Educashun

Congratulations to David Smith, Nanny's headmaster at Darfield Upperwood Primary School, who proved his value for money by paying cash to his wife and son, going on holiday courtesy of the taxpayer and authorising overtime payments and consultancy fees for himself.

On one trip to London he even bought a suit for himself and his deputy with taxpayers' money.

Nanny's chums in Barnsley council published a report on his conduct, and council chiefs took him "very seriously to task" and expressed their "extreme displeasure".

However, the good news is Smith kept his job; because his motives were "totally honourable".

Such honourable actions included:

• A trip to Salzburg in Austria by Mr Smith and his deputy, to "find out how foreign schools teach foreign languages", cost £2,625, including £1,276 on 'bed and breakfast accommodation' and £270 on taxi fares to and from Stansted airport.



• In May 2003, 16 members of staff attended a 'training event' over three days at the four-star De Vere Belton Woods Hotel in Grantham, Lincolnshire.



• Mr Smith claimed £6,150, which he authorised himself, out of the £9,780 paid for overtime on Beacon projects over three years.

It was only taxpayers' money though.

The Dangers of Light Bulbs

I have written on several occasions about the similarity between Nanny and dear old Auntie (the BBC), they both have this tendency to think that they know better than the ordinary man/woman in the street as to how lives should be led.

Anyhoo good old Auntie has managed yet again to come up with an extravagant way to waste the licence fee, on a particularly daft health and safety "initiative".

Seemingly, in Auntie's world, it is highly dangerous to change a light bulb. Therefore she has banned her precious staff from performing this highly skilled and dangerous task. In future Auntie will be paying an electrician to do this.

The cost?

A mere £10 a bulb...bargain!

Louise Wordsworth, a learning project manager with the BBC, came across the problem first hand.

Quote:

"I called up to ask for a new light bulb

for my desk lamp and was told that this would cost £10.

On telling them I'd buy and replace the bulb myself

(bought for the bargain price of £1 for two bulbs)

I was told that it was against health and safety regulations.

So guess how many BBC colleagues it finally took

to change a light bulb (risking life and limb to do so)?"

They could of course revert to using candles I suppose?

This anti risk attitude by Auntie is kind of surprising given its past record of putting some people (the viewers) in danger, eg do I not recall many years ago a guest on Noel Edmond's show died in some bizarrely daft stunt?

Also, so reports would have you believe, one of the contestants in that fake "reality" show "The Apprentice" has had a history of serious mental problems; is she really suitable for such an intense and demanding show?

But hey, they are only the licence fee payers!

If anyone can give me a reasonably accurate estimate as to the number of light bulbs that are in Auntie's buildings across the UK, I will gladly send them a "Nanny Knows Best" T shirt.

Monkey See, Monkey Do

Nanny believes in the principle of leadership by example; in other words she seeks to teach her charges, via example, how they should lead their lives.

One of Nanny's chums in the Lords, Baroness Corston, is leading by example. When she was a lowly commoner and MP she twisted her ankle, or something similar, in the Houses of Parliament in 2003. Now she is claiming an enhanced sickness pension worth up to £24K a year.

However, before there is an out pouring of sorrow and grief for this poor lady, let us not forget that weeks after the 2005 election she was given a peerage and last year claimed £26K in attendance allowances and expenses.

One parliamentary source said:

"Several MPs have been given a higher pension

by saying they cannot carry on as MPs,

only to wash up in another job or the Lords."

Baroness Corston, who used to be a barrister (what is it about this current Labour government that attracts lawyers?), was the first female chairman of the backbench Parliamentary Labour Party group, and was the MP for Bristol East from 1992 until the last Election.

She has attended the Lords on 61 days last year and claimed £26,190 in allowances, made up of £16,890 in daily and overnight allowances and £9,300 in travel and office costs.

Value for money indeed!

The next time you lash out at the person in the street who claims compensation from a local council for tripping up, remember they are taking their cue from our "beloved" leaders.

Nanny Bans Purdah

Nanny is constantly on the look out for things that may offend people, no matter how trivial the issue she strives to ensure that not one person in Britain can ever be offended by anything someone else says or does.

