Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.
Showing posts with label bus. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bus. Show all posts

Thursday, March 02, 2017

Nanny's Nice Little Earner - Bus Lane CCTV


As loyal readers know, Nanny is strapped for cash. As such she is always looking for ways to tap her minions for more money.

One such mechanism is that of bus lane cameras being used to fine motorists.

The Telegraph reports that Nanny's bus lane cameras in England took 31m from motorists in 2015-16, fining almost 4,000 motorists per day.

The most lucrative camera in the country makes £6,000 every day.

The worst 10 cameras for catching drivers are centred in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, Manchester and London.
England's most lucrative bus lane is on the northbound section of John Dobson Street. It is based in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, a council that made over £1m from bus lane fines in 2015/16.

A nice little earner!

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Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Scary Bus

As Halloween draws ever closer I see that the good people of Tulleys Farm (who are planning a Shocktober Fest) have fallen foul of a handful of people who have been "scared" by the adverts for the Fest that Tulleys Farm have used on around 100 buses that operate from South London into Sussex.

The Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) are checking to see if if any rules have been broken. The Huffington Post quotes Stuart Beare, organiser of the event:
"The image of the zombie girl on our advertising is no worse than many images you'll see at this time of year in newspapers and magazines, on the Halloween costumes in the supermarket aisles and even on kids' TV programmes."
The furore will of course provide some very nice free PR for the event!

ASA did not investigate complaints last year over a similar advert, it has yet to rule on this year's advert.


Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

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Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, April 12, 2013

Only The Lonely



My thanks to a loyal reader who pointed me to a fine example of Nanny becoming over zealous wrt road signage, and then deciding (thanks in part the the actions of a prankster) that her original signage was bollocks.

Nanny's chums from Norwich City Council originally added the word "only" to sign indicating that the road is for only buses between 7:30AM and 9:30AM.

Step forward a prankster who added an extra sign beneath it, saying "the lonely".

Needless to say this prompted Nanny to get the wheels in motion to remove the prankster's sign, but Nanny will also be removing her sign as well.

For why?

Seemingly it wasn't needed after all!

Norwich Evening News quotes a remarkably convoluted civil service speak explanation from the council:
When potential enforcement action needs to be taken by local authorities they have to be sure of their ground as it’s becoming increasingly common for people to challenge it.

Our initial interpretation of regulations on this matter was that the sign needed the word ‘only’ to be legal. However, having carefully reconsidered the regulations, we’re now confident that the word ‘only’ does not need to be added to take enforcement action and so we shall remove the ‘only’ along with the addition which has been made.”
Isn't it funny how Nanny can change her opinions about her own rules and regulations?

No wonder there is such a void of understanding between normal people and the councils htat rule them!

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Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

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Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Friday, September 28, 2012

Nanny Bans Paint - On Health and Safety Grounds



I was gemused to read in my local rag that Nanny has banned people from carrying tins of paint on buses, as they appear to be a hazard.

Ken Adams (a civil servant in his 50's) recently attempted to board the 5B with a tin of white emulsion.

The driver told him he couldn’t come on, so he had to walk home two miles.

Following a complaint in writing, he received a refreshing email response from Brighton and Hove Bus and Coach Company:
"I am very sorry and you have my heartfelt apologies. They are not fun things to carry long distances and I hope you made it home safely. 

It is policy because tins of paint are usually heavy and if the bus braked suddenly then they can open quite easily and do damage to the bus. They also have a habit of popping open in direct sunlight.

I know this is another ridiculous sign-of-the-times health and safety policy and not all our drivers adhere to this
.” 
At least they admit that the health and safety policy is ridiculous!

Sounds like a whitewash to me! (HAHAHAHAHA).

Anyhoo, there is further irony.

Brighton and Hove Council is more than happy to accept paint at its two recycling centres.

So how can one get to these centres?

Oh that's easy, the council recommends that you go by bus!

