Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Nanny Bans Ice Cream Vans

Ice Cream
As summer approaches we cast our mind back to the halcyon days of summers past, the sound of leather upon willow (that's cricket folks) and the merry jingle of the ice cream van.

Sadly, if Nanny's cums in her "respected" local councils have their way, the sound of ice cream vans may be but a distant faded memory.

For why?

Nanny has decreed that:

1 The sound of the jingles and general commotion of children queuing to buy ice cream is a nuisance, and

2 Ice cream makes people fat, therefore it should not be sold.

Harrow Council is leading the anti ice cream van vendetta, by refusing to issue new vending licences to ice cream sellers and encouraging police to enforce the embargo.

Kypros Kimonos, a purveyor of ices etc, was recently on the receiving end of Nanny's bully boy tactics. The police threatened to arrest him because he didn't have a licence.

Can he get a licence?



Because the council won't issue any new ones!

Angela Mawle, of the UK Public Health Association, said:

"Ice cream is a fattening product, a luxury item. Councils need to start thinking about how they can promote healthy communities."

Why is this the council responsibility?

Who gave them the right to dictate our gut size?

Will all other fattening foods be banned, eg chips, lard, hotdogs, food in general?

All food, if eaten in sufficient quantities, is fattening!

Ice cream can be bought from shops, will councils ban that too?

These councils, and their patsies from the so called "health profession", are behaving like little Hitlers; it is time that they were dealt with in the same manner that we dealt with Herr Shickelgruber and his chums!

Needless to say, Harrow is a Conservative council.

You know the drill folks, tell Cameron that he will lose the next election unless he gets these idiots to realise that we are fed up with the state telling us how to live our lives.

Here's David Cameron's email to tell him what you think:

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store. is brought to you by "The Living Brand"

Celebrate the joy of living with champagne. Click and drink!

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries


  1. Disgusted, Tunbridge Wells10:34 AM

    "Councils need to start thinking about how they can promote healthy communities"

    If they are really serious about promoting healthy communities then our Town Hall Obergruppenfuhrers could make a start by not selling off OUR swimming pools, leisure centres and playing fields to spiv developers in exchange for well-stuffed brown envelopes. I wouldn't mind but most councillors and officers I see are fat, unhealthy bastards whose idea of exercise is pressing the buttons on their TV remotes.

    Don't forget that many of the overpaid, underworked wankers responsible for this sort of decision have been Common Purpose brainwashed.

  2. Lord of Atlantis11:20 AM

    Well said, 'Disgusted Tunbridge Wells'! This nonsense, combined with the closure and selling off to property developers of swimming pools, leisure centres and playing fields, shows the utter hypocrisy of many of our local authorities. They don't give a toss about the health, wellbeing or happiness of their residents; this is simply about control. I can only assume that the sad little Hitlers who came up with this were never able to enjoy icecream when they were young and, now they are in a position of power want to ensure nobody else can.
    There are far greater nuisances than the chimes of an icecream van, which council jobsworths ignore.
    As for the action of the police, that would be right, they are only too willing to help enforce these petty rules with the full force of the law; it's a pity they cannot be so meticulous when it comes to dealing with real crime such as burglary, drugs, violent behaviour etc.

  3. I agree with D,TW.

    There seems to be far too many people that have taken upon themselves the responsibility of looking after me.....Whatever happened to personal responsibility? Are people too pathetic or uneducated to be able to look after themselves?

    Another thing I noticed along a similar theme is this, whilst shopping at my local supermarket, I found that they had stopped selling dripping; can you believe it?...I always use dripping for my roast spuds on Sundays because they taste so good cooked in it...The supermarket sells white vegetable fat,(Ukkk) a selection of oils, lard and Ghee but no dripping. I asked one of the drones why and she said there is no call for it. I asked her if there was more of a call for ghee then and she declined to comment. I have written to their head office as I want to be able to purchase dripping and since the large supermarket came to town, the local small butchers have closed due to lack of trade.

