Fried Vegetables Are Good For You

I am gemused to read that, contrary to all previous advice from Nanny, the healthiest way to cook vegetables is to fry them (not boil them).

That, at least, is according to a study conducted by researchers from the University of Granada and published in Food Chemistry magazine.

Frying improves antioxidant capacity and increases the amount of phenolic compounds, which help to prevent conditions such as diabetes and cancer.

The research does note that you should only use olive oil.

However, I say, what's the harm in using lard?

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Lard Is Good For You

I was hugely gemused to read that some "experts" have now decided that vegetable oils are dangerous for you (yet another cancer causing product), and that they recommend that we should be using olive oil, butter and lard to cook with as they are healthier.

This is what I have been saying all along!

Martin Grootveld, a professor of bioanalytical chemistry and chemical pathology, said that his research showed “a typical meal of fish and chips”, fried in vegetable oil, contained as much as 100 to 200 times more toxic aldehydes than the safe daily limit set by the World Health Organisation.

In contrast, heating up butter, olive oil and lard in tests produced much lower levels of aldehydes.

How interesting that Nanny's NHS advice is to replace “foods high in saturated fat with lower-fat versions” and warns against frying food in butter or lard, recommending instead corn oil, sunflower oil and rapeseed oil. Saturated fats raise cholesterol levels, increasing the risk of heart disease.

Prof Grootveld, of De Montfort University in Leicester, who carried out a series of experiments, is quoted by the Telegraph:

“For decades, the authorities have been warning us how bad butter and lard was. But we have found butter is very, very good for frying purposes and so is lard.

People have been telling us how healthy polyunsaturates are in corn oil and sunflower oil. But when you start messing around with them, subjecting them to high amounts of energy in the frying pan or the oven, they undergo a complex series of chemical reactions which results in the accumulation of large amounts of toxic compounds.”

What should we conclude form this volte farce in what we should/should not eat?

Simple, Nanny's advice should always be ignored as it is bollocks!

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No Buts It's Got To Be Butter!

Knock me down with a feather, after all those years wherein we were bombarded with dire warnings from Nanny about the dangers of saturated fat found in butter, meat or cream it now transpires it's not dangerous at all.

In fact, the real danger lies in food abomination products such as margarine.

A recent study has shown that saturated fat does not increase the risk of stroke, heart disease or diabetes. However trans-fats, found in processed foods like margarine raises the risk of death by 34 per cent.

The new research which looked at 50 studies involving more than one million people found there was no evidence that saturated fat was bad for health.

Variety, not faddy fussyness, is the spice of life!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny Bans Butter

I see that Nanny is having another go at "fat" again.

This time she has set her sights on butter. Her "good practice" guidelines, as per one of her quangos the School Food Trust, states:

"When making sandwiches, try not using any butter or spread if the filling is moist enough. If using fat spread, choose a reduced-fat variety and spread thinly.".

Why not just dip the bread in water and be done with it?

Nanny's scare mongering about the dangers of butter is complete bollocks. Natural fats such as butter, cheese, milk and lard are far better for you than the artificial shit that is packaged as spreadable slurry.

As I have noted many times before, the body is like a car engine; it needs oil in it to prevent it seizing up.

Hence fat in the veins will of course aid the flow of blood!

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

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The Joy of Lard

Nanny's chums in the Food Standards Agency (FSA) are becoming increasingly concerned about our level of fatness, and our eating habits, no change there then!

As such they are going to launch a drive against fat, rumour has it that the FSA are considering warning us about the dangers of cheese sandwiches and buttered toast.

The FSA commissioned consumer research which showed that shock tactics, such as graphic images of furred blood vessels and fat deposits, were the best way to change people's diet.

It seems that this time next year we will have endure yet another one of Nanny's remorseless campaigns warning us about the dangers of our everyday, simple pleasures.

The FSA is rumoured to be considering testing messages that show that ordinary foods (eg meat, dairy, snacks and confectionery) are far higher in saturated fats than people realise.

It seems that they are considering using the same form of warning that is printed on fag packets...and we all know how "effective" they have been!

Nanny and the FSA need to remember that, unlike smoking, we really all do have to eat food everyday. You cannot, and should not, criminalise food and eating!

