Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.
Showing posts with label video. Show all posts
Showing posts with label video. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Nanny Cameron Bans Beyonce



Dear oh dear, the Tory Party appears to be regressing to the 1950's in its Canute like reaction to "raunchy" pop videos; as it has had an attack of the "Samantha Bricks" (ie it has completely lost touch with reality).

Nanny Cameron, instead of focusing on issues that really matter (eg wars in the Middle East, austerity, care for the elderly, the Motorman Blue Book) has decided to focus his energies on banning "raunchy" pop videos.

Nanny Cameron has decreed that people under  the age of 18 should not watch scantily clad attractive people gyrate in suggestive manners on videos. He wants the videos classified (in the same manner as films), and for sites that host them to bar under 18's from watching them.

May I ask Nanny Cameron, have you ever watched one of these videos, or is this rather like the pasty that you never really ate?



Factoid: children/teenagers getting sweaty and excited over "raunch" is nothing new, and not a threat to society (whatever the state might try to tell us).

Children/teenagers/adults being subjected to a daily bombardment of violence in soaps and on the TV news is likely to be far more damaging.

I appreciate that Nanny has had a self inflicted lousy few weeks; what with  the "Granny Tax", Pastygate, private dinners, government surveillance etc etc. However, using this as an attempt to divert people's attention from these and other issues is absolutely pathetic and indicates that Nanny has completely lost touch with reality. 

For fark's sake Tories get your act together!

Oh, and for good measure, I see that another person who has never lived in the real world (namely the Duchess of Cornwall) has also decreed that raunchy videos (which she has never watched) are bad for us!

Censorship is Nanny's favourite weapon!

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Thursday, March 15, 2012

Nanny Bans Nipples II



Following yesterday's article about Nanny MTV and Nanny Turner Entertainment’s, Adult Swim Network banning an advert featuring 2012 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover girl, Kate Upton because of swearing and an "erect nipple" a good many loyal readers have taken time to study the video in order to identify the "erect nipple" segment which I could not see.

My thanks to one loyal reader who has sent me two stills from the video, where he has identified what he believes to be the offending nipples.

However, I am not yet convinced as (akin to spot the ball competitions) the location indicated by the arrows don't appear to be where one would expect them to be.

Comments and views welcome!


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Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Nanny Bans Nipples



On the subject of banned adverts, I am advised that MTV and Turner Entertainment’s, Adult Swim Network have banned the above advert featuring 2012 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover girl, Kate Upton because of swearing and an "erect nipple".

I have studied the video and can see no nipple.

Can someone help me out here please?

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Nanny Bans Chav Tranquilizer



As racing aficionados know, it is the Cheltenham Festival. As such the bookies are doing what they do best, and are competing with each other to promote their "wares".

My commiserations to Paddy Power, who put filmed an advert (see above), who have had their advert banned before it was even shown on TV.

Needless to say, the banning of the advert has meant that the video on YouTube has gone viral, and #ChavTranquiliser is trending on Twitter.

Clever Paddy Power, using Nanny's rules against her!

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Tuesday, January 31, 2012

The Golden Wonder Security Video - Resurrected



Re yesterday's article about Golden Wonder Security, it seems that the original video was removed by YouTube.

Fear ye not, I have found the same video, on another portal.

Enjoy!

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Monday, January 30, 2012

Golden Wonder and Hi Vis - UPDATED




As I know that many of my loyal readers hold the wearers of Hi Vis in particularly "fond" and "high" regard, I thought that you may appreciate this video of an altercation between some Hi Vis wearing security guards outside a Golden Wonder factory in Scunthorpe and a local photographer (known as "Hamst") who was trying to take a picture of the building for his site "Visit Scunthorpe".

The Hi Vis wearers are less than pleased, and shower Hamst with threats and abuse (at one point, one of them encourages a colleague to run him down with a car).

I reproduce Hamst's account of his encounter in full below:

"As many people will be aware over the years I have travelled around the town taking photographs of buildings, streets, people, event and many other scenes. I started many years ago both taking and collecting photographs although the vast majority of my images come from the past 4 to five years. I’ve built up quite a library containing thousands of pictures for posterity, a historical record and to use in various articles of local interest of which www.visitscunthorpe.com can be testament to.

