The Joy of Coke

This is the sugar laden drink that Tesco won't be banning!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tesco Bans Ribena - Tesco Responds

Following my article yesterday about Tesco banning Ribena, Tesco have sent me a number of responses via Twitter:

@ken_frost From September all the children's lunchbox-size Ribena & Capri Sun we sell (150ml – 300ml) will have no added sugar in them (1)

— Tesco (@Tesco) July 29, 2015

@ken_frost We will continue to sell the full sugar versions in larger bottle sizes (2)

— Tesco (@Tesco) July 29, 2015

@ken_frost We want to help customers make healthier choices & we've pledged to cut sugar from the food & drink on our shelves (3)

— Tesco (@Tesco) July 29, 2015

@ken_frost We are not planning to delist any more lines as part of this commitment. Thanks - Dave

— Tesco (@Tesco) July 29, 2015

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tesco Bans Ribena

It seems that Tesco is so concerned about children's obesity, that it is taking steps to ban certain sugary drinks (eg Ribena and Carpi-sun...is that's some form of motor car from the 70's?) from its stores.

The sugary drinks aimed at children will be replaced by no-added-sugar alternatives.

Ironically the "non sugar" alternatives include crisps, which are in fact loaded with sugar.

There's irony for you!

As to whether this stems childhood obesity, I doubt it will have any effect whatsoever. Ribena et al can be bought elsewhere. Additionally, Ribena is not the prime cause of obesity.

Will Tesco be banning Coke?

No I thought not!

I drank Ribena as a kid (either with water or milk). I am not obese, I have all my own teeth and I am not diabetic. That being said, I didn't drink it everyday morning noon and night!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny Berates Boris's Bike Backie

Oh dear, Boris Johnson has fallen foul of Nanny and her health and safety zealots.

For why?

He gave his wife, Marina, a "backie" on his bike while cycling in London.

Cue the howls of outrage from safety campaigners who were quick to point out that giving a backie is illegal under the terms of the 1998 Road and Traffic Act. Offenders can be fined up to £200.

Seemingly footage of Boris and his wife was obtained by the Sun newspaper (which I would have thought had its hands full with other footage at the moment). It was shot by passengers in a passing car, as the couple cycled along a road in North Kensington.

They can be heard in the video asking Boris (source BBC):

 "Mate, you all right? Saddling, that's a good one, eh?

You're not allowed to do that, mate."

Kerching as they duly pass on the footage to The Sun!

Meanwhile many cyclists happy break the law everyday, by running red lights and hurtling down pavements at breakneck speed endangering anyone who has the temerity to get in their way!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Hi-Viz For Cows

Kudos to Nanny for coming up with one her most absurd ideas yet, hi-viz jackets for cows.

Hungerford Council were concerned about the health and safety aspects of cows wandering the local roads at night, lest they be hit by a car.

The suggestion made was for the cows to wear hi-viz clothing and, at the suggestion of the mayor, lights strung round their necks!

Suffice to say, the local farmers think that this idea is bollocks. As one farmer pointed out, cows don't always conveniently stand at 90 degrees to an oncoming car. Sometimes cows stand facing the vehicle, as such a hi-viz jacket would not be seen.

The sensible solution is for there to be traffic calming measures, so vehicles are not roaring round the danger areas at night at insane speeds.

Roger Denton, one of the farmers, is quoted by the Telegraph:

“The thing about fluorescent collars is that they’d only get them off anyway and litter them all over the common.”

Nanny needs a strong dose of common sense!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny Hates Fags, But Loves Ash

In case you were worried that Nanny is wasting your money, fear not.

As per Hansard, Action on Smoking and Health (ASH) an alleged "charity" has been raking it in from us taxpayers for many years!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Sugar Is Evil

Nanny and the food fascists have donned their jackboots again, this time they are marching to war against sugar.

A reports by the Scientific Advisory Committee on Nutrition (SACN) wants to government to "instruct" adults and children to halve the amount of sugar they consume and eat almost twice as much pasta, potato and other fibrous foods.

Oh yes?

When did government edicts wrt what we eat ever make a positive impact on people's habits/lives?

