Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.
Showing posts with label phones. Show all posts
Showing posts with label phones. Show all posts

Thursday, May 04, 2017

Police Phone Disabling Powers




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Friday, June 07, 2013

Nanny USA "Not" Spying on US Citizens


Further to yesterday's article about the NSA collecting phone and internet records of US citizens, James Clapper director of US national intelligence has somewhat muddied the waters by stating that the policy only targets "non-US persons".

Errmm...sorry for being thick...but how does Nanny USA know the nationality of someone on the end of a phone or on a pc?

Anyone care to have a guess as to how Nanny can achieve this seemingly impossible feat?

The good news is that if Mr Clapper is telling the truth, then Nanny USA is only spying on foreigners.

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Tuesday, October 07, 2008

1984 - The Reality

1984 - The Reality
Oh dear, it seems that Nanny has been reading Orwell's "1984".

All well and good, except that instead of taking it as a warning she is using it as a blueprint.

Nanny is thinking about spending £12BN on a database to monitor and store the internet browsing habits, e-mail and telephone records of everyone in Britain.

GCHQ, Nanny's eavesdropping centre, has already been given £1BN to start the ball rolling.

The Home Orifice, run by the ex Home Economics teacher (Jacqui Smith), is keen to stress that "no formal decision had been taken" (they say that when they want to gauge how angry people will be). However, our "respected" government ministers have already agreed "in principle" to the programme.

Nanny says that the live monitoring is necessary to fight terrorism and crime. Quite how Nanny can build a live system that can monitor eg an annual number of text messages of 57 billion is beyond me.

A few factoids:

1 It is immoral and repellent that our phone calls, emails and texts will be bugged by Nanny.

2 The state has proven itself incapable of implementing all large scale IT projects (eg NHS), Nanny will screw this up as well.

3 Data security is not Nanny's strong point, eg HMRC Datagate, the data gathered by this monstrosity will leak. Guaranteed!

4 1984 was a warning, not a blueprint!

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Nanny's Humongous Database

Nanny's Humongous Database
I see that Nanny's much "respected" and "efficient" Home Orifice is considering plans to build a humongous database to store the details of every phone call made, every email sent and every web page visited by British citizens in the previous year.

Oh yes, this will work!

Nanny says that this will help her in her fight against terrorism and crime. Well, she always says that.

From what I recall the invasion of Iraq was meant to make the world a safer place from terrorism too, but that plan was a complete load of old bollocks as well.

The Home Orifice has already approached telecoms firms and internet service providers (ISPs), they would be the ones providing Nanny with their customer records if the plans go ahead.

The security services and police would then be able to access records for any individual over the previous 12 months, by gaining permission through the courts.

Do you recall how RIPA, the surveillance law allegedly designed to be used only for terrorists, is being abused by local councils in their never ending fight against dog shit and litter?

I guarantee that this database, if it comes into being, will be abused in exactly the same way.

Another rather nagging worry in the back of my mind is the security aspects of the data storage, given last year's loss by HMRC of 25 million personal records and ongoing reports of other security breaches in Nanny's databases, who seriously believes that Nanny is capable of looking after all of the data securely?

In the UK, last year, 57 billion text messages and 3 billion emails a day were sent. Given Nanny's shambolic mismanagement of other IT projects, do you really think that she is capable of designing and managing a system that can cope with all of that data?

Of course you don't!

We all know that Nanny and her minions are basically useless and inept. This project is a car crash waiting to happen.

Notwithstanding that, Nanny's Home Orifice continue to press ahead. A Home Orifice spokesman said that the plan was needed to reflect changes in communication that would "increasingly undermine our current capabilities to obtain communications data and use it to protect the public".

The trouble is that the data is not used to protect the public at all, see what Nanny has done with RIPA.

Governments down the centuries have hated it when people gather together to talk to each other "privately", they have always done their best to listen in or to ban such discussion. This is the same old trick being rebranded to suit the modern age.

Terrorism is used as Nanny's catch all excuse to cover all of her rapidly expanding surveillance requirements. In truth, our lives are not being blighted on a daily basis by terrorism but by "low level" crime (yobbery, thuggery, robbery, scummy behaviour etc). These are the issues that need to be addressed.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

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Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

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Celebrate the joy of living with champagne. Click and drink!

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Big Brother

Big Brother
Nanny drags Britain ever further down the road of total surveillance.

Nanny's Home Orifice has announced that information about all landline and mobile phone calls, made in the UK, must now be logged and stored for a year under new laws. The data collected about calls made and received will be available to a staggering 652 public bodies, including the police and councils.

However, please do not be alarmed, Nanny has promised that the content of calls and texts would not be read.

So that's alright then!

Minister for Security and Counter-terrorism Tony McNulty attempted to turn the new rules into a nice way of helping old ladies fix their gas cookers.

Quote:

"Say some old lady has got difficulties

with someone who's repaired the gas in

her house and has a mobile phone

for somebody who's clearly dodgy.

The local authorities can just get the

subscriber information next to that number.

The second level of data is not simply

the subscriber, but also the calls made by that phone.

And the third level which is purely

for the security forces, police, etc,

is not just the subscriber information

and the calls made, but also the calls

coming in and location data -

where the calls are made from
."

McNulty claims that local councils would only have access to data on "a legitimate and proportional basis".

Who the hell trusts local councils with any task, let alone one that gives them snooping rights?

The Home Orifice also promised that local councils will not use the data as a means to collect taxes....errrrmm, anyone believe that?

Friday, August 24, 2007

Gang Culture

Gang Culture
As Nanny and her lackeys in the media work themselves up into a frenzy over the "gang culture", that we are told is sweeping Britain; it is time for a little pause for thought as to why we have groups of teenage lads huddling together on the streets in gangs, and what might be done.
  • It's not a new phenomena, look to Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet was basically a love story set amongst gang violence. Less hysteria from the media and politicians is needed.


