDeleteBut the same pouring from car exhaust pipes dosen't?
Pete
I have to say, that I agree with your line of thinking Pete.
ReplyDeleteWe are for ever warned about the dangers of smoking etc; yet how much damage is being done to us by the car?
But smoking and bonfires are easy targets.
Ken
Not much damage done by car exhausts these days with the removal of lead and the addition of catalytic converters. The most damaging pollutants that still come from internal combustion are particulates - and those are mainly generated by large diesel engines. Such as those in buses and trains. So what are the chances of nanny decreeeing that public transport is bad for you?
ReplyDelete"The British people have been organising bonfires for the last 400 years, since the Gunpowder Plot was uncovered"
ReplyDeleteI'm no historian, but I venture to suggest that the British people have been organising bonfires for quite probably a significant time before.
You might have a point there:)
ReplyDeleteI think the case is clear that cars do offer a practical benefit in terms of ability to travel, social, domestic and pleasure, wherease bonfire's don't have any particuarly useful purpose other than burning some garden waste and old furniture which would probably be better composted or sold at auction to people who collect stuff. Lack of effective purpose ight also be a criticism levelled at highly polluting buses and trains.
ReplyDeleteAnd of course bonfires, fires in general, produce lots of nasty dioxins which were the things that must have been killing our ancestors for thousands of years ever since some idiot discovered fire. But for that the population of the world would now be about 50 trillion and you would need to be about 3000 years old to get into the Guiness book of records as an oldest person.
But I digress.
Bonfire night is indeed long in the tooth and should be replaced by a more up to date and high tech celebration in keeping with modern trends.
Fire is very passe the days so how about blowing up a hotel or two to commemorate the date of the Brighton Bombing - similar sort of concept to the one that Guido supported so it would seem to be a reasonably logical updating of the theme.
The additional benefits would accrue from the CO2 output from cement used in the reconstruction work which would provide fertilisation for plants to help them to continue their recovery from the last ice age. And for those who see CO2 as an important greenhouse gas there is at least the hope that it would add a few millionths of a degree to winter temperatures in order to reduce the death rate at that time of year.
Leading on from that we coould perhaps provide those in need with the materials that would have been combusted in the pointless bonfire and a stove in which to burn them thus keeping the memory of the plot alive whilst performing a practical social service covering a period of more than one night.
I guess they heard about Bloggerheads burning Tony Blair
ReplyDeletehttp://www.bloggerheads.com/archives/2005/11/and_at_710pm_th.asp