A couple of years ago I was challenged whilst taking photo’s at a local under 14’s football match in which my son was taking part. I’d taken photo’s at numerous matches over the years and posted them to the football teams web page on Facebook, something which had caused no bother and the players loved tagging themselves and using them as profile pictures, both my sons team and the opposition. However, after this challenge and thinking I had gone some way to reassure the parent that there was no malice intended I thought I should look deeper into the law and photography within the UK than I previously had.

After hours of research and reading I though I’d gained enough knowledge and understanding to know where I stood within the law should I ever be confronted again, although I don’t profess to be an outright expert. 

Last year that knowledge was put to the test whilst I was passing the hospital and decided to take a few pictures to add to my library. The details of that can be read via this link; 

http://www.visitscunthorpe.com/ScunthorpeNews/Headline/Hospital-Security-Try-To-Prevent-Me-Taking-Photos

Late last year I was over at the Normanby Park and Foxhills Industrial Estates taking photo’s of various businesses and on the whole whilst there was some curiosity by some security guards manning the gates the only ones that queried what I was doing were at the Two Sisters plant. Although they weren’t too pleased with me taking pictures and originally tried to prevent me they conceded I was within my rights, overall the encounter I had with them was quite amicable.

On Tuesday 17th January I decided I would travel the Midland Road Industrial Estate via Cottage Beck Road to take some photographs of industry around this area. Passing the Golden Wonder plant I though it would be a good opportunity to take a few shots of the site, it quickly became clear I wasn’t welcome. I was stood on the road outside the site when a security officer approached. I switched my camera to video mode to record the encounter to protect both myself and the security guards from future false accusations. The footage can be seen above.

Obviously the conduct and tactics used by the two security officers has to be in question.

At 04:53 an employee, who can be seen just walking past, is getting into a car behind me can be heard saying, “I’ll run him over ” to which the female officer actively encourages her by saying, “you do that,” that’s when I moved onto the path. 

What also aggrieves me is that someone in a uniform representing a company in an apparent position of authority can try and intimidate members of the public by making up laws that don’t exist. This seemed to be an attempt to subjugate a member of the public into accepting what was being told was to be true. Further more hurling offensive insults and puerile slander, like seen at the end of the video, surely isn’t something that someone in that position should resort to.

In conclusion I take their actions to be an exception to the standard practise employed by the many fine security officers up and down the country and I can only assume these two individuals actions are not characteristic of the rest of the security team at Golden Wonder.

UPDATED

Those of you with sharp eyes will have noticed that the video (that worked perfectly yesterday) has now been taken down by YouTube.

Fear not, here it is in all its glory!



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Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Prats of The Week - Sainsburys

Ooh err missus, tis time for another Prats of The Week Award!

This week it goes to our old chums at Sainsbury's, for yet again proving that Nanny has managed to remove any shreds of commonsense from a large section of the population.

Kirsty Breeze, 19, and Ian Jackson, 24, were in their local Sainsbury's in Stoke-on-Trent recently and wanted to buy a video for their son Leo who is 2.

The assistant at the shop refused to sell the video to them, unless they could prove they were over 25.

Eh?

Was this a video nasty?

No!

Was this a sex romp?

No!

The video was of "Fireman Sam" (U certificate suitable for all ages).

After much kerfuffle, the hapless couple had to ask Miss Breeze's mum (who is 42) to buy the video on their behalf.

Now those of you with commonsense will no doubt be asking the following:

1 The video was for OK for children, why did Sainsbury's not sell it to the couple without the fuss?

2 Given that both of the couple were over the legal age of consent (for booze, sex etc) why does Sainsbury's insist on a 25 year age bar on "adult" products?

3 The video was obviously mismarked on the computer system as being "age restricted", why didn't the staff at Sainsbury's simply override the system?

The answer to all of the above is simple, Nanny has removed commonsense from many people's mindsets, and Sainsbury's evidently are happy to employ people without commonsense.

Sainsbury's Stoke on Trent, well deserving Prats of The Week!

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Tuesday, May 31, 2011

The Enemy of The People

Enemy of The PeopleIt never ceases to amaze me how our "beloved" and "respected" local councils deem themselves to be above the financial realities of day to day life (namely that one's expenditure should not exceed one's income).