  • Teenage males need strong male role models. When they have no strong male at home (be it biological father or father figure), they will seek role models elsewhere. This of course flies against the face of Nanny's love affair with single parents.


  • Parents who allow their teenage children to roam the streets at night, need to be "reminded" that this is a sure fire way for teenagers to find themselves in trouble.

    Where the parents continue to allow their kids to roam at will at night (and those kids are found to be getting into trouble with the law), appropriate action against the parents needs to be taken. That which is most of value to the parents should be seized, ie pc's, TV's, CD collection, mobile phones etc.

    After that, target their benefits.


  • Those that would seek to mentor and act as strong male role models for these youths (eg scout masters, youth centre workers etc) are put off by Nanny's myriad rules and regulations re interaction with children.

    Nanny and the media now assume that all males who wish to interact with under 18's are potential paedophiles, the rules set up by Nanny to weed out the small minority of people who are paedophiles are putting off the majority of those who aren't. The rules need to be changed.


  • Nanny's middle class abhorrence of boxing has led to the closure of boxing rings, both in gyms and above pubs. These were ideal places for teenage males to be trained to handle their aggression and to take some pride in themselves, under the guidance of a male mentor. Bring back the boxing gym.


  • Nanny's dislike of competitive team sports has led to a decline in group after school sports clubs; eg football etc. These team games are an ideal way for teenage males to bond and to learn to handle their aggression, plus let off steam. Competitive team sports need to be assertively encouraged.


  • The feminisation of schooling, whereby male teachers are on the decline, again leads to trouble. Teenage males need a strong hand, that is best delivered and administered by a strong male teacher. More male teachers are required.
Like it or not teenage males, if left to their own devices, are a bloody nuisance and a danger to themselves and others.

On the assumption that we as a society do not intend to start sterilising people, or sealing off deprived areas with watch towers and fences, then the only option we have is to take the time and trouble to address the issues above and reverse the damage that Nanny has done.

We will hear a lot from Nanny, and the media, in the coming weeks over this. Brown will tell us that he will ensure that gun crime is eliminated, and that the gang culture will be eradicated.

However, unless his solutions cover the above issues, there will be no change for the good whatsoever.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Educashun

EducashunI recently came across this open letter written by a physics teacher, Wellington Grey, and posted on his website.

He decries the failures of Nanny's physics exam system, and questions the relevance of the questions asked on the subject.

I suspect there are teachers, of other subjects, throughout the country who could write equally damning letters about Nanny's failing educashun system.

For once, I will shut up and let someone else do the talking.

Here is Wellington Grey's letter in full:

"I am a physics teacher. Or, at least I used to be. My subject is still called physics. My pupils will sit an exam and earn a GCSE in physics, but that exam doesn’t cover anything I recognize as physics. Over the past year the UK Department for Education and the AQA board changed the subject. They took the physics out of physics and replaced it with… something else, something nebulous and ill defined. I worry about this change. I worry about my pupils, I worry about the state of science education in this country, and I worry about the future physics teachers — if there will be any.

I graduated from a prestigious university with a degree in physics and pursued a lucrative career in economics which I eventually abandoned to teach. Economics and business, though vastly easier than my subject, and more financially rewarding, bored me. I went into teaching to return to the world of science and to, in what extent I could, convey to pupils why one would love a subject so difficult.

For a time I did. For a time, I was happy.

But this past academic year things changed. The Department for Education and the AQA board brought in a new syllabus for the sciences. One which greatly increased the teaching of `how science works.’ While my colleagues expressed scepticism, I was hopeful. After all, most pupils will not follow science at a higher level, so we should at least impart them with a sense of what it can tell us about our universe.

That did not happen

The result is a fiasco that will destroy physics in England.

The thing that attracts pupils to physics is its precision. Here, at last, is a discipline that gives real answers that apply to the physical world. But that precision is now gone. Calculations — the very soul of physics — are absent from the new GCSE. Physics is a subject unpolluted by a torrent of malleable words, but now everything must be described in words.

In this course, pupils debate topics like global warming and nuclear power. Debate drives science, but pupils do not learn meaningful information about the topics they debate. Scientific argument is based on quantifiable evidence. The person with the better evidence, not the better rhetoric or talking points, wins. But my pupils now discuss the benefits and drawbacks of nuclear power plants, without any real understanding of how they work or what radiation is.

I want to teach my subject, to pass on my love of physics to those few who would appreciate it. But I can’t. There is nothing to love in the new course. I see no reason that anyone taking this new GCSE would want to pursue the subject. This is the death of physics.

Specific Complaints:
My complaints about the new syllabus fall into four categories: the vague, the stupid, the political, and the non-science.

The Vague:
The specification provided by the AQA (available at their website) is vaguely worded. Every section starts with either the phrase ‘to evaluate the possible hazards and uses of…’ or ‘to compare the advantages and disadvantages of…’ without listing exactly what hazards, uses, advantages or disadvantages the board actually requires pupils to learn. The amount of knowledge on any given topic, such as the electromagnetic spectrum, could fill an entire year at the university level. But no guidance is given to teachers and, as a result, the exam blindsides pupils with questions like:

Suggest why he [a dark skinned person] can sunbathe with less risk of getting skin cancer than a fair skinned person.

To get the mark, pupils must answer:

More UV absorbed by dark skin (more melanin)
Less UV penetrates deep to damage living cells / tissue
Nowhere does the specification mention the words sunscreen or melanin. It doesn’t say pupils need to know the difference between surface dead skin and deeper living tissue. There is no reason any physics teacher would cover such material, or why any pupil should expect to be tested on it.