Needless to say, this is an impossible task; as there is bound to be something that offends someone. I, for instance, find Nanny to be highly offensive.

Anyhoo, the latest word that Nanny believes may offend people is "purdah". This has been used by civil servants to describe the period leading up to an election, when politically sensitive announcements should not be made. Unfortunately, in Persian it also means curtain and in the Muslim world it takes two forms; physical segregation of the sexes, and the requirement for women to cover their bodies and conceal their form.

Nanny's chums in the Welsh Assembly have decided that for a non Muslim to use the word in reference to the pre election period is highly offensive to Muslims, therefore it has been banned during the Welsh Assembly election because it might offend Muslims and other religious groups.

An Assembly Government spokeswoman said:

"As the term 'pre-election period' is now

in common usage across the Assembly Government,

we didn't consider it necessary to give

specific guidance for the 2007 Assembly elections.

However, the guidance we issued to staff prior

to the 2005 General Election did contain such a reference.

'Don't use the term "purdah" to describe

the pre-election period. It has a specific meaning

for some religious groups and they may see

its use in this context as unduly flippant and offensive'".

What utter bollocks!

The word is clearly being used in a non offensive way, what rational sane person could find that to be offensive?

Hair Raising

Nanny is very fussy about id photos these days, what with the increased security scares that she keeps foisting on us.

Therefore it should come as no surprise to learn that she takes a dim view of anyone who "looks daft" in a passport photo.

Such was the fate the befell Eden Lurie, when she posed for a passport photo with spiky hair.

Nanny was less than impressed, the photographer told Eden that the photo would be rejected by Nanny's passport office.

Quite right!

Only problem being, that Eden was in fact only 4 months old.

Kate Lurie, Eden's mum, thought the photographic assistant was joking when he pointed to her daughter Eden's three-inch hair in the portrait and said:

"It's too spiky."

Margaret Matwiejew, photo team leader at Prestwich Pharmacy in Manchester, said:

"The Passport Office has gone over the top with its requirements."

Nanny has gone over the top in many of her requirements...sadly no one seems to be willing to stand up to her.

Sorry

Nanny's chums in the Church of England have got themselves into a bit of a state over slavery, which the British Empire abolished 200 years ago.

The Archbishop of Canterbury, Dr Rowan Williams has suggested that the Church might need to pay reparations, whilst the Archbishop of York, Dr John Sentamu, has said that an apology is required.

Here's why they are wrong:

• Britain was the first country in the modern world to abolish slavery, we have nothing to apologise for.



• Genetic trees show that there are more than a handful of "white" Brits with African origins; to whom should we apologise, ourselves?



• The Greeks used slaves, the Italians used Greek slaves, the Nazis used European and Jewish slaves, the Americans used African American slaves, the Africans use African slaves, Japan in the last war used sex slaves from China and Korea etc etc. Will they all be apologising too?



• Slavery still exists in the world today. Africans use children to fight in wars and to dig for diamonds, and East European girls are trafficked into Western brothels.



• Africans were selling Africans into slavery long before Britain ever set foot in the place.



• The wealth of the Church of England, and Britain as whole, is in part built on the profits of slavery. An apology cannot undo that.



• The West enjoys cheap goods and foodstuffs manufactured by people in the Far East, living on very very low wages, will we stop buying these goods? To apologise for slavery, yet still consume these goods is hypocritical.

You should no more regret the actions and policies of past centuries than you should regret the invention of gunpowder, the bow and arrow or the atomic bomb. What is done is done, move forward and look to the future.

An apology cannot change the past, and does not address the problems of the present.

Croydon's Re-educators

Ooooh, I am being a naughty boy in opposing Croydon Council's Compulsory Purchase Order (CPO) of land near East Croydon Station.

As such I have been invited for a friendly chat with some nice people, who want to re-educate me.

Shame on me for daring to oppose our beloved council!

The VAT Man Cometh

The VAT Man cometh.

Auntie Gets Her Knickers in a Twist

Britain is a very lucky country indeed, not only do we have Nanny protecting and guiding us but we also have Auntie (the BBC).