The warnings will include one informing consumers that two slices of buttered toast contain more saturated fat than four doughnuts, and that one cheese sandwich contains more than half the daily amount of saturated fat.

CMI Research, who prepared the report for the FSA, said:

"Shock tactics show potential.

The researchers said that graphic images of fat had a big impact on consumers they spoke to.

Dramatising the amount of saturated fat in foods in an unexpected and unappetising way proved effective, as almost all were repulsed by the idea of eating lard."

Hang on lads, I am not repulsed by eating lard (beef dripping)!

I like it!

The FSA should remember that the body is like a car engine, just as the engine needs oil to lubricate its moving parts, so does the blood in the body need fat to enable it to travel smoothly between the organs.

We would simply seize up without fat.

Here is a perfect recipe for lard (dripping):

Ingredients

-1 slice of thick cut white bread

-Dripping

-Salt and pepper

Method

-Toast the bread

-Spread a liberal portion of dripping (at least 1 cm thick) onto the toast

-Season copiously with salt and pepper

Enjoy!

Needless to say, the FSA has denied it is considering warnings on packaging. However, it then went on to say that it still had a wide range of consultations to make before deciding how best to convey its message. In other words, they do want to use warning messages and if the public reaction is muted we will get them.

I suggest that you purchase one of these fine T shirts or thongs from The Joy of Lard, just to show Nanny what you think of her plans.



Any profits made will be used to add to my collection of lard and dripping.

Nanny Bans Worrall Thompson

Nanny's best friend, Auntie, has got her knickers in a twist over something that one of her very naughty boys has done.

That "loveable" and cheeky chappie, chef, and all round celeb Anthony Worrall Thompson has gone an upset both Auntie and Nanny.

They are very cross with him, and have administered a severe and thoroughly deserved spanking (that phrase will generate few interesting hits form the search engines!:)).

What has Anthony done to so annoy these two bastions of our moral and physical wellbeing?

Simple, one of his recipes has been deemed just too naughty for public consumption. Rumour has it, that if you even read the ingredients you will immediately gain 10 pounds.

Oooh!

The recipe is called Snickers Pie, and is meant as a sweet treat for children. Just one slice of Snickers Pie contains 1,250 calories.

Now the funny old thing was that Anthony's recipe was happily residing for a while on the BBC website (indeed he actually made the pie on TV two years ago), that is until some interfering busybodies from the Food Commission found it and complained about its calorie content.

They labelled it the most unhealthy pudding ever.

So what?

Auntie was so worried that someone would actually make the dish and eat it, that she removed the recipe.

What a bunch of prats!

It is not Auntie's job to censor recipes, just because they are not to her taste.

Having this dish once or twice a year will not kill you. Should you be stupid enough to eat it every day, then that is you look out; as you will of course die, but then that's your business.

By the way, you may be wondering what the "forbidden" recipe is, here it is, but be warned you will gain 10 pounds just by reading it:

Ingredients

-1 packet puff pastry
-140g/5oz mascarpone
-110g/4oz soft cheese
-50g/2oz caster sugar
-3 eggs
-5 Snickers bars, chopped

Method

Preheat oven to 200C/400/Gas 6

Roll pastry to 3-4mm thick and use to line a 20cm/8in fluted tart tin

Beat the mascarpone, soft cheese and sugar together in a large bowl, until smooth

Beat in eggs, one at a time. Add the Snickers bars and fold in

Pour into lined tart tin, and spread to the edges

Place in the oven for 10 minutes, then lower to 180C/350/Gas 4 for a further 25 minutes until golden and set

Allow to cool before serving

Those of you who don't have a sweet tooth, may enjoy my favourite recipe for maintaining body mass; lard.

Ingredients

-1 pound of lard per person

-Parsley

Method

Open the packet of lard

- Place on a plate

- Garnish with parsley

- Serve immediately

I'm happy because I eat lard!



For other lard related recipes, please visit "Accountants Can Cook".

Nanny's Perfect Christmas Party

With the office Christmas party season now in full swing, Nanny has issued a number of guidelines as to how to hold the "perfect" Nanny Christmas party.