The Stupid:
On topics that are covered by the specification, the exam board has answers that indicate a lack of knowledge on the writer’s part. One question asks `why would radio stations broadcast digital signals rather than analogue signals?’ An acceptable answer is:

Can be processed by computer / ipod [sic]
Aside from the stupidity of the answer, (iPods, at the time of this writing, don’t have radio tuners and computers can process analogue signals) writing the mark scheme in this way is thoughtless, as teachers can only give marks that exactly match its language. So does the pupil get the mark if they mention any other mp3 player? Technically, no. Wikipedia currently lists 63 different players. Is it safe to assume that the examiner will be familiar with all of them? Doubtful.

If the question is not poorly worded, or not covered in the specification, it will be insultingly easy. The first question on a sample paper started:

A newspaper article has the heading: ‘Are mobiles putting our children at risk?’ A recent report said that children under the age of nine should not use mobile phones…

The first question on the paper was:

Below which age is it recommended that children use a mobile phone in emergencies only?

This is the kind of reading comprehension question I would expect in a primary school English lesson, not a secondary school GCSE.

The Political:
The number of questions that relate to global warming is appalling. I do not deny that pupils should know about the topic, nor do I deny its importance. However, it should not be the main focus of every topic. The pupils (and their teachers) are growing apathetic from overexposure.

A paper question asked: `Why must we develop renewable energy sources?’ This is a political question. Worse yet, a political statement. I’m not saying I disagree with it, just that it has no place on a physics GCSE paper.

Pupils are taught to poke holes in scientific experiments, to constantly find what is wrong. However, never are the pupils given ways to determine when an experiment is reliable, to know when an experiment yields information about the world that we can trust. This encourages the belief that all quantitative data is unreliable and untrustworthy. Some of my pupils, after a year of the course, have gone from scientifically minded individuals to thinking, “It’s not possible to know anything, so why bother?” Combining distrust of scientific evidence with debates won on style and presentation alone is an unnerving trend that will lead society astray.

The Non-scientific:
Lastly, I present the final question on the January physics exam in its entirety:

Electricity can also be generated using renewable energy sources. Look at this information from a newspaper report.

The energy from burning bio-fuels, such as woodchip and straw, can be used to generate electricity.
Plants for bio-fuels use up carbon dioxide as they grow.
Farmers get grants to grow plants for bio-fuels.
Electricity generated from bio-fuels can be sold at a higher price than electricity generated from burning fossil fuels.
Growing plants for bio-fuels offers new opportunities for rural communities.
Suggest why, apart from the declining reserves of fossil fuels, power companies should use more bio-fuels and less fossil fuels to generate electricity.


The only marks that a pupil can get are for saying:

Overall add no carbon dioxide to the environment
Power companies make more profit
Opportunity to grew new type of crop (growing plants in swamps)
More Jobs
None of this material is in the specification, nor can a pupil reliably deduce the answers from the given information. Physics isn’t a pedestrian subject about power companies and increasing their profits, or jobs in a rural community, it’s is about far grander and broader ideas.

Conclusion:
My pupils complained that the exam did not test the material they were given to study, and they are largely correct. The information tested was not in the specification given to the teachers, nor in the approved resources suggested by the AQA board. When I asked AQA about the issues with their exam they told me to write a letter of complaint, and this I have done. But, rather than mail it to AQA to sit ignored on a desk, I am making it public in the hope that more attention can be brought to this problem.

There is a teacher shortage in this country, but if a physicist asked my advice on becoming a teacher, I would have to say: don’t. Don’t unless you want to watch a subject you love dismantled.

I am a young and once-enthusiastic physics teacher. I despair at what I am forced to teach. I have potentially thirty years of lessons to give, but I didn’t sign up for this — and the business world still calls. There I won’t have to endure the pain of trying to animate a crippled subject. The rigors of physics have been torn down and replaced with impotent science media studies.

I beg of the government and the AQA board, please, give me back my subject and let me do my job.

Sincerely,

Wellington Grey"

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Nanny Bans Welsh

Nanny Bans WelshI couldn't but help snigger when I read about Nanny banning the speaking of Welsh by telephone operators. Given that majority of people who live in Wales can't speak Welsh, it always seems to me an absurd waste of time and money that Nanny insists on dual language road signs and speakers in government offices etc.

Anyhoo, Nanny has decided that the speaking of Welsh could damage the vocal chords. Therefore union officials have succeeded in persuading the Vale of Glamorgan council to ban the traditional greetings "bore da" - meaning "good morning" - and "prynhawn da" - meaning "good afternoon".

The argument runs along the lines that as the workers first language is English, they could harm themselves trying to pronounce the phrases. They added the ban was in keeping with Health and Safety Executive's recommendation that call centre workers limit their phone time to preserve their vocal chords.

What a load of bollocks!

How can anyone take these people seriously if they waste their time and energy on such an absurd issue?

Needless to say, the local Plaid Cymru Councillor Steffan Williams was up in arms.

Quote:

"I can't see how saying 'bore da'

will do people in a call centre any harm
."

He then shot his credibility in the gonads by claiming that it was an infringement of human rights...bollocks!

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Educashun

EducashunNanny's approach to child "discipline" has always been a tad schizophrenic. On the one hand she is a strong advocate of ASBO's etc for all manner of offences (ranging from vandalism, to simply kicking a football around in the street), yet on the other hand she strongly disapproves of parents or teachers administering anything resembling a cuff round the back of the head etc.

It is hardly surprising then that children grow up confused and aggressive, they have no boundaries and are given the impression that the teachers/parents are a soft touch.

Nanny has recently added to this confusion, by issuing new guidance on school discipline. This "guidance" advises teachers against repeatedly praising only "the same good pupils", er isn't that called encouragement?.

Nanny has a "brilliant solution" to this evil encouragement of good pupils, she suggests that rewards also be given to persistent miscreants who show an improvement in behaviour...no matter how small.

Coming soon, "good news" postcards:

"Little Johnny did not swear at teacher today...hoorah!"