Aha!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

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Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

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Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Monday, September 17, 2012

Prats of The Week - Bristol City Council

Hoozah, 'tis another Monday morning; and therefore time to award one of my prestigious, and internationally, renowned "Prats of The Week" Awards!

This week it goes to Bristol City Council, who have combined prattery with a wee bit of ker farking ching.

Anyhoo, for why am I awarding the council this award?

Just ask Abus, a Bristol bus company, whose drivers have been issued with parking tickets for....can you guess children?

Yes, that's right, waiting in city centre bus stops!

Ker farking ching!

Abus owner, Alan Peters, told the BBC that the council agreed his buses could wait at quiet stops before picking up passengers.

However, Nanny's chums from Bristol City Council said that tickets were issued when buses were pulled up for more than five minutes due to "considerable demand" from operators.

Mr Peters said over the past two years, his drivers have been issued with an average of one parking ticket per month, the majority of which he has successfully appealed against.
"Ninety per cent of the tickets have been rescinded but I still have to write the appeal and sometimes go to a parking tribunal. It's all time-consuming."
Bristol City Council gave a jobsworth meaningless response:
"We are aware of the situation with Abus and have advised them of the current situation with regards to enforcement action. 

We are looking, as stated, to finding a working solution."
Bristol City Council, well deserving Prats of The Week!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Monday, November 24, 2008

Nanny is Off Her Trolley

Nanny is Off Her Trolley
Nanny reached new heights of stupidity recently, when one of her underlings banned an elderly lady from boarding a bus because her shopping trolley was considered to be a health and safety hazard.

Glenys Hughes, 76 and recovering from replacement knee surgery, tried to board a Stagecoach bus to take her up a steep hill to her home in Lydney in the Forest of Dean. However, the bus driver informed her that the trolley was a health and safety hazard and would not let her board; thus forcing her to walk for 45 minutes.

Stagecoach have apologised for the driver's knobheaded behaviour.

Another example of how badly the elderly are treated by Nanny and her minions.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Celebrate the joy of living with champagne. Click and drink!

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Thursday, June 26, 2008

The Dangers of Buses

The Dangers of BusesDid you know that in Nanny Britain, criminals are not just people who commit a criminal act or who even are planning to commit a criminal act, but are also people who look like they might be about to commit a criminal act?

What constitutes looking as though you are about to commit a criminal act?

Leaving a large ticking box in a public place that says "Bomb" on it?

No!

Wearing stocking over your head as you enter a bank?

No!

Photographing buses!

Yes, you did read that correctly!

Rob McCaffrey has found to his cost that his innocent hobby of bus spotting, and photographing buses, is now banned in Nanny's Britain.

Mr McCaffrey (an omniboligist) has been taking pictures of buses all over the world for forty years, but only ever faces problems in Britain. He has a collection of 30,000 photos of buses, trams and coaches.

However, such is the level of paranoia in Britain today (caused by Nanny and egged on by a compliant and ignorant media) that Mr McCaffrey is giving up his hobby because he keeps being mistaken for a terrorist and paedophile

Over the last year he has been questioned twice by the police, and had to give all his personal details after people who saw him innocently snapping buses on public roads reported him.

In Pontypridd, South Wales, last September a bus driver got rather worked up about being photographed and called the police. the police then demanded to see what Mr McCaffrey had on his camera.

In Monmouth a Police Community Support Officer ran Mr McCaffrey's name and address through police computers.

I would remind you all that it is not illegal to take photos in a public place. However, under Section 44 of the Terrorism Act 2000, police officers may randomly stop someone without reasonable suspicion, if the area is a likely target for an attack.

Mr McCaffrey said:

"I can deal with the fact someone might think I'm a terrorist, but when they start saying you're a paedophile it really hurts."

The state and a compliant ignorant media are responsible for the level of paranoia in this country. We are building our own prison and hell on earth with our own hands, brick by brick, petty restriction by petty restriction.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Celebrate the joy of living with champagne. Click and drink!

