Tuesday, July 31, 2012
The Minority Are Always Right
In Nanny's world the voice of the minority has become the loudest and the one that must be obeyed, even if that voice is spouting bollocks.
Step forward the minority voice (ie the single complaint) that caused Blackheath Primary School in Sandwell to recently ban parents from taking photographs of their own children during a school play.
With just minutes before the performance was due to start, the Mail reports that headteacher Lesley King announced nobody was allowed to film their children because one parent had complained.
In Nanny's world, the minority is always right and we now live under the tyranny of the minority!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Monday, July 30, 2012
Nanny Loves Cress!
I am gobsmacked, in fact rarely has my gob been so smacked, to read that Nanny has decreed that schoolchildren should not be allowed to visit an allotment.
For why?
Health and bleedin' safety!
Nanny's chums from Wem (a town in Shropshire) have decreed that children from Stables Day Care Nursery are banned from the allotments in Love Lane.
The kids have not been causing damage or trouble. In fact the Nursery leaders rent a plot there, and wanted to teach the children about where their food comes from.
In this day and age of prepacked shite, this is a most laudable and excellent idea!
Sadly Nanny doesn't think so, Nanny is of the view that the children were breaking health and safety rules. Not only that, but Nanny claims she has received complaints from other allotment users.
For why?
Seemingly a fence erected to keep the children safe has caused annoyance.
Piffle and posh!
Children help their parents in their gardens all the time, would Nanny ban this?
I used to help my mum in her allotment when I was a nipper, I never impaled myself or anyone else with spades etc.
How is it now, after centuries of kids toiling fields and gardens, that allotments and their kin are deemed to be dangerous for kids?
Nanny is in fact quite nasty about this particular issue, the Shropshire Star quotes Councillor Thelma Broom:
“They just don’t see that it is for their own safety.I don't know about how loyal readers view the above, but to my tired old eyes it sounds aggressive and nasty.
We need to be very strong about what is right and wrong, not what they want.
If they don’t like it, it is up to them to give the tenancy up.”
For good measure, Nanny believes that it would be better to show children how to grow cress in a jar.
I kid you not!
Step forward councillor Mandy Meakin:
“I know it is a very good policy to teach children horticulture – grow cress in a jar.”Councils are the enemies of the people!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Friday, July 27, 2012
The Dangers of Bells
I think Nanny should ban bells or, at the very least, Jeremy Hunt on health and safety grounds!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
HMRC Publishes Photo of Plumber
Yet certain criminals (because their lives may be in danger because of what they did) are given the gift of anonymity by the state.
Why did Nanny's HMRC do this to a plumber?
Killing a chicken scares the monkeys, Nanny is broke and will use every trick and instrument at her disposal to make sure we pay our tithes to her.
Why do you think Gauke was banging on about "cash in hand" the other day?
Plumbers, electricians etc al are easy targets.
In other news, Barclays have today said sorry for rigging Libor and have announced that underlying first-half pre-tax profits rose 13% to £4.23BN.
Yay!!!
So all is right with the world, yes?
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Thursday, July 26, 2012
HMRC's Spy School
Be warned, HMRC are now training schoolchildren to report to the state people whom the children suspect of not paying their "fair share" of tax.
How can a child or adult know what someone else's "fair share" of tax is meant to be?
This will have terrible consequences for democracy and the structure of sociaety, if it is not stopped now.
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
The Birds
My thanks to a loyal reader who alerted me to a story in the Courier the other day, about Nanny's chums from Angus council banning bird feeders in the garden of a council house occupied by Anne Chrystall and her husband Jim for the last 30 years.
Mrs Chrystall's garden, which often wins prizes for its flora and fauna, has had bird feeders in it for some years. However, because the council received one complaint about seagulls they decreed that Mrs Chrystall should remove her feeders ASAP.
The council official who arrived at Mrs Chrystall's house was apparently abrupt, rude and didn't even introduce herself.
Oddly enough, the feeders only contains seeds and nuts for small birds; ie they are of no interest to seagulls.