Any such edict will simply piss people off and make them even more reluctant to adjust their eating habits.

Nutritionists said that people conforming to the new guidelines would need to make "extreme changes" to their diets. The proposed limit on sugar, 25g for women and 35g for men, is the equivalent of a single can of coca-cola a day - and no other sugary food at all.

Analysis obtained by The Telegraph suggests that the thresholds will leave almost no space for treats and will require the consumption of eight portions of fruit and vegetables a day, rather than the five recommended now.

Humans are not robots, they are fallible creatures who enjoy "decadence". Extreme nutritional diktats such as this are guaranteed to fail!


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Stating The Obvious On Brighton Beach

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Hand Drier Safety Advice

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Ice Age Coming

As we enjoy a typically lack lustre British summer, those of you who are worried about global warming will be pleased to know that it is bollocks.

Seemingly, according to solar researchers from the university of Northumbria, the earth is 15 years from a "mini ice-age" that will cause bitterly cold winters during which rivers such as the Thames freeze over,

Thus validating what Nationwide reported back in the mid seventies!
 

Fluid movements within the sun, which are thought to create 11-year cycles in the weather, will converge in such a way that temperatures will fall dramatically in the 2030s.

Solar activity will fall by 60 per cent as two waves of fluid "effectively cancel each other out", according to Prof Valentina Zharkova.

Therefore if you don't want to freeze in 15 years time, start using more fossil fuels and ensure you maximise your greenhouse gas emissions!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny Bans Banner

Commiserations to The Carron Fish Bar in Stonehaven, Aberdeenshire, home of the deep fried Mar's Bar.

Nanny, in the shape of Aberdeenshire Council, has taken exception to the banner outside the shop that proudly proclaims it invented the deep friend Mars Bar.

Nanny wants the banner removed.

For why?

"For the good of the community"

What the fark does that mean?

Carron Fish Bar owner, Lorraine Watson, is quoted by the BBC as saying that the proposed ban was "ridiculous" and she would "definitely not" be taking the banner down.

"Thousands and thousands of tourists come from all over the world to purchase the deep fried Mars bar from the birthplace.

They stand outside under the banner with their Mars bar, smiling from ear to ear, then go home and let all their friends and family see it.

We have no idea why the council would want this banner taken down, bearing in mind it takes thousands of visitors to the town.

Isn't that what we are trying to do? Aren't we trying to boost tourism in Scotland?"

Aberdeenshire Council issued Mrs Watson with a letter:

"Following a thorough walkabout and inspection, an action plan has been drawn up.

Many of the actions would fall to individual property owners and one of them relates to your property. What needs to be done: Remove banner."

A spokesman for Aberdeenshire Council said:

"Together with a range of community organisations we have been looking at ways to improve the look of Stonehaven for the benefit of residents, businesses and visitors. 

An action plan has been created in conjunction with the Stonehaven Town Partnership, Community Council, Stonehaven Business Association and the Horizon Group.

As part of the action plan we have asked some owners in the area to consider making alterations to their properties. This included asking the owners of The Carron Fish Bar to consider removing their banner.

We do not wish to prevent the owners from promoting their business and we would be happy to have discussions with them regarding the banner."

Leave the banner in place, and stop being so anal about it!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Auntie Knows Best

BBC using licence fee payers’ cash to lobby MPs not to cut the licence fee. Smooth. http://t.co/kcS7cE4A5v pic.twitter.com/tyELlPobnt

— Guido Fawkes (@GuidoFawkes) July 16, 2015

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Brighton Hates Fags - Beach Smoking To Be Banned

As loyal readers know, Nanny's virulent hatred of fags knows no bounds. However, kudos to Brighton and Hove council for excelling even Nanny's rabid hatred of fags and making utter knobheads of themselves.

It transpires that Brighton and Hove could become one of the first places in the UK to ban smoking in its parks and on its beaches.

Councillors are being asked to approve a public consultation, to extend the voluntary ban in playgrounds to other public spaces in the city.

Cllr Daniel Yates, chair of Health and Wellbeing Board, is quoted by Brighton and Hove News:

“The health benefits of smoke free areas and protecting children from second-hand smoke are well established.