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Monday, June 16, 2008

Nanny Bans T Shirts - Freedom of Speech Is Dead

Nanny Bans T Shirts - Freedom of Speech Is Dead
Nanny would have us believe that we live in a free country, where freedom of speech is guaranteed.

True enough, so long as you don't say anything that offends Nanny or her minions; as pensioners Mike Lacey, John Wilding and his wife Tessa found out the other day.

They were attempting to join a demonstration at Heathrow airport against the proposed new runway when they were questioned and escorted from Heathrow, after police decided the Stop Airport Expansion slogan on their T-shirts was "inflammatory".

What was this "inflammatory" phrase?

"Stop Airport Expansion"

Mike Lacey, John Wilding and his wife Tessa were stopped as they tried to join a demonstration against plans for a third runway.

Five Met police officers took their names, addresses and descriptions and followed them out of a bus terminal, warning they would be arrested if they returned within 24 hours.

In a "stop and search form" officers wrote that Mr Lacey was questioned because he had been "seen in the bus terminal wearing inflammatory clothes".

A sorry state of affairs indeed when a simple T shirt upsets the state, freedom of speech is dead!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Celebrate the joy of living with champagne. Click and drink!

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Booze Matters

Booze Matters
I see our kebab munching (only if surrounded by body guards), cannabis smoking (promoted to class B on Jacqui's personal recommendation...I guess she thought that she was still at school) ex teacher Home Secretary, Jacqui (she likes to use the short name) "42 days is not long enough" Smith, is keen to jump on the Boris Bandwagon.

Hot on the heels of Boris's announcement that he is to ban drinking booze on tubes and buses, she has decided to look into banning booze on trains.

One small fly in her oinkment, train journeys tend to be much longer than tube or bus journeys (ever suffered the 6-10 hour journey from London to Edinburgh?). Indeed, trains often have a drinks trolley flogging the stuff to their thoroughly fed up customers.

Whilst banning it on the tube and buses makes sense, as the journeys are much shorter and there are no facilities for serving it, drinking it or indeed pissing it away etc; banning it on trains is absurd.

How else am I meant to endure the journey from Croydonia to London, without my regular fix of a double G&T served in a non threatening plastic cup?

The majority of well behaved train drinkers should not be punished for the actions of the moronic, slack jawed, dribbling minority who misbehave on buses and tubes; usually because they are three sheets to the wind before they get on the tube, bus or train.

Smith should get off Boris's Bandwagon!

Maybe she needs to smoke something to calm down!



Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Celebrate the joy of living with champagne. Click and drink!

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Thursday, February 14, 2008

The Wrong Arm of The Law

The Wrong Arm of The LawI have to say that even my cynical, cold calculating mind was somewhat gobsmacked when I read this story.

It shows just how paranoid the Nanny state has become, and the dangers that we now all face from our own government.

Darren Nixon, a 28 year old mechanic from Stoke on Trent, was listening to his MP3 player whilst waiting for a bus.

Nanny has so managed to instill a sense of fear and panic in some of our fellow citizens that a somewhat hysterical female passer-by saw what she thought was a gun, it was of course the MP3 player.

She called the police, who duly tracked Mr Nixon using CCTV. When he got off the bus home from work he was surrounded by a firearms unit, who bundled him into a van.

He was then put in a cell and his fingerprints, DNA and mugshots were taken before he was released.

I would venture to suggest that no more than 30 seconds after arresting him should police have worked out that the "gun" was in fact an MP3 player.

Therefore why did they insist on taking his photo and DNA details?

It should be noted that Mr Nixon's DNA, picture and prints will be forever held on Nanny's nasty little database; leaving him with a "criminal" record.

Nanny's police will also keep on record that he was arrested on suspicion of a firearms offence.

How is that right?

Mr Nixon said:

"It was unreal – I had a completely clean record before this and have always been a law-abiding citizen.

As I got closer, I could see that two of the cops had guns. My heart was racing a mile a minute. One of them was hiding behind a car door, looking down his sight at me, and the other was shouting orders and pointing a gun at me.