Needless to say Nanny isn't interested in the facts, when they contradict her view of reality!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Ker Farking Ching!
Loyal readers are very well aware that councils use parking fees and fines as an easy means to fill their ever empty coffers.
I am delighted to see that even Nanny's Road Safety Minister (Mike Penning) has now realised that. The Telegraph recently reported that councils in England and Wales saw their surplus from parking rise to £511.6M in 2010-11 from £489.4M in 2009-10 (as per an analysis of local authority accounts by the RAC Foundation).
This prompted Penning to warn them to stop treating motorists as an easy target to raise funds.
Whilst councils are prohibited from using fines to bolster their income, many get round the law by earmarking the cash raised for other transport projects.
Tory Westminster council made a £38 million profit from parking, whilst Brighton (oh I do love to be beside the seaside!) racked up a £12.7M.
Ker Farking Ching!
Oh, on the subject of tax, David Gauke wins the Hypocritical Gobshite of The Year Award.
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Monday, July 23, 2012
Knobhead of The Millennium - David Halpern
For why has he been given such an award?
For his cretinous (and highly dangerous) suggestion that HMRC should overclaim tax from taxpayers.
At the Civil Service Live event Halpern said "it would be better for us to modestly overclaim tax" because when HMRC underclaims people become irritated and tempted to cheat.
He then went on to talk ever more bollocks about the "the psychological boost of getting a rebate" - and the possibility that people spend rebates:
"When people get tax back from HMRC, they feel great.Our taxes are paying the salaries of cretins like Halpern!
In the US, people love it, and they spend the money differently too. So we're trying to persuade you guys [HMRC] that's what you should do. Make sure you have a certain amount of outcome which means you have to give people their money back."
David Halpern well deserving Knobhead of the Millennium!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Taxed To Death
I reproduce in full, an article by Matilda Murday published on Liberal Conspiracy below, which relates the tragic story of how council hounded a man to his death.
As I have noted many times before, councils are the enemies of the people!
Article below:
On the 8th of February a man took his own life. Peter Williams was a gifted engineer, whose invention, still manufactured today, landed him in the Guinness World Records, but he was driven to bankruptcy and suicide by an unthinking and inhumane bureaucratic system.
Falling ill after his diabetes medication failed he fell into arrears on his council tax.
Months later, having paid of these arrears in full the council charged him £1350 in court costs. Unable to pay but not refusing to, he made an offer in 2005 to pay in instalments, this was refused.
From 2008 onwards Peter’s friends and loved ones wrote letters and campaigned to try and get the Council to recognise Peter’s situation and vulnerability, but they still pursued him. They threatened to evict him from his home of 30 years, a £200,000 house he owned outright. At one stage there was even a warrant out for Peter’s arrest.
Peter Williams, was diagnosed with serious depression, his GP wrote to the Council explaining that he was in the most severe category and was in danger. The Council still pursued him.
Alistair Burt, Peter’s MP stepped in to delay the date of Peter’s inevitable eviction in 2010 and succeeded in getting a stay of execution. In 2012 the firm who still manufacture his invention, SAVortex, made an offer of £1k per month to clear the now £70k + costs & interest, but it was rejected.
In February, after years of being pursued by Central Bedfordshire District Council, Peter wrote: “I have had enough and cannot stand any more of the mental turmoil,” and stepped in front of a train.
After 7 years of relentless pressure, including visitations and an arrest warrant, Peter Williams had accrued over £70,000 in interest and court fees on an original charge of £1350 for arrears that had been long paid off. He could no longer cope.
The Council’s said at the time: “we reject any suggestion that the council was responsible for this tragic event.”
In May the Local Government Ombudsman found Torbay Council guilty for carrying out the same tactics against a suicidal man who, unlike Peter, thankfully survived the ordeal. They have had to make reparations to the tune of £25,000.
In Peter William’s case the LGO have found there to be no maladministration, despite the similar circumstances, tactics and the loss of life.