We’re keen to keep people safe from the effects of smoking in public areas, especially children who are most vulnerable. However we also want to ensure any measures taken have support of residents in the city. The report is a welcome addition to the meeting agenda.”

What utter bollocks!

It is not at all well established that passive smoking is in anyway harmful in the open air.

Maybe he should direct his attention to the toxic effects of the congested roads of Brighton instead!

The areas being proposed to become smoke free, following consultation, are locations where children are most likely to be present, especially during school holidays at times when the parks and beaches are busiest.

The plans are due to go before the city council’s health and wellbeing board next Tuesday, 21 July. If agreed, the consultation will run from the 22 July for 12 weeks.

In the event that these proposals become law, I would like to ask the council how the fark they intend to enforce the rules?

I ask, because the beach is farking long and has, in peak season, over 40,000 visitors per day. 

 

It is ironic that the council are so keen to divert its staff and the police to enforce a smoking ban on the beach; because they have done fark all to stop abusive drinkers, drug takers, tent communes etc from blighting the beachfront and city's parks over the past few years. 

 

There was even a rave on the beach the other week, that left in its wake 60 used needles, broken glass, vomit, urine and human faeces. Where were the police, council and local media when this was on and when the people who have businesses on the beachfront were left to clean up the shit?

Congratulations to Brighton and Hove council, well deserving Knobheads of The Millennium!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Charity or Business?

There has been a fuss in the media recently over the resignation of Camila Batmanghelidjh, from her position of CEO of a charity Kids Company that she founded.

It transpires the heart of the issue relates to non payment by the charity of nearly £700K of unpaid National Insurance to HMRC in 2003.

HMRC has written off £589,587 of the amount owed (at the taxpayers' expense) and Nanny, it seems, will hand over £3M of taxpayers' money to continue to fund the charity.

Laurence Guinness, director of communications at Kids Company, is quoted by the Third Sector saying that the charity had:

"experienced a delay in making National Insurance payments to HMRC as resources were focused on meeting the immediate needs of a high number of vulnerable children with complex needs who were not receiving statutory support".

A "delay"?

Twelve years??

When does a charity cease to be a charity, and become a business?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Fags Before Food

@TenNewsSydney a lot of places are just banning eating outside and letting the smoking continue pic.twitter.com/VAiQ4XgrcN

— andrew reed (@andrewreeeeeeed) July 10, 2015

Congratulations to Australian Nanny for making a prat of herself.

She has banned smoking in commercial dining areas.

Can you guess what the response of many organisations has been?

Yes, that's right, they have banned eating outside so that people may continue to smoke!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

A Generation of Ignoramuses

Today marks the 75th anniversary of the Battle of Britain.

In a poll of 1,000 people conducted by the RAF Benevolent Fund one in ten 18 to 24-year-olds thought the Battle took place last year, with the same number thinking it was a Viking attack when presented with multiple choice answers.

What the fark is Nanny teaching kids in schools these days?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny Bans Soap

The Telegraph reports an interesting case that came to court over a man who washed a kid's mouth out with soap (a rather popular Victorian punishment for "potty mouths"), and the mother's reaction not accepting that her son had done wrong.

Here is the article in full:

"A man washed a child's mouth out with soap after the youngster swore at him and tried to kick an old man's walking stick, a court heard. 

Ryan Birtwell, 23, spotted the six-year-old's behaviour in a park near his home and confronted him.

Birtwell had seen the boy kick an elderly man's cane and told him to stop - but the youth told him to "f*** off" and called him a "gay boy", a court heard. 

Birtwell then walked into a nearby shop and bought a three pack of soap and pinned the boy down and stuck a bar in his mouth.

The boy told his family about the incident on April 11 in Washington, Sunderland, and they contacted police.

Birtwell pleaded guilty to assault at Sunderland Magistrates' Court and was given a 12-month conditional discharge and ordered to pay £85 court costs and a £15 victim surcharge. 

Jason Smith, mitigating, said: "Ryan is walking along the road minding his own business. 

"He is a young man who is very affable. He sees the boy run across to an old gentleman with a stick and tries to kick the stick away. 

