Nanny’s health and safety Gestapo have struck fear into Cummersdale Primary School in Cumbria.
It seems that the Head, Shaun Halfpenny, is afraid that the health and safety Gestapo will cause trouble for the school; if the pupils are allowed to play conkers unprotected.
In view of this fear, the Head has supplied the pupils with goggles; to protect their eyes from conker shards.
I would ask, precisely how many children are blinded each year by flying shards?
The Gestapo have more draconian rules planned for the centuries old game of conkers. I have managed to obtain the secret design plans, created by the health and safety executive, for the new conker protection suit; which will be made compulsory at schools around the country.
This story is a salutary warning about nanny’s methods; she now relies, not only on the law to exercise her will, but fear.
As Mr Halfpenny said to reporters:
"These days you cannot be too careful, especially when health and safety inspectors are watching."
He has expressed, in this sentence, what Britain has become; a nation living in fear of being watched by nanny and her Gestapo.
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