Wednesday, April 29, 2009
I see that our media are really getting worked up over this swine flu "epidemic", so much so in fact that they have stopped placing the "financial meltdown" at the top of the headlines.
I also see that Nanny, in order to be seen to be doing something, has now decided to send every household in the UK a leaflet explaining what to do.
Here is my advice (I am not a doctor), but it is common sense which you should already be doing anyway:
1 Don't waste your money on those masks, they don't work.
2 Wash your hands regularly and thoroughly (something that staff in some of Nanny's hospitals seem to have lost the habit of); especially when coming back inside the house, having handled money, before food and after a loo visit.
3 Eat properly.
4 Avoid touching your eyes, nose or mouth with your hands (or indeed any other organ of your body).
5 Don't live, eat, or sleep with pigs.
6 Continue to enjoy roast pork and pork sausages.
7 Avoid having sex with human beings and pigs.
That's it in a nutshell. I am now going to have a couple of Wall's finest!
BTW, now is a good time to buy hog futures, as when the swine flu "epidemic" turns out to be a storm in a teacup they will rebound.
Please do remember though, I am an accountant not a doctor:)
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