Auntie has long believed herself to be the guardian of everything that is right about Britain, so long as you share her views as to what constitutes her vision of a perfect Britain.

Indeed Auntie has even gone into bat against Nanny on a few occasions, using Nanny's Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) to unearth stories and issues that Nanny would prefer to be buried.

Unfortunately what is sauce for the goose, seems not to be sauce for the gander when it comes to using the FOIA on Auntie.

Some very naughty people have been using the FOIA to uncover an internal inquiry conducted by Malcolm Balen in 2004 about Auntie's coverage of the Middle East. The Balen report looked into whether Auntie's reporting is anti Israeli pro Palestinian. Auntie doesn't want that inquiry made public, and is spending £200K of licence payers' money (that's our money folks) in trying to hide the report from errrm us...the licence payers.

A truly Nanny type action if ever there was one!

Auntie is to spend the money on fighting a High Court action next week, in order to prevent the Balen report, which is expected to be critical of Auntie's coverage of the Middle East, becoming public.

The story began a wee while ago when a solicitor, Steven Sugar, made an FOIA request. Auntie refused, and the Information Commissioner Richard Thomas agreed with her refusal.

Sugar then appealed the Information Tribunal, and they backed his claims in September. Auntie then took her appeal to the High Court, as she says that the blocking measures she has enforced are there to protect the integrity of her reporting and protects her journalists from interference from the public.

Well, they do say that if you live your life in an abusive environment, you end up being abusive yourself. Evidently Auntie is morphing into Nanny.

Bin Brother

Never let it be said that Nanny is not innovative, when it comes to thinking up new was of monitoring the day to day lives of her charges.

Aside from the many thousands of CCTV cameras in place throughout the country, Nanny is working on new ways to film our lives.

Step forward her chums in Ealing council, who have come up with a real corker of an idea. They are to put cameras into baked bean cans, and house bricks, in order to monitor what people throw away and when they throw it away.

Brilliant!

Nanny's chums in Ealing are concerned about "enviro-criminals", people who leave out black bags when they should not or let the contents spill on to the pavement.

Nanny's chums in Tory run Ealing, which had the dirtiest streets in London in 2004, said:

"To catch vandals and envirocriminals,

cameras disguised as anything from tin cans

to house bricks will email images

to the council's CCTV control centre."

That's all very well, but how do the people of Ealing know that the images collected may not be used for other forms of surveillance or just simply nosey spying by some bored operative?

The essential issue here, as with all forms of surveillance by Nanny, is that people simply do not trust the state not to misuse and abuse the surveillance equipment.

Nanny Wastes Your Money

It is always reassuring to know that as Nanny's best chum, Gordon Brown, prepares to raise taxes that the money he is taking from us is being spent so wisely.

I was particularly heartened to read the other day that unemployed single parents are receiving free massages and beauty treatments, paid for by the taxpayers.

Seemingly Nanny believes that these treatments, labelled "pamper days", will boost their confidence. To date around 1,000 people, mainly women, have had a "pamper day".

By the way, can you guess what is the name of the overall project that "pamper days" are a part of?

Yes, that's right:

Big Brother

The scheme is currently being tested in Hereford, Worcester, Northumberland, Durham and Greater Manchester. Any single parent over 18 who has been unemployed, or on disability benefit, for at least six months con choose from a range of treatments, including a massage, a haircut, new make-up, a facial, a manicure and even ear-piercing.

On top of that, they can also claim a separate £30 to spend on a shopping trip for new clothes, and are eligible for free lunches and childcare.

The Big Brother scheme is run by Inspire2Independence, a private company based in York.

So, I suppose the scheme is at least keeping some people off the dole?

Nanny is Mother, Nanny is Father

Nanny holds the view that if she catches a child when they are young, they are hers for life. Therefore it is very important to Nanny to ensure that the very young are indoctrinated with Nanny's philosophy on life; namely that Nanny is mother and Nanny is father.

Nanny has published a plan that states that even three year olds should be expected to be able to stand up for their rights, the plan also lays out 500 milestones for them to achieve.

