Congratulations to Children's Secretary (why do children need a secretary?) Ed Balls for plumbing new depths of Nannyism.
He has launched and lauded a new website (that cost us £60M).
The site www.begrand.net tells grandparents how to be errmmm..grandparents!
Quote, grandparents often have "strong and sometimes strange opinions".
I assume by that Nanny means that grandparents have common sense, use their initiative and don't listen to Nanny.
The site contains some classic ZaNuLabour bullshit, eg bribe teenagers with a plate of chips if they don't want to eat their greens!
The site tells grandparents what a burn is, and advises grandparents to ring an ambulance if their grandchild collapses.
For fark's sake!
"Pretty much any noise your new grandchild makes can be claimed as the word for you, even if not in your own language. Try 'Zulu,' or Thakur-da’, which it's Bengali for Grandad."
"Abundance is a new-ish term for 'making the most of what you've got.' [It's easy] to forget that winter is a time for the soil to cool, the weeds to die and bulbs to grow in the dark. That spring is planting time; summer and autumn are all about harvest and preserve-making."
"Help your grandchild to walk. No instructions required. Just hold out a hand and be prepared to take a thousand small steps to anywhere – very slowly and for a very long time. You practise patience and they just practise.
This method works when imparting many other skills, from using a spoon to bowling a spin ball. Just be present and accepting while the practising is going on.
Kit required: comfortable shoes."
This has to be the largest piece of patronising BS I have read in a long time.
I really would have thought that the average grandparent would have some skills wrt helping grandchildren walking, calling ambulances and treating burns.
That being said maybe this is actually aimed at the new generation of ZaNuLabour grandparents who are in fact still under 30, because they had their children when they were 12.
Feel free to plunder Balls' site and post other "gems".
I need a stiff drink!
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