I wrote about Peter for the first time today, because the press had not covered the issue. Taking to Twitter Central Bedfordshire Council’s response was simply:
But we can discuss it and we should. Peter’s last request to his
friend Richard Harris was ‘to try make sure it never happened to anyone
else’ and we cannot simply let the Council “reject any suggestion” of
responsibility.
Please take the time to write, email, phone or even tweet Central Bedfordshire District Council and tell them that this is an unacceptable way to treat people.
Telephone: 0300 300 8301
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
As I have noted many times before, councils are the enemies of the people!
Article below:
On the 8th of February a man took his own life. Peter Williams was a gifted engineer, whose invention, still manufactured today, landed him in the Guinness World Records, but he was driven to bankruptcy and suicide by an unthinking and inhumane bureaucratic system.
Falling ill after his diabetes medication failed he fell into arrears on his council tax.
Months later, having paid of these arrears in full the council charged him £1350 in court costs. Unable to pay but not refusing to, he made an offer in 2005 to pay in instalments, this was refused.
From 2008 onwards Peter’s friends and loved ones wrote letters and campaigned to try and get the Council to recognise Peter’s situation and vulnerability, but they still pursued him. They threatened to evict him from his home of 30 years, a £200,000 house he owned outright. At one stage there was even a warrant out for Peter’s arrest.
Peter Williams, was diagnosed with serious depression, his GP wrote to the Council explaining that he was in the most severe category and was in danger. The Council still pursued him.
Alistair Burt, Peter’s MP stepped in to delay the date of Peter’s inevitable eviction in 2010 and succeeded in getting a stay of execution. In 2012 the firm who still manufacture his invention, SAVortex, made an offer of £1k per month to clear the now £70k + costs & interest, but it was rejected.
In February, after years of being pursued by Central Bedfordshire District Council, Peter wrote: “I have had enough and cannot stand any more of the mental turmoil,” and stepped in front of a train.
After 7 years of relentless pressure, including visitations and an arrest warrant, Peter Williams had accrued over £70,000 in interest and court fees on an original charge of £1350 for arrears that had been long paid off. He could no longer cope.
The Council’s said at the time: “we reject any suggestion that the council was responsible for this tragic event.”
In May the Local Government Ombudsman found Torbay Council guilty for carrying out the same tactics against a suicidal man who, unlike Peter, thankfully survived the ordeal. They have had to make reparations to the tune of £25,000.
In Peter William’s case the LGO have found there to be no maladministration, despite the similar circumstances, tactics and the loss of life.
I wrote about Peter for the first time today, because the press had not covered the issue. Taking to Twitter Central Bedfordshire Council’s response was simply:
Mr Williams' death was tragic and the circumstances of his death will be investigated by the coroner KA
At this stage we are not able to discuss the circumstances of Mr Williams death. We will co-operate fully with the Coroner KA
Please take the time to write, email, phone or even tweet Central Bedfordshire District Council and tell them that this is an unacceptable way to treat people.
Telephone: 0300 300 8301
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Friday, July 20, 2012
Lessons In The F Word
I was gemused to read the other day that Shafton Advanced Learning Centre in Barnsley (why can't they just call it a school?) recently gave its 11 year old pupils a worksheet in which they were asked to grade swear words (eg the F word).
Entitled 'Acceptable or Not?' it listed situations including:
-telling your friend to f--- off,
-shouting f--- off
across a classroom, in a shopping centre or in assembly and
-saying
c---.
A Telegraph censored version of the worksheet can be seen here.
In a statement, the school said:
"As part of our social responsibility we are educating our students to understand what kind of language is appropriate, at what times and in what contexts."There is a certain logic to that, I suppose. However, it would probably help the kids more if they were first taught to read, write and speak in a coherent rational manner; ie schools should focus on the core skills needed by children (the three arses) if they are to have a hope in hell of functioning as adults in the real world.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Booze Matters - Nanny To Ban Sponsorship
I am hugely gemused to see that the House of Commons health committee (which sits in the place where MP's drink taxpayer subsidised booze) has got its knickers in a twist over the marketing of booze.