Did you know, that Nanny expects babies should be able to show that they can communicate by "crying, gurgling, babbling and squealing"?

How did we function or survive, as human beings, in primitive "pre Nanny" times?

Oh hang on, I know, we had real biological parents who brought us up!

Under Nanny's new rules, nurseries and childminders will have to increase their level of supervision of young children's progress.

Why this sudden interest in young children?

Simple, Nanny is trying to make mothers return to work instead of staying at home to look after the children.

Remember, Nanny believes that the state makes a far better parent than the real biological ones.

I am an old reactionary, I believe that biological parents tend to make better parents than the state.

I guess I will be marked down for re-education by Nanny for that "thought crime"!

Nanny Bans, Then Unbans Pigs

Nanny is a tortured soul, she frets 24 hours a day about the offence that may be given to every single person living in Britain by even the most harmless of remark or action.

In Nanny's world it is always better, and easier, to ban something; lest it cause offence, rather than to allow freedom of speech and freedom of action.

Why?

In my view there are two main reasons for this approach:

1 Nanny fears freedom of thought and action, as of course they undermine her rule

2 Nanny is intellectually lazy and doesn't have the time or ability to justify "controversial" actions, therefore she takes the easy option and bans things.

Here is a particularly fine example of Nanny stupidity, concerning a simple school festival that turned into a battle between common sense and utter stupidity.

Honley Junior School in West Yorkshire was to perform the Roald Dahl story of Little Red Riding Hood and the three little pigs. However, Nanny didn't approve of this and instructed the school to substitute puppies for pigs.

Why?

Isn't it obvious?

Nanny decided that some of the Muslim children singing about pigs would be embarrassed.

Can anyone tell me, at what stage did Britain become an Islamic Kalifate?

Needless to say, there has been a right old hoo ha about this senseless decision, and Kirklees Council has stepped in and authorised the use of pigs in the show.

As ever with deranged decisions, the order to ban the pigs was made by a committee. You see folks in committees no one ever has to take responsibility for acts of utter stupidity, and as such the dimmest and most spiteful of people on the committee manage to get their views acted upon.

Gill Goodswen, who is one of the organisers of the Kirklees Primary Music festival behind the changes, said:

"We have to be sensitive if we want to be multi-cultural.

It was felt it would be more responsible

not to use the three little pigs."

She said the committee had to consider the feelings of children who would be singing along, not just the performers.

"We feared that some Muslim children wouldn't sing along

to the words about pigs.

We didn't want to take that risk.

If changing a few words avoids offence

then we will do so."

Feeble minded people like this, who don't stand up for common sense, allow bullies and extremists to pervert our way of life; she should be reomved from office...PERIOD!

Mohammed Imran, of the nearby Hanfia Mosque and Educational Institute, said that Islam does not ban the mentioning of pigs.

Philip Davies, the Conservative MP for Shipley, said:

"My view is that the people responsible for this

are completely bonkers. It is the type of political correctness

which makes people's blood boil.

As usual it is done in the name of ethnic minorities

but it is perpetrated by white, middle class,

do-gooders with a guilt complex

and far too much time on their hands."

Kirklees council education spokesman, Jim Dodds, stepped up to the mark (to his credit) and said the idea was bollocks:

"There is something barmy going on here

and it has happened on my watch.

I can tell you now that the three little pigs

will be back into the school musical festival.

The decision (to ban the pigs)

was made by well-meaning people -

it was the wrong decision,

so let's stick with the traditions."

Good for him!

The festival is due to take place in June.

Re "well meaning people", these people should not be allowed out on their own, they cause more trouble and division in society than enough; because they spend their lives looking for fault in everything around them they are sad losers, willing to do Nanny's dirty work.

Convince a little man that he is performing a great task for humanity, and he will walk through fire for you.

Bin Brother

Nanny is very concerned about keeping Britain clean and tidy, you only have to walk around some of her fine inner city areas (feel free to name and shame them) to see what a good job she has been doing!

However, let us not dwell on the unfortunately large gap between Nanny's desires and her abilities.