According to Nanny:

"This can help improve relations with parents

who have become tired of receiving letters

and phone calls when things go wrong
."

What about the teachers who are "tired" of being on the receiving end of all of that shit?

By the way folks, teachers are now expected to take account of race/culture when giving a telling off. Seemingly, if you come from a "loud" culture, then it's alright to be a loud git.

Th concept of integration (where people integrate into the British culture) hasn't quite reached Nanny yet, has it? It seems that the British culture must adapt to others.

Nanny emphasises that teachers should understand the importance of showing respect to children from racial or religious backgrounds, for whom public humiliation is seen as particularly shameful.

Errmmm again, this shows a remarkable misunderstanding of how children function. Humiliation is the most effective means of controlling badly behaved children, by forcing them to act within limits set by the cultural/social norms of their peer groups and society.

Nanny's guidance is, without a doubt, a recipe for disaster.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Wasting Your Money


The regulars amongst you will know that I am an FCA and auditor, with a few years' experience of working in multi nationals around the world.

One of the many things that I have learned, aside from always going to the loo before a meeting and drying my hands afterwards, is that bonuses should be used to reward good results and exceptional performance.

Bonuses should not be used to reward failure.

Therefore I have to ask the question, why the hell have the staff at the Child Support Agency Staff (CSA) been paid over £25M in bonuses; given that the CSA is a total load of old bollocks!

Even Bliary Poppins herself has said that the organ is not "fit for purpose".

In 2002-03 £11M was paid in the form of bonuses, and £4M was paid last year (when John Hutton the Work and Pensions Secretary announced that the CSA was to be scrapped).

The CSA has a backlog of nearly 240,000 cases, and more than £3.5 billion of uncollected debts on its books.

Around one in five calculations or assessments are inaccurate, and it currently takes around 36 weeks to deal with new applications.

CSA staff admitted entering inaccurate information about families into the agency's computer system, and redirecting calls to answer phones.

Well done lads!

Needless to say Nanny's Department for Work and Pensions think the bonuses are great.

Quote:

"The bonus scheme, agreed by the unions, rewards the hard work of individuals.

CSA staff are, of course, eligible to be recognised in this way.

The CSA's well documented problems stem from the design of the system

introduced in 1993, but staff should not be punished for them
."

Sorry, but have I totally misunderstood my last 20 years in business, aren't salaries meant to reward people for their work?

Money well spent!

There you go folks, in Nanny's world lousy work gets rewarded, especially when it's you and I that are paying for it!

Monday, February 05, 2007

Big Brother

Big Brother
Those of you who enjoy interacting with the taxman, may be pleased to hear that you may have even more opportunities to "interact" with him in the future.

Seemingly taxpayers may have their phones tapped and their homes bugged in the future, if new surveillance powers are granted to HM Revenue & Customs tax inspectors.

Nanny's chums in HMRC claim that inspectors need such powers to tackle the growing threat from organised and white-collar crime.

Needless to say not everyone is convinced, lawyers and accountants argue that these powers could breach human rights rules.

Harry Travers, a solicitor who specialises in defending clients targeted by HMRC, says that the new powers were a possible breach of the European Convention on Human Rights.

Quote:

"A number of Customs and Excise prosecutions have spectacularly collapsed

in recent years due to the abuse by officers of their powers,

not because their powers were inadequate
."

Nanny's chums in the HMRC are nonplussed by the objections. A spokesman for HMRC claims that the new powers for bugging are a rational move, after the merger of Customs and the Inland Revenue in 2005.

Oh joy!

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Dummies

DummiesIt is reassuring to know, that as Babylon burns (so to speak), Nanny focuses her gimlet eye on the things that really matter.

To this end she has banned Sid and Alma from standing outside a Sidmouth lifeboat station.

Now, I hear you ask, who are Sid and Alma Ken?

I will tell you.

Sid and Alma are two life sized mannequins, who have been used to collect donations for a lifeboat charity. They have been dressed in full lifeboat uniform of life jacket and helmet, and each have a bucket for people to donate cash.

Sid and Alma have been very popular, and have managed to bring in around £15K each year.

The money funds the local lifeboat, the Pride of Plymouth.

Can you guess what the problem is here?

Yes, that's right...they don't have a licence to collect the money!

Some interfering busy body in December, with too much time on their hands (the sort of person who would have found gainful employment in the Gestapo) complained that they are collecting money illegally.

You see folks, anyone who uses a tin to accept money for charity in public needs a collector's permit from the local authority.

The busy body...let us hope that this person is never in need of a lifeboat..lodged their complaint with East Devon District Council.

Nanny's chums in the council, never ones to let common sense get in the way of the law, state that under licensing laws the mannequins may have to be removed.

Sidmouth Lifeboat secretary, Philip Churchill, thinks that this is a load of bollocks.

Quote:

"The dummies are incredibly important to us

and provide a significant part of our income.

If they went, we would have extreme difficulties replacing that income.

We rely on these collections.

"Visitors have their photographs taken with them

they are a good tourist attraction
."

Seemingly East Devon District Council have nothing better to do than act as jobsworths, and are now using taxpayers' money to investigate whether the dummies are operating illegally.

Sid and Alma can apply for a licence. However, they would need to be over 16 and fill out a form with their name, address, phone number and date of birth.

They would also need a letter from their charity, confirming they are an authorised collector 28 days before they begin.

A petition to save Sid and Alma has been set up by the lifeboat station, you can sign it here Save Sid and Alma.

Feel free to tell Nanny's chums in East Devon District Council what you think of them, via this link: Dummies.

The list of councillors, and their email addresses, can be accessed via this link Dummy List.

Give them my love:)

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Nanny Bans Wireless

Nanny Bans WirelessThe truly remarkable thing about Nanny and her followers is that they are happy to make decisions, and act, on "faith based analysis" totally devoid of any scientific study or verifiable evidence.