Actually, I know full well why council deem themselves to be above financial reality; they know that they can simply raise taxes (either directly via council tax, or indirectly via ludicrous fines) to cover any shortfall.

That being said the arrogance of those running our local councils does still take my breath away. The Telegraph recently reported that, despite orders to cut spending by around 30%, council executives (let us be clear it is not the councillors but the executives that they employ) are happily spending lavish sums on dinners at Michelin-starred restaurants, leisure trips and expensive gifts (eg iPads and video games).

The travel bill over the last three years has topped £2M to places such as Thailand, Kenya and Bermuda.

Councils have also spent £2M on hotel bills, £2.6M on dinners, £0.5M on gifts etc etc.

The Telegraph estimates that credit card spending by local councils over the last 3 years has topped £100M. Note, some of this will be legitimate and specifically related to genuine business expenditure.

That being said I am at a loss to understand why Horsham Council used a credit card to spend £1150 on two llamas.

The executives of local council are quite clearly taking the piss.

Councils have become the enemy of the people!

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Wednesday, February 09, 2011

What The F***?



Yesterday was Safer Internet Day 2011.

Yes, I didn't know that either!

The above load of tosh video was put together by Insafe, and organisation funded by the EU (ie you and I).

If anyone can enlighten me as to what the fark is going on in the above video, and how that is relevant to iternet safety, I would be very grateful.

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Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Tech Problem?

Folks I am having trouble with YouTube today.

My pc shows that all the videos I have uploaded here have gone black.

Are you also seeing the same?

Thanks

Ken

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Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Nanny Bans Beyonce



Poor Beyonce, all she wanted to do was advertise "her" perfume "Heat". However, Nanny's chums from our old "friends" the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) are not best pleased with her TV advert (watch it above).

As per usual with these things, a handful of people watched the advert and chose to be offended by it. I suspect that the people who tend to complain to ASA are in fact a hard core of "professional complainers", who deliberately seek out material that is "offensive" to them.

Anyhoo, the basis of their complaint this time was that the advert was shown during the day and had been seen by some children. Nanny's shrill screech:

"Won't someone think of the children?"

was exalted throughout the land.

ASA deemed that the advert is "sexually provocative", and "unsuitable to be seen by young children".

ASA have forbidden it from being shown before 7.30pm.

ASA said, and I have to say I am suppressing a snigger or two at the pomposity and nonsense within this:

"Beyonce's body movements and the camera's prolonged focus on shots of her dress slipping away to partially expose her breasts created a sexually provocative ad that was unsuitable to be seen by young children.

We considered that the ad should not have been shown before 7.30pm due to the sexually provocative nature of the imagery
."

Here's why the ruling is bollocks:

1 ASA are somewhat out of touch with the "modern wired" age. Kids can access, and in fact do, far more lurid scenes on the internet.

2 Could it be that ASA, by commenting on the advert in this way, has now encouraged a whole host of kids to try to watch this "naughty" advert?

3 Could it be that those who created the advert had hoped that the handful of regular "professional complainers" would in fact complain, thus giving the advert and product greater publicity and making the video go "viral" on the web (eg I have posted the video here on my site)? ASA, I think, have fallen into a trap here.

I can't see the problem with the advert myself.

All I see is a lady wearing the sort of dress, usually worn by women (though I do live in Brighton:)), that is commonplace at parties and clubs any day of the week. (It does seem though that the airconditioning on the film set has broken down, as she looks a little hot).

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Friday, September 17, 2010

Falling Down

FALLING DOWN: Movie Trailer. Watch more top selected videos about: Falling Down, Robert Duvall

I was walking along The Strand yesterday afternoon, enjoying the sunshine and looking at some of my old haunts.

Then blinky, blonky, blimey...guess what?

I tripped over an uneven paving stone and fell flat on my face.

Today I have a limp and a grazed knee.

Am I suing the council?

Am I fark!

It was my own fault for not looking where I was walking!

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Saturday, August 07, 2010

Police Arrest Pensioner



An elderly man, stopped for not wearing a seatbelt, was chased by police who broke a window and dragged him from his car. The incident was captured on a police video.

A tad over the top don't you think?

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Tuesday, August 03, 2010

What makes 888bingo so popular?

With a name like 888bingo, it is quite obvious that the focus of 888bingo is online bingo.But, most people do not know that 888bingo offers more than the best 75 ball and 90 ball bingo on the Internet. They have diversified their online game offerings so there is something for everybody to play in any different occasion.

Online slots are one of 888bingo’s most popular non bingo games. These easy to play games offer great fun and only take a few minutes to learn. Most people who play online bingo already have experience with online slots, so playing is not a big deal. The slots at 888bingo are a great way to pass the time between online bingo sessions.

Video poker is another one of the popular games that 888bingo offers to its players.
Video poker is one of the easiest games to learn, and if you have a good strategy, you can make a nice profit to supplement your online bingo income.

888bingo also offers traditional table games like blackjack and roulette. No online
gaming portal is complete without these popular online casino games, and 888bingo
makes it easy for you to enjoy them when you are not playing bingo online.

888bingo offers one of the largest selections of instant games online. If you have never played an instant game online before, they work pretty much the same as a traditional scratch card. You purchase a card, play it, and your winnings are automatically deposited into your account. It’s that simple. This is the quickest game you will play online. It takes less than a minute!

If you thought 888bingo only offered online bingo, you were wrong. 888bingo has morphed itself into a one stop online gaming destination that offers all the most popular online gambling games. Next time you are tired of playing online bingo, why not swing over to the online slots section, or play a few instant games. The thrills these games offer are nothing else but a perfect compliment to 75 ball and 90 ball bingo.

Try it today – you will not be sorry!

Friday, July 30, 2010

The Lies Nanny Tells


Disclose.tv - V for Vendetta Speech Video

My thanks to a loyal reader who pointed me in the direction of an article in The Register about Phil Booth, No2ID National Coordinator, who has managed to elicit a very "embarrassing" confession from Nanny's Identity & Passport Service.

Some six months after he first started pestering them about positive "customer/user" comments, used by the Service in publicity material extolling the virtues of using id cards, he has come up with a rather interesting fact.

Can you guess what that is children?

Yes, that's right, eight of the nine people quoted on the website at the time either worked for the Identity and Passport Service (IPS), the Home Office or another government department or agency.

In other words, Nanny used her own minions to pretend to be "real people" to promote her much ridiculed and despised id cards.

It is also noteworthy that it took so long for these lying bastards to finally admit that they were using their own staff.

I would say, at the very least, that using staff in this manner to dupe the public can be construed as "misleading" and surely warrants a complaint to ASA?

How many other Nanny schemes are sold to us in the fraudulent manner?

Never believe what the state tells you, it is clear that the state will always lie and try to deceive.

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Thursday, July 22, 2010

A Scot's Whahaay!


Congratulations to the good people of Scotland!

A report, compiled by Nielsen and published by NHS Scotland, reveals that Scottish adults drank 23.6 units of alcohol a week in 2009, the equivalent of about 12 pints.

The study looked at alcohol sales for the past five years and found that Scottish drinkers buy on average 24% more alcohol than those in the rest of Great Britain.

Well done lads, keep up the good work!

Drink all round!

Factoid: Re "Tunes of Glory" (video extract above) there is a fine drinking game that we played at university with this film. Try having a drink every time a character in the film has a drink, and see if you can get through the entire movie.

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Wednesday, June 02, 2010

Booze Matters - NICE Wades In


Father Ted- Father Jack Gives Up Alcohol

Sir Stephen Muckle | MySpace Video

Last week I observed that Tesco were playing the "minimum price of alcohol" game, and warned that National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence (NICE) were sniffing around too.

Well, as expected, this week NICE have come out fully in favour of a minimum price of alcohol, claiming that it will reduce "problem/binge" drinking.

To my understanding of what Nanny claims to be "binge" drinking, this occurs when people are out and about in pubs and bars. Setting a minimum price will not affect these places, all it will do is push up the price of booze in supermarkets and off licences.

NICE also want more advice pushed down our throats about the dangers of booze.

The BBC, for good measure, interviewed some hapless/hopeless female this morning who had walked on some broken glass when pissed.

Boo Hoo!

She claimed that had she been given more "advice" about the dangers of booze, then the accident might not have happened.