In one particular case Nanny has been very very assertive indeed, as she does her best to protect a beach from litter.

Now, what sort of litter do you think that she was protecting it from?

Paper?

No!

Plastic bags?

No!

Empty cans of drink?

No!

I will tell you.....

Sand

Yes, that's right, sand!

Arthur Bulmer, a pensioner who lives near to the sea, had his seafront garden carpeted with sand the other week, as a result of storms driving the sand up from the beach.

Mr Bulmer decided to use his initiative, and shovel the sand into a wheelbarrow to take it back to the beach in several loads.

Can you guess what happened next?

Yes, that's right, he has been threatened by Nanny with prison or a £50K fine if he carries out his evil plan.

You see, Mr Bulmer lives in St Annes and Fylde Borough Council are particularly good friends of Nanny. Indeed it is sad to say, but local councils throughout the land are sucking up to Nanny in all sorts of nasty and unpleasant ways.

Can anyone really, in their heart of hearts, justify the need for local councils; when you consider how much they charge us in council tax, yet how little they actually do aside from preventing us from enjoying our lives freely?

Anyhoo, Fylde Borough Council told Mr Bulmer that if he moved the sand, it would be classified as fly-tipping; in addition to the threat of jail and a fine, they would also take his wheelbarrow away.

To be fair to Nanny's chums in the local council, their workmen have been slowly taking the sand away from public areas, but not from private areas such as Mr Bulmer's garden.

By the way, some seven tons of sand sat upon his lawn; it is not unreasonable that he wanted to move it.

A spokesman for Fylde Borough Council attempted to explain their stupidity:

"The sand is actually part of the Queen's Crown estate,

which owns most of the foreshore around our coasts.

This year has seen an exceptional problem with wind-blown sand.

We have been cleaning up since Christmas.

But the council has no responsibility to clear sand

or any other debris from private land.

The owner must do this."

He added that dumping "anything" on to the beach from a private garden constituted flytipping.

Unfortunately the "logic" of Nanny's mouthpiece kind of falls apart; for you see, Nanny's workmen have been scraping the sand off the public areas and dumping it back on the beach.

Mr Bulmer ended up paying £500 to some workmen to clear the sand away (I wonder where they put it?).

Feel free to write to Fylde Borough Council to let them know what you think of them via this link Listening@fylde.gov.uk

By the way, in case you would like to understand the structure of Fylde Borough Council may I direct you to this page on their website?

The Council Structure

I think that says it all!

Nanny Bans Bunny Hop

Easter is a coming in, and as ever with Nanny and her minions we can expect the usual banning of chocolate, hot cross buns and the religious symbolism associated with Easter.

However, rather to my surprise, Nanny has also banned bunnys...or rather she has banned the bunny hop.

The town of Llangollen holds an annual Easter Bunny Hop, which raises funds for Oswestry's Hope House. The April event consists of a large group of men, women and children, dressed as rabbits, hopping along the main streets of the town. It has been running for the last three years, and attracts hundreds of visitors.

Unfortunatley Llangollen Enterprise, which organises the hop, have been spooked by Nanny and the compensation culture that she has encouraged; they have decided to ban it this year.

Why?

There is a risk that someone will fall and then sue.

Sad that whenever the word "risk" is mentioned, Nanny immediately bans something.

Nanny has not learnt that risk is omnipresent in our lives, it is down to us to manage it sensibly...not down to her to ban us from living our lives as we would wish to.

Judith Dodd, chairman of the Llangollen Enterprise said:

"The Llangollen Bunny Hop was created to bring

something a little different to the town

just before the Easter holidays and was

thoroughly enjoyed by both competitors and spectators alike.

We've really had to take this decision

because of the litigious nature that has been

seeping into our society from the States over the past few years.

Although Oak Street is extremely well maintained

by Denbighshire County Council, a hop, skip and a stumble

could simply be more trouble than it's worth."

She added:

"The insurance policy was very expensive

in relation to the overall costs of the Bunny Hop

last year and this cost has risen sharply.

