Oxford's New Portraits

Oxford University is revealing the identities of more than 20 people whose portraits will be put on display to try to "promote greater diversity".

It wants to redress the balance from the university's walls being lined with pictures of "dead white males" by adding more women and ethnic minorities.

Nothing wrong with that, and all perfectly laudable. However, couldn't they have found an ex alumni a little more inspiring than Esther Rantzen?

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Exactly How Stupid Are people?

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How To Beat Nanny's One Glass a Day Rule

Kudos to Jam Raquion, who lives in Ilocos Norte in the Philippines, who has stuck two fingers up to Nanny wrt Nanny's rules on drinking:

"That moment when your parents or doctor tell you to only drink a glass of soda, or wine, or beer, or any other booze a day, so you get a glass that could actually satisfy your needs."

Sorted!

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Nanny Hates Hot Chocolate

I see that the interfering busybodies from CASH (Consensus Action on Salt and Health) have found another food source, allegedly loaded with salt, to whine about.

This time it turns out that a mug of hot chocolate can have more salt than a packet of ready salted crisps, according to CASH.

Seemingly Galaxy Ultimate Marshmallow Hot Chocolate powder had just over 0.6g of salt per 25g serving - or 2.5g per 100g - more than the 0.15g per 100g target.

Mars Chocolate, quite rightly pointed out that the drink was an "indulgent treat". However, as the BBC notes, but Public Health England (jumping on the CASH coattails) said more work was needed.

A standard 32.5g packet of Walkers Ready Salted Crisps contains 0.46g of salt.

All very well. However, as I have noted many times before, if you are healthy, drink a good amount of liquid and are not sedentary your body will excrete any excess salt via sweat and urine.

That aside, simply add extra sugar to counteract the salt!

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What a Load of Shite!

My thanks to a loyal reader who sent me a link to this Twitter account End St Patrick's Day:

"The official twitter account for the coordinated effort to end St. Patrick's Day are raise awareness of the fact that it is a holiday based in white pride."

 What a load of shite!

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Health and Safety Training

How would you rescue this "gentleman" without risking splashback?

Proof, if ever it was needed, that we are dumbing down hour by hour!


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Watch Out, There's A Thieving Git About!

Professional crooks 😟 pic.twitter.com/zzuYUTUy5m

— #bentsystem 🤠 (@classicmercsid) March 15, 2017

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Big Brother's Vibrator

You have doubtless heard about the CIA tapping into Samsung TVs to spy on people, now it seems it is not just technically sophisticated gadgets such as TVs that are used to spy on you, but even the humble vibrator!

We-Vibe products (sex toys controlled via a smartphone app) have been spying on users, and sending data back to the product manufacturers.

The Telegraph reports that Canadian firm Standard Innovation, has agreed to pay C$4 million (£2.4 million) to members of the public who bought and used its We-Vibe products.

The firm, it was discovered, had been collecting data via the app, recording when customers had been using the sex toys, as well as information about the intensity of the vibration settings used. The data was collected without customers having been notified.

The court filing, made on behalf of two anonymous female We-Vibe users, said:

“Unbeknownst to its customers … (Standard Innovation) designed We-Connect to collect and record highly intimate and sensitive data regarding consumers’ personal We-Vibe use, including the date and time of each use and the selected vibration settings, and transmit such usage data — along with the users’ personal email address — to its servers in Canada.”

You have been warned!

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Stick and Flick Shit

Dog owners should adopt a "stick and flick" method instead of using shit bags, according to advice from the Forestry Commission.

Discarded plastic dog waste bags are an eyesore, the organisation says, and the best approach should a pet foul on a footpath is to find a stick and flick it into the undergrowth.

The guidance was highlighted by Conservative MP Anne Main.

Now this is all very well and good, so long as Nanny can now advise as to what constitutes the "countryside", lest Nanny's greedy councils start fining dog walkers for not bagging it!

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Losing Our Minds - Heseltine Nails It!

Those who look for offence in the words and deeds of others have had a wee field day courtesy of Lord Heseltine, and his comment about Theresa May having a "man-sized" job.

He quite rightly calls these people out for what they are (mad), as per the Telegraph:

"I think, if I may say so, I think we are losing our minds if we really think that in the most serious issue facing this country, a slip of an 83-year-old about using a phrase which everybody would have been using a few years ago is simply of anybody's interest."

