Experience Not Welcome

Nanny, despite her self proclaimed wisdom in all matters, has many prejudices. One of these is an innate hatred of independent schools.

This is rather hypocritical, given the fact that many of Nanny’s friends and ministers have gone to independent schools themselves; or send their children to independent schools.

However, in Nanny’s view that is not the issue. She firmly believes that the ordinary members of the British public must send their children to Nanny’s state schools; where they can be taught Nanny’s special curriculum, by Nanny’s specially trained teachers.

Those that go to independent schools are taught to question dogma, independence of thought and to achieve all that is achievable. Nanny abhors these traits in ordinary members of the public.

Sometimes, those who have taught in the independent sector seek to join the state sector. This of course would threaten Nanny’s precious state system; by exposing children to thoughts and ideas that had not been properly approved of by Nanny and her acolytes.

Initially Nanny did not bother to try to disguise her hatred of independent schools; she placed signs, such as the one above, outside all of her schools. These naturally discouraged anyone with independent experience trying to join Nanny’s schools.

However, despite attempts to “dumb down” examinations, standards have fallen dramatically in Nanny’s schools; primarily as a result of Nanny’s obsession with controlling, and regulating, every aspect of the curriculum and day to day management of her schools. The decline in standards has caused many to seek to emulate the independent sector, by trying to bring in teachers from the independents.

Nanny won’t have that, in a splendid display of cunning, she has created a bureaucratic barrier to entry to all of those from the independent sector; who seek employment in her schools.

The barrier comes in the form of the state recognised teaching qualification. Nanny pretends that this is to ensure that only teachers of the “highest calibre” teach in her schools. We all know this to be a lie. Those who have spent many successful years teaching in the independent sector, are in fact banned from joining the state sector; as they do not possess this bureaucratic entry slip.

The absurdity of this artificial barrier to entry was highlighted yesterday by the story that Tristram Jones-Parry, soon to be retiring head of Westminster School, could not get a teaching position in the state sector; because he does not have this bureaucratic entry slip. The fact that there is a severe shortage of teachers in the state system, eg 3500 maths teachers, seemingly counts for nothing.

Nanny doesn’t care; her precious ideals come first, these of course must take precedence over “education, education, education”.