    I suspect in ten years time our entire lives will be dictated by the big supermarkets. One of the large supermarkets has just opened a massive home and wear store locally to us....They sell DVD players for under £15....How can a small retailler compete with that? Once all retail businesses are put out of business, then the large supermarkets will put their prices up and dictate, guided by Nanny, what we can and can't buy....For our own good of course!!

    Mmmm, I feel better for having got that off my chest.....I feel the need for some unhealthy food and some alcohol now:-)

  4. Anonymous2:47 PM

    The larger issue is the governments interference in a mans ability to make a living. Interference in free enterprise. Same stuff starting to happen here in the US. I wonder if we hadnt already been to the moon, if the US still has what it takes for that kind of adventure and ingenuity. I wonder if Britains finest hour could be repeated today, were a similar threat issued.


  5. Old Greeny4:16 PM

    Dear me, Debs, yes of course we can still repeat our finest hourIt may be a slightly different response this time, though. I could see Hitler's Panzer divisions rolling acorss the green fields of England and the Luftwaffe circling in the sky...And then "'Elf 'n' Safety" turn up, along with their cavarly brigades of Anti-Smokers and other do-gooders. "No, Mr Hitler, I'm afraid you can't drive past this school at such a speed in your nasty, polluting tank! And think of the carbon footprint of those nasty, smelly Me109's and Ju88'! AND, what's more, I do believe that your troops are SMOKING in direct contravention of whatever it is they have contravened. Now, please be a good chap and go back to your Fatherland". Although since Hitler was a fanatical anti-smoker as well as being a not very nice chap, maybe they would welcome him with open arms?

  6. I bet they won't dare to take the same draconian view of amplified calls to Muslim prayers, which are far more of an anti-social nuisance than ice cream vans.

  7. Tonk.7:02 PM

    Perhaps one of the committe members owns a shop that sells icecream and doesn't want the competition!!

  8. Now, if Nanny could manage to mount (can ı say "mount"?) a CCTV camera on top of each ice cream van, and use the ice cream itself to bribe her little minions into spying on their neighbors, and for that matter, their families, then perhaps Nanny would see the value in ice cream vans after all.

  9. John Steed10:47 AM

    Look at your local councillers all fat bastards to a man. Nice 4 star lunches at the town and county hall (been there and seen it when working for a local paper on many occasions) and then lecturing us on how to "eat our greens like good children."

    Now, if the vans were selling halal meat bet the only squealing would come from the butchered animals not the councils.

  10. John Steed noted:

    "Now, if the vans were selling halal meat bet the only squealing would come from the butchered animals not the councils."

    How about ice cream vans selling halal ice cream ? It tastes exactly the same as any other ice cream and could be used to completely screw up nanny. Why, well, she bans ice cream then someone points out it is halal and therefore banning it is offensive to Muslims. Instant confusion and nanny all in a tizzy as she wants to ban it but cannot without causing offence.

    Oh and the halal pistachio ice cream sold by our friendly local purveyors of such items is really rather pleasant stuff.

  11. Anonymous1:45 PM

    Kaptain and I am sure the money raised by your 'friendly halal muslim store' is greatly appreciated by our troops when their percentage (as regulated by thier 'religion' is sent to 'muslim charities' that charitably supply money for weapons to kill our boys and girls.

    Have not bought anyhting from muslim owned businesses in years and no I am not BNP!

  12. Julius Caesar2:24 PM

    Naturally not that wouldn't be politically correct now would it?

  13. Anonymous said:

    "Kaptain and I am sure the money raised by your 'friendly halal muslim store' is greatly appreciated by our troops when their percentage (as regulated"

    In this case that will be Asda then as they are the local purveyors of halal food. The pistachio ice cream was required by Mrs Von for a recipe and only available as a halal product, a somewhat strange state of affairs.

    I find it somewhat ironic that Asda, owned by Wal-Mart (American company) are the biggest providers of halal food in my area...not exactly noted for its large muslim population :) Almost as odd as Asda requiring id for tea spoons when the parent company is happy to sell guns and all sorts of other lethal weaponry.

  14. They are a pain to listen to, and they come around at late hours too
    I noticed in the rich areas they do not use loud jingles
    It is fine i guess if the van did not park outside my house