For fark's sake!

When you drink 20 pints, or the equivalent, you know full well that you are pissed. In the event you walk on broken glass, or fall flat on your face you have no one to blame but yourself.

How stupid and irresponsible are people these days?

When I am pissed I immediately summon my sedan chair to convey me from bar to bar.

Does NICE really think that people with this level of "intelligence" will ever heed more advice (from which we are already drowning)?

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

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www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Celebrate the joy of living with booze. Click and drink!

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Nanny Bans Dwile Flonking



Nanny's minions from Norfolk District Council have managed to put the jackboot into a centuries old sport that held its inaugural world championships this Saturday at the Dog Inn pub, in Ludham, Great Yarmouth.

The sport?

Dwile Flonking.

What is Dwile Flonking?

"Flonkers" use a pole to propel a beer soaked cloth at opponents, with the aim of slapping them in the face.

In the event that a flonker misses his/her target twice in a row, the flonker must drink a "pot" (half pint) of ale in one go.

Seems fair enough, yes?

Not if you are Tony Gent, the council's licensing officer. He read about the contest and immediately contacted Lorraine Clinch (landlady of the Dog Inn), to tell her that the contest contravenes Nanny's laws on speed drinking.

New laws introduced in April, by the last bunch of twats in parliament, banned; drinking games, including time limit, all-you-can-drink offers, free alcohol prizes and binge drinking promotions.

Breaches of the law can lead to pubs losing their licences, fines of up to £20,000 for landlords and six months in prison.

For the record, not that Nanny gives a fark, Dwile Flonking is believed by some to have been played in Norfolk and Suffolk since the middle ages (others think it was invented in 1966).

A spokesman for the council droned on and claimed that the pub was visited by the local Nannies for the pub's own good, so that the rules could be then be adapted satisfactorily.

The contest did take place, six teams of 10 battled it out. However, Nanny did win, no beer was downed in one; only ginger beer.

As ever, a local council proves once again that the state is the enemy of the people.

Local councils, what are they good for?

Absolutely nothing!

Feel free to write to Tony Gent via his email tony.gent@north-norfolk.gov.uk.

Editorial note

The video above shows "Dwile Flunking" a variation on the sport, being played in 2008 at the Lewes Arms (Lewes) some 10 mins by train from me.

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

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Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Celebrate the joy of living with booze. Click and drink!

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Come Fly With Me


Vezi mai multe video din Muzica
Good morning loyal readers.

Today I fly (lucky BA!) to Beijing, then Dalian, for a bit of busyness.

Unfortunately, subject to volcanic activity, I will return one day before the general election.

Curses!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Celebrate the joy of living with booze. Click and drink!

Visit Oh So Swedish Swedish arts and handicrafts

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Krakatoa East of Gatwick II


I realise that I may now be sounding like a scratched record on this subject. However, this ongoing incident has so clearly highlighted how schizophrenic and easily swayed Nanny and the media are (ie they are clueless).

Initially safety was the watch word.

All flights banned.

Then comes the baying and moaning from the Brits abroad (who regard 3 holidays a year as part of their national right), about how disgraceful it is that they are stranded in sunny climes.

The media, ever keen to change tack in order to keep a story running, then says that the health and safety issue is overplayed.

Airlines run a few test flights, and pronounce that everything is safe.

Nanny, in the middle of a general election (and worried about looking useless), sends three warships to Europe to rescue our "brave" British holidaymakers.

European heads of travel finally (some days after the event) pick up their video phones and realise that they look incompetent. They authorise the gradual unlocking of the skies of Europe.

Hoorah!!??

Wait until a plane crashes, then we will see the self same media scream that not enough was done to protect people!

The wheel of life turns full circle and strafes our buttocks!

Visit The Orifice of Government Commerce and buy a collector's item.

Visit The Joy of Lard and indulge your lard fantasies.

Show your contempt for Nanny by buying a T shirt or thong from Nanny's Store.

www.nannyknowsbest.com is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Celebrate the joy of living with booze. Click and drink!

Why not really indulge yourself, by doing all the things that Nanny really hates? Click on the relevant link to indulge yourselves; Food, Bonking, Toys, Gifts and Flowers, Groceries