This would take away from what we would want to do

with the event but it's the potential hassle,

rather than the sheer cost,

which has seen us reach this unfortunate decision."

Nanny is destroying the fabric of our society, by preventing us from living our lives to the full.

Educashun

Nanny's chum, Lord Dearing, has suggested that teachers should offer classes in languages including; Afghan, Somali, Greek, Hebrew, Turkish, Russian and Farsi.

Quote:

"We should value community languages."

Nanny's Department for Education said that individual schools would decide what language to teach.

"A school in a Somali community

might decide to teach Somali

because there are people who speak the language

and children would hear it

or read in the community every day.

This might encourage them to learn

other languages as they get older."

OK, here's why the above is utter bollocks:

1 This is Britain, and as such, people should be speaking and learning English.

2 Our primary school children are barely able to speak and write English, why the fark should we teach them Somali?

3 There should be no separate "communities" within Britain, merely local communities of British (black, white, green etc) people.

4 "This might encourage..." in other words, it is another experiment being foisted on our decaying educashun system by Nanny.

Should this policy be enacted, it will be doomed to failure.

The Eagle Has Landed

Hello everyone,

Just to let you know that I am back safe and sound in Blighty, after a very successful weekend in Beijing.

FYI, should you ever be passing through, the Kempinski Hotel is well worth a visit; especially its Bavarian Micro brewery and restaurant, the Paulaner Brauhaus.

Ken

Back To Blighty

Hi Folks

I am in the BA departure lounge at Beijing airport...back in Blighty in 12 hours or so.

Had an excellent duck last night.

Best wishes to all

Ken

Beijing

Hi Folks

Here I am in Beijing for a few meetings.

Oddly, although I can access this site, I can't access my sites www.kenfrost.com or www.pcvltd.com....funny old world!

Back on line soon.

Ken

Bin Brother

Nanny's striving for us to all recycle our waste knows no bounds. Nanny is even having a go at her chums in local councils.

Councillor Peter Geiringer, deputy leader of Sutton's Conservative group, has been stripped of his post after admitting a heinous crime.

What was that then?

Child abuse?

No!

Drug dealing?

No!

Theft?

No!

He admitted that he does not recycle, because he is too busy due to all of the committee meetings he has to attend.

Needless to say, Nanny's chums in the Conservative Party were having none of this. Conservative group leader Eleanor Pinfold removed him from his position. He will continue to be a councillor for the Belmont ward.

Coun Pinfold said:

"Peter has accepted he made a mistake on this

and that recycling is a major issue in this borough.

He is an excellent local councillor

and has served the community well

for the last 26 years

and will continue to serve his residents

in Belmont Ward with the same dedication as he has always done".

Twenty six years of service "thrown away" (sad joke there folks)...sorry, but am I the only one who finds his removal from office to be a bit extreme?

After all, he could have just been asked to apologise etc?

Given that some of Nanny's leading ministers have done a few things that are far worse than that, I would have thought some commonsense from the Tories would have been in order here.

Unfortunately, in Nanny's Britain, commonsense and compassion have been eroded.

Councillor Geiringer also made the mistake of admitting he had done something wrong...we never take responsibility for our actions these days, let alone admit our failings.

The Erosion of The Rule of Law

As the concept of personal freedom, privacy and the rule of law is worn away by the Nanny state, so we see unscrupulous people take advantage of this erosion.

It seems that bailiffs could soon be breaking into homes, to seize goods for credit card debts, without a court order.

Citizens Advice have stated that around 60% of bailiffs are guilty of harassment or intimidation, while 40% misrepresent their powers of entry.

Under the Tribunals, Courts and Enforcement Bill, which is being debated in the House of Commons, all bailiffs will be given the power to enter domestic premises and enforce consumer credit debts, including credit card bills.

At present, only certain enforcement officers have these powers.

David Harker, chief executive of Citizens Advice, said:

"Our evidence over many years shows that bailiffs

have an appalling track record of abusing

their existing powers against vulnerable people.

They are often abusive and aggressive

and use threats of violence and prison to

pressurise people into paying lump sums they cannot afford."

