The penis...Oops sorry...spelling mistake!
Start again Ken.
The pen is mightier than the sword, or so the old saying goes.
Evidently Nanny believes in these old sayings, as her chums in the British Standards Institution (BSI) have decreed that fountain pens are too dangerous for children under the age of 14.
Rather frightening to know that for decades children have been using these dangerous instruments, now to be told by Nanny that they can't. I myself had one at the tender age of 10, and ink blotted and smudged exercise books galore with it.
It seems that the BSI are worried that children, who apparently these days are congenital morons (if Nanny were to be believed), will swallow the cap.
Nanny has got so excised by this latest threat to civilisation that she has persuaded Waterman, the well known pen manufacturer, to insert a small slip with its pens which reads:
"This product is not intended for use by anyone under the age of 14 years."
Regrettably, owing to the failure of Nanny's education system, many children are in fact unable to read/understand this warning.
British Standard 7272, drafted in 1990 and updated several times, sets out strict guidelines on how pens should be made.
It says a pen cap should have a small hole to allow a child to breathe if he or she swallows it. Pens with no hole are seen as unsuitable for under-14s.
Needless to say nothing is ever simple in Nanny's Lah Lah Land, some adult pens are now defined as jewellery and therefore fall outside of BS 7272.
Kevin Jones, the headmaster of St John's College School, Cambridge, with 460 pupils aged four to 13, said:
"Perhaps I will have to employ pen police."
Don't joke, I am sure that there will be a some form of Nanny Citizens' Militia formed to deal with this threat.