The committee is of the view that the booze industry is not doing enough to tackle "problem" drinking.
The solution?
Tougher rules on alcohol marketing are needed, including possibly a ban on sports sponsorship.
However, the ban on sponsorship won't occur yet.
For why?
Cough....
Step forward Heineken, a respected and welcome SPONSOR of London 2012.
Still, the committee has in part got its way.
For why?
Whilst Heineken is allowed to sponsor the Games, British brewers are not!
Heineken has a £10M sponsorship agreement million for ‘sole pouring rights’ at all Olympic venues!
British branded beers are persona non grata.
COUGH!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
The Inactivity Pandemic
I am gemused to read that the Lancet is warning us that there is an "Inactivity Pandemic".
What the fark?
Seemingly, if the "research" is to be believed, lack of exercise is now causing as many deaths as smoking across the world.
A report, published in the Lancet (needless to say to coincide with the Olympics which has corporate sponsors such as McDonald's and Coke), estimates that about a third of adults are not doing enough physical activity; causing 5.3m deaths a year.
Researchers want the problem treated as a pandemic, and they recommend that Nanny warns us about the dangers of inactivity rather than just reminds us of the benefits of being active.
I have a far better solution, Nanny should proactively encourage us all to take up smoking:
1 The exercise from going to buy a packet of fags, from coughing vigorously each morning and from lifting a fag to our mouths will surely increase our metabolism.
2 The increase in deaths brought about by smoking will skew the statistics favourably towards smoking, rather than inactivity, as being the prime killer.
Problem solved!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
The Olympics - Jeremy Clarkson Speaks
Anyone care to hazard a guess as to how long it will take for some "no life idiot" to complain about Clarkson's comments, and for Clarkson to be subjected to some daft police investigation and forced into an insincere apology?
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
2011 Census Figures Disputed
Unsurprisingly (given that it is prepared by the remarkably unreliable ONS) the accuracy of the 2011 census data (released yesterday) is already being disputed.
The Telegraph reports:
"Local authorities who simply do not recognise the figures for their areas. The 2011 census reveals that the official numbers have previously understated the scale of net migration by 14 per cent – and that does not take into account illegal immigrants, who would not complete the census form.Hey hoh!
Westminster city council in London said it had “serious concerns” about figures that suggested its population had dropped by 9 per cent since the last estimate a year ago, while the council’s own data report a rise in numbers paying council tax."
Can we believe anything that Nanny tells us anymore?
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Five A Day Is Still Bollocks!
Loyal readers will recall that way back in December 2010 I wrote that Nanny's five a day advice was bollocks.
By happenstance Channel Four aired a Dispatches episode last night which highlighted how the food industry had highjacked the concept of five a day, in order to get us eating shit.:
"Dispatches investigates what's happened to the five-a-day campaign, which was designed to get us all eating more fruit and veg. Reporter Jane Moore reveals how this vital health message has been hijacked as a marketing tactic, and how the food industry uses the campaign to promote sugary, fatty, salty products like ready meals, soups and drinks.Sadly the programme ignored the fundamental issue, namely that there is no scientific rationale for eating five a day in the first place.
She also looks at confusion over what actually counts as a five-a-day portion and investigates whether the government is effectively regulating what the food industry tells us about the scheme."
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
PCSO's Fake Fines - Ker Farking Ching!
Her solution is simple, but seemingly effective, she imposes fake fines on us.
Am I kidding?
No, I am not!
The Evening Standard reports that George McNaught, a police community support officer (plastic policeman) who received an award for bravery three years ago, has been jailed for six months for issuing hundred of false fixed penalty notices.
The Westminster-based PCSO was so desperate for success that he started inventing bogus notices, usually for cycling on the pavement.
McNaught used items of lost property to obtain personal details of members of the public before issuing the penalty notices.
Charming!
Some people rolled over and paid the fines, which start at £45 and quickly increase to £320, while others spent hours arguing about them in court. Bailiffs were even sent to the home of one woman who had been handed a false notice.
It is not known exactly how many false fines he issued. However, those investigating the crime have discovered at least 350 suspect tickets between February 2010 and September 2011.
The report does not say if he wore a hi vis jacket when he issued the fines!
I wonder how many other Nanny enforcement officers are issuing fake fines?
Ker Farking Ching!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Monday, July 16, 2012
2011 Census Results
If anyone is interested, Nanny's Orifice of National Statistics (the body that regularly screws up financial data) is releasing the results of the 2011 Census:
- On census night the population in England and Wales was 56.1 million, 53.0 million in England and 3.1 million in Wales. This was the largest the population had ever been.
- The population of England and Wales grew by 3.7 million in the 10 years since the last census, rising from 52.4 million in 2001, an increase of 7.1 per cent. This was the largest growth in the population in England and Wales in any 10-year period since census taking began, in 1801.
- The median age of the population in England and Wales was 39. For men, the median age was 38 and for women it was 40. In 1911, the median age was 25.
- The percentage of the population aged 65 and over was the highest seen in any census at 16.4 per cent, that is one in six people in the population was 65 and over.
- There were 430,000 residents aged 90 and over in 2011 compared with 340,000 in 2001 and 13,000 in 1911.
- In 2011, there were 3.5 million children under five in England and Wales, 406,000 more than in 2001.
Ker Farking Ching!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Saturday, July 14, 2012
G4S Clusterfuck
By the way folks, it appears that G4S staff covering the Olympics don't speak fluent English!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Friday, July 13, 2012
Smoking Fascists - Physician Heal Thyself!
My thanks to a loyal reader who alerted me to a recent article on Dick Puddlecote about the smoking fascism practised by the BMA towards their own kith and kin.
It seems that Dr Brendan O'reilly was suspended from the BMA Welsh Council for having the "temerity" to suggest that the "evidence" about the "dangers" of smoking in vehicles was not as sound as it could be.
Ironically, the BMA also seemed to agree with his view the "evidence" was not 100% sound, as the BMA publicly revised some of the data. However, Dr Reilly was still suspended.
Sadly, some scientists and their ilk can be as prone to prejudice, bias and prima donnaism as the rest of us.
Here is the article in full:
"Possession of an independent mind is not really something the health lobby consider a quality, sadly.Physician heal thyself!
A retired GP has been suspended from the BMA Welsh Council until 2014 after he questioned the evidence behind the BMA's campaign to ban smoking in vehicles on BBC Radio.And what was he criticising?
Dr Brendan O'Reilly, a retired GP, has also had his BMA membership suspended until he provides ‘an acceptable written apology' to four named BMA members, including Dr Vivienne Nathanson, head of the BMA science and ethics committee.
In a hearing held yesterday a BMA Council panel said they considered Dr O'Reilly's language when describing his opposition to the BMA's use of statistics on the risks of passive smoking in cars as ‘unacceptable'.
Among figures questioned by Dr O'Reilly was a statistic that children in cars are exposed to 23 times more toxins than people in a smoky bar.That's right. Pointing out that the BMA were publishing absolute rubbish, which they themselves later admitted, is a crime liable to suspension in the BMA's book.
In its determination, the BMA admitted it did, at a later stage, have to publicly revise some of the data in its briefing paper Smoking in Vehicles. But it said Dr O'Reilly's use of the term manipulation was ‘detrimental to the honour and interest of the BMA'.
‘BMA members should be able to debate differences in opinion without being threatened or harangued for doing so,' he added. ‘There is a massive issue here about free speech.'Free speech in the field of anti-smoking hysteria? I'm afraid it's not allowed, sunshine. Nor is truth, more's the pity.
Just ask James Enstrom or Michael Siegel."
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Thursday, July 12, 2012
G4S Knobheads of The Millennium
Congratulations to G4S for winning my rarely awarded, yet highly prized, Knobheads of The Millennium Award.
For why?
Have a wee look here on my Olympics site and in Metro, and note especially what I say in the final paragraphs:
"Were the Olympics being run in transparent and open manner the taxpayers (who are paying for this corporate marketing fest) would have the right to look at the contract that G4S has signed for providing security for the Games. Unfortunately the Olympics are not being run in an open and transparent manner, and the contract is not available for public scrutiny.G4S well deserving Knobheads of The Millennium!
Why are the taxpayers, who are funding the Games, not allowed to satisfy themselves that their money has been wisely spent and that contracts signed in their names have been negotiated in their best interests?
As an FCA and experienced fraud investigator I would never advise people to put money into a project/business without them at the very least seeing the contract and reviewing it thoroughly, taking advice from independent finance/legal professionals.
The government would argue that they acted in the interest of taxpayers when reviewing and negotiating the contract with G4S. However, as can be seen from this omnishambles of incompetence, it is clear that the government was not up to the job of looking after taxpayers' interests. "
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Kerfarkingching - Nanny Taxes Five-aside
As loyal readers know, Nanny has something of a bee in her bonnet about us being fit and healthy (she needs a fit and healthy workforce so that she can levy taxes to pay for her expenses and mechanisms of state monitoring and control). Therefore she is often exhorting adults and kids to play sport.
However, as loyal readers also know, Nanny is a hypocrite who is desperately short of cash.
Therefore it should come as no surprise to learn that Nanny's chums in HMRC are trying to tax five aside football teams.
The Independent reports that HMRC is trying to levy VAT at 20% from companies operating all-weather pitches at more than 150 sites in Britain.
The levy will add about £1 to the typical £4.50 cost of playing in a five-, six- or seven-a-side match – or £100 a year for adults who play twice a week.
Critics of the scheme (including Nanny's own Sports Minister, Hugh Robertson) argue that the levy, which will collect £5M a year, will hit people participating in sport and undermine efforts to improve the nation's health.
For more than 20 years, five-a-side centres have not attracted VAT because their operators believed they were only supplying the land to sports teams. However, the HMRC has ruled that their use should be subject to tax because the players that use them are hiring pitches from commercial concerns that are also organising mini-leagues. It said that such businesses should always have been subject to tax.
More than 500,000 children are estimated to use such facilities free every week, with the number expected to double within a decade.
Ker Farking Ching!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Nanny's Child Snatchers
A fine example of such hypocrisy can be seen in a recent decision by Nanny's chums in Durham County Council to remove a yet to be born baby (when it is born) from its mother Toni McLeod, because they believe Mrs McLeod would pose a "risk of significant harm" to the child.
What kind of risk does Nanny think the child will be exposed to?
It seems that Mrs Mcleod has violent links to the English Defence League (EDL), and that Nanny does not wish the child to become "radicalised". Nanny has also told her husband Martyn that he would be unable to care for his child, because he is a full-time soldier just back from Afghanistan (are soldiers not capable of bringing up children then?).
Please now compare and contrast this to Nanny's approach to the children of extremist Islamic cleric Abu Qatada, who was allowed to remain with his children when he was briefly remanded on bail earlier this year as the Government tries to deport him.
Lib Dem MP John Hemming is unimpressed and is quoted by The Express:
“It raises a curious question as to why Abu Qatada is allowed to radicalise his children but the state won’t take the chance of allowing Toni McLeod to look after her baby in case she says something social workers won’t like.
I am very strongly opposed to the EDL, which I believe to be a racist organisation, but I do not think we should remove all of the children of the people who go on their demonstrations, however misguided they may be.Nanny is a hypocrite, and should be kept well away from children!
This case is one where the ‘thought police’ have decided to remove her baby at birth because of what she might say to the baby. I wonder what the baby’s father is thinking when he fights for a country which won’t allow him to have a child because of what the child’s mother might say.
Toni now accepts she was wrong to have gone on EDL demonstrations but freedom of speech means nothing if people are not allowed to say things that are thought to be wrong.”
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Monday, July 09, 2012
The Secrets of The Taxman - #Taxman
Those of you who "enjoy" paying tax should make an effort to watch this programme tonight:
The Secrets of The Taxman
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
The Secrets of The Taxman
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
The Silence
It being a Monday, with all the depressive baggage that this day of the week brings, I am in the mood to share with you a gemusing story that a loyal reader pointed me to a wee while ago.
Iain Gilmour, head teacher at Isambard Brunel Junior School in Portsmouth, had recently become rather fed up with kids talking so loudly at breaktimes in the dining hall. He therefore asked that they whisper and, rather unwisely, cited "health and safety" as his justification; claiming the loudness of their chatter in the hall broke some unknown noise health and safety rule.
Personally speaking I think he was absolutely right to ask for some "'ush in 'all", children should be seen not heard!
Anyhoo, it seems to have worked, the whispering rule has now been relaxed and the atmosphere in the dining hall is apparently far more conducive to civilised verbal intercourse than before.
My compliments to Mr Gilmour for a good idea and for giving me a laugh!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Friday, July 06, 2012
Educashun - The Three Arses
I am gemused that Nanny is proudly claiming that she will now test 11 year olds on grammar and punctuation etc, as part of a "back to basics" campaign (didn't the Tories rather run afoul of another "back to basics" initiative in the 90's?).
Anyhoo, The Telegraph reports:
"Under the new exams, which will form part of Sats tests, pupils will be expected to recognise the difference between formal and non-standard English, in response to concerns that too many youngsters rely on so-called “text speak” in their written work.That all sounds very jolly, but I have wee question.
The exam will also focus on the grammatical functions of words, including nouns, verbs, adjectives, adverbs, pronouns, prepositions and conjunctions.
Officials say that children should be “taught to proofread” their work for spelling and punctuation errors, omissions and repetition.
Pupils will also be expected to use “fluent, joined and legible” handwriting and will be taught to use punctuation marks correctly, with a focus on full stops, question marks, commas, inverted commas and apostrophes.
Teaching unions have already threatened to boycott the exam - which will be introduced in all state schools next year – over concerns that it risks narrowing the curriculum and promoting a culture of “teaching to the test”."
I appreciate that I am a gazillion years old and that my educashunal experiences took place in pre history, in a public school where one was flogged on Hogimass Day for not wearing the school onion etc etc, but what the fark has Nanny been teaching kids then if it isn't basic reading, writing and 'rithmetic?
Oh, and why the hell are the unions moaning about teaching kids to read and rite proper??
For fark's sake what the hell has been going on in schools over the last 40 years?
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Thursday, July 05, 2012
Prats of The Week - Jeff Ellis and Associates
This week, in keeping with the fact it is internationally renowned, I am awarding it to Jeff Ellis and Associates of Florida.
Whom are they?
They provide lifeguard services.
For why am I awarding them this?
Just ask Tomas Lopez, one of their (now ex) lifeguards.
Mr Lopez was patrolling part of Hallandale Beach north of Miami, when he was told that a swimmer was in trouble in an unguarded area of the beach.
He is quoted by the BBC:
"I wasn't going to say no."He went to the man's rescue.
Can you guess what happened next children?
Yes, that's right, he was fired!
For why?
His company claims that he had broken company rules and could have put other swimmers at risk. Susan Ellis of lifeguard provider Jeff Ellis and Associates told the South Florida Sun-Sentinel:
"We have liability issues and can't go out of the protected area."She added that the stretch of Hallandale Beach that Mr Lopez was supposed to be patrolling on Monday was being protected by other lifeguards who were on the phone to emergency operators at the time.
Be that as it may, Mr Lopez and an off-duty nurse then helped the man until paramedics arrived to take him to hospital.
Two colleagues have quit in protest!
Jeff Ellis and Associates, well deserving Prats of The Week!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Wednesday, July 04, 2012
Nanny's Race To The Bottom
As loyal readers are only too aware, Nanny has the misguided view that children must never experience failure. In her warped view, the experience of failure will cause the children untold "damage" and "heartache".