Citizens Advice said that many private debt enforcers act almost as a law unto themselves. Checks on 500 bailiff cases revealed intimidation, harassment and excessive fee-charging were commonplace.

The erosion of the rule of law by Nanny will have serious consequences for us all.

ASBO's R'Us

One of Nanny's proudest accomplishments, in her view anyway, is the introduction and extensive use of Anti Social Behaviour Orders (ASBO's).

This brilliant legal instrument, designed to short circuit the tedious process of using the legal system and "due process", was designed by Nanny to bring control back to the streets and enable people to ASBO those elements of society that they don't like; eg noisy neighbours, teenagers and scum.

The trouble is, it is also a remarkably tempting weapon to be used by people who have "old scores" to settle.

When the Nazis occupied the Channel Islands it was remarkable how many anonymous letters the Gestapo received from resident's informing on fellow islanders, ie they were using the new regime to settle old scores.

Unfortunately thus it is for ASBO's.

Nanny would have you believe that ASBO's are generally meted out to troublesome annoying ruffians, who are out to destroy society.

As ever in Nanny's Britain, what she says and what the reality is are two very different beasts.

A recent set of statistics on ASBO's in Eastbourne shows that people aged 50 and over are getting more of them, than unruly teenagers.

Over 50% of the Asbos in Eastbourne are given to the over-50s

One police officer was quoted as saying:

"You automatically think of rowdy teenagers

being the main source of problems.

However, in Eastbourne, it seems a lot of cantankerous

old folk are causing real headaches for their neighbours.

I know the town is called 'God's waiting room'

but it's no fun being in any sort of room

if your next-door neighbour insists on playing

her Des O'Connor collection at full blast at 4am."

in fact, most of Eastbourne's adult Asbos are due to nuisance behaviour, such as the man who did DIY jobs too noisily or another who aggressively pushed his gardening business with door-to-door visits.

The question is, is it right to use the law to settle old scores or conduct vendettas?

That's what happens when you try to limit "due process".

Lazy and Clueless

People may wonder as to the effects of living long term in a Nanny state.

A recent survey by the British Chambers of Commerce gives a pretty clear picture of the effects and dangers of Nannyism.

The survey revealed that British companies are hiring record numbers of migrants, because the bosses have a 'shockingly low opinion' of local British workers.

The survey asked 300 small and medium-sized businesses:

"What reasons do you have for employing migrant workers?."

The answer was loud and clear, migrant workers have "a better work ethic" and are "more productive".

British workers lack the "required skills", and there is a short supply of local "candidates with required experience."

David Frost, director general of the business lobby group, said:

"It is troubling that so many businesses

do not want to employ British workers.

The UK's chronic skills shortage must be addressed

by the Government and reform of the school curriculum

is needed to ensure that young people

enter the workforce with the necessary skills

and the right attitude to get on at work."

Phil Inness, managing director of Axis Electronics, said:

"Around 20% of our workforce is Polish.

In three years of employing from eastern Europe,

we haven't had one negative experience.

The only concern I have is that at some point

they might want to go home."

Relying on Nanny to look after you, dulls your wits and makes you lazy. It is as simple as that.

Plod

Congratulations to our much respect state police force, for once again proving that they are "world class" when it comes to upholding the law.

Pauline Nolan, from Droylsden, recently reported the theft of her two sons' bikes (an orange and black KTM 250 and a black and green Kawasaki 65, which are worth £7,000).

She was driving home, when she spotted two teenagers driving past her on her sons' motocross bikes.

She contacted police, who informed her they had also spotted the offenders.

Guess what happened then?

Yes, that's right...plod refused to chase thieves.

Why?

Because the riders were not wearing helmets, Nanny's police informed her that they could not pursue the offenders in case they fell off and sued them.

Mrs Nolan summed up the stupidity of our way of life rather well:

"It's outrageous, I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

Everything in this country is weighted towards the criminals,

what about the victims?

I think this kind of thing sends out the wrong message

because people think they can get away with anything."