They are summarised below:

• No alcohol should be served, Nanny disapproves of alcohol



• No pork (eg cocktail sausages, scotch eggs, pork pies and sausage rolls) should be served, this may offend certain non Christians



• No meat should be served, this may offend vegetarians



• No mince pies or Christmas puddings should be served. These contain lard and suet, and as such would offend vegetarians



• No mistletoe should be used to decorate the office; this would encourage kissing, which of course could be construed as sexual harassment



• Kissing is banned, for the reason above and because of the risk of spreading avian flu



• Christmas should not be mentioned, and there should be no decorations, as this may offend the non Christians



• No form of dancing or physical contact should take place, as this may be construed as sexual harassment



• No crackers should be pulled, as the explosive content is contrary to Nanny's anti terrorist laws



• No food should be served, as people are far too fat anyway



• No presents should be distributed, as recipients may feel pressured to have sex with the gift giver. Also, presents may be of varying degrees of quality, as such some people may feel discriminated against



• No party games should be held, as some people will be classified as "losers" which of course is very bad for their self esteem



• No photocopiers should be in the vicinity, as people may be tempted to copy their backsides (which of course is a health and safety issue, as well as being construed as sexual harassment)

Happy Christmas everyone!

Nanny to Reintroduce Food Rationing

Nanny, as we know, hates the way that we live our lives. We are fat, lazy and we eat too much of the wrong food.

Nanny feels that she has done her best to try to persuade us to change our lifestyles, yet we seem to be ignoring her. This inattention to her lectures really annoys her.

Well, Nanny is fed up with being ignored, she does “know best”; and has decided that action will be taken.

One of her special friends, Dr Rachel Davey of Staffordshire University, has been thinking about the problem; and has presented Nanny with a special paper that makes a few radical proposals.

Davey’s paper correctly identifies that the more we eat, and the less that we do, the more weight we will gain.

No problems with her most excellent analysis so far.

Now here is where it becomes a little more worrying; she says that when we are confronted with food we are weak willed, and that we will not voluntarily change our habits.

Oh to have Nanny’s moral backbone!

However, do not despair, this is where Nanny will help us.

Dr Davey, who views our current eating habits as “insidious” and likes to use the word "enforce" (let’s not mince words here doctor), proposes a number of “helpful” measures designed to make us fit Nanny’s ideal:

• She proposes taxing certain food items, that Nanny dislikes, much like tobacco and drink are taxed



• She proposes that the advertising of certain food stuff be controlled; in the same way that tobacco and drink advertising is controlled



• She proposes, and this is the real killer, that certain foodstuffs be rationed; just like they were in the war!

Quote:

“..It is not inconceivable that some form of food rationing and portion size control may be required in future if the dramatic rise in obesity continues. This could be done via supermarkets since most of the food we consume in the home is purchased at a relatively small number of food outlets. Obesity is virtually impossible to treat by conventional methods so efforts need to be directed towards prevention. To change social attitudes and challenge social norms, governments must implement radical policy changes which will enforce an environment in which food production, marketing and consumption are controlled…”

During the last war, the British government rationed food via a points system. Everyone was allocated 16 points a month, which they could “spend” on food of their choice. Once the points were used up, they could buy no more.

Dr Davey argues that people were fitter and healthier then; therefore it is the right solution for the “obesity” war that Nanny is fighting on our behalf.

Dare I inject a note of reality into Nanny’s view of history here?

• Rationing was introduced because Britain was at war, people had no choice but to live in this manner; the country was facing starvation, as the U boats cut our supply lines.



• The war lasted 1939-45, rationing persisted until the 1950’s; by which time people were heartily sick of it. The then labour government had to abolish it, or face a mini “revolution”. Oddly enough people don’t like being restricted in their choices, when there is no war to fight.



• During rationing there was a thriving “black market”. Nanny’s attempt to introduce rationing will merely produce the same result. An affluent criminal element in society, which will control the supply of burgers and chips.

By the way regarding the current lard shortage, that is threatening to ruin Christmas for many a British household, I have a pack of lard in my fridge; and am open to offers.



Please submit your bids to lardbid@kenfrost.com, marking them "I love lard".

As ever, with Nanny’s “solutions” to problems, she has not thought through the consequences of her actions; and blatantly disregards the right of people to choose how they wish to live their lives.