If only these people had something useful to do with their lives, instead of looking for offence!

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Prats of The Week - Cardiff Metropolitan University

Kudos to Cardiff Metropolitan University for winning Prats of The Week for their Orwellian diktat banning phrases such as “right-hand man” and “gentleman’s agreement” in favour of more inclusive, gender neutral language. 

Cardiff Metropolitan University’s revised code of practice states more appropriate terms should be used where possible, adding that students should not allow their “cultural background” to affect their choice of words on campus.

“Forefathers”, “mankind” and “sportsmanship” are also on the list of 34 words and phrases to be avoided as part of efforts to “embrace cultural diversity” by the university.

The Independent lists the banned phrases:

Cardiff Metropolitan University's Guide to Inclusive Language:

Term – Suggested alternative
"Best man for the job" – Best person for the job
"Businessman/woman" –  Businessperson, manager, executive
"Chairman/woman" – Chair, chairperson, convenor, head
"Charwoman, cleaning lady" – Cleaner
"Craftsman/woman" – Craftsperson, craft worker
"Delivery man" – Delivery clerk, courier
"Dear Sirs" – Dear Sir/Madam (or Madam/Sir)
"Fireman" – Fire-fighter
"Forefathers" – Ancestors, forebears
"Foreman/woman" – Supervisor, head juror
"Gentleman’s agreement" – Unwritten agreement, agreement based on trust
"Girls" (for adults) – Women
"Headmaster/mistress" – Head teacher
"Housewife" – Shopper, consumer, homemaker (depends on context)
"Layman" – Lay person
"Man" or "mankind" – Humanity, humankind, human race, people
"Man" (verb) eg man the desk – Operate, staff, work at
"Man in the street", "common man" – Average/ordinary/typical citizen/person – but is there such a person?
"Man-hour" – Work-hour, labour time
"Man-made" – Artificial, manufactured, synthetic
"Manpower" – Human resources, labour force, staff, personnel, workers, workforce
"Miss/Mrs" – Ms unless a specific preference has been stated – though its common not to use titles at all these days
"Policeman/woman" – Police Officer
"Right-hand man" – Chief assistant
"Salesman/girl/woman" – Sales assistant/agent/clerk/representative/staff/worker
"Spokesman/woman" – Spokesperson, representative
"Sportsmanship" – Fairmess, good humour, sense of fair play
"Steward/ess" – Airline staff, flight attendant, cabin crew
"Tax man" – Tax officer/inspector
"Waitress" – Waiter, server
"Woman doctor" (or feminine forms of nouns eg actress, poetess) – Doctor (actor, poet etc)
"Working man", "working mother/wife" – Wage-earner/taxpayer/worker
"Workman" – Worker/operative/trades person
"Workmanlike" – Efficient/proficient/skillful/thorough

Good to see the "university" focusing on what is really important!

Cardiff Metropolitan University, well deserving Prats of The Week!

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The Brexit Blog

Just to give you all a heads up, I have added another site to my collection - "The Brexit Blog" covering news and comment on the Brexit process, as Britain leaves the EU.

I suspect it will run and run!

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Queen Breaches Health and Safety Rules

The Queen is pictured still riding at 90 - and without a helmet.
That's hardcore! https://t.co/vFhDOPn0FT

— Mark Sparrow (@Markgsparrow) March 6, 2017

An elderly woman riding a horse, without wearing a helmet!

What would nanny say?

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Nanny's Rural Road - The Dartford Crossing

Funny how this "misclassification" caused it to be excluded from pollution assessments!

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Nanny's Nice Little Earner - Bus Lane CCTV

As loyal readers know, Nanny is strapped for cash. As such she is always looking for ways to tap her minions for more money.

One such mechanism is that of bus lane cameras being used to fine motorists.

The Telegraph reports that Nanny's bus lane cameras in England took 31m from motorists in 2015-16, fining almost 4,000 motorists per day.

The most lucrative camera in the country makes £6,000 every day.

The worst 10 cameras for catching drivers are centred in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, Manchester and London.
England's most lucrative bus lane is on the northbound section of John Dobson Street. It is based in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, a council that made over £1m from bus lane fines in 2015/16.

A nice little earner!

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Stop This Kind of Thing!

This is happening far too often! pic.twitter.com/CEgIN0wiSe

— John Donoghue (@JohnDonoghue64) February 28, 2017

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