Inspector Martin O'Connor, from Greater Manchester Police, said:

"In situations like this, officers need to carefully

consider the safety of all road users

before deciding whether or not it would be appropriate to begin a pursuit.

This means taking into account the time of day

as well as the prevailing weather and traffic

conditions and the nature of the original offence

and make a risk assessment based on all these circumstances.

In this case, the decision was made

it would not have been safe to pursue the bikes."

As we all know, Manchester is one of the safest places in Britain; thanks to Nanny's ever vigilant police force.

Mrs Nolan said:

"Bradley wants to sell his toys to buy a new one,

he just doesn't understand how somebody can take his bike

and get away with it."

That's the message being sent out...you can now get away with things!

The Old Swimming Hole

Nanny is a strange contradictory old thing, on the one hand she exhorts us to exercise more, yet on the other she tries to stop people taking certain exercise routines in case they injure themselves.

Swimming, often being a dangerous issue for dear old Nanny.

Alan Treece, a retired civil servant from Erith, tries to keep fit by swimming. Unfortunately, Nanny doesn't quite approve of that.

Last year he was about to take his usual swim in the local pool and, as per the normal routine, he was going to dive into the water.

Ahhh...can see what will happen next children?

Yes...that's right...Nanny has banned diving.

The fact that he has been diving into the pool, without injury to himself or others, for the past 20 years brooked no ice with the pool attendant (one of Nanny's minions, known as "irondrawers" by Mr Treece).

Irondrawers warned him not to dive in to the water, as the health and safety Gestapo have decreed that he must lower himself into the water.

Mr Treece ignored the Gestapo, and dived in.

Guess what?

When he reached the other side of the pool, he was confronted by two police officers. They ordered him out of the water, and told him to leave the leisure complex.

He did so but returned that afternoon to complain.

Nanny's police then went to his home, and arrested him.

Errm...aren't our police meant to be arresting criminals instead?

Mr Treece ended up in court on a public order offence, the various court cases took 7 months to get through.

Mr Treece was given a 12-month conditional discharge, and ordered to pay costs of £455 within seven days.

Justice...Nanny style!

White Is Shite

Almost as if the news stories are designed to link together (who could ever accuse media organs of doing that?) it seems that Nanny has legislated against the concept of "white is right".

Nanny's new operational phrase is "white is shite".

That at least is the case for people living in Corby Northamptonshire.

Nanny has decided to denude Corby of some public sector jobs, because its residents are "too white and British".

There you go folks...in Nanny's Britain it is now official policy for it to be illegal to be white and British!

Nanny's much "respected" Prison Service will relocate jobs from Corby to Leicester, where there are more ethnic minorities.

The decision is regarded by most sane people as being utter bollocks, and as such the Commission for Racial Equality may well launch an investigation.

It seems that Nanny, having pushed for people from around the world to move to Britain (to shore up our rapidly declining public sector) is now worried that ethnic minorities are in fact not as "fully employed" as they should be. As such, Nanny is trying to buck market forces and boost the number of ethnic minorities working in the public sector.

When the issue of the movement of 80 jobs in the Prison service to Leicester was raised, the director of finance Ann Beasley replied that the town had too many white British residents.

Quote:

"Our ability to attract a more diverse workforce

- 93.7 per cent of the population of Corby are white British,

compared to 59.6 per cent in Leicester."

Mrs Beasley seemingly went on to imply that Corby's residents are also too stupid to keep the jobs.

The Home Orifice doesn't give a fark, and states quite baldly that attracting a "more diverse workforce" was a "key factor" in moving the jobs.

This is of course a breach of the Race Relations Act 2000.

A spokesman for the Commission for Racial Equality said that if they receive a complaint from any of the workers involved, they will start a full investigation.

Let us trust that at least one affected employee makes a complaint.

A Prison Service spokesman said:

"The key factors that influenced our decision to relocate

to Leicester were the closer proximity to a greater number

of prison establishments, better transport links,

the ability to recruit professional staff

and the ability to attract a more diverse workforce."

This absurd policy will all end in tears, for Nanny and for the people of Britain (whatever their ethnic origin); as it is sowing the seeds of anger, resentment and division.