That's the beauty of knowing that you are right, you never have to check the validity of your decision making. At this stage I could make a snide comment about President Bush's and Prime Minister Blair's Iraq "policy", but that would be a tad off topic.

Anyhoo, it seems that Nanny's followers are getting themselves into a right "two and eight" (rhyming slang for "state") over wireless networks.

It seems that some parents and teachers (remember Nanny comes in many forms; "Nanny is a Nanny does") are forcing some schools to dismantle wireless computer networks.

Why?

Well these people, despite having no hard scientific evidence, are of the belief that wireless networks pose a danger to their precious childrens' health.

The fear is that the low levels of microwave radiation emitted by the transmitters could be harmful, causing loss of concentration, headaches, fatigue, memory and behavioural problems and possibly cancer in the long term.

Nanny's followers lobbied hard at Prebendal School, in Chichester West Sussex, and have persuaded the headteacher, Tim Cannell, to remove the wireless network in October.

Mr Cannell said:

"We listened to the parents' views

and they were obviously very concerned.

We also did a lot of research.

The authorities say it's safe,

but there have been no long-term studies to prove this
."

The key part being that there is no evidence to say that it is dangerous, yet they remove it anyway; a decision based purely on ignorance and fear.

Vivienne Baron, who is bringing up Sebastian, her 10 year old grandson, said:

"I did not want Sebastian exposed to a wireless computer network at school.

No real evidence has been produced

to prove that this new technology is safe in the long term.

Until it is, I think we should take a precautionary approach and use cabled systems
."

How does she know that cable technology is safe?

How does she know that pc's are safe in the long term?

They have only been with us for 20 years or so, damage caused by serious long term exposure to pc's might not be evident for another 20 years or more.

You see folks, what we think of as safe is based more often than not on our prejudices and fears, rather than hard reliable scientific fact.

At Ysgol Pantycelyn, a comprehensive in Carmarthenshire, parents put paid to the wireless network there too.

I would make the following observations; based on my own prejudices, fears and ignorance:
  • Were we to have had this fuss when fire was invented, we would still be eating raw meat and huddled together in animal skins. Fire is dangerous, it has a habit of burning things and killing people. Yet we have used it for thousands of years.


  • I wonder if Sebastian's granny, or the parents of all the other "Sebastians" allow their sprogs to use mobile phones?

    I bet many of them do.

    Aren't these meant to be slightly dubious as well? Don't these emit low level microwave radiation?

    Do I smell the faint whiff of hypocrisy here?


  • Do these same parents of "Sebastians" have pc's, wireless networks, tv's etc at home?

    I bet many do?

    Again, there is a whiff of hypocrisy in the air.
I wonder what the next panic will be about?

What do you think is dangerous and should be banned?

Remember folks, don't worry about using facts to justify your campaign or arguments; blind prejudice and ignorance is all we need in Nanny's Britain!

Monday, September 25, 2006

Yah Boo Yahrooh!

Yarooh!
Nanny never ceases to interfere in our daily lives, no matter how old you are Nanny always finds a way to step in and try to take control.

Recently Nanny's chums from Avon and Somerset police decided that it would be a good idea to start a new campaign to fight hate crime in schools.

The campaign's title just slips off the tongue, "Everyone is Different, It's Not a Crime". Nanny believes, quite rightly, that people should not be victimised because of their faith, race, sexual orientation or disability.

In the past it would simply be a matter for the parents and teachers to "pull little Jimmy's ear" when he was making a pain of himself to Fatty Jenkins of the Lower Fourth. However, now such issues are deemed worthy of state intervention, and every secondary school in the Avon and Somerset police area has been made to sign up to the "True Vision" set of principles.

"True Vision", how very Orwellian!

Needless to say, this campaign is based on Nanny's warped view of the world; as such children will be proactively encouraged to report "hate crime".

In other words children will be trained to "snitch" on their comrades. Those of you who still remember school will surely recall that the class "snitch" never prospered. However, by training children to "snitch" to the state Nanny is preparing them for adulthood when they will be acting as her spies in the street.

In addition to training a whole legion of state informants, Nanny will also be ensuring that what might seem like harmless playground words can in fact become a hate crime.

The "initiative" was launched by Home Office Policing Minister Tony McNulty and Avon and Somerset Chief Constable Colin Port.

Det Insp Mark Rolfe, who is responsible for dealing with hate crime across the force, said:

"We believe that hate crime may well have gone unreported

in schools in the past

and there may be victims who have never had the support of the criminal justice system
."

Nanny will set up a 24 hour phone line for "hate crimes" to be reported, people (ie children) caught using threatening or offensive language or behaviour can be charged and taken to court.

The maximum punishment for such an offence is six months in prison or a £5,000 fine.

So, if Jenkins minor calls Braithwaite a "four eyed fat git" does that constitute a hate crime?

I just don't see this working!

Children will be taught to inform on others and to let the state fight their battles for them, thus making them less able to face the real world.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Nanny's Nazi State

Nanny's Nazi State

Nazi Germany, just like other totalitarian regimes, maintained its grip on power by encouraging members of the public to report every misdemeanour (thought, word and deed) perpetrated by fellow citizens against the state.

The result being that many used this a means of settling old scores and of enjoying, what so many humans really crave deep down in the darkest reaches of their soul, power over others.

Nanny has decided to revive this most reviled and disgusting tools of the state; this time she will be directing it against her pet hate, smokers.

Nanny has decreed that people, your friends neighbours and colleagues, should "shop" (snitch, grass up, inform, tell tales on etc) smokers in order to enforce her ban on lighting up in public places.

Nanny will set up a special 0800 number for members of the public to call with their tales of fellow citizens breaking Nanny's no smoking edict. The tip offs will be passed to town halls, when the ban comes into force next summer.