I turned the music off and they were telling me to put my hands up in the air
."

A spokesman for Nanny said:

"An operation was put in place and a man matching the description was detained."

No hint of an apology, or explanation as to why Nanny will keep his DNA etc on her database.

Yes, the police were right to check out the 999 call. However, as already noted, within 30 seconds of arresting Mr Nixon they could verify he was not in possession of a weapon.

Why did they proceed with taking his prints, photo and DNA?

Something is very seriously wrong in Britain now.

The state should be afraid of the people, not the people afraid of the state!

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

The Postman Always Rings Twice

The Postman Always Rings Twice
Whilst the postman may well ring twice, Nanny's special little team of "advisers" will keep ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing until you jolly well open the door and speak to them.

Next year Nanny will launch upon the entire nation an army of "travel advisers", paid for out of our own pockets of course.

This private army will be doorstepping all of us in an attempt to "educate" and "persuade" us about the benefits of switching from driving to walking, cycling and public transport.

Nanny's AdvisersNow, if like me, you tend to avoid opening the door to people such as "religious types", government officials, sales people and other assorted riff raff you may well be thinking that it will be a simple matter to avoid interacting with Nanny's little army.

Not so!

If you are out, they will keep coming back and will call up to ten times, even in the evenings or at weekends.

I call that harassment, were a cold calling company (such as Contact4) to do it they would be getting my boot firmly implanted in their posterior (see what I did to Contact4 here).

It seems that Nanny changes the rules to suit herself.

Anyhoo, Nanny's little army will ask you about your travel habits and will offer advice tailored to your journeys, including maps for walking and bus timetables.

If you appear unconvinced, they will offer incentives such as discounts at local bike shops and outdoor stores and free pedometers to measure how far you are walking.

A study by the Department for Transport found that the biggest challenge faced by the advisers was overcoming initial suspicion on the doorstep. It said:

"Door-to-door contact is often associated

with double-glazing sales and therefore

is not always particularly well received.

A non-accusatory but assertive manner is required
."

Hmmmm...I look forward to my encounter with an "assertive" representative of Nanny on my doorstep.

Maybe I should film it?

Aside from the intrusion and busybody nature of this project, there is one very large fly in Nanny's oinkment.

The public transport system in the UK is shite..most especially in London...how the fark are you meant to squeeze more people on the trains, tube and buses at peak times without adding more carriages and services?

As ever, this little idea of Nanny's is badly thought through.

Our money well wasted!

Monday, August 27, 2007

Patronising Bastards!

Health and Safety Gestapo
Our old "friends" in the Health and Safety Gestapo are up to their old tricks again.

This time they have put their interfering size 10's into the positioning of a bench for a bus stop.

Helen Greenough and Vera Clews had been badgering Stoke-on-Trent City Council for two years to install a bench, so that they could rest their legs as they waited at their nearest bus stop.

Two years on, and it finally arrived.

One small problem, the dimwits in the council (local councils, what are they good for?) installed it back to front; so that it faces a hedge, rather than the road.

The elderly passengers who use the bust stop are getting stiff necks from having to look over their shoulders all the time, to see if the bus is coming. When they do spot the bus, they often can't get round the bench quickly enough in order to catch it.

Now why did Stoke-on-Trent City Council put the bench back to front?

Health and Farking Safety!

Quote:

"The bench was put in this position

because it would be dangerous to have it facing the road.

Some elderly people are unsteady on their feet

and would risk falling into the road or getting

splashed if it was facing the road
."

For fark's sake!

How many elderly people are falling over in front of buses in this country?

Mrs Greenough and Mrs Clews said the position of the bench on the Leek Road was "ridiculous". Mrs Greenough, 84, said it had become a "laughing stock".

Quote:

"We are nearly all pensioners on this road

and the bus only comes every 85 minutes

so you can be waiting a long time.

I've been on at the council for almost

two years trying to get this bench put in,

but if they can't do it right then they might

as well take it away.

There is nothing wrong with me,

I'm perfectly capable of getting on a bus without

falling into the road.

