Climbdown - Nanny Likes Flowers

Loyal readers will recall that last Thursday I wrote about the problems that Brain and Janna Coomber were having with Nanny:

"...after several years of doing the floral decorations (for free) at Weymouth railway station they have been told by Nanny to stop it.

For why?

Nanny fears for their health and safety wrt their use of a ladder for filling the hanging planters ."

Can you guess what happened next children?

Yes, that's right, following the furore Nanny has backed down and has told them that they can carry on doing the flowers.

What happened?

Well, seemingly a risk assessment has now been conducted which has given the all clear; additionally South West Trains claims that there was a "misunderstanding".

LOL!

Nothing to do with the adverse publicity then?

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The Dangers of Bunting

2012 will be a busy year for celebrations and parties, not only do we have the Olympics but we also have the Queen's Diamond Jubilee and yet another lavish TV series by Lord Fellowes to watch.

All of these events are prompting people to plan street parties.

Needless to say Nanny has poked her bony finger into the planned celebrations. She is worried about the hanging of bunting, and has demanded that those who wish to hang bunting go on professional  health and safety courses that teach them how to mount (or is it climb?) ladders.

For good measure these courses will also teach us how to carry out the risk assessments required to put up tables for a street market.

FFS!!!!

Thus the good people of Petersfield Hampshire will have to attend a course called Safety With Ladders, which covers the Health and Safety Executive Work at Height Regulations 2005.

The hapless participants are shown how to set up a barrier around a ladder to stop people bumping into it, and how to position someone at the bottom of it to warn others the ladder is there.

Needless to say, there is a charge for the course.

£320!

Ker Farking Ching!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

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Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Booze Matters - Minimum Price For Booze

Cameron, despite opposition from within his own cabinet (Lansley describes the plan as "absurd"), is determined to push ahead with plans for a minimum price for booze.

He is of the view that cheap booze is responsible for a minority of the country behaving irresponsibly.

Well, coming from a member of the Palace of Westminster which serves taxpayer subsidised booze at all hours of day and night (wherein a member was recently arrested for alcohol fuelled violence) maybe he is speaking from experience.

However, statistics would indicate (contrary to what Nanny would have us believe) that, as a country, we are actually drinking less. In September 2010 the BBC reported:

"Alcohol consumption in 2009 saw the sharpest year-on-year decline since 1948, figures from the British Beer and Pub Association (BBPA) suggest.

The data showed a 6% fall in 2009 - the fourth annual drop in five years.

The association said UK drinkers were now consuming 13% less alcohol than in 2004, below the EU average.

Pubs, bars, off-licences, restaurants and supermarkets all saw alcohol sales fall, the HM Revenue and Customs data from UK producers and importers showed.

It is thought the decline may be due to the effect of the recession on spending, but could also be a sign that messages about responsible drinking have affected drinking habits.

The organisation said UK taxes on beer remained the second highest duty rate in EU - 10 times higher than in Germany and seven times higher than in France."

The alcohol fuelled violence that certain city centres see at night is down to a number of factors. However, two factors are key:

1 Certain people, no matter how little they have to drink, will behave like "animals" (my apologies to the animal kingdom); whilst the majority of us (even after an "elegant sufficiency") still manage to not smash a bottle over someone else's head or expose our arses.

2 Local councils, by allowing streets to become purely bar only ghettos, have created this problem because of their greed for licence fees etc. A mixed high street of shops, accommodation, restaurants, pubs, bars etc will attract a broad cross section of society rather than the knuckle dragging retards that swarm like flies over shit to bar only ghettos.

Minimum pricing will avail Cameron nothing.

Oh, and by the way, it's not just those who drink "Ace" lager from cans in the street that necessarily cause violent disorder; rumour has it that those overloaded on Krug etc (ie those for whom prices mean nothing) can also be a tad "boisterous"!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny Hates Flowers

On the subject of flowers, as Lord of Atlantis pointed out yesterday, Nanny does seem to have something of a grudge against them.

As Brian and Janna Coomber discovered recently, when after several years of doing the floral decorations (for free) at Weymouth railway station they have been told by Nanny to stop it.

For why?

Nanny fears for their health and safety wrt their use of a ladder for filling the hanging planters.

What a sad, petty and timid little country we have become!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny Bans Daffodils

Spring has sprung, the trees are budding, the sap is rising and the daffodils are growing in all parts of the septic isle, aside from Tendring that is.

For why?

Just ask Robert Blyth, who owns a farm in Ardleigh.

Mr Blyth has been required by Nanny's chums from Tendring District council to submit a seven-page document for permission to plant "a seasonal display of flowers" (daffodils) at his farm.

This being a council that he is dealing with, he will have to wait weeks before a decisions is made; by then the flowers will have withered and died.

Were he to go ahead and allow the daffodils to bloom without asking for permission, the council would have fined him £2,500.

Ker Farking Ching!

(Actually Nanny already has form with daffodils, in 2005 Strood civic centre banned them for being "politically biased").

Anyhoo, Tendring District Council claim that the 13,000 bulb display (which spells out the name of the farm's weekly boot sale) is an advertisement, and therefore needs to be approved.

That is a bit rich, given that the council have such a display showing the council logo on Clacton seafront!

So what happens if the permission is refused?

The plants will have died by then anyway!

Hypocritical, idiotic jobsworths!

Councils are the enemies of the people!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Nanny Bans Best Friends

I wrote yesterday about how I have become somewhat "enured (there's a word I don't use often enough) to Nanny's idiocies". However, a mere one day later I found myself yet again issuing forth a "trumpet of rage".

Two tabloids are claiming that some schools are banning primary pupils from having best friends, and instead are being encouraged to play in large groups.

For why?

Apparently, if the story is true, Nanny claims that she doesn't want the children to "suffer the pain of break up".

Well now, if the above is true, then that is the most absurd nonsense to ever issue forth from the bowels of Nanny's diseased mind:

1 Children can only develop into mature, well balanced adults, if they are allowed to experience life's knock backs.

Those who are covered in cotton wool end up becoming spoilt, self obsessed, immature adults (you only have to look at the emotionally retarded/stunted idiots who appear on reality television to see the level of immaturity in some adults).

2 It's not the state's business to interfere in bondings/falling outs between children.

3 "Playing in groups" and "group activities" was exactly the same policy used by Nazi Germany to ensure that people were never alone or able to speak/think for themselves (going against the group is much harder).

Seemingly, if the story is true, this policy has been used at schools in Kingston, South West London, and Surrey.

Please can someone send me the names of the schools were this is happening?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries