Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Nanny Bans Breaking Wind

WindbreakMy commiserations to the Hacker family who tried to have a picnic, away from the irritations and intrusions of life, on the Clifton Downs.

Unfortunately, they made one fatal error.

They forgot that Nanny is omnipresent.

The Hackers, more or less alone on the part of the Downs they had selected for their picnic, put up a windbreak to shelter them from the blustery conditions which would have blown their paper plates away (which of course would be construed as litter).

In the distance they observed a vehicle approaching.

Can you guess who was in that vehicle children?

Yes, that's right, council enforcement officers (can someone tell me exactly what specific law an "enforcement officer" is meant to enforce, or is it any rule he likes to make up?).

Council enforcement officers stopped their car and got out, they then ordered the Hackers to take down the windbreak.

For why?

It is deemed by Nanny to be a 'semi-permanent structure'.

Semi permanent structures are banned by the by-laws of the area, according to the enforcement officers a windbreak is a semi permanent structure.

However, the rather odd thing is that the leaflet given to the Hackers explaining the rules did not mention windbreaks (only gazebos and tents).

Could it be that the enforcement officers were making the rules up as they went along.

By the way, as soon as the windbreak had been taken down the paper plates were blown away.

When questioned by the media over this nonsense, Bristol City Council admitted that their employees had gone over the top.

Bit late now isn't it?

As usual Nanny has got away with it, and would have continued to make the rules up as she went along had the media not humiliated her.

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  1. Disgusted, Tunbridge Wells10:54 AM

    Strikes me that being a retard is an essential qualification to be a "council enfarcement occifer". I wonder where councils find them?

  2. Ah yes, Bristol City Council, the same council that permits a traveling funfair, a couple of circuses, a flower show, a bonfire night celebration and several other events to erect tents, marquees, fairground rides and stages on the same piece of grass. All of which do far more damage than a windbreak ever could.

    It's also the same council that permits overflow parking from the Zoo on the Downs if it means a few extra pennies in the council coffers.

    Furthermore, the same council also seems to condone far more nefarious activities carried out by a certain type of gentlemen who seem to enjoy going into the bushes together close to the Circular Road and Ladies Mile. How do they condone it? The Rainbow group, a rights group within the council worked with charities to hand out condoms and advice to aforementioned gentlemen before they disappeared into the shrubbery to bugger each other senseless.

    You cannot erect a windbreak but you can have erections of a different kind on the Downs according to Bristol City Council.

  3. Ken said;
    "Could it be that the enforcement officers were making the rules up as they went along."

    Of course they bloody were!!....The type of person that takes on such a role, is usually power hungry and often stupid.
    These socially retarded people tend to be unable to form meaningful relationships with other people and tend to achieve little in their sad, empty lives....The hi-viz jacket gives them two things that they seek;-
    1) A perception of power over others.
    2) The notion of belonging to a gang.

    I am starting a campaign from today, that will mean I shall no longer call those employed by public bodies "Officers." They are public employees, council workers or council staff. The term officer, gives the impression of some kind of authority.....Language is important and we see the culural Marxists using it to great effect to silence the majority through PC and labelling people as ists or isms.

    Once again, this story illustrates the consequenses of giving too much power to those that are neither sophisticated nor intelligent enough to use that power....

    Say no to hi-viz!!

  4. 'Yes, you are quite right. It is not a windbreak. It is a semi-permanent structure. My family and I are 'travellers' and we have decided to take up residence here. But by asking me to take it down you are discriminating against us, which is something that I shall have to take up with your Councils' Traveller Liaison Manager. Now let me write down your name for when I report you to him'

  5. I think these silly twats take on the role of "Council Enforcement Officers" in the hope that someone might someday refer to them as "CEOs."

    Wouldn't that be grand.

  6. Archroy1:21 PM

    Tonk, do you remember Lady Porter, of Westminster City Council 5p. cemeteries fame?

    When she was in charge of the counsil she made them stop referring to 'officers' and called them 'staff' instead. She also banned the use of the word 'leave', as she said this was a military term. and everyone had to refer to 'holidays'.

    As you say, language is important. Pity she buggered up over the cemetaries and the asbestos in the flats.

  7. Tonk.2:07 PM


    Yes I do remember her well.

    I do feel that councils have used special terms to describe their staff's roles to bolster their staff's self esteem at a time when council jobs paid small salaries/wages.....Of course, this is no longer the case.

    I suspect Billy no mates and Julie no brain feel much better about themselves by being called a planning officer, as opposed to a council planning clerk, just as socially awkward Steven and psychopathic Phil feel better being called an enforcement officer, rather than a four letter slang term for part of the female anatomy that many of us know they really are;-)

    Say NO to Hi-Viz!!

  8. Lord of Atlantis2:19 PM

    Disgusted, Tunbridge Wells: In answer to your question, perhaps I should point out that some years ago it was decided to close all the lunatic asylums. Now we know where the residents went: they became council enforcement officers!

  9. "I wonder where councils find them?"

    The dole queue, usually.

  10. Uncle John4:43 PM

    When the paper plates 'blew away', surely the Jobzwuths reported them for environment crime?

  11. I agree with all the comments above.

    These people are total bastards, but it really does not make the slightest difference that they call themselves officers. Even if they called themselves Tsars or Gods the amount of authority that they have over people remains very small.

    Can you imagine yourself being bossed around in such a way? Sitting there watching your families picnic being disrupted, being scared to put your windbreak back up, just in case they return?

    If the general public have lost their will to stand up for themselves and have lost the ability to construct a sensible argument against obvious dimwits, then the general public must accept some responsibility.

    Of course these officers are stupid, of that there can be no doubt; but if you cannot outwit stupid people, then things do not look very good for you.

    Offering ‘tea and sympathy’ to people that allow themselves to be bullied only gives temporary relief and is not constructive in the long term.

  12. microdave7:43 PM

    How can you have a "semi" permanent structure?

    It's either temporary or permanent - It can't be both...

    And by the way Mr "Hacker" just happens to work in IT, how ironic!

  13. Uncle John2:13 AM

    I can just imagine the Jobzwuths approaching families on the Downs, and asking questions about "semi-permanent erections"

  14. Uncle John2:14 AM

    I can just imagine the Jobzwuths approaching families on the Downs, and asking questions about "semi-permanent erections"

  15. These high viz clowns are required travel in pairs - one to read and one to write.

  16. Julius Caesar2:22 PM

    John Holyer: I was unaware they could either read or write?

  17. To Julius Caesar
    I hear that Bristol City Council now plan to send these high - viz clowns out in threes: one to read, one to write and one to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

  18. To redress the balance I have to say that I spoke to two of our local high-vizs and they were polite, courteous and helpful.