We are not all doddery old dears
".

Nanny and her minions really are a bunch of patronising bastards!

By the way, it cost £50 to fix the bench in place. However, in order for it to be turned around it will cost £1000.

What a great country we live in!

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Educashun

EducashunNanny announced her much vaunted shake up in educashun yesterday; aside from a rather "eclectic" mix of new subjects such as, global warming and Urdu, the new curriculum also includes a few other "ideas".

Structured timetables are to be abandoned, and pupils will be given the chance to mark their friends' work as well as their own.

Oh yes, that's a corker of an idea!

Pupils will also have to complete 12 key 'life skills', this includes making a 50 mile unaccompanied journey by bus or train.

Erm...isn't learning how to use the train or bus something that parents are meant to teach their children?

Well, I think the most appropriate phrase that can describe this new curriculum is:

"Bollocks"

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Nanny's Segregated Swimming Pool

Nanny's Segregated Swimming PoolI wonder sometimes if Nanny really understands what she stands for. On the one hand she pushes her pet subjects of "diversity awareness", "tolerance" and "quotas". However, then she comes along and does something like this which flies in the face of tolerance and equality.

Rather "surprisingly" (look closely folks, you will find I am being a tad "ironic" with my use of that word), my own local borough of Croydon (see www.croydoniscrap.com for all about Croydon) have put their two left feet firmly in the sh*t on this one.

It seems that Croydon Council have decided that the local Muslim community are not being treated fairly, when it comes to swimming facilities. As such Nanny's chums on the council have decreed that Thornton Heath (a part of Croydon) swimming pool should hold Muslim only sessions on a Sunday afternoon.

As if that were not bad enough, the sessions are for men only.

A triple whammy!

Racist, religioust and sexist, to boot!

Nice going Nanny.

The men only swimming sessions are held for two hours every week in Thornton Heath swimming pool, in fact they have been doing so for a year now.

I should point out that non Muslim men may swim during this time. However, they must follow a dress code akin to bathing in the Victorian age; swimming shorts must hide the navel and extend below the knee.

Daniel Foley, a regular at Thornton Heath, said:

"I turned up and saw a sign saying it was closing early for Muslim afternoon

I couldn't believe it
."

Croydon Mosque says:

"Muslims are not allowed to show intimate parts of their body.

This is non-negotiable.

Muslims have as much right to go swimming as anyone else
."

A spokesman for Croydon Council said:

"We are keen to ensure sporting facilities in the borough

are accessible to the whole community.

We appreciate that certain religious groups,

such as Muslims, have strict rules on segregation

for activities including sports,

so in response to requests from the local community,

we have been running these sessions at Thornton Heath Leisure Centre

for the past year,

with a women-only session on Saturday evening and a male-only session on Sunday evening.

These have been successful and well attended.

Croydon is not unique in offering such sessions

to minority communities, many local authorities do the same.

We are not giving preference to any one group

but simply taking practical steps to create access to all
."

A few facts here:
  • Local authorities collect council taxes from all residents, in order to provide services and facilities for all residents without fear or favour to any one group. The segregation is clearly discriminatory, as it denies many people access to the facility on a Sunday afternoon.


  • Many people in South Africa and America fought and died for the right to sit in the front of the bus, to attend the same schools and to swim in the same pools as everyone else. Croydon's policy is segregation, pure and simple; it is a retrograde step which will alienate the Muslim and non Muslim communities.


  • It has taken centuries for Britain to develop the freedom and civil liberties, that we should be rightly proud of. We will not throw those centuries of toil and sacrifice away simply to placate those who are intolerant and bigoted.
Those who will not accept mixing with their fellow British citizens in a communal facility (funded by the community), and who seek to commandeer that facility, should consider their future in this country.

Period!

Division and segregation lead to suspicion and intolerance.

Intolerance and bigotry are not welcome.

This is non-negotiable.

Feel free to write to Croydon Council here Croydon Council

Here is a list of councillors, and their email addresses Councillors

Give them my love:)

I would write to them myself, but they have steadfastly ignored very single communication that I have ever sent to them. So much for local democracy!

Whilst you are about it, why not drop Bliary Poppins a note too? He has been banging on about Muslims needing to integrate more, this segregation is surely a contradiction of his stated policy is it not?

Write to the PM here Bliary Poppins.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Prat of The Week

Prat of The WeekThis week's prestigious Prat of The Week Award goes to none other than Nanny herself, and the Labour government as a whole.

For why, other than their lamentable record in office?

Specifically for this little tale of stupidity and indifference to the views of professionals. I refer to the 101 non emergency hotline, that Nanny foisted on six police regions as part of Labour's manifesto commitment to lessen to load on the 999 line.

Hampshire police have stated publicly that the 101 line has turned out to be a fiasco. The police forces who are piloting the scheme are being swamped with absurd questions about train times, and local tourist attractions.

It is estimated that around 66% of calls made to the 101 line are bollocks, and not related to its intended use.

Hampshire Police are demanding that the roll-out across the country be stopped, until Nanny and her ministers validate its usefulness.

The theory was that 101 would be used to report; intimidation, harassment, vandalism, graffiti, criminal damage, fly-tipping and other environmental problems.

However, Hampshire police receive calls such as:

"Can you tell me the times of trains to Brighton?

I'd like someone to test my smoke alarm.

Do you know when the next bus leaves for Southampton
?"

Oddly enough, in the "old days" when police were more respected and less inclined to arrest you for knocking conkers down from trees, banal questions to the police were often encouraged as a means of establishing a rapport between the citizen and his local "Bobby". The old saying "if you want to know the time, ask a policeman" readily springs to mind.

Anyhoo, those days appear to have long gone, and the police no longer have the time or inclination to interact with the person in the street.

Deputy Chief Constable of Hampshire, Ian Readhead, thinks the 101 line is bollocks and said:

"We made representations to government.

We recommended it was too early to go live with wave two

and that the government should spend more time learning about this
."

Superintendent Nigel Hindle, in charge of call handling at Hampshire police, said:

"The strap line for 101 is 'when it's less urgent than 999.

That was on a leaflet that went through every door in the county.

Across the month we receive about 50 calls that we consider emergency fire and health issues on the 101 service.

The operators are not trained to deal with health and fire issues
."

Hampshire said that it alone needed 18 more telephonists, costing £450K, to cope with the calls.

Leicester and Rutland, Cardiff, Sheffield and Northumberland and Tyne and Wear are also taking part in the initial pilot.

A further 20 forces will join them in the 'second wave', expected early next year.

Nanny's chums in the Home Office have denied that the scheme will be ditched. Instead they are using the weasel phrase:

"We plan to carry out a thorough evaluation of the pilot areas."

Meaning that when all the fuss has died down, the scheme will be quietly dropped (just like so many other harebrained failed schemes that Nanny has introduced with a fanfare).

Nanny well deserves the Prat of The Week Award.

However, as said, the police would find their role in the community less traumatic and more productive if they sought to engage on a personal level with the man in the street. Trying to be helpful with regard to enquires about smoke alarms and bus timetables would in fact be a quite a good thing, not via a 101 line though.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Nanny Bans Birthdays

Nanny Bans BirthdaysOnce in a while Nanny does try to do the right thing, and make a positive difference to our lives.

Eh?

What's that you say Ken?

Straight up folks, I kid you not.

One such attempt has been her work in trying to reduce the amount of age discrimination in the workplace. As an aside, a few years go before I hit 40, I was talking to a so called "recruitment professional" (worse than estate agents in my view) about consultancy. His advice was that once you are over 35 (yes 35) you are too old!

However, I digress, as with all of Nanny's attempts to improve things they tend to go wrong; because they hit the wrong target, or because the legislation is so sloppily drafted that the practice becomes over officious and over prescriptive.