Colleagues will also be able to use the hotline to name individuals flouting the ban at work, and in other enclosed public places. That should make for a pleasant atmosphere at work.

Once duly "tipped off" environmental health officers will then launch surveillance operations and raids to catch pubs, clubs, restaurants or other venues that are illegally allowing smoking.

Can you believe this?

We live in a society where people are afraid of muggings, assaults, robberies and terrorism; yet the entire apparatus of the state is being directed towards catching smokers!

There is something very wrong with Nanny's priorities. There is also something offensive and evil about encouraging people to spy on each other.

Individuals who are duly entrapped by Nanny, will be fined £50 or £200 (if they refuse to pay immediately). Owners of premises allowing illegal smoking will face a fine of £2,500. Failure to display a no smoking sign results in a £200 on the spot fine or a £1,000 court fine.

The person who is spearheading Nanny's Nazi spy idea is health minister Andy Burnham, quote:

"Implementation of the ban from summer 2007 will mean that 99 per cent of employees will be working in a smoke-free environment.

We know from the experience of other countries that smoke-free legislation is largely self-enforcing.

However, we are proposing to introduce a smoke-free

compliance line as a supportive measure
."

Nice to see that Nanny has come up with another effective method of destroying what little trust and respect people may have had left for their local councils, as it will be these bodies that receive the tips and then initiate the surveillance procedures.

It seems that the greatest enemy to the freedom of the people of Britain is the government and its second rate cousins in local government, not foreign terrorists.

The way to break Nanny’s control over us is to fight back. I suggest that when this Nazi Informant Line is set up, everyone inundates it with false reports naming members of the government and local councillors.

In the meantime, I suggest that we all drop Andy Burnham a note telling him what we think of living in a Nazi state.

Burnham’s phone number : 01942 682 353

Web contact details www.andyburnham.org

Fight back!

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Nanny Bans Cartoon Smoking

Nanny Bans Cartoon SmokingNanny Knows Best has been up and running for almost two years now, during this time I have written many articles about Nanny's nasty little rules and absurd political correctness.

Given Nanny's daily output of rules and regulations there is a danger that one becomes somewhat "numb", for want of a better word, to Nanny and her rules. As such, sometimes, even I have to step back and read a few times what I have written before the absurdity (no, I don't mean that I write in an absurd fashion!) of it really sinks in.

However, in this particular case my dander was well and truly up before I even set finger to keyboard.

I think it is the combination of the sad little loser being able to stifle artistic creativity, and the fact that a large media organ is playing out Orwell's warning about history being literally airbrushed away that has really got my dander up.

Anyhoo, it seems that in shades of Orwell's 1984, history is being airbrushed away by Turner Broadcasting.

This all started when some sad loser, with nothing better to do than complain, made a complaint to British media regulator Ofcom about the content of a couple of Tom and Jerry cartoons.

Horror of horrors, they showed Tom smoking!

Needless to say, "Disgusted of Pratt's Bottom" or wherever the sad little loser resides took umbridge at this, and told Ofcom that these scenes (scripted back in the 40's) would encourage children to smoke.

Ofcom, following Nanny's mantra that the prejudices of the minority outweigh the commonsense of the majority, immediately sprang into action. Disregarding any form of commonsense they contacted Turner Broadcasting (part of Time Warner) who own the channel (Boomerang) on which the offending cartoons were aired, and asked them to stop showing them.

Turner, showing no backbone whatsoever (this is the result of living and working in the Nanny state), not only complied but are now scouring more than 1,500 classic cartoons including; Tom and Jerry, The Flintstones and Scooby-Doo to edit out scenes that "glamorise" smoking.

Yinka Akindele, spokeswoman for Turner in Europe, said:

"We are going through the entire catalogue.

This is a voluntary step we've taken in light of the changing times
."

I have a number of points to make about this nonsense:

1 What about the numerous occasions when Tom and Jerry do immense damage to each other with pots, pans, guns, explosives etc? Are these not also a danger to "innocent" children?

2 Smoking was de rigeur in the 40's and 50's. The cartoons are a reflection of the social mores of the day. To pretend otherwise and airbrush them in this "Nazi/Soviet like" manner, is to deny our own history and to lie to the children. Is this the way we want to raise children, with a lie?

3 Many other characters from history smoke, real and imaginary; Popeye, Churchill etc. Should we airbrush them too?

4 Why does the prejudiced view of one sad loser carry more weight with Nanny and her acolytes, than the unspoken views of the majority?

5 Given the fact that, in Nanny's world, the views of the minority carry more weight than that of the majority I would ask you top drop Turner and Ofcom a line to the effect that:

"I was appalled to learn that you are airbrushing historical cartoons to comply with the prejudiced views of one individual, who has a grudge against smoking.

I would note that your actions are depriving children of a true and accurate historical perspective of society in the 1940's and 50's, and as such your actions constitute a breach of the rules that require impartial and accurate broadcasting.

I would also note that by taking these actions, as a result of the complaint of only one person, you are in effect liable to accusations of being biased and prejudice; ie you are guilty of discrimination.

In view of this I would like to raise a formal complaint with you about this matter, and request that you investigate and reconsider your actions.

I would note, that since you have taken these actions based purely on one complaint, you are obliged to respond to my complaint with the same attention to detail and thoroughness.

I will, depending on your response, consider taking the matter further."

Here are some useful addresses for you to send the above to:

Offcom - graham.howell@ofcom.org.uk

Investor Relations Time Warner - ir@timewarner.com

Turner
Phone 404.827.1700
Address: 1 CNN Center
100 International Blvd.
Atlanta GA 30348
USA

Boomerang - toon.pressoffice@turner.com

Time Warner Board
c/o Office of the Corporate Secretary
Time Warner Inc.
One Time Warner Center
New York, NY 10019
USA

Don't let 1984 happen because of apathy.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Nanny Bans Photos

Nanny has something of an obsession with paedophiles at the moment, don't know why; maybe they just make an easy target, much like "witches" did in the 16th century.

Paedo stories certainly give the tabloids something to scream about, when the stories of alleged terrorist plots are thin on the ground.

Anyhoo, Nanny's obsession hit home to Suzanne Hansford the other week. Mrs Hansford was banned from taking photos of a four year old child in a paddling pool on Southampton Common.

You might, at this point, say fair enough. However, I should point out that Mrs Hansford was the girl's grandmother on a day out with her grandchild Amber.

Amber was taking her first dip in a pool.

Mrs Hansford was just about to take the photo, when one of Nanny's park attendants told her that she couldn't because of council regulations.

Seemingly the "good old boys" of Southampton City Council have issued an edict that no photos can be taken at its pools and leisure facilities, due to the current hysteria that paedophiles might obtain illicit snaps of young children.

Mrs Hansford said:

"Are we now to be denied having photographic memories of our children and grandchildren?

I was so annoyed.

There are thousands of law-abiding people out there,

just trying to enjoy the summer and take happy family pictures.

Why should we be penalised for the degenerates in our society?
"

Southampton City Council ignored her argument, and note that exceptions could only be made for groups, such as Brownies or Cubs.

Er what makes the Brownies and Cubs so special then?

Oh in case you think that the Brownies and Cubs are getting extra special treatment, I should point out that they have to make an application in writing to the council and get parental permission from each child to be photographed.

Ludicrous isn't it?

Paul Shearman, Southampton City Council's outdoor sports manager, rolled out the tired old mantra used by jobsworths around the country:

"Health and safety is paramount in making each customer experience a positive one when visiting our pool.

As a preventative safety and comfort measure we do run a policy of restricting the use of cameras, including camera phones.

We would ask for understanding of this policy but do appreciate and accept that this may disappoint a minority of customers
."

Does he really believe that pile of shit?

I wonder, does the council actually have the right to do this?

Supposing that Mrs Hansford had actually taken the photo, could they have sued her?

On what grounds?

Would they have to allege, and prove, that she was a paedophile?

I suspect they would have done the usual cowardly Nanny trick and pressed a lesser charge, totally unconnected with the alleged offence that they are claiming to protect children from.

Nanny has a very sick mind, she needs to be relieved of her position.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Prats of The Week

Prats of The WeekThis week's prestigious Prat of The Week Award goes to the good people of Camden Council, or rather their parking control department (or whatever they choose to call it).

I am sure that the hapless driver of a Meyers of Stratford lorry will agree with this award, as he encountered a jobsworth prat from the council in Belsize Park the other week.

The driver was travelling along a road, weakened by water from a burst main below. Then the front wheel of his truck had got stuck, axle deep, in a hole after the road collapsed beneath the vehicle.

Needless to say, the responsibility for maintaining the roads lies with the council...so you might suggest that it was their fault.

Anyhoo, the driver the tried to shift his trapped truck. At this point a jobsworth traffic warden turned up. The good lady from the legion of wardens did what she does best, instead of helping, she provided the hapless driver with a ticket.

Rather like an old Laurel and Hardy film, a small crowd of astonished onlookers gathered to watch the "comedy" show. The driver tried in vain to explain his predicament. However, the jobsworth warden just shrugged and told him he could appeal against the fine.

Sue Melkman, a resident, said:

"It's crazy.

There was water everywhere.

It was obvious what had happened but she still wrote the ticket.

She wouldn't engage in conversation.

All she would say was, 'You can appeal'.

It's the daftest decision.

How can you give a ticket to someone who's stuck in a hole?

The woman must live in a parallel universe.

It's so ridiculous.

Everyone was laughing at her

and a few were taking pictures on their phones.

I told her she'd be a laughing stock

and it would be in the local paper but she didn't reply.

She just wrote the ticket and off she went.

The poor driver tried to reason with her,

but what can you do?

If they're going to write a ticket they just do it.

He took it very philosophically
."

The incident was sparked by decision from the ever respected and useful Thames Water (who leak a gazillion gallons of water every day). Dear old Thames Water had decided not to put cones around the bulging, cracked patch of road after inspecting it the previous day.

By the way, the German owners of Thames Water have decided to sell it; any takers?

One resident of the street said:

"It was really the water board's fault.

A water main burst outside my house at about 7.30pm on Thursday evening,

and at about 10 o'clock Thames Water came along to see what was happening.

I saw them with some cones in their hands,

but then they put them back in their van.

The road was bulging and cracks were appearing.

There's a fire station nearby

and I was worried the road might collapse if a fire engine went over it

but the engineers said it was fine

and they would be back to fix it the next day.

Then at 7.30 next morning a lorry came to collect a skip from my neighbour

and he just sank down into the road to his axle.

They came to fix the water main in the middle of it all

but couldn't because the lorry was on top of it
."

Sounds like Thames Water also deserve the Prat of The Week award.

Meyers of Stratford said:

"Camden Council said we can appeal

but what a waste of everyone's time.

Now we've got to write the letters and send off the forms.

It was absolutely obvious why the truck was there

but she still fined us.

It makes you sick
."

Nanny makes us all sick.

Her rules, red tape and indifference are designed to beat us into submission.

Anyhoo, congratulations to Camden Council for winning this prestigious award.

Feel free to email them via this link Camden Council, to tell them that they have won.

Monday, July 31, 2006

The Dangers of Trees!

The Dangers of Trees!It may be advisable to warn your children that Naughty Nanny is on the prowl again. This time she is looking for those children who have the cheek to build tree houses.

Tree houses, you see ladies and gentlemen, are the work of the devil and are banned!

Sam Cannon, Amy Higgins and Katy Smith (12-year-old friends planning to build themselves a den in a cherry tree) from Halesowen, West Midlands, found this out to their cost recently.