"He remonstrates with him to which the boy - who the police, I have to say, accept that he is slightly out of control and perhaps not the best of young individuals - says to Ryan to f*** off. 

"Ryan says to him to stop swearing and when he doesn't he says back 'stop swearing or I will wash your mouth with soap,' something that used to happen in the good old days. 

"He fully accepts in hindsight that that was not the best way to react. All Ryan was trying to do was teach the little boy some manners. Unfortunately, manners are in short supply nowadays." 

The court on Wednesday heard that a witness said Birtwell, of Washington, had been called a "gay boy" by the youth. 

The witness heard Birtwell say he was going to buy some soap and "wash his mouth out with it". 

Prosecutor Glenda Beck said: "The injured party was playing in the park which is close to his home address. The defendant approached him and there was an exchange of words. 

"The defendant went to a shop and returned with a bar of soap. He pinned the injured party down to the floor and pushed the bar of soap into his mouth." 

Speaking after the hearing the boy's mother said: "Things are not as bad as have been said. 

"I admit that my son swore and he was wrong for that, but like I said to the police at the time, kids do that kind of thing. 

"At the end of the day, he is a 23-year-old bloke who has assaulted a six-year-old. The sentence is a joke."


Peter Bradley, director of Kidscape, which tackles bullying and safeguarding issues in relation to children, said both Birtwell and the boy could learn a lesson. 

He said: "I think the main message that people should take from this case is that adults are adults and they should act appropriately when dealing with children. 

"If a child is acting in the wrong manner then it has to be dealt with in the appropriate ways. 

"In this instance, without doubt Ryan was wrong, but hopefully some support has been put in place so that this boy can learn from his actions too." 

It seems to me jamming a bar of soap into a kid's mouth is a lot less violent than the scenes we witness everyday on beaches, supermarkets etc; where parents scream foul abuse at their screaming kids, in the deluded expectation that this will somehow calm them down and restore discipline.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

The £8K Orange Peel

Kudos to Broxbourne Borough Council for making utter knobheads of themselves (and costing taxpayers £8K), over a farcical dispute regarding a dropped orange peel.

Luke Gutteridge accidentally dropped an orange peel (which is biodegradable), then binned it immediately and apologised to the Broxbourne Borough Council-contracted officer.

Can you guess what happened next children?

Yes, that's right, Mr Gutteridge was fined £75.

Instead of bending over and taking it, Mr Gutteridge went to court.

Suffice to say the case was dismissed, and the council claimed that lessons would be learnt.

Pah!

Tim Hutchins, Broxbourne council member for environmental protection, is quoted by the BBC:

"Clearly we thought we had sufficient evidence to bring this case. The costs were not awarded against us and I think that's a fair indication the court believed the case had been properly brought."

Bollocks, they lost and the costs of Mr Guterridge's defence will be met by the taxpayer.

As the Budget is delivered today (see live tweets here), many councils will bleat and snivel about the cuts they will have to bear. However, do not forget that councils are very wasteful of our money and cannot be trusted to run a piss up brewery!

Councils are very good at spending other people's money!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

The Dangers of Biscuits

Oh dear, it seems that owing to Nanny's Home Orifice rules Norfolk police were forced to record an incident of a man being hit by a biscuit as a “violent crime”.

The victim was hit by the biscuit after a minor disagreement with a woman, and was left with “small red mark”.

Stephen Bett, the Police and Crime Commissioner, is quoted by the Telegraph:

“You could not make this up – it’s jaw-dropping.

I am sure people will find these examples of what the police are having to record as violent crime hard to believe to say the least.

I frankly couldn’t believe what I was reading. Is it any wonder we have seen a rise in recorded violent crime in Norfolk if these types of incidents have to be logged?”

In other cases a child who was brushed across the arm with a stinging nettle by another child was also recorded as ABH (actual bodily harm).

A Norfolk Police spokesman said:

"National crime recording standards give the police a duty to record these incidents as crimes in Norfolk. However, we have a measured approach to how we deal with them.

Just because we record these as crimes, it will not always be appropriate to arrest or seek to prosecute the alleged offenders.