Nanny's anti age discrimination laws are a case in point. Aside from the fact that age discrimination is currently hard wired into all aspects of society (eg adverts for "fun/useful" products only target the under 30's), Nannys new rules have been drafted in such a way as to ensure that people are now applying them in an absurdly prescriptive manner.

Alan & Thomas insurance brokers in Bournemouth have taken Nanny's new rules to heart by banning the circulation of birthday cards for staff to sign, amid concern that light hearted "ageist" comments could unwittingly breach Nanny's new age discrimination laws.

Seemingly remarks such as "It's better to be over the hill than under it" or references to bus passes could cause offence, the company said following legal advice.

The new laws allow staff to take action against their company, if they feel they have been harassed or victimised due to their age.

Alan & Thomas will now send a card to each staff member on their birthday, signed by the directors.

Personal cards from individual members of staff are still allowed, as are cakes.

Julian Boughton, the firm's managing director, said:

"The new rules outlawing age discrimination are a potential

minefield for both employers and employees.

Every business should be taking action.

Often employees don't realise the implications of what they are writing
."

Neil Gouldson, an employment law specialist at Rowe Cohen, said:

"Gags in birthday cards about people being 'over the hill' will need to be curbed."

For fark's sake!

Meanwhile, if you are elderly and end up in one of Nanny's less well run "homes" for the elderly and infirm; you may well be starved, maltreated or abused. Why doesn't Nanny legislate against that?

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Off The Buses

Off The BusesSeemingly some of Nanny's chums are a bit fussy about who rides on school buses. In fact they are so fussy that they check out your religion first.

No kidding!

Nanny's chums at Townsend Church of England School, in St Albans, are insisting that their pupils who wish to use the school bus must have been baptised. Syndi Jai, 11, a pupil at the school found this to her cost the other week when she was refused access to the bus because she was the wrong religion.

Ain't religion marvellous!

She was told that she could not catch the school bus from her home town to Townsend Church of England School in St Albans.

Her mum, Frances Wood, said:

"Syndi has been in a right state.

She is so anxious about having to go to school on the public bus
."

It seems that other children are having similar problems.

Jamie Ankers, also 11, has also been refused a bus place (even though he is a pupil at the school) because he is a Methodist.

His mum Jean Smith, said she was originally asked if she would pay £230 a term for the school bus place.

"Then they sent me a letter at the end of August saying he didn't get a place."

Seemingly Townsend School is not the only one to use religion to segregate its bus places in St Albans, Nicholas Breakspear Roman Catholic School in St Albans is also doing the same (except they are banning non catholic pupils from their bus).

Nanny's chums on Herts County Council are backing the schools.

However, Cllr Cowan said:

"I cannot see it's the county council's job to divide children.

The school makes its own selection.

In a slightly different context

it's like separate treatment for blacks and whites
."

Another example of religion dividing people.

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Nanny Bans More Smoking

Nanny Bans More SmokingNanny's obsession with smoking never ceases. She is gathering her forces for another assault on this most "evil" of vices.

This time she is planning to extend the ban on smoking in public places, to encompass those who are bystanders.

This means that Nanny will ban smoking in bus shelters, football grounds, the entrances to office buildings, train platforms and concert venues.

Nanny's Health Minister, Lord Warner, said it would protect more people from secondhand smoking.

What about protecting people from knives, guns and violent assault?

Lord Warner said recently:

"There will be places that will not be enclosed

where there is a risk of harm from secondhand smoke

due to the inevitable close grouping of people.

Examples might be sports stadiums,

bus shelters

and entrances to public buildings or workplaces
."

There is of course no scientific evidence to prove that people can be harmed by passive smoking outside. However, lack of evidence has never stopped Nanny in the past.

Lord Stoddart said:

"I don't know of any study that says a whiff of somebody else's smoke out in the open air is dangerous."

Nanny's Health Secretary, Patricia Hewitt, claims it will save thousands of lives. However, scientific evidence shows that 95% of smoking-related deaths are caused by lighting up at home, not in the workplace.

As with all of Nanny's spurious half baked policies based on dodgy science, it's all bollocks!

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Off The Buses

Off The BusesWhen I first heard about this particular Nanny daftness I assumed that I was in fact in some form of parallel universe, or altered state of consciousness.

Yes, maybe I have been watching too much Dr Who!

Anyhoo, I soon realised that I was still on planet earth and in Croydon.

Nanny's chums in the Gloucestershire police take the health and safety of their officers very seriously, quite rightly so.

However, I would suggest that they may be taking their concerns over health and safety a little too far in the case of one of their community support officers Ian Yeomans.

Mr Yeomans was supposed to cover the Gloucestershire village of South Cerney from a police station three miles away, but the job did not come with a car.

The parish council quite reasonably suggested that Mr Yeomans could use the hourly bus services.

Fair enough?

Not in Nanny's world!

Gloucestershire police said he would not be allowed to use the buses, until the health and safety implications had been examined!

Er what precisely do they think will happen to him on a bus, that doesn't happen to the rest of us that use them?

Maybe they had read of the dangers of cans of paint brought on by pensioners?

Inspector Steve Williams said a health and safety check was needed for "all police activity".

Cretins!

Mike Stuart, council chairman, said:

"This over-cautious attitude has really gone beyond the realms of reality."

Have no fear, Nanny has found a solution that will cost her nothing (but will of course cost the taxpayer more money), Gloucestershire police will pay for Mr Yeomans to have access to a car.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

On The Buses

On The BusesSometimes even I am surprised, and stunned, by how daft Nanny is becoming in her senile old age.

We have seen her ban; Hot Cross buns, fags, fat, religion, hoodies, hats, conkers, hot water you name it...now it seems that paint is on her list of banned products.

Nanny's trolls who run the bus service in Cardiff have taken it upon themselves to designate paint as a dangerous substance, which should not be carried on the buses.

Brian Heale, who is 73, got on a number 9 bus the other day and wanted to be taken from Heath Hospital to Prospect Place in Cardiff. Unfortunately for Mr Heale he was carrying a tin of paint, antique emulsion to be precise; he was taking it home to do a spot of painting.

The jobsworth bus driver, who clearly has been trained at Nanny's special school for jobsworth cretins, decided to strictly adhere to the rules issued by the bus company; these rules have placed paint in the same category as swords, guns and cans of petrol.

The driver caught Mr Heale in the act of carrying a can of emulsion, and ordered him off the bus.

Mr Heale is quoted as saying:

"When he told me I couldn't take the paint on the bus I thought he was joking.

But he parked the bus and called head office.

He told me carrying the paint was against new health and safety regulations and told me to get off.

It's crazy and hysterical.

Next thing, you won't be able to take a wet umbrella on in case it drips water on the floor.

Health and safety rules are one thing but this is just daft;

it was a No 9 bus not a dangerous building site
."

Mr Heale was thrown off into the rain, and took shelter in a cafe. There the manager took pity on him, and his paint, and gave him a lift home.

Nanny's new health and safety rules governing public transport list paint as a "hazardous article". It can be taken on the bus only if it is "carried in two containers, ie, a sealed pot and a bag, and is not left unattended on a parcel shelf where it could slide and tip, burst open and spread across the floor".

Cardiff Bus when confronted with their stupidity, admitted that they may have been a little hard on Mr Heale.

A spokesman squirmed:

"We apologise to Mr Heale for the obvious inconvenience caused.

The safety of our passengers is our No 1 priority, which is why the company takes regulations on health and safety very seriously
."

The company admitted, however, that there were times when it needed to display a little more flexibility when enforcing the rules. In other words they admitted that they didn't think, and were happy to let Nanny do their thinking for them.

For shame!

Nanny is destroying society, people no longer think about what they are doing and are now happy to mindlessly obey her daft over prescriptive rules.

It is time that we started to think for ourselves again.

Send your thoughts on this matter to Cardiff Bus via this link Knobheads.