The kids climbed the 20ft tree, then found themselves frogmarched to a police station and locked in cells for up to two hours.

Nanny's ever vigilant police then removed the childrens' shoes, took mugshots, DNA samples and mouth swabs.

Funny that gangs of yobs, criminals, drug dealers and other assorted scumbags are not treated in the same way isn't it?

Nanny's police told the children they had been seen damaging the tree, which is in a wooded area of public land near their homes.

The police interrogated the children, who admitted that they had broken some loose branches because they had wanted to build a tree house.

Hardly worth a DNA swab is it?

Nanny felt otherwise, and seriously considered charging the children with criminal damage. However, very graciously for Nanny, she eventually decided that a reprimand (the equivalent of a caution for juveniles) was sufficient.

The hapless children will now have their details will be kept on file for up to five years.

Is this a police state or what?

Sam's father, Nicholas, said:

"The children did not deserve to be treated in the way they were.

A simple ticking-off by officers would have been sufficient.

The children didn't realise they were doing anything wrong,


they didn't deliberately set out to damage the tree.

Sam's eyes were swollen and red when they let him out of the cell


as he had been crying.

He is a placid child and has never been in trouble before.

When I got the phone call from the police to say Sam was in custody

I thought he'd done something-like steal something from a shop.

I couldn't believe it when he said all he had done was break some loose branches off a tree.

To detain them,


DNA them and treat them that way was simply cruel and an over-reaction by the police.

Generations of children have played in that tree

and my son and his friends won't be the first to have thought of building a tree den
."

Superintendent Stuart Johnson, operations manager at Halesowen police station, said:

"I support the actions of my officers who responded to complaints from the public about kids destroying an ornamental cherry tree by stripping every branch from it,

in an area where there have been reports of anti-social behaviour.

A boy and two girls were arrested


and received a police reprimand for their behaviour.

West Midlands Police deals robustly with anti-social behaviour.

By targeting what may seem relatively low-level crime

we aim to prevent it developing into more serious matters
."

You will note that he happily ignored commenting on why the police needed DNA samples.

I assume then that the crime statistics for drug offences, assaults, robbery, knife crime etc in the West Midlands area are at an all time low?

Please can residents of the West Midlands comment on this.

Rod Morgan, chairman of the Youth Justice Board for England and Wales, said:

"It's my opinion that too many children are being criminalised for behaviour that could be dealt with informally

by ticking them off and speaking to their parents
."

Doubtless the police will log this as a success in their records, which Nanny uses to judge the efficiency of the police.

After all, it is easy to arrest a 12 year old; seemingly not that easy to break up a gang of yobs, terrifying a council estate, or crack down on scumbag drug users/pushers.

It's not the quality of crime prevention that counts in Britain, it's the quantity!

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Tuck Off!

Tuck Off!I really do think that Nanny is overstepping herself this time. Aside from her non stop lecturing about how badly we eat, and what we should be feeding our children, she has now taken it upon herself to inspect that most sacrosanct of a schoolchild's satchel the tuck box!

The Fat Owl of the Remove would be rolling in his grave at the very thought.

Nanny's chums at Bayards Hill Primary School in Barton have taken it upon themselves to inspect the contents of tuck boxes (lunch containers to you), and confiscate foods that they consider to be the creation of Beelzebub!

Nanny knicked the kids' chocolate and crisps.

Hah!

In my day she just confiscated your porn mags!

Keith Ponsford, the headteacher of Bayards Hill Primary School in Barton, admitted that maybe his said staff had been "a bit vigorous".

Last term the school wrote to parents urging them not to send their children in with chocolate and crisps.

On the subject of crisps I offer you the following thoughts and factoids:

1 They are a very good source of vitamin C...yes, really!

2 My mum used to make home made crisps for me to take to school, with grated cheese and extra salt. They were bloody good, and they did me no harm; I am 42, gorgeous, slim and am told that I have the body of a 41 year old.

Yah boo and sucks to you Nanny!

Anyhoo, Nanny confiscated all the offending snacks.

Poor Christopher Cummins, aged seven, fell foul of Nanny's tuck off regime; much to the annoyance of his mum, Debbie.

In true British style, she and 20 other mums marched to the school this week to give Nanny a right old ear bashing.

She said:

"I've got no problem with healthy eating I've got a problem with schools and the Government telling me what to do.

Christopher's packed lunch contained a sandwich, fruit juice, a yoghurt, a packet of crisps and a chocolate biscuit.

Normally I give them a mixed salad with apples,

oranges,

grapes and pear.

What made me angry was that the school canteen actually served pizza and chips

the same day it was taking packets of crisps off children.

So it's one rule for hot and one for cold?

How long until they start telling us what to give them at home?

Where are they going to draw the line

about how we bring up our own children?"


Exactly!

Assistant head Elma Cameron is coordinating the health drive, and said that the school would hold workshops with parents to help them improve their children's health.

Good grief...work shops!

It is not the state's place to act as "mother and father"...of course Nanny does this to ensure that she makes us dependent on her.

However, those of you are worried that your child's human rights will be infringed by this new hard line approach from Nanny should have no fear.

Children will still be able to bring the following items into school, unencumbered:

- Knives
- Mobile phones
- Porn
- Drugs
- Drink
- Fags
- Body piercings
- Ipods
- Glue

Nanny will of course also still be serving children the reprocessed high fat muck, that we all know and love, in her canteens!

Tuck Off Nanny!

PS My Mum's crisps recipe is as follows:

-Peel a large spud

-Use the potato peeler then to make the crisps

-Soak in water, then dry thoroughly

-Plunge into hot oil, and cook until just turning golden brown (the centres should be slightly soggy in my view)

Season with salt and grated cheese...Yum!

They can be stored in greaseproof paper when carried to school.