Nanny is of course talking out of her posterior on this issue (as she does on so many other issues).
Failure, and learning to cope with failure, is an essential part of a child's development; it is necessary in order for the child to develop into a mature well rounded adult, with sense of self responsibility, capable of handling life's knocks.
Aside from trying to eliminate the concept of competition and winners/losers in school sports, Nanny has also tried to dumb down the exam system in order to pretend to herself and the hapless examinees that she has created a generation of academic intellectuals.
The reality, as is only too evident, is that she has created a nation of intellectual pygmies; unable to perform even the most basic of tasks in the adult world, and who need to be placed on remedial courses in order to be able to function in real jobs.
I am pleased to say that the Education Select Committee has also come to the same conclusion. It notes that the current system of exams and exam boards has created “perverse incentives” in which multiple examiners strip content out of syllabuses, stage training seminars for teachers and sell textbooks packed with exam tips to help schools inflate their overall scores.
The Telegraph reported that Graham Stuart, the committee’s chairman, said that politicians and exam boards had been in “denial” over a drop in standards in recent years, despite a notable decline in public confidence.
Mr Stuart said:
“The public have lost confidence in exam standards and this needs to be put right. We’ve got to stop the dumbing down of the courses young people sit and stop exam boards competing on how ‘accessible’ their syllabuses are.”Nanny's system has, perversely, created competition between schools and exam boards; sadly it is a competition in a "race to the bottom" (as per a quote in the report).
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Tuesday, July 03, 2012
Times Have Changed?
Back in the 50's and the 60's it was commonplace for those who rented out rooms to openly discriminate against those whom they did not wish to rent their rooms to, eg "No Irish" would be added to some room for rent adverts.
Move forward many decades and such blatant discrimination is both illegal and would be, quite rightly, frowned upon.
So everything is now hunky dory then?
Not quite, for you see there seems to have been a reversal whereby the anti discrimination rules are being flouted by certain landlords.
The BBC reports the following:
"Today overt racial discrimination is both illegal and socially unacceptable.I wonder whether Nanny will intervene to put a stop to this?
But it is now possible to find advertisements seeking tenants for rented accommodation which specify race, or other characteristics, in a way which some experts believe breaks the law.
Newsagents in different areas of London carry adverts saying:
- "Double bedroom available… Asian only"
- "Double room to let Gujarati (Indian) only"
- Close to the station and bus stops (Filipino only)
- "Professional single lady or Sri Lanka professional couple"
- "House for rent… only Asian families""
Even if Nanny attempted to prosecute these people for discrimination, she would fail in the long run.
People can simply get around the law by placing an advert on a site catering for their own group, eg students, Indians or feminists. They can put a notice up in a foreign language, thus excluding anyone who eg can't read Hebrew, Bengali or Polish.
Failing that, they can also simply wait for the responses and filter applicants.
Nanny has yet to learn that you cannot legislate against private hypocrisy and innate/silent prejudice, she can only legislate against blatant and open/vocal prejudice/hatred. The innate/silent prejudice will only be overcome when people learn to live together and recognise/respect each others' shortcomings and strengths.
Sadly we may have to evolve into higher beings, free of religious, racial and sexual tribalism, before that becomes commonplace!
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Monday, July 02, 2012
Nanny's 'Armless Ban
I am ungemused to see that Nanny recently took it upon herself to try to ban some Scots from celebrating the anniversary of the Battle of Bannockburn (1314), when Robert the Bruce defeated Edward II.
Stirling council were not happy that the annual rally in Bannockburn includes people wearing medieval costumes and carrying swords, axes, daggers, shields and other assorted weaponry.
Thus Nanny decreed that participants were allowed to bring weapons, but must keep them in their cars and only bring them out when they arrive at the historic site.
So there you go folks, so long as you keep your weapons in your car Nanny doesn't mind;)
Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.
Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.
Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.
www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"
Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts
Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)