It is very much dependant on the individual circumstances of each report."

The country has gone truly mad!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Lunchbox Searches

I see that Nanny wants to enforce compulsory searches of kids' lunchboxes (involving two teachers), wherein evil foods and drinks are confiscated and possibly destroyed.

On the list of "evil" foods are Scotch Eggs!

FFS!

Scotch Eggs are nutritious and tasty.

Who comes up with what constitutes the "right" or "wrong" kind of food?

When I was a nipper my lunchbox contained crisps, banana sarnies and lemonade (or the equivalent). I never became obese, hyperactive or suffer from health issues.

This is just potty, and will give kids complexes about what they are eating!

I can barely believe folk will stand for this Nazism pic.twitter.com/JQNs52Zjye

— Tabitha (@VinegarStrokes) July 1, 2015

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

The Dangers of Foxes - Protect Your Groins!

As per the BBC:

A "vicious" fox trapped eight people inside a sports club for three hours as it stalked them from the car park.

The animal appeared as people were preparing to leave Alconbury Sports and Social Club, Cambridgeshire.
Panic reigned, with a woman being bitten, a man falling off his bicycle as he was chased and a pest controller being pursued back to his car.
Club chairman Bruce Staines, who was chased around the car park, said he had "never seen anything like it".
Mr Staines admitted he "tweaked his groin" trying to get away from the marauding animal and back to the safety of the club.
"None of us could get out. When we tried to use a side door, the fox heard and came haring round there."

'Wasn't afraid'

A woman who tried to distract the fox with food sustained a bite to her hand.
A man who tried to outpace the creature on his bicycle was chased into a field and fell off, losing his glasses in the process.
"He had to fend the fox off with his bicycle," Mr Staines said.

The fox trapped people inside the club for about three hours, stalking them from the car park

Club members ended up barricaded inside the building, watching the fox on the CCTV system as it stalked outside, at about 22:00 BST on Saturday.
The local pest controller was called, but when he tried to approach the animal it "went for him" and chased him back to his car.
The fox was eventually caught and destroyed.

The pest controller's view

Graeme Brown, a pest controller for 18 years, was called in to help those trapped inside the club.
"The fox started circling my car as soon as I arrived," he said.
He tried to move it on by stamping his feet, shouting and waving his arms but when it refused to move he was "forced to beat a retreat".
He said he had "never come across such a forward and aggressive fox as this one".
"People who don't know about these animals should not approach them and never feed them. You're asking to be bitten.
"Leaving this fox was not an option. I have no doubt about that," he said.
"It was active in the area of a play park and I would not be prepared to put children at risk."

"Foxes can look very sweet, but as a family-orientated club we had real concerns about this rather vicious animal. We have hundreds of children playing in our leagues here," Mr Staines said.
He said the pest controller suggested the fox may have been an urban animal, which somehow found itself in the middle of the countryside.
"That might be why it wasn't at all afraid of humans."
Neither the Wildlife Trust nor RSPCA was prepared to comment on the behaviour of the fox as their staff had not seen the animal.

Protect your groins!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny's Damp Squib "Heatwave"

Despite Nanny's hysteria over the last few days about the so called "heatwave". Wherein she lectured us to hydrate, keep cool and stay inside if we were vulnerable; I am not aware of thousands of corpses littering the streets dead from "heat".

In fact the last couple of days of warm weather have now given way to rain, it's pissing down here on the South coast.

Panic over!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny's Loaded Fag Survey

According to Chesterfield Royal Hospital:

"We all know that smoking harms and kills - and we know the harm that passive smoking does to other people.  We also know that people smoke on site at Chesterfield Royal Hospital every single day."

Pah!

The arrogance of a statement that begins "We all know" speaks volumes about Nanny's chums there.

To this end the hospital has launched an online survey, designed to get the required results that bans smoking everywhere. The hospital also wants to ban patients from leaving the wards to smoke:

"Do you think patients staying in our hospital after an operation, or after an emergency admission should be able to leave the ward to smoke?"

A fine example of a loaded survey!

Feel free to have your say via this link.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

"Heatwave"

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries